1
00:00:00,400 --> 00:00:04,380
 Scene 1, February 10th, 2025, the restraining order quest.

2
00:00:04,380 --> 00:00:06,920
 Your Honor, we served a request for documents.

3
00:00:06,920 --> 00:00:10,780
 He told us he had a copy of a 2018 restraining order involving Mr. Moon

4
00:00:10,780 --> 00:00:12,580
 and said he'd be happy to provide it.

5
00:00:12,580 --> 00:00:14,620
 Then, he didn't provide it.

6
00:00:14,620 --> 00:00:16,580
 So we filed a motion to compel.

7
00:00:16,580 --> 00:00:20,200
 I didn't respond because I had feelings about it.

8
00:00:20,200 --> 00:00:22,300
 Ah, I see.

9
00:00:22,300 --> 00:00:23,880
 Feelings noted.

10
00:00:23,880 --> 00:00:25,300
 Motion granted.

11
00:00:25,860 --> 00:00:32,460
 Mr. Greer, you will produce the 2018 restraining order by February 24th, 2025.

12
00:00:32,460 --> 00:00:36,680
 Wait, but why can't their lawyer just go get it?

13
00:00:36,680 --> 00:00:40,580
 Because this is discovery, Mr. Greer, not send the defense on a scavenger hunt.

14
00:00:40,580 --> 00:00:41,460
 Translation.

15
00:00:41,460 --> 00:00:44,140
 The court just told him, you said you have it.

16
00:00:44,140 --> 00:00:44,960
 Hand it over.

17
00:00:44,960 --> 00:00:50,520
 Scene 2, February 12th, 2025, Rule 26, the show and tell disaster.

18
00:00:50,520 --> 00:00:55,680
 Mr. Greer, did you provide witnesses and evidence in your Rule 26 disclosures?

19
00:00:55,680 --> 00:01:02,580
 Um, I provided, um, like, the concept of witnesses, Your Honor.

20
00:01:02,580 --> 00:01:10,120
 The record shows you twice failed to provide any witnesses or evidence in your Rule 26, A-1 disclosures.

21
00:01:10,120 --> 00:01:11,240
 Here's what we're doing.

22
00:01:11,240 --> 00:01:16,040
 You will pay defendants $1,000 by March 13, 2025.

23
00:01:16,040 --> 00:01:17,720
 Oh, no.

24
00:01:17,720 --> 00:01:20,220
 Well, buddy, that's a lot of money.

25
00:01:20,220 --> 00:01:21,760
 That seems harsh, Your Honor.

26
00:01:21,760 --> 00:01:22,640
 Seriously?

27
00:01:22,640 --> 00:01:24,420
 This is a courtroom, Russell.

28
00:01:24,420 --> 00:01:26,780
 Federal court is not improv comedy.

29
00:01:26,780 --> 00:01:30,300
 You don't get to just freestyle the entire discovery process.

30
00:01:30,300 --> 00:01:35,020
 Scene 3, May to June, 2025, the sanctions Olympics.

31
00:01:35,020 --> 00:01:41,820
 I would like to file a motion to stay, a motion to reconsider, a motion to un-stay the state,

32
00:01:41,820 --> 00:01:45,400
 and a motion to pause the consequences of my actions, Your Honor.

33
00:01:45,400 --> 00:01:46,880
 Pretty please.

34
00:01:46,880 --> 00:01:49,560
 Your Honor, he's just refusing to pay the sanctions,

35
00:01:49,560 --> 00:01:54,700
 and instead he keeps filing motions like I'm eventually going to get overwhelmed and decide to settle.

36
00:01:54,700 --> 00:01:56,620
 For the record, I'd rather die.

37
00:01:56,620 --> 00:02:00,120
 Mr. Greer, the sanction was due March 13th, and you didn't pay it.

38
00:02:00,120 --> 00:02:03,920
 I denied your request to delay sanctions, bitch, so you better have that money.

39
00:02:03,920 --> 00:02:06,640
 Um, just let me explain, Your Honor.

40
00:02:07,080 --> 00:02:11,060
 Instead of paying up, I'm trying to petition the government for redress first.

41
00:02:11,060 --> 00:02:12,900
 Yeah, cool. Good luck with that.

42
00:02:12,900 --> 00:02:15,920
 Anyways, just because you're in the middle of filing something else

43
00:02:15,920 --> 00:02:19,660
 doesn't mean you can just ignore a standing court order for sanctions.

44
00:02:19,660 --> 00:02:21,400
 Get that wallet out.

45
00:02:21,400 --> 00:02:25,000
 Then we get to the court's June 10th, 2025 order.

46
00:02:25,000 --> 00:02:30,000
 This is when the tone of the court shifts from substitute teacher to stern dad mode.

47
00:02:30,000 --> 00:02:31,100
 Here's the bottom line.

48
00:02:31,100 --> 00:02:34,960
 Ratface, pay the $1,000 by June 30th, 2025.

49
00:02:35,460 --> 00:02:37,520
 If you don't, you'll pay another $500.

50
00:02:37,520 --> 00:02:42,280
 Also keep in mind, filing additional motions will not in fact delay your payment date.

51
00:02:42,280 --> 00:02:43,780
 Uh, wait.

52
00:02:43,780 --> 00:02:46,680
 So filing motions won't stop the deadlines?

53
00:02:46,680 --> 00:02:47,580
 Woo-ha?

54
00:02:47,580 --> 00:02:48,780
 Correct, bozo.

55
00:02:48,780 --> 00:02:51,840
 This isn't some video game pause menu, you know.

56
00:02:51,840 --> 00:02:52,920
 Scene 4.

57
00:02:52,920 --> 00:02:54,820
 September 30th, 2025.

58
00:02:54,820 --> 00:02:56,320
 Discovery, the sequel.

59
00:02:56,320 --> 00:02:58,860
 Remember the 2018 restraining order?

60
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 The one that Greer was ordered to find proof for back in February.

61
00:03:02,280 --> 00:03:03,560
 Well, guess what?

62
00:03:03,760 --> 00:03:06,420
 Your Honor, Russ Tart still hasn't produced the document.

63
00:03:06,420 --> 00:03:12,080
 After February 24th passed, the court discussed it again at a May 6th hearing, ordered the production

64
00:03:12,080 --> 00:03:18,600
 again, warned Greer about Rule 37, B sanctions, and gave more deadlines, but still nothing.

65
00:03:19,080 --> 00:03:22,800
 Um, so, I didn't get it because it's expensive.

66
00:03:22,800 --> 00:03:26,680
 Also, now that I think about it, it's probably irrelevant anyways.

67
00:03:26,680 --> 00:03:29,400
 So, just like, move on or something.

68
00:03:29,400 --> 00:03:30,060
 Jeez.

69
00:03:30,060 --> 00:03:35,500
 You didn't respond to the motion to compel, so you waved away the relevance argument already.

70
00:03:35,500 --> 00:03:41,460
 You were ordered again to produce it, with deadlines including May 20th and then June 3rd.

71
00:03:41,460 --> 00:03:43,400
 Oh, jeez.

72
00:03:43,400 --> 00:03:45,580
 Caught me some slack then.

73
00:03:45,580 --> 00:03:47,200
 At least I gave him the case number.

74
00:03:47,200 --> 00:03:48,560
 Isn't that enough?

75
00:03:48,560 --> 00:03:53,520
 Now, Bish, providing the case number is not the same as producing the relevant document.

76
00:03:53,520 --> 00:03:57,760
 Plus, he keeps filing reconsideration motions instead of producing it, Your Honor.

77
00:03:58,120 --> 00:04:01,540
 Yes, I am aware, and I am denying those considerations.

78
00:04:01,540 --> 00:04:10,300
 Mr. Greer, you are hereby ordered to show cause by October 14th, 2025, why Rule 37, B sanctions,

79
00:04:10,300 --> 00:04:14,200
 should not be imposed on you for failing to obey these discovery orders.

80
00:04:14,200 --> 00:04:17,380
 FYI, show cause is court speak for.

81
00:04:17,380 --> 00:04:20,760
 Explain why I shouldn't punish you for ignoring a court order.

82
00:04:20,760 --> 00:04:26,420
 Scene 5, September 30th, 2025, Rule 11, the stop and think incident.

83
00:04:26,420 --> 00:04:28,380
 Same day, different dumpster fire.

84
00:04:28,380 --> 00:04:32,480
 This is the part where a new rule, Rule 11, comes into play.

85
00:04:32,480 --> 00:04:37,680
 Your Honor, Rule 11 requires reasonable investigation before filing factual claims.

86
00:04:37,680 --> 00:04:43,280
 We served him a Rule 11 motion and told him he made two materially false statements in his court submissions.

87
00:04:43,280 --> 00:04:46,300
 Um, I disagree with the term materially.

88
00:04:46,300 --> 00:04:49,280
 Also, I'm not sure what that means, harp derp.

89
00:04:49,280 --> 00:04:52,180
 The defense may feel free to explain the specifics.

90
00:04:52,180 --> 00:04:53,440
 Thanks, Your Honor.

91
00:04:53,440 --> 00:04:59,460
 First off, Greer filed an accusation against my defense counsel, claiming we violated a court's protective order,

92
00:04:59,460 --> 00:05:02,200
 but he later admitted he had not read the protective order.

93
00:05:02,200 --> 00:05:04,740
 Also, he didn't know what it actually constituted.

94
00:05:04,740 --> 00:05:07,580
 Uh, I assume that, uh...

95
00:05:07,580 --> 00:05:08,180
 Dude, shut up.

96
00:05:08,180 --> 00:05:09,460
 For real, shut up.

97
00:05:09,460 --> 00:05:15,120
 Literally, the whole point of Rule 11 is to prevent instances where people just assume shit.

98
00:05:15,120 --> 00:05:17,180
 Continue defense.

99
00:05:17,180 --> 00:05:18,020
 Gladly.

100
00:05:18,020 --> 00:05:19,680
 Second, he claimed a witness.

101
00:05:19,680 --> 00:05:24,260
 Some guy named Steve Taylor was totally legit real and also eager to testify.

102
00:05:24,260 --> 00:05:26,780
 But it turns out that Steve is fucking dead, Your Honor.

103
00:05:26,780 --> 00:05:28,720
 And Greer hadn't spoken to him in years.

104
00:05:28,720 --> 00:05:29,680
 Whoa.

105
00:05:29,680 --> 00:05:30,720
 He's dead.

106
00:05:30,720 --> 00:05:31,800
 Oh, crap.

107
00:05:31,800 --> 00:05:33,160
 I'm a total idiot.

108
00:05:33,160 --> 00:05:33,620
 I...

109
00:05:33,620 --> 00:05:42,780
 Indeed, you are a complete and total idiot, since as a paralegal, you should have known that you're required to make a reasonable inquiry before filing under oath.

110
00:05:42,780 --> 00:05:49,020
 What you did is called having a pure heart, but an empty head, and we simply don't allow that in our court.

111
00:05:49,020 --> 00:05:59,520
 "I'm granting Rule 11 sanctions. You will pay the defendant's reasonable attorney fees that directly resulted from these Rule 11 violations. We'll determine the amount after briefing."

112
00:05:59,520 --> 00:06:08,280
 Oh, no. Oh, this sucks. I was supposed to be the one being awarded money from him, not the other way around.

113
00:06:08,280 --> 00:06:12,740
 Indeed, but unfortunately, you are quite retarded, and you're bad at the law.

114
00:06:12,740 --> 00:06:15,120
 Bailiff, kick this man in the nuts.

115
00:06:15,120 --> 00:06:16,120
 Oh no!

116
00:06:16,120 --> 00:06:21,720
 Scene 6, October 31st, 2025. Greer appeals to Dad.

117
00:06:21,720 --> 00:06:24,080
 Welcome back to my court, Mr. Greer.

118
00:06:24,080 --> 00:06:27,460
 I trust you have had time to think and learn your lesson?

119
00:06:27,460 --> 00:06:28,980
 Ha ha, hell no.

120
00:06:28,980 --> 00:06:32,180
 I object to the Rule 11 sanctions.

121
00:06:32,180 --> 00:06:35,740
 My incorrect statements were just innocent errors, Your Honor.

122
00:06:35,740 --> 00:06:40,020
 I'm just a stupid pro se litigant, so you must treat me like a baby.

123
00:06:40,020 --> 00:06:42,480
 Also, I declare judicial privilege.

124
00:06:42,560 --> 00:06:45,680
 Also, the First Amendment or something, I don't even know anymore.

125
00:06:45,680 --> 00:06:47,200
 It is what it is, dummy.

126
00:06:47,200 --> 00:06:51,760
 Greer accused me of violating a protective order that he admits he never even read.

127
00:06:51,760 --> 00:06:54,760
 On top of that, the witness statement was plainly false.

128
00:06:54,760 --> 00:07:00,720
 Yes, and I reviewed the magistrate judge's non-dispositive ruling for clearly erroneous.

129
00:07:00,720 --> 00:07:02,660
 It is not clearly erroneous.

130
00:07:02,660 --> 00:07:04,400
 Objection overruled.

131
00:07:04,400 --> 00:07:08,520
 Also, judicial privilege doesn't shield you from Rule 11 sanctions.

132
00:07:08,940 --> 00:07:12,940
 Baseless litigation is not protected by the First Amendment right to petition.

133
00:07:12,940 --> 00:07:16,780
 Free speech isn't just some get-out-of-perjury free card.

134
00:07:16,780 --> 00:07:19,580
 Scene 7, December 2nd, 2025.

135
00:07:19,580 --> 00:07:21,340
 One more reconsideration.

136
00:07:21,340 --> 00:07:22,740
 Welcome back, Mr. Greer.

137
00:07:22,740 --> 00:07:24,120
 Still a moron, I'm guessing.

138
00:07:24,120 --> 00:07:25,820
 Oh, heck yeah, you called it.

139
00:07:25,820 --> 00:07:29,560
 I'm filing another motion to undo the thing that's already been done.

140
00:07:29,560 --> 00:07:30,940
 Again, again.

141
00:07:30,940 --> 00:07:33,700
 Acknowledge my incredibly genius legal mind.

142
00:07:33,940 --> 00:07:35,320
 Your Honor, for the love of God.

143
00:07:35,320 --> 00:07:36,220
 Denied.

144
00:07:36,220 --> 00:07:37,340
 Overruled.

145
00:07:37,340 --> 00:07:38,880
 Get that shit out of here.

146
00:07:38,880 --> 00:07:39,780
 Bailiff.

147
00:07:39,780 --> 00:07:41,500
 Hit Russell in the nuts again.

148
00:07:41,500 --> 00:07:43,020
 Oh no, oh!

149
00:07:43,020 --> 00:07:49,400
 I would like to remind the court that this case of contributory copyright infringement has been in motion for like five years,

150
00:07:49,400 --> 00:07:51,560
 and we're still not even into the discovery stage,

151
00:07:51,560 --> 00:07:55,840
 because this brain-dead doofus has been mucking up the process every chance he's gotten.

152
00:07:56,220 --> 00:08:00,720
 It's in this council's opinion that Russell Greer is litigious, frivolous, and crazy,

153
00:08:00,720 --> 00:08:04,440
 and at this point we recommend revoking his ability to file electronically

154
00:08:04,440 --> 00:08:08,960
 so that maybe he'll think for five seconds before writing more nonsense that wastes all our time.