DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell: General Discussion #2

[TheGreatWhiteNorth]

Oh there's a way:
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You see when you have Phil's very unique "I perpetually need help with tips for a reason thats none of your business" problem...
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It's actually very easy and only takes a few minutes to blow through hundreds of dollars...
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Easily.

Jeez, I'd characterize Phil as a leech, but the amount of salt he generates would end up killing him. Oh wait, that's the gin's job.

 

[gaarashatan]

im waiting for the day phil has a kidney stone then complains about it on stream and how its so horrible and did not deserve it and did nothing wrong

why must drinking make you dehydrated and why would dehydration give you a kidney stone, FUCKING BUGGED MECHANICS DOOD

 

[Piece of Peace]

DSP Twist Ending:

He's been dumping all his extra PayPal money into a crypto wallet which we don't have eyes on so is actually set for multiple lifetimes. He just begs on stream because findom is the only way to get his penne hard. He eventually liquidates for a Tesla Space Yacht and sails off into the sunset with his Kat and cat.​

DSP True Ending:

Goes into cardiac arrest and dies on stream because he's a worthless unhealthy piece of shit. A detractor calls 911 because his dentheads don't know that his address has been doxxed for years. OiC furiously jacking off the whole time, dies from erotic auto asphyxiation because he's too much of a fuck-up to do even that right. Last chat message before Null shuts down the forum is from marlintan talking about his newly acquired M249 SAW. Fin.​

 

[Freshtodeath]

He doesn;t have the balls/risk to put anything in crypto. All his money gets flushed down the toilet AKA take out food.

 

[ZehnBoat]

He doesn;t have the balls/risk to put anything in crypto. All his money gets flushed down the toilet AKA take out food.

what are ya talkin about dood
phil has an nft

this is not shopped

 

[PieceofShet]

When was the last time DSP played SF2 offline againts another human?

 

[Lord_Point]

When was the last time DSP played SF2 offline againts another human?

He cant because no life losers spend all day practicing off line tactics in reverse delay environments!

 

[Sparkletor 2.0]

I saw some questions about Phil's job history a few pages back, and here's the best I can piece together:

1999-2000? Making salads at the mall food court. Phil most likely quit after graduating in 2000 and went to college. Phil claims that he was at the mall during 9-11-2001 and talked to his former boss, so he was not working there.

2001? Selling life insurance. This was a summer job that he quit and got mad that the company wanted to charge him for wasting their time and money.

2002-2004 Circuit City. This was after he flunked out of the first semester of college and was living at home. Allegedly his parents wanted money eventually. Claims he worked there for 2 years. Couldn't find a reason for him leaving.

2004 Graduated college

2005 Wells Fargo. Claimed he moved out of town with two coworkers. Worked there for about 6 months before either a) leaving because he didn't agree with the predatory loan practices or b) getting fired for trying to tattle on his manager for dating one of the employees. Got kicked out of the house because he lost his job and moved back in with mom and dad.

2005-2006 Lived off his credit cards racking up debt and playing video games.

2006 Best Buy. According to the legal paperwork regarding his unemployment claim, he was let go in 2006. Lasted less than a year. Fired for using his employee discount to run a for profit game tournament. Interesting note, the unemployment paperwork seem to insinuate that this was not a one time thing and their company policy gives them the right to withhold unemployment benefits from an employee who has had three violations within a year.

2006-2010 Sikorsky. Infamous helicopter job where Phil practically ran the whole place and was fired for no reason.

2010-2022 Unemployed and begging for money from strangers on the Internet.

 

[actually]

When was the last time DSP played SF2 offline againts another human?

Not since he moved to Washington, at minimum.

 

[PetiteDragon43]

what are ya talkin about dood
phil has an nft

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this is not shopped

I'd buy that for a dollar.

 

[Watamelon]

Oh there's a way:
View attachment 2894643
You see when you have Phil's very unique "I perpetually need help with tips for a reason thats none of your business" problem...
View attachment 2894645
View attachment 2894646

It's actually very easy and only takes a few minutes to blow through hundreds of dollars...
View attachment 2894647

Easily.

Just wanted to add something semi-related to this gacha/gambling talk.

In Granblue Fantasy -another JP gacha- they recently added a new summon who is basically, game breaking. Allows you to do some bullshit you absolutely cannot do otherwise, and the only way to get him is to just, roll and pray. On a fucking 0.11% chance basically.

Take into account the game throws freebies over and over but there's still people sinking 800$ per banner just to get the new unit, since that's the guaranteed character cost -called a spark-. A JP player spent 6000$ on said banner to try get him and failed.

https://twitter.com/TamamoMamefu/status/1477100173335871492

What does an addict like him -and DSP- do? Keep rolling!

https://twitter.com/TamamoMamefu/status/1477183487275048965

So yeah, if you're ever wondering how fast DSP's money flies when you're addicted to a gacha, just think that every month there's a new broken character that will cost you thousands. And DSP needs several of those because WWEC is predatory even by korean skinner box standards.

 

[PetiteDragon43]

im waiting for the day phil has a kidney stone then complains about it on stream and how its so horrible and did not deserve it and did nothing wrong

why must drinking make you dehydrated and why would dehydration give you a kidney stone, FUCKING BUGGED MECHANICS DOOD

Spoiler: Power Leveling bullshit

I had one of those a few years ago. I can emphatically say I wouldn't even wish that on DarkSydePhil. I don't think I ever felt a pain like that in my life.

He doesn;t have the balls/risk to put anything in crypto. All his money gets flushed down the toilet AKA take out food.

That and he just refuses to do the research to invest in stocks. He would rather spend four dollars a week on Lotto Tickets because "you never know". More than that he still doesn't see Crypto as anything more than a fad created by some internet nerds. So imagine if a wheelchair actually donated a bitcoin to him. He would stutter and sweat and instantly run to google to see how "rich" he is even though he's 6 years late. If he were smart he would start looking into NFT as if it could be the next valid form of currency because even Uber drivers can request you pay in Bitcoin now

 

[Funko Pops NFT collector]

Near end of boomer segment slow night stream status:

Total tip: $62

Top tips: Bosco V and OIC (under Bob Harris sock) each tipped $20

Double tweet slow stream tonight

Still no money coming in until he does his imprompt ask the pig segment

Where Bosco V and Bob Harris (a OIC sock, he was in Chat and eluding to tipping) together combined for $40 out of the $62 tips

DSP now describing the car accident that led to his back injury as "fatal"

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Everyone who talks about the weight they lift online is lying. That being said, I just deadlifted 2000lbs.

Gorilla Pimp: "My max bench is 285 close to 300! Also my deadlift is 315", 99% chance he is role playing as someone who lifts because those numbers make no sense,and if it not RP then his body is asymmetrical as fuck, the deadlift is the exercise that allows you to pull the most weight along with the squat,for example the Eddie Hall(world strongest man 2017) can bench press 672lbs and did a 1.100lbs deadlift, as you can see the difference is very clear between the two. Saying you bench 285 and deadlift 315 is like saying you can bench 285 and barbell row(the equivalente for the back) 150lbs, what the fuck is his body if he is not roleplaying? lol.

 

[ParksydeDhil]

Gorilla Pimp: "My max bench is 285 close to 300! Also my deadlift is 315", 99% chance he is role playing as someone who lifts because those numbers make no sense,and if it not RP then his body is asymmetrical as fuck, the deadlift is the exercise that allows you to pull the most weight along with the squat,for example the Eddie Hall(world strongest man 2017) can bench press 672lbs and did a 1.100lbs deadlift, as you can see the difference is very clear between the two. Saying you bench 285 and deadlift 315 is like saying you can bench 285 and barbell row(the equivalente for the back) 150lbs, what the fuck is his body if he is not roleplaying? lol.

What if he really is a gorilla?

 

[Sparkletor 2.0]

What if he really is a gorilla?

Then his penis is about 1.25 inches.

 

[UncleTusky]

2002-2004 Circuit City. This was after he flunked out of the first semester of college and was living at home. Allegedly his parents wanted money eventually. Claims he worked there for 2 years. Couldn't find a reason for him leaving.

2004 Graduated college

I think your DSP college lore is wrong, possibly because Phil is too retarded to keep his lies straight: In his telling he did fine the first semester or two in a CS major, then took a programming class which was taught by a professor so inept that he could not pass and wound up switching to management. This also lines up better with his claims to have graduated in 2004 - if he really did flunk out he should not have finished until 2005 or later since many upper-level classes are only offered once / year rather than every semester.

 

[Optimus Prime]

If he were smart he would start looking into NFT as if it could be the next valid form of currency because even Uber drivers can request you pay in Bitcoin now

He's too busy being hip and trendy by bitching out Troy for his NFT.

 

[Full Race Replay]

I think your DSP college lore is wrong, possibly because Phil is too retarded to keep his lies straight: In his telling he did fine the first semester or two in a CS major, then took a programming class which was taught by a professor so inept that he could not pass and wound up switching to management. This also lines up better with his claims to have graduated in 2004 - if he really did flunk out he should not have finished until 2005 or later since many upper-level classes are only offered once / year rather than every semester.

My understanding was that DSP started in computer science, then downgraded to something else, then downgraded again to business, which he graduated with.

 

[King of Not Playing Games]

I think your DSP college lore is wrong, possibly because Phil is too retarded to keep his lies straight: In his telling he did fine the first semester or two in a CS major, then took a programming class which was taught by a professor so inept that he could not pass and wound up switching to management. This also lines up better with his claims to have graduated in 2004 - if he really did flunk out he should not have finished until 2005 or later since many upper-level classes are only offered once / year rather than every semester.

I refuse to believe Phil "did fine" two semesters into a CS major. CS isn't really about computers, it's (relatively) advanced math, data structures, and algorithms. In his first two semesters he would have almost certainly taken calculus and a basic algorithms class, and if that's true, I want to see his fucking grades.

 

[DZoomer]

Gorilla Pimp: "My max bench is 285 close to 300! Also my deadlift is 315", 99% chance he is role playing as someone who lifts because those numbers make no sense,and if it not RP then his body is asymmetrical as fuck, the deadlift is the exercise that allows you to pull the most weight along with the squat,for example the Eddie Hall(world strongest man 2017) can bench press 672lbs and did a 1.100lbs deadlift, as you can see the difference is very clear between the two. Saying you bench 285 and deadlift 315 is like saying you can bench 285 and barbell row(the equivalente for the back) 150lbs, what the fuck is his body if he is not roleplaying? lol.

What you failed to take into account is that those deadlifts are performed while sitting on a wheelchair. Much more challenging, dood!