I checked into telegram a couple of months back to discover they had designated a useful idiot to share a video of Black Pearl engaged in some diaper diddling action, the twist being they’d paid their guy to give us a personalised shout out in the video.
There appears to have been two conflicting ideas that were held simultaneously in the run up to Black Pearls arrest;
1 - Romy Sasmita is a deranged meth head who’ll go to prison any second now.
2 - Let’s send Romy Sasmita money and pay for him to take part in our Internet slapfight.
They pressed the second button, but not before going to some comical lengths to try and conceal the origin of the video and the paypig behind it. I’d wager it was then passed onto their tard for distribution, who felt like he’d just hit the jackpot. It is likely he didn’t even know Black Pearl was the VO.
I might be wrong but I think we ourselves were actually not supposed to know the VO was Black Pearl. I’ll never see the conversations but the idea of his paypigs saying ‘yo, just keep the doraemon rug out of view, we’re gonna teach those kiwikarens a lesson this time’ still cracks me up.
The idea Romy was personally invested in this shit and distraught by his masturbation footage being laughed at here is even better.
Anyway, after deciding the best man for the job was a mentally unstable drug addict with a collection of dead monkeys scattered about his yard who had already shown his face on YouTube, whose phone number and vehicle details were public knowledge, they embarked on their little venture.
Two weeks later I would receive a photograph of Black Pearls arrest as it unfolded. I haven’t been given permission to share it here, and it does not belong to me, so we decided a good compromise would be to recreate it as a piece of art. Maybe it will make it to the press one day, and I pray it does because it’s funny as fuck.
But until then, courtesy of Easy, behold the trillion pity arrest of Romy Sasmita;
Upon seeing the original image Easy noted that he looked like a bowling ball.
I believe he exists somewhere between Wimpy, hamburger enthusiast of the Popeye series, and Elmer Fudd.
For me this will always be the archetypal face of monkey molestation. Nose almost touching the lower lip, the mouthful of gums, popped collar, bulging forehead, eyes clenched shut in an effort to block out the chaos unfolding around him, sweat dripping as he anticipates his impending meth withdrawal.
Truly a face of pity.
