Are you a Lolcow? Take the quiz! 2024 edition.

[SwanSwanson]

Previous thread

The last quiz was posted in 2014. It had flaws, like your age. (How does being 28+ make you a lolcow?) and missed things that are relevent to current year stuff, like troons. Updated quiz

1. What is your sex/gender?
-Male (0)
-Female (5)
-Transgender MTF(60)
-Transgender FTM (20)
-NB Male (20)
-NB Female (10)

2. What fandoms do you belong to? Add all that apply.

-Sonic the Hedgehog (15)
-Naruto (5)
-Superwholock (7)
-Final Fantasy (5)
-Pokemon (5)
-Homestuck (7)
-Avatar/Korra (5)
-Other anime (5)
-Nintendo (5)
-Kids media in general (10)


3. What is your sexuality?
-Heterosexual (0)
-Homosexual (25)
-Bisexual (10)
-Bisexual but mostly directed at weird paraphillias like femboy/tranny crap ( 8 )
-Asexual (0) if male (10) if female.

4. Are you a fan of Yuri/yaoi

-Yes (10)

-No(0)

5. Do you seriously get pressed over shipping in general?

-Yes(5)
-No(0)

6. What is your level of artistic skill?
-I don't do art. (0)
-Terrible (5)
-Mediocre (3)
-Average (-5)
-Good (-10)

(Post your work as proof)

7. What is your religion?

-Christian/muslim (0)
-Anything else (10)

8. Are you left or right economically?

-Left wing (0)
-Centrist (0)
-Right wing, rape me harder corporations!!! (10)

9. Are you left or right socially?

-Conservative (0)
-Moderate (5)
-Progressive (15)

10. I'm le hecking apolitical and hate politics! (12)

11. Are you a furry?

-A: Yes (20)
-B: No (0)

12. How prone are you to become angry?
-I have a hair trigger (10)
-I frustrate easily (6)
-I sometimes get annoyed (3)
-I'm fairly mellow (0)

13. Do you use strong language?
-FUCKPISSSHITCUNTCOCKSUCKERMOTHERFUCKERTITS (10)
-Damn straight! (5)
-No (0)

14. Virgin?

-No (0) if male (5) if female
-No but Im a woman only lost my virginity to my current husband (-10)
-Yes (5) if male (0) if female.

15. Are you autistic or do you have a diagnosed mental disorder?
-Yes (5)
-No (0)

16. What is your housing situation?
-Dependent on parents (5)
-Roommates(2)
-Not dependent on parents (0)
-Homeless and bumming off Wifi (5)

17. Are you a NEET?
-Yes (10)
-No (2)
-Retired/Passive income (0)

18. What is the highest level of education you completed?
-High school dropout (10)
-High school diploma (5)
-Associates (2)
-Bachelor's degree (0)
-Master's degree or higher (-5)

19. What is your race

-African (5)
-European/White Hispanic (5)
-Indian (10)
-Jew (10)
-Other (0)

20. What is your weight?

-Extremely underweight (5)
-Underweight (5) if male, (0) if female
-Average weight (0)
-Overweight (5)
-Strongfat (0)
-Obese (15)

21. Sobriety?

-Cigarettes (4)
-Weed (8 )
-Alcohol (20)
-Psychedelics (16)
-Other hard drugs crack, meth, etc (20)

If you only use these things rarely divide by 2, if you're trying to quit divide the score by 4
22. Do you practice sissy/femboy/trap/crossdressing shit? (Ignore if MTF or Bio female)

-Yes (40)
-No (0)
23.

(Note: you cant have a negative score)

0-15: Normal. Too Normal.

16-35: Eccentric. Kind of an oddball, but okay in spite of (or maybe because of) your weirdness.

36-50: Laughing stock. Not too noteworthy, but enjoyable to point and laugh at.

51-120: Lolcow. You will be mocked, and you will deserve it.

120+: BITCH, ARE YOU FOR REAL?! Time for you to have a wiki dedicated to you!

 

[Broadside]

15 lol not bad

 

[Dropsies]

38 not looking good for me

 

[Dufe]

8, which is not labeled 8, should reflect the political compass better. Overall needs more options in most questions. If I have to say "not applicable" to most questions, you've got to rethink things.

 

[TTD = Total Tarkov Death]

Can’t even do this quiz as is, we need a ‘politics is gay’ option. The fuck even is a moderate? I just refuse to partake in the Jewish American political system. Give me an option.

 

[SwanSwanson]

Can’t even do this quiz as is, we need a ‘politics is gay’ option.

Added

 

[TTD = Total Tarkov Death]

Okay well now I’ve been admin abuse’d into lolcowdom.

 

[Cats]

I always knew I was normal.

 

[ducktales4gameboy]

15. Weird, thought I'd skew higher.

Suggest splitting the employment one to employed/unemployed but non-neet/neet, the lack of effort is a big tell for cows.

 

[SwanSwanson]

15. Weird, thought I'd skew higher.

Suggest splitting the employment one to employed/unemployed but non-neet/neet, the lack of effort is a big tell for cows.

Already did so

 

[Aljam]

78

 

[Fireman Sam]

I swear like a sailor.
and I sometimes get annoyed. So that's fine.
being white earns me 5 extra points (very racist and you should be ashamed!)
Politics is gay but everyone has their values.

10 points just for swearing a lot is probably a bit too op. Clearly this was made by a bitch who replaces words like fuck and god damn with frick and gosh darn it.

Final score: 20. I'll take it. I'm pretty normie in comparison to some people and their hobbies here. But you're a fuckin cunt for giving me 10 points just the ability to call you such! :^)

 

[The Feline Solution]

45 points.

 

[soulgains]

I got 15 if i did this correctly lmfao

 

[gagabobo1997]

45
its over

 

[Spilled Spaghett]

I knew I was autistic but damn did we really have to quantify it?

 

[Atypical Dog]

Suggesting another question:

Kiwi Farms Account?
Yes (5)
No (-5)
Lurk Only (10)

 

[Your Starter for 10]

I got a 39, but I think 10 points for being a non-proselytizing atheist is a bit high.

I should work on my anger issues, I guess.

 

[SwanSwanson]

78

Pink Triangle too? Damn...

 

[PunkinMan]

63, yeah that tracks lol. You should add a score for sobriety, if you did mine would probably be over 100 easily lol,

It should be categorized as
Cigarettes - 5
Weed - 15
Alcohol - 20