Nicholas Robert Rekieta / Rekieta "Law" / Actually Criminal / @NickRekieta - Polysubstance enthusiast, "Lawtuber" turned Dabbleverse streamer, swinger, "whitebread ass nigga", snuffs animals for fun, visits 🇯🇲 BBC resorts. Legally a cuckold who lost his license to practice law. Wife's bod worth $50. The normies even know.

[feral cat #6385]

I had to deal with this when my literally, actually paranoid schizophrenic father in law forgot to take his meds. Anytime he forgot to take his meds and had an episode, he would call CPS and tell them I sold my children into satanic sex slavery, and told them to "check the secret tunnel behind his refrigerator." Even though it is literally schizophrenic ramblings, they still had to send someone out to my house and ask "hey can you just bring your kids out here real quick so I can close this case out?"

How long did it take you to fish them out of the secret tunnel behind your refrigerator?

 

[AltisticRight]

Okay but to play devil's advocate, we have no idea if anyone found anything those times, and CPS is required to investigate literally every call they get.

I had to deal with this when my literally, actually paranoid schizophrenic father in law forgot to take his meds. Anytime he forgot to take his meds and had an episode, he would call CPS and tell them I sold my children into satanic sex slavery, and told them to "check the secret tunnel behind his refrigerator." Even though it is literally schizophrenic ramblings, they still had to send someone out to my house and ask "hey can you just bring your kids out here real quick so I can close this case out?"

>So Balldo pope, we received this call saying you have a secret tunnel behind your refrigerator, where are you kids?
>Here's kid #4, she's turning 9 today!
>[sniffles, sobbing, odour smelly.]
>Alright we're going to close this out but just in case, we need to have a look at your fridge
>Do you have a WARRANT you INCEL PRUDE
>Yes we do, *calls up Joshua Moonson and Aleshia Sweep*
>[unintelligible Balldo screeching]
>Opens fridge
>Couple butter dishes, several cans of opened spaghetti-o slop
>Two bags of prepacked hard boiled eggs
>The state of Minnesotan White men
>Let's see if there's any tunnels behind this fridge
>THERE IS?!
>It leads to property next door
>Who's this bound to the St. Andrew's cross, Balldo pope?
>Sir, her name is April Imholte
>What is this device?
>Sir, it's my field kit.
>26.6789g of cocaine cut on the table
>I'm afraid we're arresting you today

 

[Strix454]

I've never understood what any of these podcasts are about, Are they all attempts to be like H3H3 and Tim Pool? Do they get a big audience or are they all like Steel Toe and struggling for views?

Ethan Van Sciver's show these days is boring and very random. Alot of his content is him endlessly feuding with other people like Eric July and Yellow Flash for no good reason at all. He will talk about news when news is going on. But mostly these days he just complains about other people or talks to people about complaining about other people. He generally doesn't even try to cover pop culture anymore. Its just four to five hours of mindless nonsense and him attempting to shill merchandise occasionally.

Anna is involved with something called the JACK show. Its basically degenerated into a show for the Ethan Van Sciver secondary players. They talk for hours about all the important stuff going on with Ethan Van Sciver. Anna talks alot about herself. They used to do alot of dumb degenerate content, but I'm not even sure if they do that anymore. There used to be four of them, but one of them was kicked off the show for not loving Anna's wedding enough or something.

Shane Davis and his show are also related to these people. He is a degenerate who mostly seems to do content complaining about mainstream superhero comics.

Their audiences are all in a slow decline. All these shows started many years ago as culture complaint shows. But that format is old and tired. They tend to still have the audiences they built up in those years. They are gaining no new audience and the existing audience is slowly walking away out of bordom.

Many (but not all) of these people's reasons for having channels was selling comics they made to their audience. That used to be one of the main parts of the show format. But Ethan Van Sciver is lazy and doesn't really want to do comics. Jon Malin was disinterested in making comics as well but solved his problem by hiring people to make his comics for him.

And oh do you mean Anna Nicole Smith? I don't think I ever knew she did porn! I just thought she became a thing after the Guess ads and was just "around."

I'm not sure she did "porn" in the current sense of the word. She was a 9th-gradel dropout married to a frycook in houston who was also a dropout. She became a stripper. Then she got discovered and heavily promoted by playboy which led to the fashion contracts.

And since this is a law thread, I'll describe the case she was involved in.

During her stripper career she met a guy in his upper 80s who owned 16% of Koch Industries (oil). When he was 89 and on his last legs, she married him. She wasn't mentioned in his will and she didn't have any luck trying to get at his money in the Texas courts.

So then (to bring this back to legal stuff which vaguely gets back toward Nick) she declared bankruptcy in California and attempted to use the bankruptcy court in California to litigate her claims to the estate in Texas.

The LA bankruptcy court, being (IMO) incredibly and openly corrupt, awarded her the entire estate of around half a billion dollars. The Texas probate court then reaffirmed that she was entitled to nothing AND that she should pay legal costs of the other relatives.

Then it went to federal court in California where there was another extremely strange decision that decided she deserved $88 million dollars rather than the entire estate. Then it went to the court of appeals in the 9th circuit which put an end to the case by finding that the federal courts do not have the power to override the probate decisions of individual states.

Then it went to the supreme court then years after her "husbands" death. The supreme court decided that the federal courts do have jurisdiction over the decisions of state probate courts in the matter of a widow debtor's claim of tortious interference with a gift.

Then all of the original people involved in the case on both sides died. Other relatives continued the case on one side and Anna Nicole's sleazy lawyer continued the case on the other side in the name of her daughter.

Then the case went back to the 9th circuit. Then it went back (again) to the Supreme Court in 2011. The Supreme court then decided that bankruptcy judges - because of the nature of their appointment - are not judges under the Article III of the constitution sense of a judge. Thus a bankruptcy court does not have powers to decide legal issues outside of a bankruptcy itself. That a bankruptcy court cannot override the decisions of a state probate court.

 

[AltisticRight]

Ethan Van Sciver's show these days is boring and very random.

Maybe his multi-hour-long streams can be better used drawing those fucking stupid frogs.

 

[Himedall All-seeing Waifu]

How long did it take you to fish them out of the secret tunnel behind your refrigerator?

>So Balldo pope, we received this call saying you have a secret tunnel behind your refrigerator, where are you kids?
>Here's kid #4, she's turning 9 today!
>[sniffles, sobbing, odour smelly.]
>Alright we're going to close this out but just in case, we need to have a look at your fridge
>Do you have a WARRANT you INCEL PRUDE
>Yes we do, *calls up Joshua Moonson and Aleshia Sweep*
>[unintelligible Balldo screeching]
>Opens fridge
>Couple butter dishes, several cans of opened spaghetti-o slop
>Two bags of prepacked hard boiled eggs
>The state of Minnesotan White men
>Let's see if there's any tunnels behind this fridge
>THERE IS?!
>It leads to property next door
>Who's this bound to the St. Andrew's cross, Balldo pope?
>Sir, her name is April Imholte
>What is this device?
>Sir, it's my field kit.
>26.6789g of cocaine cut on the table
>I'm afraid we're arresting you today

I am ASHAMED that no one made the obvious Nazi joke:

(German Accent): You are hiding ze children behind ze refrigerator, ahnt you, Herr Balldo? You like to ze zem squeeshed in ze tiny places, ja? Like wee leetle testicles in a vice!

 

[Friend of Dorothy Parker]

I know about Jenna Jameson. I couldn't pick her out of a line up of whores, but I remember her name was all over the mainstream press in the early days of the internet.

Spoiler: Interesting times

Ooh, how did I forget her? She's semi-mainstream-known, what with the famous boyfriends (Tommy Lee, Marilyn Manson) ages ago, and a quick search tells me she still gets coverage now and then, mostly for hot mess personal life. [I think I saw her a few years ago on TikTok or some other place losing like 80 pounds, and a quick Google now revealed all the marriages/baby daddies (and non-baby-mamas), full sleeves, massive alcohol issues, lost custody of twins with ufc fighter daddy, another baby, several broken engagements, huge weight gain, mystery illness, wheelchair/ walker, terminal prognosis, cleaned up and ketoed down, married some TikTok famous barber lady, now maybe annuling or divorcing, idk.]

[You know, when I was younger I really wanted an "interesting" life. Then I got a taste of it, in that real-or-pseudo Chinese curse sense of "interesting". I'm cured now. Never experienced anything quite like what I just read of Jameson's personal adventures, but I'm going to say that there is some truth about flying too close to the sun.

Jameson's life looks like she couldn't tell the sun from the earth. Nick might relate.]

case she was involved in

Spoiler: Skip if nocurr

Thanks, good summary. Recalling that now. And Howard K. Stern was the creepo lawyer (also named on first birth certificate as father of her daughter, which he was not; Zsa Zsa Gabor's grifter ex also claimed paternity; it was a circus). Everyone associated with ANS was just really off. Even her actual baby daddy ("model, actor, and photographer") seemed kind of weird, though it appears he's turned out not malignantly weird and been an exceptional single father to their daughter, having sued for confirmation of paternity, winning, and then mostly quietly living in Kentucky for the last 13 years with the only real public thing being attending the Derby together every year. Kid's 17 & thinking about college now, not allowed to have a SM presence, pretty wholesome-seeming. I choose to believe, mostly.

Nick connection for the tangent: ANS's kid's name is Dannielynn, same kind of mashed up name Nick's girls have.

 

[DuranceVile]

How long did it take you to fish them out of the secret tunnel behind your refrigerator?

Spoiler: Is this your dad?

Maybe his multi-hour-long streams can be better used drawing those fucking stupid frogs.

I wonder how many streamers are like DSP, addicted to the dopamine hit of seeing superchats roll in. EVS also seems like a malignant narcissist who loves having a platform to talk shit to his flying monkeys about perceived slights.

A friend messaged me this morning asking how Rekieta managed to miss Baldwin's dismissal, an assassination attempt, and the Trump documents case getting thrown out. I told him there were lots of 11 PM piano recitals he had to not attend due to not being allowed access to his kids.

 

[Long-time Lurker]

Anna talks alot about herself.
...
one of them was kicked off the show for not loving Anna's wedding enough or something.

Despite my lack of surprise, I smirked.

And since this is a law thread

Oblig. "This was never a law thread."

 

[Sharpeteer]

Since Rekieta is the Trump 'n Guns streamer, lets see his stream covering Trump's assassination attempt:



Last YouTube stream - 2 weeks ago.
Last Rumble stream - 13 days ago.

Oh nevermind.

Ooh, how did I forget [Jenna Jameson]? She's semi-mainstream-known, what with the famous boyfriends (Tommy Lee, Marilyn Manson) ages ago, and a quick search tells me she still gets coverage now and then, mostly for hot mess personal life. [I think I saw her a few years ago on TikTok or some other place losing like 80 pounds, and a quick Google now revealed all the marriages/baby daddies (and non-baby-mamas), full sleeves, massive alcohol issues, lost custody of twins with ufc fighter daddy, another baby, several broken engagements, huge weight gain, mystery illness, wheelchair/ walker, terminal prognosis, cleaned up and ketoed down, married some TikTok famous barber lady, now maybe annuling or divorcing, idk.]

[You know, when I was younger I really wanted an "interesting" life. Then I got a taste of it, in that real-or-pseudo Chinese curse sense of "interesting". I'm cured now. Never experienced anything quite like what I just read of Jameson's personal adventures, but I'm going to say that there is some truth about flying too close to the sun.

That all just sounds horrible. Where does one go so wrong.

 

[A Cardboard Box]

How long did it take you to fish them out of the secret tunnel behind your refrigerator?

Joke's on them. The secret tunnel is behind the deep freeze, not the refrigerator.

 

[Himedall All-seeing Waifu]

A friend messaged me this morning asking how Rekieta managed to miss Baldwin's dismissal, an assassination attempt, and the Trump documents case getting thrown out. I told him there were lots of 11 PM piano recitals he had to not attend due to not being allowed access to his kids.

Balldo keeps taking L's. He's missing historic political and legal happenings.

I want him yo stream so we can watch the seethe.

 

[Angry Crustacean]

Balldo keeps taking L's. He's missing historic political and legal happenings.

I want him yo stream so we can watch the seethe.

"Baldwin was getting screwed by the government, HE'S LITERALLY ME! Somebody shot at Trump, HE'S LITERALLY ME! Boogie is a gross manipulative narcissist, HE'S LITER-"

 

[Major]

That all just sounds horrible. Where does one go so wrong.

Their teenage years usually. Hormone poisoning

 

[Darkholme's Dungeon]

(German Accent): You are hiding ze children behind ze refrigerator, ahnt you, Herr Balldo? You like to ze zem squeeshed in ze tiny places, ja? Like wee leetle testicles in a vice!

I'm more surprised the following jokes weren't made:
1) Degenerates like Nick belong in a Buchenwald. (Not sure if he gets a pink, black, or yellow triangle lmao)
2) (Die Einsatzgruppen ist die) Endlösung der balldofrage
3) Degenerate "art"
4) Nick getting sued by the EPA for his home being a superfund site.

Joke's on them. The secret tunnel is behind the deep freeze, not the refrigerator.

An alcoholic (self-professed) Jew with secret tunnels. Where's the child sacrifice ritual taking place then?

 

[Mike Stoklasas Spock Ears]

Twin Cities Tattoo Festival was yesterday. Balldo has followed three new tattoo artists on IG who were all in attendance so there is a pretty good chance he went.

Wonder if he finally finished that snake? Or maybe April got some tattoos from her tattoo pinterest board done?



ETA: It’s looking likely, new additions to April’s pinterest from three days ago. Insert “inside you there are two wolves” joke here.

 

[St. Alia of the Knife]

ETA: It’s looking likely, new additions to April’s pinterest from three days ago. Insert “inside you there are two wolves” joke here.

OMG noooo. This is like the white trashiest of white trash shiet, even more so than Nick's shitty take on a Gadsden snake. Why do people with the worst artistic taste in the world insist on shitting up their bodies. FFS.

 

[Major]

I bet they'll get matching tattoos as a trashy wedding ring substitute

 

[SFWA Person of Interest]

Why do people with the worst artistic taste in the world insist on shitting up their bodies. FFS.

In most cases (perhaps all), tattoos are just an expression of a consumer mindset. You are not producing works; you are becoming someone else's work in order to extend your own identity, somehow.

 

[St. Alia of the Knife]

I bet they'll get matching tattoos as a trashy wedding ring substitute

Or... maybe they will get the wedding ring tattoos! I have seen some particularly shitty tats that people have done on their ring fingers to mimic a band.

 

[Mike Stoklasas Spock Ears]

What did he mean by this?

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