Megathread The Pooner Zoo - A thread for collecting wild Pooners and posting OC Pooners, and anything Pooner related

[PigFarm]

Pee pooner is hilarious. Her other posts are asking what a "male mannerism is" while also whining that her headboard is too glittery and feminine. Never mind the plushie collection she proudly shows off. Everyone knows dudely dudes collect stuffed animals long into their adulthood.

I'm not a very feminine lass but for fucks sake, every single one of these pooners is 100x more feminine and girl brained than me. It's astounding. I blame the autism that they all seem to have

 

[سلیمان عثمان]

 

[Coo Coo Bird]

She is a Harlequin romance novelist. Very typical job for a young father.

The most depressing thing I've read today is that there are Harlequin novels written by pooners about enbies getting involved in throuples.

---

Little pooner wants to be a Kiwi! No, not like that:

People who have changed their name to a "Non-Name" / Archive

I know there's a lot of light-hearted ribbing in ftm nonbinary circles about naming yourself a (seemingly) random four letter word pertaining to nature or an object... My name is Kiwi, it came from a random joke that I can't even fully remember from when I was in middle school, became a screen name, then, when I realized I was trans, my real name IRL.
I feel like it's worth noting that I tend to pass as male since I've been on hormones (which is a surprise to me, but I'm totally fine with it) so it tends to raise a lot of eyebrows when I tell them my name is Kiwi. At work and school the response is always "Really? That's your real legal name?" and I of course say "Yep, sure is." because I owe no one anything, lying to cis people for my own comfort should be a sport (/lh) yada yada... and I am always met with some form of well-meaning but irritating "What, did your mom just *really* like Kiwis or something?" or "There has to be some sort of story there" and I *guess* there is but I don't feel like disclosing my transness to every single person I meet five seconds after meeting them. But I'm never going to lie and revert back to my deadname, simple as that.
So now I'm looking at getting a legal name change, because I'm sick of seeing a name that I don't use anymore all over my official paperwork, threatening to out me at work. Again, totally wild to me that people meet me, see me, hear my name is Kiwi, and still don't know I'm trans, but it is what it is. I have feelings of doubt, however, on changing my name to something so "strange", I suppose, and I wanted to hear some feedback from anyone who has changed their name to something that is like..."not actually" a name (like a *word*) and not just an *unusual* name.
I have picked out a middle name which is uncommon but undeniably masculine that I wouldn't mind going by too (Orion), but that then raises the question of "Should I just change my name to Orion and have Kiwi as a nickname?" but that would mean still having to alert people that I wanted to be called something strange instead of what they initially perceive as my name on paper. I get a wee bit of additional anxiety considering my state only allows you to change your name legally once. I would love to hear from the Sticks and Rocks of the world (/absolutely affectionate)

A lot of pooners share their totally manly names:

FTMs-R-Us
Unrelated but I named myself atlas. I do not look like my name at all. I am a noodle white boy twink. People put way too much emphasis on names. Its just something people yell to get your atention or something they'll use to talk about you when you aren't there. You'll never be the only person with that name so realy, is it yours? Idk. Maby im going insane.

rainbowslag
I'm legally named Rainbow and cis people are amazed that "your mom named you that?" and "your parents must be real hippies" meanwhile I'm openly wearing a trans symbol necklace. sometimes they'll compliment it and wonder if I like Prince. I personally love been a man who's named Rainbow and I wish more trans peeps would just do a first name instead of a middle name. like kiwi?! I love that! I love knowing people named after nouns. All this to say, if you love being called kiwi and want to legally be kiwi, be kiwi! names should be fun and honestly not taken super seriously. yeah professionalism blah blah blah, but if that name makes you happy, professionalism be damned. anyway, don't know if that was helpful but I wish you luck in your decision

froglinmoon
I love the name Kiwi!!! I legally changed my name to Moon a few years ago and I have no regrets. It’s the name I feel the most comfy with. I didn’t bother with a middle name. Change it to whatever you feel the most comfy with and if that’s Kiwi then I think that’s awesome.

malewifemichaelmyers
My name is Envy because I really liked Fullmetal Alchemist when I was 14 and I'm 26 now so it's been over a decade of having this as my legal name. I often get reactions when I introduce myself, was asked the same questions of "did you parents really choose that" and "why would they do that to you" but at the same time I had a lot of people of all ages tell me my name was cool.
When I was like 24 I thought about changing it to something more conventional, I had in my mind the idea that I needed to grow up and that it would help me more in life to have a normal name as I was trying to change careers at that point, but at the end of the day no other name felt right and I didn't want to be living some kind of double life where everyone at work only knew me by another name. I love my name and it was a core part of my identity, and it wasn't worth giving that up just to save myself the grief of constant questions. Eventually I just learnt to brush it off, when people ask about my name I go yeah it's unusual and move on and most people just follow my lead. I used to be insecure when I introduced myself, I'd be like haha yeah it's such a weird name idk why I picked it, but over time I became more confident about it and now I can't imagine anything else.
Also it's worth saying that unusual names are not just a trans thing, even in primary school I knew kids called Bunny and Raindrop and Ocean because their parents were just hippies, and as an adult I've met cis people called everything from Tuesday to Sorrow to Apple to Riot.

Remember though, it's probably appropriation!

Legal_Injury_5990
Kiwi is a Māori word, do you whakapapa to any Māori ancestry? I’m a Kiwi, as in a New Zealander. The fruit is called ‘kiwi fruit’ not just kiwi here - like passion fruit and dragon fruit) and is named after our national bird because it kind of looks like one. Some people are definitely named after birds here, like Tui and Huia, but it’s commonly girls that get bird names so Kiwi looks like a very feminine name choice to me - you know, as a Kiwi (is this confusing anyone yet?). Although Tui is kind of an old lady name now, since there’s a beer here called Tui now so it’s not used much for babies anymore!
Having said that, I wouldn’t even blink at someone giving Kiwi as their preferred name/nickname because their name was like, Kieran Williams or something. That looks totally normal to me and I don’t think most New Zealanders would think that was weird or offensive, in fact that’s probably the way it would evolve as a nickname here!
I’m guessing you aren’t expecting to run into many New Zealanders, especially Māori, so maybe it doesn’t matter to you, but I thought you might appreciate just knowing how we might interpret it if you did - ie, probably a girls name unless it’s a nickname, possibly with a touch of appropriation unless you have Māori ancestry, in which case it’s totally different!

Another little pooner got there too!

I JUST GOT CALLED STRONG AND “DUDE” IN THE SAME FUCKING HOUR / Archive

i also gained weight so im not so scrawny now hehhehehehe I LIFTED MY BABY BROTHER INTO THE AIR TO PUT HIM ON MY SHOULDERS WITH ONLY A TINY BIT OF DIFFICULTY IM GONNA CRYYYYYYYYY

This one was weird enough that I checked the history to check if it wasn't a troon pretending to be a pooner for whatever reason. But the only other posts on her account are of Call of Duty slash, so she must be a true and honest female:

does anybody else get horny from wearing women’s clothes as a trans man?? / Archive
Have we now progressed into autogyneophiliaphilia?

 

[PigFarm]

I looked up "crying" on r/ftm cause fucking lol

Half the posts are ladies worried that t will make them unable to cry. The other half is pooners crying over fucking everything.

Which is it doods

 

[Larry David's Opera Cape]

Not like it needs to be said but no man would ever think this way. Pooners once again demonstrating just how fembrained they are

Spoiler: Trapped in the Bathroom!

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Bonus pooner:

Spoiler: I’m a real boy 🤥

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Our very manly and stealth pidovehub (trapped in the bathroom) :



She posts a lot about bathing her plushies.

 

[StillSpergingOnTheNet]

The only thing she could pass for is a member of a noname K-pop group. Stealth my ass, the helium squeak voice is in no way a give away either sister.

 

[SomeSpook]

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Dood.... that hairline... Imagine only getting the worst parts of your pooner juice

Why does this "dood" look like a child molester and the child at the same? It's so confusing.

 

[goat sneed]

@Zemblan Physics mentioned, she is out of the hospital after being treated for bipolar type 2, and is staying with a friend. As always, she is once again grifting. She says you should buy her crafts, though she has no idea when she will actually make them and send them to you. She is now without a vehicle as well.

GoFundMe kids are a very common occurence in the trans and genderspecial community, but Azlan in particular has pulled this stunt many, many times. It's always some crying shit too. And she has the gall to e-beg constantly, then claim nobody should have anything negative to say about it.
Here it's doubly annoying because she's trying to act like she's not asking for cash through emotional manipulation. Thankfully, most people can see through the bullshit.

A guy named Clarkson Lawson made a couple videos about her, saying he feels bad for her though also calling her out. He said he would give her any funds that his videos about her generate, if she would be willing to contact him and talk. His videos about her aren't even hateful... not really sure what she's going on about.

I'm fucking dying. She's trying to make a serious tone with that shaky frog voice and swearing with a bad bleep only to end with "please don't send him to me". Azlan absolutely lives in a hugbox which is why she blocks people for questioning any of her bullshit. I would also say she's probably intimidated by any male interaction, even with a gay guy over a phone. Maybe it's because she looks double the fraud that she usually is? And of course she brought up Palestinian orgs like a fucking robot.

By the way, Clarkson is a twink-for-Trump who gets a lot of attention for talking shit about gendies (think Blaire White but without transitioning). He was on a middle ground panel of liberal and conservative gays for Jubilee. One of his more famous TikTok moments was responding to the lesbian enby who was crying because a bartender in a gay bar said "Hello ladies". Here are his videos about Azlan:

 

[Spob]

This is pretty heartbreaking, gotta say

 

[Procrastinhater]

ALICE DO SOMETHING THEY'RE POSTING POONERS AGAIN!!

Our very manly and stealth pidovehub (trapped in the bathroom) :

View attachment 6316104View attachment 6316107

She posts a lot about bathing her plushies.

Oh yeah, totally stealth. Theres just no way anyone would realize this is a crazy woman thats terrified she sounds female when she has to piss, not a chance, image of masculinity.

This is pretty heartbreaking, gotta say
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The locked in Pooner is nightmare fuel, its one of the worst fates imaginable, and all because a psycho gendershit cultist convinced her to take Testosterone so she could grill with the boys, which she clearly couldn't have done anyway, without damaging her endocrine system and risking a stroke.

I amazed its even mentioned, normally anything that hints at the truth behind their Cult they sweep up, just look at how quickly they forgot about Gruffin.
ElephantDick posted a sympathy card on her memorial page and went right back to trying to encourage other delusional young women into the same life destroying mistake.

 

[Monolith]

This is pretty heartbreaking, gotta say
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The locked-in pooner? Someone posted about her a couple months ago, I thought she was dead tbh. Any news?

 

[Procrastinhater]

The locked-in pooner? Someone posted about her a couple months ago, I thought she was dead tbh. Any news?

I don't think we even have a name for her, we only know her from an article and then a medical paper someone posted, she was brought to ER "in an obtunded state" ie unresponsive semi conscious, and by the time she was discovered it was too late for an intervention.
All she could do is move her eyes up and down so she can't even use one of those eye scanner they make for paraplegics like Professor Hawkin used, she's totally fucked.
I don't think we've found a name for her, there was some talk a few days ago in another thread, its going to be really hard to ID her, you'd have to find an account of a Pooner who suddenly went inactive around the time she first appeared, thats if she even had a social media presence.
Its a needle in a hay stack. I'm not saying its beyond doing, this is Kiwi Farms ffs, I've seen people ID'd from bed sheet patterns and light fixtures, but this is going to be a hard one.

 

[Sexual Chocolate]

This is pretty heartbreaking, gotta say

She wanted to get fucked, and now she is.

 

[Adrenochrome Dreams]

Why do they (specifically radical leftists I've found) still give a shit about Covid  so badly? What is the psychology behind it? Is it autism, yet again? I find it insanely creepy.

They miss the authoritarianism.

 

[400x400]

She wanted to get fucked, and now she is.
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You said that like a rapist but I get it.
Maybe you are one. haha

I liked this post until that.

 

[Bloo]

This is pretty heartbreaking, gotta say
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Shit. I do still feel bad, man. I know people will still think “she did that to herself“ but these decisions aren’t made in a vacuum, a lot of these people are severely mentally ill trying to find a fix in some way. HRT is sold like a miracle fix all drug.

 

[Aunt Carol]

This is pretty heartbreaking, gotta say

"Cannot even communicate using an eye tracker device because she can only move her eyes vertically."

Not to sound like a conspiracy theorist, but when Locked-In Pooner was first brought up on KF, I remember people immediately focusing on that specific aspect of the case. It is compelling, but I wonder if that shows where this Tweeter cribbed it from.

(Up and down movements are still something. It'd require another human, but it's a signal she can use with partner-assisted scanning, going down a list of letters over and over or doing the human equivalent of T9 texting. Even "look up if you want to go to Bingo; look down if you want to stay in the TV room" is possible on no training, just a hunch. Other people with locked-in syndrome have communicated with similar amounts of movement left to them.

And, of course, a strong support system.)

All she could do is move her eyes up and down so she can't even use one of those eye scanner they make for paraplegics like Professor Hawkin used, she's totally fucked.

Q.E.D.

I don't think we've found a name for her, there was some talk a few days ago in another thread, its going to be really hard to ID her, you'd have to find an account of a Pooner who suddenly went inactive around the time she first appeared, thats if she even had a social media presence.
Its a needle in a hay stack.

Pshaw, how many pooners can there possibly have been in California in 2023?

I'm being sarcastic, but it wouldn't be unsurprising if someone were fundraising for her, in which case it'd be matching up the campaign and the dates. But it also wouldn't be unsurprising if nobody were fundraising for her, and she's being quietly turned and tube-fed in a nursing home somewhere, a body in a bed for the next couple-four decades.

One bright spot: she presented to the ED after the tPA window closed, but this little article was still written early on in her case (and wasn't interesting enough for long-term follow-up). She's not going to function normally ever again, but it's possible she regained some small movement in year and a half since; even enough head/jaw movement to press a button would make a world of difference in the ability to communicate.

 

[Larry David's Opera Cape]

Pshaw, how many pooners can there possibly have been in California in 2023?

I'm being sarcastic, but it wouldn't be unsurprising if someone were fundraising for her, in which case it'd be matching up the campaign and the dates.

Ma'am, I regret to inform you that- acting on your tip- I have entered a search string that included the keywords "FTM" and "locked in" and discovered that there exists copious amounts of porn on the theme of pooners in chastity belts.

Having said that- even after refining the terms to avoid Islamic content, nothing is turning up so far.

 

[Aunt Carol]

Ma'am, I regret to inform you that- acting on your tip- I have entered a search string that included the keywords "FTM" and "locked in" and discovered that there exists copious amounts of porn on the theme of pooners in chastity belts.

Having said that- even after refining the terms to avoid Islamic content, nothing is turning up so far.

Great minds! I looked at everyone on GoFundMe who came up for "locked in" plus USA and wasn't obviously a grandpa/grandma/cis scum from the thumbnail, but their search function is atrocious and someone could easily have set up a fund without using the term.

I fear that her friends won't have known enough of the medical situation--or indeed, what happened at all when she went dark--and her family may not be interested in publicizing things. It may well be that all we have for a smoking gun is a week of vagueposts on Tumblr about how someone's friend's family is transphobic.

 

[Hepativore]

One bright spot: she presented to the ED after the tPA window closed, but this little article was still written early on in her case (and wasn't interesting enough for long-term follow-up). She's not going to function normally ever again, but it's possible she regained some small movement in year and a half since; even enough head/jaw movement to press a button would make a world of difference in the ability to communicate.

Realistically, though with something like this, I cannot imagine what sort of quality of life she would have. I mean, it probably would have been better if she died from the stroke. At the very least, I think that she would probably look into assisted suicide.