حلال Connor Bible - Everyone's Favorite Molly Ringwald loving, adoption hating, aspiring writer and bellybutton fucker

[Smutley]

W-.. what's this? Part 17?

Connor should mail his ideas to HBO and Showtime, I'm sure they'd appreciate them

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They say a single bullet can change the course of history. Looks like they were right.

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According this post, Connor failed his HSAP testing 4 times. If I did my math right, out of the 367 students tested in 2012, 18.5% failed the math portion, which means Connor was one of 67 students in his class who did so. Obviously his parents are upset, because his failing means they won't have 4 more years to abuse him over grades.

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Well well well, isn't THIS interesting...

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I've always had suspicions of Connor's laziness, but I think I've finally gotten enough content that I can start comparing it. Just like the pen-pal posts, Connor will copy/paste other things between forums when he isn't getting attention. Here is a Janus City Roleplaying thread

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God damn he's a dummy

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Connor's short story Hi There, Kiyoko has already been posted before. But that's okay, this one is a much better version

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There is some comfort in knowing his criminal stupidity and lead-like denisity is honestly who he is and not some act he's affecting to annoy us

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Note he says "couples". So long as you're a sad infertile virgin like he is, you're safe.

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Maybe I was wrong about Wrong Planet. Connor is so egotistical that he thinks everyone there knows him (Hmm!), and the other users are starting to call him out on his shitty behavior.

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Well no shit, Sherlock

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[EI 903]

So he actually admitted RE was a fanfic. Interesting to see that.

 

[Dalish]

W-.. what's this? Part 17?

Connor should mail his ideas to HBO and Showtime, I'm sure they'd appreciate them

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View attachment 15225

I mean, reading this I finally understand the group of people that he bases his entire view of the human race on:

(incidentally, the show has already been made and he's a little late to the show)

 

[Abby]

What's with Connor and Detroit? Does he really think its some cesspool of crime and decadence? I've lived in Detroit for a number of years and it sounds like he bases all his assumptions about the city on some lame jokes he half-heard once.

 

[Ronald Gaygun]

What's with Connor and Detroit? Does he really think its some cesspool of crime and decadence? I've lived in Detroit for a number of years and it sounds like he bases all his assumptions about the city on some lame jokes he half-heard once.

He's mentioned he's a Verhoeven fan before. He probably thinks Robocop is a documentary.

 

[Foulmouth]

What's with Connor and Detroit? Does he really think its some cesspool of crime and decadence? I've lived in Detroit for a number of years and it sounds like he bases all his assumptions about the city on some lame jokes he half-heard once.

Its just lolcow logic, like marijan and his thing for truckers.

 

[Hat]

Did Connor ever reply to Inyanook after being called out by him?

Also:

The adoptive parents, played by James Woods and Molly Ringwald, ruin everyone's day every episode, doing stuff like raping and murdering Wolf's girlfriend ON CAMERA, stuffing kilos of cocaine in his locker, hiring gay strippers for their biological daughter's seventh birthday party, and at the end of the opening credits, pointing guns at their kids heads during a family photo. The humor is pitch black, with a lot of blue.

Which one of these "black and blue comedy" gags is not like the others?

 

[Cosmos]

I mean, reading this I finally understand the group of people that he bases his entire view of the human race on:

View attachment 15239

(incidentally, the show has already been made and he's a little late to the show)

I was just about to make a post about this! Whenever he mentions his idea for show/book/whatever where all of the characters are narcissistic, selfish, immoral, egotistical, horrible assholes I'm just like "Don't you mean It's Always Sunny? Because that's been around since 2005, dude."

Speaking of which, how amazing is It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia? This new season has been killer so far. It's amazing that a show that's been on for 10 seasons can still be so fresh and hilarious! Oh, sorry, I got a little carried away talking about a work that's actually good instead of talking about Redesigning Eva.

 

[MarineTrainedTard]

It's Always Sunny is amazing, but I'm super-behind. I've only seen up to season 7 cuz I didn't have a TV while I was in school. Gonna have to pick up the newer DVDs soon.

On topic, uhh.... shit, I got nothing. Connor should listen to people's advice and stop being shitty.

 

[Cosmos]

It's Always Sunny is amazing, but I'm super-behind. I've only seen up to season 7 cuz I didn't have a TV while I was in school. Gonna have to pick up the newer DVDs soon.

On topic, uhh.... shit, I got nothing. Connor should listen to people's advice and stop being shitty.

Please do! Like I said before, it's just incredible how It's Always Sunny has managed to stay so fresh after almost 10 years on the air. Even if one episode is a bit weak, the next one is usually amazing so there aren't really any low points.

On topic: Connor, watch It's Always Sunny if you want to see pessimism and depravity done right. The key is keeping your audience emotionally invested enough in your characters while still making it clear what horrible, awful people they are. Too much cynicism and your audience has no reason to care and, by extension, keep watching. Also, don't let your characters get away with everything; don't be afraid to punish them because they probably deserve it. When your band of assholes is punished for being awful, the audience can get a good laugh out of it.

 

[Smutley]

Well, here's a comic that sums Connor up perfectly

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[Hat]

Do we have anything on Connor's political beliefs. All I can find are a couple of things in his "favorites" section of his Facebook page.

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[Meowthkip]

Whenever that quote appears as the randomly generated quote at the top of the page I always try to go to a new page as fast as possible. That description seriously makes me want to vomit.

Honestly I think it's the most evocative thing he's ever written. Terrifying, really.

Can someone explain to me what's with autistics and their obsession with honesty? It goes beyond lack of filter, and gets into "filters are evil and immoral" territory. Connor's high-functioning and I'm going to cut him some slack with the general laziness thing because I think it's partly due to his age, but this whole "I WILL NOT WEAR A MASK" deal is what's really going to wreck him in life.

Aspies are not very good at lying.

 

[TM Ambrose]

Did Connor call Detroit an island?

 

[Fredegunde]

By the way, throughout this thread I've somehow missed out on a very vital piece of information: what's Connor majoring in, anyway?

If it's English I'm going to roll on the floor like an epileptic ferret.

 

[The Knife]

By the way, throughout this thread I've somehow missed out on a very vital piece of information: what's Connor majoring in, anyway?

If it's English I'm going to roll on the floor like an epileptic ferret.

He's undeclared. Been in school two semesters and only taken two classes: an abnormal psych and the infamous maths class.

 

[TM Ambrose]

According this post, Connor failed his HSAP testing 4 times. If I did my math right, out of the 367 students tested in 2012, 18.5% failed the math portion, which means Connor was one of 67 students in his class who did so. Obviously his parents are upset, because his failing means they won't have 4 more years to abuse him over grades.

As a person who has taken the HSAP and passed it will all 4's in my second year of high school I can honestly say that the only way to fail the test is to have a major learning disability along with being slightly exceptional. Also if you don't pass it doesn't speak highly of your grades in other classes. This probably indicates that Connor didn't qualify for the SC scholarship (hope or something... forgot which one) that requires a 3.0 which means he probably has his parents paying for him to go to one class.

 

[Smutley]

Part 18 of Connor Bibles Big Adventures in Autism!

For the briefest of moments Connor shows himself to be semi-self aware. But don't worry, it passes like a fart in the wind

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Okay, remember The Cycle? Connor was gone from Wrong Planet for a VERY LONG TIME* but he's back now, everyone line up to suck his cock

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*long time is 6 days

In an unrelated thread

Okay I want to talk about this for just a second. Wrong Planet isn't a small community, and the fact he thinks everyone knows him is egotistical beyond belief. In the spoiler below is a screen cap from a forum moderator who posted some stats, since they try really hard to hide information on their site and it's userbase. He says that 120 members responded to his poll and that equals out to be 18% of their userbase, which means Connor, back in 2013, was one 666 members on the site. If he's known for anything, it's being a shithead who keeps starting fights.

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All that joking about reading comprehension turns out not to be a joke after all

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Even though Connor has written multiple times how much he hates AbsoluteWrite and how mean all the members are, he once again cross-posts between the sites because he's mega lazy (big screen cap post)

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Unless Connor has actually finished Less Than Zero by this point, he's a straight up liar.

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I've lost track of how many times Connor has said his trademark LOL XD MONKEY CHEESE LEL LE RANDOM ACCESS HUMOR stuff but it's starting to get fucking tiring

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Yet another "My parents abuse me" post. But we've seen enough of them we can start to break out some telling details

• As time goes on his parents "psychopathic" abuse has become worse
• His dad no longer pointed the gun at his head in the truck, he just showed it to him and dry fired in the drive way
• They didn't tell him to "shut the fuck up", just to shut up
• Connor claims to have told Social Services, even though he's said before he's too scared to and doesn't know how
• There's the claim that his parents showed "no remorse or empathy" for his suicide, despite getting pissed that they did just that
• Connor has no idea what his dad does for a living

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God I'm so glad I posted that rant up above because I then found this. Normally I try to be respectful about this but lol, here's Connor's second failed suicide attempt. Note how his evil, awful, abusive, psychotic, worthless, sociopathic, pill-popping, remorseless, alcoholic parents keep "barging in [his] fucking room" to make sure he's okay. Just like abusive monsters without empathy for his previous suicide attempt

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But don't worry! Two days after trying to hang himself with a belt in the little boys room, Connor is back to talking about Molly Ringwald

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This post is absolutely fucking amazing. Holy shit he is literally begging people to do his writing for him.

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"Y'all should know me by now, but don't worry I've matured"

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[sparklemilhouse]

According this post, Connor failed his HSAP testing 4 times. If I did my math right, out of the 367 students tested in 2012, 18.5% failed the math portion, which means Connor was one of 67 students in his class who did so. Obviously his parents are upset, because his failing means they won't have 4 more years to abuse him over grades.

I assume he was mainstreamed since he had to take the standards of learning?

Also does his mom call black people "trash" or is that Connors pet name for black people?

 

[Cosmos]

Part 18 of Connor Bibles Big Adventures in Autism!

After 18 parts, these posts are starting to become physically painful to read. Especially the one where he's literally begging people to write his Godzilla fanfic for him. Just... ugh.