DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell - General Discussion

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This part also just cracks me up. Phil is paying for Pet Health Insurance for Jasper every month.
It sounds more like a savings account except they keep some of the money you put in it if you ever need it so they can pay themselves for providing this service to you.
Like, just open a fucking savings account yourself, call it your Cat Surgery Emergency Account, and cut out the middle man.
I know I'm being :optimistic: What's next? Do I expect Phil to open some kind of savings account for all these unexpected yet routine "y'know, STUFF!!!" that keeps disrupting his finances, like some kind of Rainy Day Fund or something?
Timestamped @ 30m20s
It's similar to medical insurance for human beings. You pay a certain amount a month and depending on what you pay a certain percentage of the cost of care for the animal is reimbursed after filing a claim, sometimes after a flat amount is covered by the owner.

If Phil is true to form he got the bargain-basement level for Jasper just like his own insurance. For comparison's sake, with the company I use, he'd be paying about $15 a month and the only coverage Jasper would have is for catastrophic accidents, some illnesses, and cancer. Fine, I guess, considering how Phil framed it in the circumstance of something disastrous happening, but it doesn't cover anything that leads to problems down the road, like dental cleanings, and I guaran-fucking-tee Phil is not brushing Jasper's teeth or has ever once thought about bringing him in to have it done. Again, considering Phil's approach to his own heath and the fact that he utterly lacks the capacity to consider another living being's needs before his own.
 
This part also just cracks me up. Phil is paying for Pet Health Insurance for Jasper every month.
It sounds more like a savings account except they keep some of the money you put in it if you ever need it so they can pay themselves for providing this service to you.
Like, just open a fucking savings account yourself, call it your Cat Surgery Emergency Account, and cut out the middle man.
I know I'm being :optimistic: What's next? Do I expect Phil to open some kind of savings account for all these unexpected yet routine "y'know, STUFF!!!" that keeps disrupting his finances, like some kind of Rainy Day Fund or something?
Timestamped @ 30m20s
Phil's inability to budget like a machoor adult is one of the funniest failings about him. Even your average kid can save up their lawnmowing money to buy a pack of pokemon cards.
I love how Phil thinks budgeting means
This month's budget
4000$ groceries
4000$ bills
8000$ gatcha pulls
and if he doesn't make enough money to match this he's in the red and is going to literally starve and he needs your money to help pay his bills he really does.

It's incredible how Phil's "I TOLD YOU TO TIP NOT CHEER, WHY DON'T YOU LISTEN TO MEEEE?" shtick hasn't turned off more of his fans. Not only because of the shamelessness and lack of respect he shows his audience even while they're giving him money, but why does he need the money immediately? Tips are the easiest chargebacks, so why does he prefer them? Also he knows when he gets paid by Twitch, so it's easier to budget around that. It's almost like tips go straight towards frivolous spending, and when he's demanding cash from his paypigs to buy food with, he's really going to spend it on something silly and slightly gay like pictures of sweaty men in speedos.
 
Will the chargeback saga ever end?
Seriously, I see no end in sight. I can't imagine a resolution.
He's tried everything, dood. Turning off tip messages, not allowing anonymous tips; But the problem persists: He's still greedy.
He is openly lying about the chargebacks now. Chargebacks have replaced taxes as the eternal blackhole of begging. He has to show zero evidence of chargebacks, so he can just pretend he got another $100 in chargebacks "right before the stream". He can then complain that he is starting out in the red and he needs that money.

It never ceases to amaze how a grown "mature adult" spends his days guilt tripping mentally ill and handicapped people to part with some of their tugboat to help him buy ingredients for tuna casserole.
 
Will the chargeback saga ever end?
Seriously, I see no end in sight. I can't imagine a resolution.
He's tried everything, dood. Turning off tip messages, not allowing anonymous tips; But the problem persists: He's still greedy.
It can't go too long before even the chairs start to wonder how it is he isn't losing the condo with allegedly no money coming in.
It's similar to medical insurance for human beings. You pay a certain amount a month and depending on what you pay a certain percentage of the cost of care for the animal is reimbursed after filing a claim, sometimes after a flat amount is covered by the owner.
Pet med stuff ain't cheap - as in a couple thousand dollars real quick (well, here anyway) - and you know he got a plan with a couple thousand deductible thinking he's saving money each month.
 
He is openly lying about the chargebacks now. Chargebacks have replaced taxes as the eternal blackhole of begging. He has to show zero evidence of chargebacks, so he can just pretend he got another $100 in chargebacks "right before the stream". He can then complain that he is starting out in the red and he needs that money.

It never ceases to amaze how a grown "mature adult" spends his days guilt tripping mentally ill and handicapped people to part with some of their tugboat to help him buy ingredients for tuna casserole.
He legit said on the Genshin Impact prestream HALF of his September tips were charged back.
 
Being the psychopath that I am, and of course Phil's streams are of such quality, I can only watch his streams in short bursts before my existence melts away from absolute jealousy, but I'm really wondering how much he gets from cheers nowadays (@actually god rest his soul, for he made this so much easier to theorize on).

It has to be a pretty significant amount since at the times I am able to stand his streams, cheers (although small) are always flying in left and right (I mean, him ignoring stream chat on purpose isn't a meme for nothing, watch his CoD streams and the only way to get his attention is with money attached). That adds up quick. Looking back at the previous monthly roundups, on average the bits/tips ratio in dollars came out to about 3 dollars in tips for every dollar in cheers. I suspect that ratio has had to have closed in on each other over the last few months.

Him still promoting tips might actually be an accidental stroke of genius now with the chargebegging as I believe he gets a lot more pity cheers from it as well. Couple that with the fact that the only tangible on-stream financial evidence we have is the tips goal. For cheers it's only the top cheerer. Obfuscating even more about his earnings and giving more legitimacy to his (feigned) financial distress.
 
Being the psychopath that I am, and of course Phil's streams are of such quality, I can only watch his streams in short bursts before my existence melts away from absolute jealousy, but I'm really wondering how much he gets from cheers nowadays (@actually god rest his soul, for he made this so much easier to theorize on).

If someone is willing to provide consistently formatted logs that either have the raw header information or split out legitimate cheers (meaning that someone typing "cheer10000000000" doesn't get counted), I would be happy to modify the script I have to tally it up.
 
It's similar to medical insurance for human beings. You pay a certain amount a month and depending on what you pay a certain percentage of the cost of care for the animal is reimbursed after filing a claim, sometimes after a flat amount is covered by the owner.

If Phil is true to form he got the bargain-basement level for Jasper just like his own insurance. For comparison's sake, with the company I use, he'd be paying about $15 a month and the only coverage Jasper would have is for catastrophic accidents, some illnesses, and cancer. Fine, I guess, considering how Phil framed it in the circumstance of something disastrous happening, but it doesn't cover anything that leads to problems down the road, like dental cleanings, and I guaran-fucking-tee Phil is not brushing Jasper's teeth or has ever once thought about bringing him in to have it done. Again, considering Phil's approach to his own heath and the fact that he utterly lacks the capacity to consider another living being's needs before his own.

It would be supremely ironic if the only things Phil's pet insurance covers are incidents that would require euthanizing the cat anyway.

I would not put it past Dave to assume vets work like Pokemon Centers.
 
DSPs eyesight must be terrible. We kinda knew this, but explain this video holy fuck. He really should wear his prescription glasses all the time.


in motion



He didnt see this

1603206153100.png
 
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40yr old prioritising a playstation over groceries
No you nudnik dumb kid detractor. He needs that Playstation for his job. He can't make any money at all unless if he buys a PS5 the day it comes out. God you are so stupid. He should take you outside and just best the shit out of you. Like he used to do in his Street Fighter days. Like that game he still plays weekly and makes money.
 
No you nudnik dumb kid detractor. He needs that Playstation for his job. He can't make any money at all unless if he buys a PS5 the day it comes out. God you are so stupid. He should take you outside and just best the shit out of you. Like he used to do in his Street Fighter days. Like that game he still plays weekly and makes money.
Sometimes I have to really think about what's scummier, the fact the Pigroach thinks he's entitled to write off these consoles as a business expense or the fact the IRS is too lazy to just go "hey waitaminute we have to talk about some of these deductions".
 
Sometimes I have to really think about what's scummier, the fact the Pigroach thinks he's entitled to write off these consoles as a business expense or the fact the IRS is too lazy to just go "hey waitaminute we have to talk about some of these deductions".
You know, I always partially wonder if thats why he got into Youtube. Sure he is the stupidest bastard alive. But he did go to business school, and even he can formulate a plan. In fact. I wouldnt be surprised if his Best Buy PS2s weren't going to be written off. I have an accountant friend who is like "Yeah I can cheat taxes all day long. Its not even hard. But, thats why I also work for the state..."

So rate me optimistic, but I'm guessing thats why he did it initially.
 
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