12/11/13 - Consider Me Dead

[Some JERK]

One interesting aspect of this whole situation is that because Chris is almost entirely immune to emotional change, he genuinely does not grasp that these are not the same girls that he knew in high school. They've been out in the world working, forging (and likely losing some) relationships, and generally growing as people. They're grown women now. Not wide-eyed, optimistic teenaged girls. A few of them are someone's mother at this point.

Its bizzare to watch him try to interact with (guilt trip) people who no longer exist.

 

[Descent]

Doesn't he always? I'm surprised he didn't expect to crash Sarah Hammer's wedding to steal her from Spicer.

Well, according to "My Best Friend's Cherokian Wedding", Chris "had" Megan at the time, so I'm sure in his head he thought he was "letting Sarah go" since he already had Sailor Megtune.

Whatever you can say about any violent tendencies he may or may not have isn't the important point. The important point is that getting a weapon and going on a spree are things that require a lot of effort, and Chris's mind always has a light at the end of that infinite tunnel of shit he lives in - the light being, maybe someone else will do it. Therefore, even if he wanted to he'd wait forever for it to be done for him.

...Chris really is stupid enough to expect someone else to do his killing sprees for him isn't he.

Actually, that'd make an interesting twist in a crime drama. Just as the police are about to arrest the red haired mormon girl for shooting up the local Manchester High School and Game Place, THIRD ACT REVEAL! It turns out the reclusive man baby was behind the whole thing. Hog-timing ensues.

 

[EzioCanLeapofFaith]

Funny, how after knowing what his gal-pals thought of him, he is still planning on doing the reunion thing.
And even if the reunion did manage to happen, I'm sure none of the gal-pals will go if Chris will be there.

 

[Count groudon]

Man, Chris has been so pissy lately. He's probably just mad cause they wouldn't give him seconds down at the soup kitchen

 

[butt in trouble]

Funny, how after knowing what his gal-pals thought of him, he is still planning on doing the reunion thing.
And even if the reunion did manage to happen, I'm sure none of the gal-pals will go if Chris will be there.

He definitely expects them to show up.

Chris always believes the people he obsesses over obsess over him too.

 

[BALLZ-BROKEN]

Come on Chris, give in and become a goth!, Chris should write more Poetry, he should call one of his poems, DIRTY CRAPPED WORLD.

GOING GOTH IS EXPENSIVE! You gotta buy the black vinyl pants, and the fishnet shirts, and the hair dye..

And no one wants to see Chris in vinyl pants

 

[CWC Tok]

Wouldn't be hilarious if during the reunion (assuming anyone even shows up) all of Chris' classmates ignored him because they're suppose to consider Chris dead?

Reminds me of that episode of South Park where everyone pretends Cartman is dead. And Chris would probably believe he was a ghost, too--he's an actual human being who's more egotistical and self-absorbed than Cartman, if that's possible.

 

[Dreamatorium]

I hate to be that guy here but god damn, Chris needs 1. weed and 2. leave his house, preferably for good, and see the world

 

[4Macie]

Wouldn't be hilarious if during the reunion (assuming anyone even shows up) all of Chris' classmates ignored him because they're suppose to consider Chris dead?

Reminds me of that episode of South Park where everyone pretends Cartman is dead. And Chris would probably believe he was a ghost, too--he's an actual human being who's more egotistical and self-absorbed than Cartman, if that's possible.

I think if Chris went to his reunion (assuming it even happens) and no one pays attention to him (likely) then he'd just rage silently about it while he was there and then rage to the world online (maybe even while he was there, who knows with his new iphone). I do not believe that Chris is dumb enough, or even egotistical enough, to truly believe he's a ghost because no one talks to him. Besides that, no one that goes would be that unsociable that they'd blatantly ignore Chris if he went up to them and said 'Hi'. I would pay to be a fly on the wall during the reunion though because you KNOW crazy shit is going to go down. Either Chris will just pout in a corner, or he'll try and converse with others and then they'll have that awkward "I don't want to be here" vibe going on and it'll make everything super awkward for everyone BUT Chris. I truly believe he wouldn't even realize the person he was talking at didn't want to be there (hey, he missed that all of highschool) and then after the reunion he would gush all over facebook about how wonderful it was that he got to meet and talk with REAL people at the reunion.

 

[Seahorses]

I hate to be that guy here but god damn, Chris needs 1. weed and 2. leave his house, preferably for good, and see the world

You know what Chris thinks about tobacky. What do you think he would think about your first proposition?

 

[Foulmouth]

I hate to be that guy here but god damn, Chris needs 1. weed and 2. leave his house, preferably for good, and see the world

You know what Chris thinks about tobacky. What do you think he would think about your first proposition?

Weed makes food and Vidya more enjoyable so I think he'd be a big time pothead if he tried it.

 

[Butta Face Lopez]

So do you imagine Chris trying to get pot as more of a Buster from Arrested Development situation, or Dennis and Dee from Always Sunny buy crack situation?

 

[Foulmouth]

I imagine he'd get sold a whole lot of Oregano, maybe some parsley on a good day.

 

[fuzzypickles]

I imagine he'd get sold a whole lot of Oregano, maybe some parsley on a good day.

Perhaps rosemary and thyme on an even better day.

 

[Hyperion]

Pot is being considered as an Autism treatment. Then again its being considered to treat just about anything.

We all know the Chandler family rule on treating Autism.

 

[Foulmouth]

Pot is being considered as an Autism treatment. Then again its being considered to treat just about anything.

We all know the Chandler family rule on treating Autism.

Pot is a really good cure for notbeingstonedism.

 

[CatParty]

"I'm not a creep" says Chris in a creep like email

 

[CWCissey]

Come on Chris, give in and become a goth!, Chris should write more Poetry, he should call one of his poems, DIRTY CRAPPED WORLD.

He should totally go full Morrissey...

 

[Hyperion]

Pot actually is being considered as an Autism treatment. We need to see what these people do Stoned. There is a small chance we can interact with them normally.

 

[GFYS]

A car or van is probably the best way to kill a lot of people quickly and indiscriminately. He had both. Luckily, I think he lacks the determination to carry out any plan that requires more effort and time than dragging his chubby fingers across an iPhone screen, eat some nuggets, and pooping himself.

Reunion scams are big business, I'm kind of surprised he hasn't fallen for any yet.