Are you lost needing femoid advice post here - For the poor bastard's who dare or are just curious

[Big Miss Steak]

And what would you consider sexism?

In a very broad sense, I think sexism is considering someone as worth less than you based solely on their sex. I think a component of this is believing that someone should fit into neat boxes of behaviors and interests based solely on their sex and being put off when they don't. A drastic example of this would be denying someone a raise or job based solely on their sex (and no, that is not the same as saying women should be working on oil rigs). A minor example of this would be going, "Oh, erm, hmmm. That bothered you?? Really? Interesting...." when I tell you that it annoyed me that a woman brought her unruly 3 year old to our co-ed Bible study and the leader decreed that the women would henceforth take turns babysitting the kid in a separate room. I'm not going to lose my temper at you over it, I probably won't even say anything, but I will notice and not like it. Which is fine. Plenty of women, especially Christian women, who love being around kids at any opportunity.

There's obviously a certain line where a woman becomes masculine and a man becomes feminine, but there's quite the difference between frowning at a man in makeup and a dress, and a man who likes houseplants.

 

[NoReturn]

when I tell you that it annoyed me that a woman brought her unruly 3 year old to our co-ed Bible study and the leader decreed that the women would henceforth take turns babysitting the kid in a separate room.

Lame.
One word response, but that is super lame.

 

[Shidoen]

I don’t even know what kind of solution you can find for brining your kid to church other than just have a daycare with someone who teaches them simple Bible lessons and let’s them mess around in a playground. Kids cannot handle an adult church session or Bible study and that’s just the truth.

 

[Friend of Dorothy Parker]

a woman brought her unruly 3 year old to our co-ed Bible study and the leader decreed that the women would henceforth take turns babysitting the kid in a separate room. I'm not going to lose my temper at you over it, I probably won't even say anything, but I will notice and not like it.

You do realize that even "not liking" this is a "feminist" perspective, right? The leader deemed it a women's problem to solve. Objecting to that presumptive sex-based treatment and set of assumptions - whether say so or not - is feminism.

 

[Napoleon III]

I was going to write a shitpost but I couldn't think of anything so I will ask a semi-serious question. How important are things like careers and full independence to any of the women whom'st are here? I probably already know the answer to that question but I'm curious.

Okay I know this might be a controversial question, but in your personal opinion if let's say a man was sexually abused or raped by someone during their childhood or even somewhere later in life as an adult is he tainted in your mind? Is he forever defiled and perverted because technically his mind and body aren't that of a virgin due to his circumstances? Because I know for a fact if somebody said this kind of things about a woman like you said about men, this kind of question would pop up and if the answer to this question was "Yes", let's say this thread would turn into a massive dumpster fire.

The answer is Yes though. It's not a good or happy thing but there are negative consequences when bad things happen. Something being cruel and unfair doesn't make it untrue.

You certainly don’t “earn” a relationship. That implies that after putting in x amount of effort, you are owed one, like a paycheck. It also implies that people with more “earning power,” like money or looks, are owed their successes while those without such things are not only guaranteed to fail but deserve to fail. This is not only untrue but it is also a very self-damaging perspective.

Ok two things Relationships are living things and they have the ability to die if either party lets them die. Putting in the effort is what keeps it alive.

Also someone deserving something in a meritocratic/power sense is not the same as some deserving it an a moral sense.

 

[Big Miss Steak]

You do realize that even "not liking" this is a "feminist" perspective, right? The leader deemed it a women's problem to solve. Objecting to that presumptive sex-based treatment and set of assumptions - whether say so or not - is feminism.

Agreeing with feminism on one point does not make me a feminist, just like thinking Biden is a corrupt retard wouldn't make me a Republican. I will leave it at that since I don't want to sidetrack the thread.

 

[NoReturn]

I was going to write a shitpost but I couldn't think of anything so I will ask a semi-serious question. How important are things like careers and full independence to any of the women whom'st are here? I probably already know the answer to that question but I'm curious.

For me or in a partner? For myself, career is less important than the independence part.

When I was younger I wanted a "career" but as I got older I realized what I actually wanted were the things I believed a career would afford me. i.e. A roof over my head; food in my kitchen; water in my plumbing; and a comfortable, safe place to live and sleep. I can get these things with "jobs", I can get that with "gigs", the only determining factor is how much I bring home. The prestige of a career is less important than I thought it would be when I was a young woman.

 

[Taxidermied Rat]

How important are things like careers and full independence to any of the women whom'st are here?

In terms of what I expect of my man? I would say the attitude he has is more important. If he is in a rough spot and can't get either, that's fine. But he should be striving for independence(from his parents, not sure what else you would mean), and searching for a job that makes him fulfilled. He doesn't need a career, but he also can't "work" writing a "book" for a decade.

In terms of what I expect of myself, I desire and work hard for both. The American dream is real and I plan to work as hard as possible to give as much as possible for my children.

 

[Great General Ri Shin]

Have any Femkiwis got experience with postpartum depression or psychosis? I’ve seen it referenced here and there online and the idea of it frightens me quite a bit. Any condition that could compel an otherwise normal mother to harm or neglect her own newborn children must be terrible indeed. How can it be recognized early, and how is it normally treated? Thanks in advance.
Sorry if this is kind of off-topic, I’ll remove it if asked.

 

[Friend of Dorothy Parker]

Agreeing with feminism on one point does not make me a feminist, just like thinking Biden is a corrupt retard wouldn't make me a Republican. I will leave it at that since I don't want to sidetrack the thread.

Sure, I guess. But you have feminism to thank for the ease with which you had the thought you had.

And the "one point" on which you agreed with feminism is the essence of it.

 

[Big Miss Steak]

I was going to write a shitpost but I couldn't think of anything so I will ask a semi-serious question. How important are things like careers and full independence to any of the women whom'st are here? I probably already know the answer to that question but I'm curious.

Depends. I know that is a copout answer, but it's true. Women generally want a man who can be a provider, but this desire can be very flexible if the woman is lonely or has a low standard of living. Having a career and decent finances will always be more attractive than not.

Have any Femkiwis got experience with postpartum depression or psychosis? I’ve seen it referenced here and there online and the idea of it frightens me quite a bit. Any condition that could compel an otherwise normal mother to harm or neglect her own newborn children must be terrible indeed. How can it be recognized early, and how is it normally treated? Thanks in advance.
Sorry if this is kind of off-topic, I’ll remove it if asked.

Postpartum psychosis is kinda rare. It's very real, but your average women isn't going to start hearing voices or drown her infant after giving birth. Postpartum depression, we are learning, is not so rare. For a long time it was believed that these women were just weenies who couldn't cope with being a mom. Now we know that it's something related to their body failing to chemically adjust to no longer being pregnant. Could take months or years. It goes unrecognized a lot because family and friends will tell the mother she is just tired, or stressed, or whatever.

Baby blues (which can be more serious depression than the name implies) are normal and last for around a month while your hormones go through a big adjustment and your body heals. Fathers can have it too, not brought on by the birth obviously, but brought on by the emotional/psychological burden of having a baby, especially first time dads.

My mom had a mental breakdown while pregnant with one of my siblings and had postpartum depression for a few months after the birth. Said sibling is utterly insane.

 

[umami's milk]

thank for the ease with which you had the thought you had.

fucking kek

 

[Justa Grata Honoria]

I was going to write a shitpost but I couldn't think of anything so I will ask a semi-serious question. How important are things like careers and full independence to any of the women whom'st are here? I probably already know the answer to that question but I'm curious.

It terms of the man career not so much but making money yes. Having your own house and not relying on parents very important. Anything less was a waste of time for me. I wanted kids that's it.

 

[NoReturn]

It terms of the man career not so much but making money yes. Having your own house and not relying on parents very important. Anything less was a waste of time for me. I wanted kids that's it.

You know, that's a very good point. I feel like every woman should be planning her life around whether or not she wants kids. It shouldn't be an afterthought, since it affects everything in your life whether you have them or not.

 

[Justa Grata Honoria]

You know, that's a very good point. I feel like every woman should be planning her life around whether or not she wants kids. It shouldn't be an afterthought, since it affects everything in your life whether you have them or not.

. Problem is when women change their minds about kids refuse to change their dating patterns and think they can do all. They are literally one bad pregnancy away from bancrupcy or burning out. Pregnancy takes out a lot of womans body and nobody wants to admit it because hurr durr in ancient times women gave birth and kept working the fields. The thing is they also had downseason wheither or not is dry season or winter where they spend every year few months doing basically fuck all where your body has time to recover. And the men did more harder jobs . But hey details .

 

[TapewormSalesman]

The thing is they also had downseason wheither or not is dry season or winter where they spend every year few months doing basically fuck all where your body has time to recover

They had lots of help in the form of at the very least grandparents of one from the couple. You stick the kid in the kitchen with grammy/grandpa and go work the field, or grammy milks the cow while the kid milks you. Since now in the West the multigenerational household is almost dead and grandparents are generally getting older and older, as each generation has kids later and later, a very big source of help for mothers is lost.

 

[doodoocaca]

Two queries for the helpful femoid from an inquiring moid:

1) How do you get women to discuss feelings in way that is not an attack, but instead seeks to actually find some way to fix a problem or deal with the emotions?

2) How do you get western(ized?) women to actually care about men as emotional beings, beyond regulating ones they do not wish to interact with or observe?

 

[Not a bee]

Have any Femkiwis got experience with postpartum depression or psychosis? I’ve seen it referenced here and there online and the idea of it frightens me quite a bit. Any condition that could compel an otherwise normal mother to harm or neglect her own newborn children must be terrible indeed. How can it be recognized early, and how is it normally treated? Thanks in advance.
Sorry if this is kind of off-topic, I’ll remove it if asked.

Sadly with the psychosis part you can't really tell until after birth. Your docs will give you questionnaires to see how you are doing mentally and such. I recently gave birth and I thought I was losing it mentally because I was hallucinating my baby being in my arms when he wasn't, seeing him in his bassinett when he was actually in my husband's arms, or hearing him cry when he wasn't crying, but it was apparantely from lack of sleep, stress, and major life change. Your hormones will fuck with you too mentally so it is important to keep track of that. After a few weeks your hormones will calm down (it will take months though) and once you get a schedule going with your baby your mind and body will calm down too. Stress is a big factor.

For how they are treated (Kiwis please correct me if I am wrong) they will give you medication and possible hormonal therapy. If you have thoughts of hurting yourself or your baby (or have strange delusions like your baby is the antichrist) you will be temporarily separated from your baby. I remember my doctor telling me that at the hospital because I asked the same question you did.
PPP and PPD is temporarily and not lifelong.

 

[Law]

I'm thinking about breaking up with my boyfriend.

Relationships are supposed to make you happy. If yours doesn't, you're allowed to leave. You don't need to earn the right to leave by giving him a set number of second chances or a chance to get back on his feet.

I work and study full time and do most of the chores

He's stealing your time. If he valued your time and life he wouldn't make you waste it by doing chores while he relaxes and futzes around. If he gets an unpaid maid (you), he's not going to break up with you even if the relationship turns miserable (then he'd have to lose his precious free time to chores), so you need to drop the axe yourself. Get your time back.
Having another able-bodied adult in the house should lead to a lighter load, not a heavier one.

 

[Justa Grata Honoria]

Two queries for the helpful femoid from an inquiring moid:

1) How do you get women to discuss feelings in way that is not an attack, but instead seeks to actually find some way to fix a problem or deal with the emotions?

2) How do you get western(ized?) women to actually care about men as emotional beings, beyond regulating ones they do not wish to interact with or observe?

by not hating them like you do and screeching repeal the 19th now btfo you incel go ask your buddy incels. Or better yet neck yourself.