Karl Jobst / karljobst / FAQ_GOD / simthreat / approachhernow.com - Albino autist, Spergy speed runner, Pickup predator and Bitch of Mitchell

[Exit fullscreen button]

To be fair, if he truly did have his lolyers look over the video, they probably told him to change some shit, so it minimizes the risk of him getting slapped with another lawsuit, or offending the bias (sic) judge.
Trvst the plan.

 

[Sharpeteer]

Firstly, no updates for all his viewers on YouTube on any of these delays, and that he "can finish the vid tomorrow." His Discord hugbox gets all the updates though.

Additionally, I found this funny - as of today, his community post now has more comments than likes.


Ratio'ed, bish.

 

[prolapsed_cranium]

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Karl promises the video tomorrow™. So much for it "being ready, just needs lawyer approval"

He's speed running Nick Rekieta

"Soon"

 

[PauperVita]

To be fair, if he truly did have his lolyers look over the video, they probably told him to change some shit, so it minimizes the risk of him getting slapped with another lawsuit, or offending the bias (sic) judge.
Trvst the plan.

Then he would say “my lawyers suggested some changes” etc. and I’m not sure they would take long to make. Dude is a fucking liar.

 

[Minion Facebook Memes]

Update on the hot sauce I ordered!

I got the habanero sauce, since I don't much care for the flavor of jalapenos. I'm no hot sauce aficionado anyway, so take this as coming from a white woman who thinks black pepper is 'spicy'. I'm having the sauce on some chicken tenders and potato wedges from a local deli.

At first the vinegar and lime juice are strong and there is a somewhat hot kick from the peppers, but it's hardly melt-your-face-off hot. Then I can really taste the garlic, and there's a very smoky quality to it. The heat lingers, but again isn't really all that hot, in my opinion. I think this will definitely hit the spot when I'm craving something a little hot though. All in all I enjoy it! I think I would personally prefer if the lime wasn't quite so prominent, I feel like there has to be something else more savory to balance out the acidity maybe? But either way, not at all a bad sauce.

 

[Gobermental Supervisor]

Karl's thread turning in the "Billy's hot sauce review thread" adds a special layer of spicy burn to Karl's humiliation.

 

[PauperVita]

It’s the funniest part of reading the thread because you know Karl is reading it.

 

[The Noise]

It’s the funniest part of reading the thread because you know Karl is reading it.

I'm checking the Take That Off The God Damn Internet! board every day to see if he's sent any nastygrams to Null accusing him of libel yet

 

[AnOminous]

It’s the funniest part of reading the thread because you know Karl is reading it.

Karl? Literally who? I thought this was the Billy Mitchell hot sauce thread.

 

[PauperVita]

That’s WORLD RECORD HOLDER Billy Mitchell

 

[Sharpeteer]

I've downloaded every video Karl has made on Billy Mitchell, because something tells me they're going to disappear at some point - look how many he's made, and look at these titles:


Some of these have aged so hilariously poorly, and looking at them, I wonder why the judge might think Karl is aggravating.

Karl? Literally who? I thought this was the Billy Mitchell hot sauce thread.

That's correct.

 

[Totes Retar]

Here's his previous forum usernames if needed, least he had some manners here:

But not here:

(those were two years ago but still)

Spoiler: Somewhat Nice Karl comes to Virginia to meet up with his Eliter friends for fun and games

My epic sexiness however... definitely should give me special privileges. Especially when it comes to choosing who I get to share my bed with

The self still on point, sod it.








I kind of wish it did for real.


Yes he said that twice in response to gas costs for the meet.

Karl wanted to host his own GoldenEye competition there (special privileges?) with $250 as a cash prize:




(one fucking sitting?)






Smashing:




His recap of the entire meet:

No, stalker.

That keeps popping up, either trying to play nice or being unusually smug.



But not an absolute legend? Only an absolute legend like our Yobst could act like this:



Holy sweet tits:


With special privileges when it comes to streaming:


And this and that:


And... oh, would you look at that:

Spoiler: More religion shit

Is he illiterate? He's 26 here and he still couldn't type for crap.

Karl's "pretty epic" relationship advice out of nowhere while discussing new WRs:


Shitting on Goose:






Karl's grand speech:

I was ashamed that I had wasted so much time playing a game that will ultimately give me nothing in return.

For the last 6 years I have been intentially learning about myself. Learning how to do better socially, better with women, better with my emotions, better in business, and better in understanding my self.

I believe this is what set him off to write that wall of text:




I would tell you to "man up" and that your ego should've shut up a long time ago but, to put not just the current predicament into consideration, is that possible anymore? Well, you'll always have your Discord tranny hugbox.

the classic 'K..' style of 2002

lol?????

I dont claim to be mauture in every 2nd post just because some girl cheated on me. However anyone who has met know im just fucking around on the boards. The fact that you took my post seriously is a fucking joke.

Something something jokes on them I was only pretending to be retarded.

Retard.







What the fuck, so he made this thread in 2012 but someone else bumped it years later and he still responded?


I thought there would be a lot more to this. Still, why?

Spoiler: Putting this here instead of the very top; an Eliter shares his near-death experience on ecstasy

In response to:

You know it, Goose.

---

Spoiler: Other 2010-2012 highlights

I thought the usage of "noob" ("n00b" in this case) waned down at this point in time?






On cheating, with the suggestion of a punishment system:

those who dont think cheaters should be banned (at least for a period of time) should grow the fuck up.

1. 2001
2. 2002
3. 2004-2006
4. 2007
5. 2008
6. 2009

 

[Sharpeteer]

Here's his previous forum usernames if needed, least he had some manners here:

I appreciate all the information, but could you please use more spoiler tags? These take a long time to scroll through otherwise.

 

[Totes Retar]

I appreciate all the information, but could you please use more spoiler tags? These take a long time to scroll through otherwise.

That is what I plan to do next time, I actually wanted to here but I lost track of time and had to sloppily organize everything as a result.
And again, Karl couldn't shut his ego, so there's still gotta be a few highlights for me to cover that isn't long and under any spoiler tags.

 

[Gunslinger Spawn]

Holy sweet tits:

He ain't getting any of that from his wife

 

[Opposite of a Winner]

Karl's thread turning in the "Billy's hot sauce review thread" adds a special layer of spicy burn to Karl's humiliation.

Speaking of hot sauce. Got mine in right after work today. Trying a spoon full my mind immediately went "This would go GREAT with wings." It tastes good, it smells good, and it has a decent burn.
I give it 3/10 for pouring in the eyes, even to repent for siding with speed trannies hot sauce in the eyes suck. And I give it 8/10 for taste. Wouldn't say it's quite worth $10+ for shipping and all that but that's my opinion, honestly not a bad hot sauce. Just really wish I had wings because I could see it tasting really good with wings.

*Edit: Forgot to mention but I got the "normal" hot sauce. Not the jalapeno nor the habanero.

 

[DickMain]

He's speed running Nick Rekieta

"Soon"

"Some of the things I can't tell you guys right now, you're not even going to believe it when you find out. "

 

[neger psykolog]

Here's his previous forum usernames if needed, least he had some manners here:
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But not here:
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View attachment 7219142 (those were two years ago but still)
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Spoiler: Somewhat Nice Karl comes to Virginia to meet up with his Eliter friends for fun and games

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The self still on point, sod it.
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I kind of wish it did for real.
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Yes he said that twice in response to gas costs for the meet.

Karl wanted to host his own GoldenEye competition there (special privileges?) with $250 as a cash prize:
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(one fucking sitting?)
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Smashing:
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His recap of the entire meet:
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No, stalker.
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That keeps popping up, either trying to play nice or being unusually smug.
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But not an absolute legend? Only an absolute legend like our Yobst could act like this:
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Holy sweet tits:
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With special privileges when it comes to streaming:
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And this and that:
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And... oh, would you look at that:
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Spoiler: More religion shit

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Is he illiterate? He's 26 here and he still couldn't type for crap.

Karl's "pretty epic" relationship advice out of nowhere while discussing new WRs:
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Shitting on Goose:
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Karl's grand speech:
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I believe this is what set him off to write that wall of text:
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I would tell you to "man up" and that your ego should've shut up a long time ago but, to put not just the current predicament into consideration, is that possible anymore? Well, you'll always have your Discord tranny hugbox.
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lol?????

Something something jokes on them I was only pretending to be retarded.
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Retard.

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What the fuck, so he made this thread in 2012 but someone else bumped it years later and he still responded?
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I thought there would be a lot more to this. Still, why?

Spoiler: Putting this here instead of the very top; an Eliter shares his near-death experience on ecstasy

In response to:
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You know it, Goose.

---

Spoiler: Other 2010-2012 highlights

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I thought the usage of "noob" ("n00b" in this case) waned down at this point in time?
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On cheating, with the suggestion of a punishment system:
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1. 2001
2. 2002
3. 2004-2006
4. 2007
5. 2008
6. 2009

Just imagine we gave up this for fucking twitter. I'm not bothered to read Jobst's forum posts but they were at least more than 160 characters.

 

[Princess Rescuer]

Speedrunning is a fast (heh) way to stop caring about your favorite games. When I discovered that skip in World Court Tennis that skipped all the bosses and cut the game in half, my reaction was "Wow! I discovered a big skip! I leveled up as a speedrunner!" shortly followed by "One of my favorite games isn't fun anymore". That's one reason it's good to not be too attached to one game. No wonder people on a site dedicated to two games go so insane.

 

[Sargon's wife's son]

I love how Billy is just mocking jobs where they're literally on Twitter how much is life is terrible .

He should take the words of the most base black man and kill himself