Orbiter Kat Speculation - With guest appearances by her sister, Jenna

[Kosher Dill]

I just want the divorce saga to start because it's the only interesting story arc left that could break Phil

Divorce won't break Phil. Losing the condo won't break him. Moving back in with his parents and working at McDonalds won't even break him.
Getting banned from Scopely will.

 

[Exceptional Chimp]

Divorce won't break Phil. Losing the condo won't break him. Moving back in with his parents and working at McDonalds won't even break him.
Getting banned from Scopely will.

I don't know... LET'S FIND OUT!

 

[King Daddy Telomerase]

Divorce won't break Phil. Losing the condo won't break him. Moving back in with his parents and working at McDonalds won't even break him.
Getting banned from Scopely will.

I don't think so, Phil would just play another game to flash the money he burns. Even Phil knows it's only a matter of time before WWE Champions either dies or makes all the many thousands he spent irrelevant.

 

[Freshtodeath]

I think he'd be okay with divorce he would just say it's what mature adults do. Losing the condo would be significant because that is his whole world. The condo allows him to not get a job and hide from the world. He can also brag that he is a mature adult with a home and bills.

 

[Iron Father]

Divorce would crush his ego. Losing Leanna certainly did, imagine what losing a wife would do. He couldn't even stay married long enough for it to outlive his parents who are apparently constantly on death's door?

That said, I think a 'Divorced Pig' arc would be pretty entertaining. I don't know the details of divorce law in his state but the idea of Kat and Jasper getting the condo and DSP having to move into a tiny bachelor pad apartment somewhere sounds like sitcom gold.

In all reality he'd probably get even more unhealthy and end up hospitalized.

 

[Super Dent Head]

Divorce would crush his ego. Losing Leanna certainly did, imagine what losing a wife would do. He couldn't even stay married long enough for it to outlive his parents who are apparently constantly on death's door?

That said, I think a 'Divorced Pig' arc would be pretty entertaining. I don't know the details of divorce law in his state but the idea of Kat and Jasper getting the condo and DSP having to move into a tiny bachelor pad apartment somewhere sounds like sitcom gold.

In all reality he'd probably get even more unhealthy and end up hospitalized.

Due to Phil having the snort fort before marriage, it's extremely unlikely that Kat would get that in the divorce. I think the only way that could happen is if Phil is sent to live in assisted care - But even then, Kat would likely sell the place anyway.

I think they've been married long enough, however, that Kat would receive a portion, up to 50% of Phil's shit. Phil losing things would probably cause him to meltdown on it's own. Add that to the fact that Phil can't cook for himself and showers once a month, he'd become a ticking time bomb for some disease to eat him alive. Then Jasper could eat the rest of him (if Kat doesn't get full custody of the cat-son in the divorce).

 

[Fapcop]

The other upside to her just walking away is Phil will forever live in paranoia that she'll change her mind and spill the beans.

Especially after he “tried to set the record straight” with his little “we just grew apart! Age difference!” And the hospital story that Phil tried to spin as “in reality we were already split up! I was just so super kind I let her use the car as a perfect gentleman!”

He’s lucky that Panda is smart enough to keep a low profile and not be even more tied to an embarrassment like him than she already is. For now anyways.

While I’d love to hear what dirt she could dish on him, I’m happy that she managed to move on and did something Phil could never hope to experience: Personal growth.

Divorce would crush his ego. Losing Leanna certainly did, imagine what losing a wife would do. He couldn't even stay married long enough for it to outlive his parents who are apparently constantly on death's door?

That said, I think a 'Divorced Pig' arc would be pretty entertaining. I don't know the details of divorce law in his state but the idea of Kat and Jasper getting the condo and DSP having to move into a tiny bachelor pad apartment somewhere sounds like sitcom gold.

In all reality he'd probably get even more unhealthy and end up hospitalized.

Can you imagine the fucking salt we’d get out of a divorce saga?!

Phil sitting and streaming in what is obviously a cheap motel room, bottles and hats behind him, raging for hours about what an absolute mentally ill shithead the divorce judge is.

It’d be enough to move the NACL prices on the world market.

And he’d of course turn it into the biggest beggathon we’ve ever seen. “So... Alimony payment is due tomorrow and I might go to jail if I don’t pay up, so I REALLY appreciate your tips right now guys!”

*SNORT*

Thumbs at door: “Also my mote-ehm-muh weekly rent is due on Monday so... (SIGHS) I really need that money guys! I really do! Well, enough about me! We got about half an hour left of the Emergency Marathon, so let’s play some Streetfighter!”

I don’t think Phil is smart enough to realize how much his mahture soulmaid marriage can potentially fuck him.

Aside from alimony and losing Fort Snort, Khat can at any time make ONE phone call and not just have Phil kicked out of there, but also get a restraining order from him even coming there, while Jim and Tyrone move in, and have a good hearty laugh over Phil’s weird vests and the gay little grocery cart he has, because he can’t lift a gallon of milk.


EDIT: Whether Khat could make any claim in half of the Wahkando depends on the local laws in WA. While I’m too much of a lazy faggot to look them up right now, I wouldn’t be surprised if they’re to Phils disadvantage.

And aside from that. Phil makes five figures some (almost all) months. The alimony he’d likely pay would be substantial. Especially if he can’t get his wheelchairs to pony up thousands of dollars for a retainer for a half decent divorce attorney.

Wonder if Phil’s imaginary tax attorney also does divorce cases?

 

[Sparkletor 2.0]

Come on people, we saw what happened in the bankruptcy so we know what would happen in a divorce.

Mr. Burnell owns nothing of any value and makes negative $35 a month. Kat owns a PS4 Pro, a computer monitor, and makes $1200 a month.

The judge will order Kat to give Phil the PS4 and pay him $600 in alimony.

 

[Flavius Anthemius]

Come on people, we saw what happened in the bankruptcy so we know what would happen in a divorce.

Mr. Burnell owns nothing of any value and makes negative $35 a month. Kat owns a PS4 Pro, a computer monitor, and makes $1200 a month.

The judge will order Kat to give Phil the PS4 and pay him $600 in alimony.

DSP outlives another one, both his fur covered son and his soul-mare.

Just in regards to recent happenings...

Phil has never ever been considerate about anyone but himself during the entirety of his existence on this planet, we all know the reasons why whenever he has to lift a finger for someone else (taking Kat around to places that she needs to go to in order to earn an income, overexaggerating Jasper's condition and not even showing much concern for him, pinning the blame for his poor contribution performance on YouTube, his fans that give money to him, even dah trolls who are his classic scapegoat in this regard "stealing" his content etc. we could go on forever bringing up selfish close minded wrongdoings throughout his life) he always becomes disinterested and unmotivated regarding anything related to any type of event, like her birthday, maybe even valentines day, and the festive events later on in the year if you wanted to stretch Phil's ultimatum for his gin soaked brain.

However what particularly would surprise me if he was to ever have a complete change in heart in regards to how he sees his relationship with those closest to him, we know with Kat that it's not really an exact two way street between each other, she hardly puts in any effort in regards to being around with Phil at all, and he's very much the same. But what would compel him to shift a significant amount of his life away from his hermit like lifestyle and try to be a better husband to her partner? Would it simply be as something as simple as Kat admitting to Phil that things just aren't working out anymore between them (i.e the money is drying up or Phil hits another money problem and she can tell the tide is turning) or would it be out of fear that Phil is simply not doing enough to satisfy even the minimum amount of care for Kat that she would at least expect and this is what makes Phil suddenly do something to put Kat in more of the spotlight in his life? (or he's just worried about losing his mommy figure again).

When you consider how he's been acting the same way like he always has been on twitter and his streams, I guess you just have to stop and think is their relationship ever going to grow and develop at all that and would we would actually notice a difference? She has almost zero social media presence (she probably has throwaway aliases to hide her activity), she doesn't even show up in Phil's online life in anyway anymore and Phil is not the sort of person to think outside the box when it comes to finding ways about making himself a better partner towards his soul-mare, he did jack shit with Leanna.

However just like a pig in mud, it may be that Phil is perfectly contempt (maybe a little bit hesitant too) about keeping things the way he likes them, he has his mommy figure, to show off that he's a mature adult, and parade about how lucky he is and that he's having a good time and all, but this could all just be a big deflection, and Phil is completely distant about making any sort of progress to having a more stable relationship, because not only would he not know how, but he likes to think that everything is fine between them as things are now.

 

[Cyber Bowling]

Phil put in the barest minimum of effort when Leanna said she was unhappy to try and improve their relationship. And for Phil, putting in the barest minimum amount of effort is about the best you'll ever get. I think he'd be willing to do the same if he Khet pushed him, but it's hard to say if Khet has any interest in their relationship. I'm inclined to say no. Phil wasn't shy about airing his dirty laundry with Leanna, so I can't imagine why he'd suddenly go radio silent with Khet. I don't even know if Phil is capable of hiding something, he's awful at it and has so little going on in his life, that if anything happens, he shares it. Plus, if Khet was complaining, I think Phil would be seeking validation from his paypigs, similar to what he did with Leanna. He'd spin a tale about how hard he has to work and how he didn't do anything wrong, just so one paypig agrees with him and he could turn it into "alotta people said I wasn't at fault."

IMO, Khet and Phil are pretty perfect for one another. Not because they make a good couple, but because neither actually wants anything more than security from the other person. Phil gets to pretend he's a mature adult/cool guy for having a wife, and she gets a roof over her head and door dash delivered to her trough. Other then that, they're both hermits with seemingly no ambition besides gaming. ordering food, occasionally watching stuff and walking around the mall once a week. Basically, they've both given up at anything resembling successful lives, but they can use their relationship as a guise to trick themselves into thinking they've made some form of progress.

I was a strong believer that Kat would eventually divorce Phil, but now, I'm not sure. I think she views Phil the same way Phil views streaming. This is just the rest of her life, no matter how bad/sad it is. By her own admission, at least according to Phil, she has no real skills/training and can only hope to amount to basic retail jobs in her life. But, despite admitting this, she hasn't actually tried to do anything to improve herself. If she was taking classes or something while living with Phil, or even trying to start a business like Leanna did, I'd absolutely argue she'd leave once she graduated/her business took off, but, unless Phil is managing to withhold details, all she does is stay home, play games and watch YouTubers.

IMO, Leanna was roughly in the same position, but she saw the writing on the wall and managed to snap out if it before Phil dragged her further down. Maybe it'll happen to Khet, but based on what we know, it feels like she's already settled for mediocrity.

 

[Freshtodeath]

did they end up going to the zoo for kats bday?

 

[Iron Hamster]

Yes..........they've been home the whole time.

 

[QwahlityKahntent]

I was a strong believer that Kat would eventually divorce Phil, but now, I'm not sure. I think she views Phil the same way Phil views streaming.

@Cyber Bowling

maybe. but she has a history of infidelity. i don't think she'll just up and divorce phil out of nowhere, but as soon as she has a better paypig lined up though, she'll jump ship

 

[Fapcop]

@Cyber Bowling

maybe. but she has a history of infidelity. i don't think she'll just up and divorce phil out of nowhere, but as soon as she has a better paypig lined up though, she'll jump ship

I don’t even think it has to be a better paypig, Phil is making 10K a month after all.

(Though the minute that income drops, it’ll obviously be an extra incentive for Khat to split!)

I wouldn’t be surprised if she’d switch him out for someone who makes less, but can offer a normal life.

You know like someone she doesn’t need to be embarrassed about.

Like an assistant manager she can go on vacation with once a year without hearing complaints about “da schedule!”

 

[Crisis Acting Instructor]

If Khet were smart she'd be doing some serious research on Washington state divorce law and formulating an exit plan to maximize the ratio of money she could receive to her time spent legally married to Phil. Based on her past, she could be playing the soulmaid game for now while targeting a more stable partner for the future. Phil has alarmingly bad financial management skills+awful insurance (medical or otherwise)+no real plan for the future of his life or profession. She could probably find a lonely IT professional around Seattle who actually has the skills and wherewithal that Phil sorely lacks, plus he might even own a real non-condo mature adult house!

 

[Kosher Dill]

Based on her past, she could be playing the soulmaid game for now while targeting a more stable partner for the future.

It's fun to game out these sorts of scenarios, but recall that Kathy is quite overweight, minimally employed, and has the personality of wet cardboard. How exactly is she going to attract a "stable partner"? Phil is very likely the best she can do. And it's really not that bad of a deal to get free lodgings with an annoying housemate you only have to see once a week.

 

[DZoomer]

It's fun to game out these sorts of scenarios, but recall that Kathy is quite overweight, minimally employed, and has the personality of wet cardboard. How exactly is she going to attract a "stable partner"? Phil is very likely the best she can do. And it's really not that bad of a deal to get free lodgings with an annoying housemate you only have to see once a week.

I think that Kat is at least smarter than Phil (which isn't saying much, but still). She must understand that she's in a sinking ship. Where will she be in 10 years if she stays with Phil? Definitely not in a better place than she is today. Phil has no savings, no retirement plan, and would need to drastically change his habits in order to be able to retire before his sixties. And we all know that isn't happening.

So I do believe it is likely that she plans to divorce Phil. When? No clue. But I believe she will. She's a gold-digging whore and a cheater, so we all know that if she stands to gain anything from a divorce, it won't be honor or decency that will stop her from doing so.

But maybe I'm overestimating her brains and she is just as dumb as she is boring. If that's the case, well, sucks to be her.

 

[Cyber Bowling]

@Cyber Bowling

maybe. but she has a history of infidelity. i don't think she'll just up and divorce phil out of nowhere, but as soon as she has a better paypig lined up though, she'll jump ship

That was a big reason I assumed they'd end up getting divorced. And I certainly don't think she's loyal. Just lazy. She could potentially line up a better paypig, but that would take effort to find someone new, start talking with them, plan a move, go through a divorce etc. Plus, what if that new paypig wanted to actually spend time with her instead of letting her sit in her room all day playing Skyrim. The more time passes, the harder it'll be her for her to find someone else.

The very, very, very sad truth is, I think this is probably the best Khet has ever had it. It sounds like she's had a few moments of self-reflection, mostly in those job rants we heard third hand from Phil, so who knows how accurate they are. If she was with a halfway decent partner, they'd use that to give her a push to do something more with her life. But Phil probably just asked her if she wanted nuggets or a burger from Doordash. Leanna had work friends to give her that push, and she was also younger, but all Khet has is Skyrim NPCs. And while it certainly isn't impossible to turn your life around when you get older, I think it becomes significantly harder, especially in a situation like Khet's, where you're already so behind the curve.

 

[Kosher Dill]

She must understand that she's in a sinking ship.

Yes, but there simply isn't another ship for her. The smartest play for her is to just ride the SS Phail to the bottom of the ocean and then salvage whatever she can from the wreckage.
Remember that there's equity in the Robust Marinara Adult Condo. She can simply be Phil's roommate, live rent-free till he croaks, inherit the condo, sell it to pay off whatever lingering debts she can't shake, and walk away with a tidy sum.

 

[Reef-Raze]

I've said this in another thread, but Phil has been jumpy lately. He has been looking out the window at every passing car, and going downstairs to greet Kat, even when it was nobody and the house was empty.
He was even saying how she should be back from work by now, but traffic could be holding her up.

These are the behaviors of a guy that suspects his wife of infidelity. If that's true or not isn't even the point, the point is that he absolutely suspects it.