One Wish

[Strawb3rry]

You found a genie and he is going to grant you one wish (due to inflation, three wishes aren't available any more). On the bright side, this wish is guaranteed to be granted exactly how you want it to be, no monkey paw nonsense. You can't wish for more wishes or omnipotence or anything lame like that. What do you wish for and why?

I'd wish for super-speed, like the Flash. I've wanted to travel, so I'd use it to zip around and see the world. I could just wish for teleportation, but running sounds more fun.

 

[twinArmageddons]

a really good hamburger, fries, ketchup, and a drink at a snap of my fingers

 

[We Are The Witches]

How vague, I need to know the limits of this, if omnipotence is forbidden, where is the frontier?

It's also a waste to wish what you did, you would try to add all qualities you can: I want to be quasi-omnipotent, meaning, I am faster than the Flash, stronger than Superman, etc, etc. All in one.

I don't fucking like wish-granting nonsense. How about this, I wish for all of you to disappear.

Now the next poster needs to wish that my wish is negated.

Alternatively, I can wish that all of your wises are negated.

 

[Strawb3rry]

It's also a waste to wish what you did, you would try to add all qualities you can: I want to be quasi-omnipotent, meaning, I am faster than the Flash, stronger than Superman, etc, etc. All in one.

I'm happy with just speed. I'm not planning on taking over the world, I just want to run fast and see the world.

 

[#FF0000]

I wish to be conditionally immortal. I can die and revive whenever I want, so if I'm bored with the world I can just die and then revive in a few years

 

[AndSothisIsChristmas]

One million more genies.

 

[Fascist Frederick]

I'll have a coke.

 

[Toji Suzuhara]

I'd wish to be an anime character, although I like to think that I already am one

 

[We Are The Witches]

I'm happy with just speed. I'm not planning on taking over the world, I just want to run fast and see the world.

I'm not sure how would that work outside of comic books, with a real body.

If you accelerated like the Flash, you'd probably instantly get a brain hemorrhage or displace your organs (amongst a lot of other things, probably go blind as well), so for that to be managed you'd need to properly state your wish.

The Flash needs to have a special super-resistant body too, so as you worded your wish right now, it would not be enough.

I'm looking out for you, if you simply want "super-speed like the Flash" and not a body capable of resisting that speed, you'd probably disintegrate at your fist attempt of trying your new powers. And this is not monkey paw shenanigans. But who knows in the real world what a body like this would be like and what would it entail, I'm just saying.

Spoiler: Attosecond

 

[Evil Whitey]

I would wish for time dilation,

Spoiler

thank you trannies for ruining that word

being able to have as much time as I wanted to solve problems, or to slow down time if I was in danger, fast-forward waiting rooms and elevators, etc.

 

[Core Theorist]

(Gay reddit explanation nonsense)

ok I appreciate reading the analysis but everybody knows this already. Plus, he literally said:

(...)On the bright side, this wish is guaranteed to be granted exactly how you want it to be, no monkey paw nonsense(...)

Doesn't this mean the blatantly magic genie is just gonna handle all that shit?

Anyway, for me and mine I'd want the ability to manipulate causality or maybe 'luck', as an example so I could say "this is actually a winning lottery ticket" and causality changes so it really is a winning lottery ticket retroactively. Could you imagine the brain fuck I could give other people when all of my predictions turn true?

 

[Ultrapenguin]

I'd think "I better not use this wish right now, I'll save it until I really need it" then I'd bank it for later.

But my ability to rewire the fabric of reality a single time would stick with me, and own my thoughts. Every day would be ruled by the constant awareness of my wish. I'd never be able to go to sleep at night without thinking about it. Maybe I should throw it away on something dumb and accept the natural order of things? But imagine how many people in the world would kill to have one wish. It would be insane to throw it away. Better keep it until I'm really sure.

Year after year it would continue, an entire life defined by this one event (esp. since now I know the supernatural exists) that set me apart from normal people. Years going by but never making use of my wish, sure that waiting would be the wise choice.

Eventually I'd become a frail old man, alone and still with my wish. Upon my death bed I'd think "Maybe I should wish to be younger? Or maybe I should wish to not have cancer? I've got to use it or lose it, but I just don't know" and I would pass away in deliberation, my wish never having been spent.

The genie laughs.

 

[Rungle]

Would you rather have 1 wish, or talk to man who did a thousand wishes?

 

[Ed Special]

I'd wish for a giant meteor to crash into the middle of Tel Aviv and annihilate the entire Levant.

 

[Otterly]

Can I wish for more wishes?
If not then I’d wish for really good loves for me and my loved ones. The whole health wealth and happiness stuff.
Or maybe to be vague just that the world would be a better place

 

[Idiotron]

I want the powers of the genie with none of the limitations.

 

[Chunky Salsa]

Whole planet blow up.

 

[Skitarii]

Bring the genie to a priest to be exorcised and destroyed

 

[oldTireWater]

Would the reflexive "kill yourself faggot" be interpreted as a wish?

 

[We Are The Witches]

Doesn't this mean the blatantly magic genie is just gonna handle all that shit?

I don't see that as monkey paw business, because that specification is a major thing/addition to the wish that doesn't neccessarily need to come with speed.

But that's subjective, so it's not like there's a definitive answer.