random_text.txt

[naaaaiiiiillllll!!!]

Used to love running the big ol' Oliver diesel around the dairy farm, spreading manure or harvesting corn silage to feed the moos.

 

[PaladinBoo]

Another one that I find funny from increasingly reviled lolcow Mauler:

"There is no white culture."

He said in his defense of why black people are in the newest God of War which takes place in Norse Mythology.

 

[Disc]

My penis was oscillating between extremely sensitive and borderline traumatized. The last place I wanted to be was Frostnipistan. I’d been trying some home remedies, including one recommended by a friend. She’d urged me to apply Elizabeth Arden cream. My mum used that on her lips. You want me to put that on my todger? It works, Harry. Trust me. I found a tube, and the minute I opened it the smell transported me through time. I felt as if my mother was right there in the room. Then I took a smidge and applied it…down there. “Weird” doesn’t really do the feeling justice.

Eventually, somehow, we made our way back to Monica’s. That is, Courteney’s. It was night. I walked down some stairs to her beachfront and stood with my toes in the ocean, watching the lacy surf come forward, recede, come forward, for what felt like ages. I looked from the water to the sky, back and forth. Then I stared directly at the moon. It was speaking to me. Like the bin and the toilet. What was it saying? That the year ahead would be good. Good how? Something big. Really? Big. Not more of the same? No, something special. Really, Moon? Promise. Please don’t lie to me. I was nearly the age Pa had been when he’d got married, and he’d been considered a tragically late bloomer. At thirty-two he’d been ridiculed for his inability or unwillingness to find a partner. I was staring thirty-two in the face. Something has to change. Please? It will. I opened my mouth to the sky, to the moon. To the future. Aaaah.

Literally nobody ever wanted to hear about Ten Degrees of Kevin Bacon between your dead mom's lips and your frostbite dick.

If we don't have a Prince Harry Quote in Random.txt, at least one of these has to be worth it.

 

[Big Stank Dick Dad]

We're talking about the only vertebrates on the planet that will willingly castrate themselves.

 

[Table Country]

There was a review on the BBC about this and they said it's OMG INCREDIBLE. So as I'm sure we all expect, it's going to suck

American culture is centered around prison showers. They have showers for niggers. They have imprisoned hundreds of thousands of niggers just to bathe them. They listen to shower music. They dress and act like they're ready to hit the showers. They draw the entirety of their modern culture from Lord of the Lockerroom. They post sassy gifs about bathtubs. Their biggest event of the day is getting ready to hit the showers.

I'm moreso just confused as to why his rape will be covered by the British Broadcasting Channel when this takes place in the US.
Unless they are extraditing him to the UK for something.

“You can earn back my follow”. You can kick the bricks, queer

 

[naaaaiiiiillllll!!!]

I've never gotten the vax and I think it's retard juice like null said

HHH and the other liberal bait-posters/paypiggies on suicide watch...

 

[3MMA]

She was there, watching a movie I never watched before. "What you're watching?", I asked nervously. "Breakin' 2: Electric Boogaloo." She was so educated, cultured. I could never compete... no women could.

---

ETA:

I WILL BE US

 

[Idiot Asshole]

too many moob pics. My eyes cry. Please stop with the moobs pics. I beg you.

 

[Meiwaku]

(Warning: Jail has been mentioned on a website that is mostly Americans.)

- Null

Surprisingly the woman who fucks a lifesized Squidward plushie is the most normal person on that sub.

So why is having a waifu bad and "autistic" or "schizo" or whatever you shitbrains say here?

There's fucking nothing wrong with being a waifuist. FUCK THIS WEBSITE. I FINALLY FUCKING MADE THIS ACCOUNT JUST TO SAY IT

your family must be proud to see you being homophobic, and racist on here!

I need a race scientist in here stat to tell me what trisha was before she became a chosen person.

Banning all cars in the far off future could be possible, but hopefully all countries collapse and never recover, then we could restart shit properly like having proper public transport without subcreatures (niggers, jews, etc).

Hello lurking "women". Nigger.

Now onto you lovely bitches. I've petted so many damn cats its unreal. One of the little scamps wanted to climb me. Thought he was a shoulder cat so I leaned forward to offer the shoulder, only for him to look at me like I was an abject retard and climb my chest. I guess chest cats are a thing, or he really approved of my band shirt.

Please just go on my lap or shoulder next time though.

I think that trannies were created by Satan's autistic son.

You know the old saying, “when life gives you 30-50 corpses, make fertilizer “

The dead are the lucky ones, for them the Tranch is over.

 

[Return of the Freaker]

Unconditionally France. Not because they don't have good dishes, but because they are the sodomites of the culinary world.

Woe to you, O daughter of Zion, that has provoked the ire of the paprika-feasters.

I hope Tim gets a BIG BUCK CELLMATE with a HUGE NIGGER COCK who constantly makes smelly tuna sandwiches from commisary food, leaves the tins out to stink up the cell, plays loud music on his radio, and doesn't flush the toilet after taking a shit.

 

[Angry New Ager]

I can't unmountain dew what’s already been mountain done.

 

[PhoBingas]

So the Machine Elves are supposedly racist because they've historically hung out with Latinos. Despite this, they were initially welcoming to this black guy, but on subsequent visits were extremely hostile and racist. We also only have the black guy's word that the first trip was good. I have a sneaking suspicion he tried to pull some nigger bs with them, and the Elves reaction was "Fuck! Hector was right about niggers!". I think we need to hear the Machine Elves' side of the story is what I'm saying.

 

[WolfeTone]

 

[Aunt Carol]

“I’ll have the small labia with a big clitoris and a little uwu fuckhole please!”

 

[Gas Station Boner Pills]

Progressives worship blacks more aggressively and with more reverence than I've ever seen a Christian worship Jesus.

 

[neverendingmidi]

All these new terms is like rebranding pedophile to MAP. There's already terms for transmaxx, it's called the faggot eunuch.

See, it's not hard.

"I don’t know why I should’ve been reluctant to discuss my penis with Pa, or all the gentlemen present. My penis was a matter of public record, and indeed some public curiosity."

The second is another quote from Prince Harry's book.

 

[LurkTrawl]

Very nice 6/10 just zip her inside of a large (very long) full-body magenta sock with two holes cut out of the chest and you've got yourself a great motorboat.

 

[Arianne Chan]

"This place would be cool if there wasn’t so many reactionaries and wignats. Kind of like a Reddit 4chan hybrid."

By @Chaser663

 

[.T.N.U.C]

He prayed to his moms hair during a rough pregnancy moment

 

[Sprate Header]

I made an audiobook of her rape fantasies.