random_text.txt

[Aunt Carol]

She now goes by some retarded sounding name, has a really bad short hair cut, rejects Christ, and owns multiple capes.

 

[RACISM]

The introduction of ass-eating to this thread has not improved it.

 

[LastStableVersion]

Hitler was a gay pedophile with 1 testicle and no testicles and a micropenis and was a jew that was addicted to cocaine and meth and bull semen

 

[Gentlebastard]

I diagnose him with cluster F personality disorder for fat, faggot, and failure. That's just how fat he is, he gets more clusters than regular people.

I now identify as Joe Biden.

*goood....feels nice and lean there Tyrone.....you are going to be perfect my little baby nubian child"

this is the equivalent to him watching a neighbor slowly walk over to his porch, place a rake right in front of his door such that stepping foot outside the door will cause the rake's handle to flip up and smack whoever stepped on it in the face, then after he watches the neighbor leave, opening the door and intentionally stepping on the rake so it smacks him in the face

On an unrelated note, big ups to the many posters in this thread who trawl the trenches of modern social media to bring us this content. Reddit in particular is one of the worst user experiences out of any website on the Internet. We all really appreciate the constant funny posts that would go unseen by Kiwi eyes if not for you!

I've patposted verbally around my girlfriend enough times that she's started to do it too. Eventually all the world's stalker children will be told to enjoy prison, as god intended.

throbbing boner aside,

He has the self awareness of road kill.

ENJOY PURGATORY, CHERUB!

"i'm full of female hormones, of course I'm lady!"
I inject dog scrotum extract into my eyeballs weekly. Woof ruff bark bow wow wow.

 

[Anne Hyroe]

Someone needs to explain how bunny teeth are supposed to be hot. I'm waiting.

 

[JustSomeDong]

I sound like a fucking insane person, but all of this is factual.

 

[UnsufficentBoobage]

IDGAF-SAMA FUCK ME HARDER

 

[Black Man Underwear]

@PlasticOwls

Why would any pedophile want a horse

Kiwi farms hates horses confirmed

@Molly Millions

That explains why theres a youtube video of a horse farting at a dog

@Napoleon Bonerfart

here's the deal it's okay to watch videos of animals farting on things as long as you're laughing and not masturbating

 

[Meat Target]

Please refrain from molesting the millipedes or you will be asked to leave PetSmart. Thank you ma'am.

 

[Thomas Eugene Paris]

It seems that a few of us are enjoying the same thread. I apologize if any of these notable quotables have already made it here.

What holocaust?

How can you say you love her if you only love her for the taste of her rectum?

Your lack of confident language says to me you're full of shit (metaphorically) and coping because you cannot resist the anus of men.

 

[Tablet County]

Dur liber! By my ancestors is nothing sacred?! You dare mock the pineapple heathen?

RETVRN TO FLIPPHONE

New American unit of measurement just dropped: Nuggets per flush

Are you saying I'm an anal nazi?

COVID paranoia is ravaging the OCD community the same way crack cocaine ravaged the black community

keffals - 1

hazbin - 1

kiwifarms - 0

checkmate liberals

Don't forget Linus Tech Tips - 2.

Doctors need to start asking their patients if they like Hazbin Hotel so they can get them pumped full of SSRIs

Have sex is not a valid retort when it comes from a skank who loves to eat ass

 

[Sparkling Yuzu]

clownporn cuntboys

 

[Dead Gay Muppet Gangbang]

Draw the gay negro gangbang or forfeit your last scrap of dignity!

 

[Your Best Friend]

A rascal once texted him “the sky is blue” and he responded “no, stalker. It isn’t”. There’s literally nothing he won’t respond to.

 

[Black Man Underwear]

@BlueKirbo

anyone else rape retards
just me

@Madre Muerte

Retards don't seem fun to rape

 

[AltisticRight]

K is @Bryan Dunn.

 

[SSj_Ness (Yiffed)]

I don't really know what to tell you if bestiality is right on par with a fun opera scene that's integral to the plot. That is some serious coomer logic.

"i cant wait till people start snapping and just killing gays"

 

[Gentlebastard]

You could tell this nigger that breathing is a win for him and he’d use his last breath to choke out “enjoy prison, stalker” before passing on to the big Hooligan’s in the sky

my ex wife ran into Fat on her twitter feed months ago regarding something unrelated and at the time i briefly told her some of the backstory, which she didn't really believe. i recently sent her the guardian article the other day and after about 5 minutes of questions she asked if the guy was a fag. he does exude that energy even to people with almost no exposure to him

It doesn't matter what they are cheering for, he will bask in it like he's covered in mud on a sunny day at the farm.

Good god, that's hideous. Even the dog is judging.

Jesus Christ Junior if you’re gonna grope a woman, do it like a fucking chad. Make that ass quake. Check her oil. Grab an handful . Otherwise she will gossip with her friends that you’re worse than marrying a closeted gay, but rather she married a creep.

I don't consider myself a seether, but I would be lying if I said that this man does not make my blood boil.

This entire thread makes me feel a weird sense of pride switching from free net porn to 3d porn games.

REPEAT AFTER ME: "Niggers are friends, not food. Niggers are friends, not food. Niggers are friends, not food."

Has he ever had a take on any subject that isn't cringe and gay [and fat]?

 

[Dixieland Buckaroo]

LITERALLY SHOVES HIS BALLS INTO A WEIRD LITTLE CAGE AND RAMS IT INTO HIS WIFE

 

[Tablet County]

I think he can relate with Elmo. They both have had people shove things up their behinds

Which is worse, to be the pooper-cattle and have your precious waste stolen away powerlessly (with your consent), or to hunker down and stir last nights diet coke with your very own proboscis?