Megathread The Pooner Zoo - A thread for collecting wild Pooners and posting OC Pooners, and anything Pooner related

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LIL DOOD HUMILIATED BY GIRLFRIEND: RHETORICAL VERSION OF A MK FATALITY

“Wonder what sex with a real penis feels like?!”


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That cold moment when you’re reminded that it IS a LARP. Brutal!

The fellow lil doods stream in to offer the most manliest of support!

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Retarded analogies are offered:
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Along with retarded reassurances:
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“What does it mean hurr-durr?!”

You know exactly what it means sweetheart. It means that you’re LARPing, you’re not a man, and the GF very naturally is wondering whether sex with an actual man feels similar to sex with a woman who’s pretending she’s a man.

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Of course nobody points out that she’s living a lie and unlikely to ever make a heterosexual woman happy and content.

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Whoops… Looks like the OP isn’t the only one with this problem.

Who would have thought there would ever be any problems with LARPing as the opposite sex, and ensnaring an inexperienced bisexual or non-lesbian into a relationship because of social pressure to be “accepting”.

Stick to dating lesbians ladies. This isn’t rocket science.
 
Lmao at all the pooners saying "What's a real thing anyway?", as if they don't know. You can play word games and act like reddit lawyer all you want, reality doesn't care how you label things or how you philosophically define it. At the end of the day, a real penis is a real penis, and everything else is fake. They know it too, that's why they bristle at the suggestion.
The fellow lil doods stream in to offer the most manliest of support!
"Do you think with the right education and information, she can grow from this?"

Translation: "Do you think she's stupid enough to be gaslighted into believing there's no difference between a strap on and a real penis?"
 
I bet you could take down that whole forum, damage them beyond repair, just by uttering the word "ejaculation."
Don’t underestimate the cope and willful retardation.

It would be responded to with a “ACKSHUALLY some CIS men can’t ejaculate!” As if basic biological functions are some kind of 50/50 cointoss.
 
That one pooner already had a response to this, her strapon dick isn't messy like those darn CIS penises.
Let the trannies know about this one secret advantage to fake genitals. No messy fluids. No sirree, none of those messy vaginal secretions. All the ladies prefer it when their men don't ejaculate. So much cleaner.
 
Let the trannies know about this one secret advantage to fake genitals. No messy fluids. No sirree, none of those messy vaginal secretions. All the ladies prefer it when their men don't ejaculate. So much cleaner.
There was actually one particular deluded chick in that thread who started coping about “CIS penises going soft”.

Of course only a woman who never actually had sex, would prefer hours of pounding by piece of arm flesh inside a big, plastic sleeve, over 15 minutes of actual cock that neatly tucks away after use.
 
LIL DOOD HUMILIATED BY GIRLFRIEND: RHETORICAL VERSION OF A MK FATALITY

“Wonder what sex with a real penis feels like?!”


View attachment 7164965
That cold moment when you’re reminded that it IS a LARP. Brutal!

The fellow lil doods stream in to offer the most manliest of support!

View attachment 7164984

Retarded analogies are offered:
View attachment 7164966

Along with retarded reassurances:
View attachment 7164971

“What does it mean hurr-durr?!”

You know exactly what it means sweetheart. It means that you’re LARPing, you’re not a man, and the GF very naturally is wondering whether sex with an actual man feels similar to sex with a woman who’s pretending she’s a man.

View attachment 7164969
Of course nobody points out that she’s living a lie and unlikely to ever make a heterosexual woman happy and content.

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Whoops… Looks like the OP isn’t the only one with this problem.

Who would have thought there would ever be any problems with LARPing as the opposite sex, and ensnaring an inexperienced bisexual or non-lesbian into a relationship because of social pressure to be “accepting”.

Stick to dating lesbians ladies. This isn’t rocket science.
Hahaha definitely dating women who are like "what even is gender? Hearts not parts!" But then reality intrudes. Your libido cares much less for ideology lol
There was actually one particular deluded chick in that thread who started coping about “CIS penises going soft”.

Of course only a woman who never actually had sex, would prefer hours of pounding by piece of arm flesh inside a big, plastic sleeve, over 15 minutes of actual cock that neatly tucks away after use.
This is how you know that they haven't had any sex, or any fulfilling sex, with anyone, male or female. The difference between interacting with someone else's body and it's responses- even if they don't get off when you do, or already did, or have boner problems, or any other inconvenience- is MILES away from someone attaching a silicone stick to their crotch and thrusting away.
 
Lmao at all the pooners saying "What's a real thing anyway?", as if they don't know. You can play word games and act like reddit lawyer all you want, reality doesn't care how you label things or how you philosophically define it. At the end of the day, a real penis is a real penis, and everything else is fake. They know it too, that's why they bristle at the suggestion.
Do they think this works IRL?
“I don’t understand what you mean by ‘real!!!!’”
“Oh really? Well, that’s that resolved. Our relationship is perfect and free of issues forever.”
They aren't Kate. Its really that simple.

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Orrrr maybe one can treat a trans woman as a woman socially without denying physical reality? Oh no, wait, that would be too sensible for Bugsy Malone here. No, we must take an all-or-nothing approach, because that’s working so well at the moment!
 
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Where the fuck are young Western women getting these stereotypes from? When I was growing up, we were told constantly by teachers and pop culture that we could be and do and wear anything. Everything listed is insulting but really... only men are allowed to drink coffee? Did she literally grow up under the Taliban?

I can’t believe I missed this… Turns out I turn into a real boi when I throw on Willie Nelson and Marty Robbins. Seriously, I don’t know how we went from “you can like stuff even though you’re ____” and circled right back to “if you play with Hot Wheels, you’re a secret boy.” It’s the hashtags, isn’t it?

On a post about lying to doctors about your real sex:
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I’ve been seeing a lot of MTFs say “WE’RE LITERALLY BIOLOGICALLY FEMALE, CHECKMATE,” not so much from the FTMs. Good to see they’re getting in on the action.
 
I can’t believe I missed this… Turns out I turn into a real boi when I throw on Willie Nelson and Marty Robbins. Seriously, I don’t know how we went from “you can like stuff even though you’re ____” and circled right back to “if you play with Hot Wheels, you’re a secret boy.” It’s the hashtags, isn’t it?

On a post about lying to doctors about your real sex:
View attachment 7169137
I’ve been seeing a lot of MTFs say “WE’RE LITERALLY BIOLOGICALLY FEMALE, CHECKMATE,” not so much from the FTMs. Good to see they’re getting in on the action.
If HRT makes you biologically the opposite sex then wouldn't that mean women who take steroids aren't women and are in fact men? Or can medicine listen to your thoughts and intentions when taking it?

... Wouldnt that mean cancer shouldn't be a thing? I am sure cancer patients would love if magical thinking upon taking medication was a legitimate cure.
 
I can’t believe I missed this… Turns out I turn into a real boi when I throw on Willie Nelson and Marty Robbins. Seriously, I don’t know how we went from “you can like stuff even though you’re ____” and circled right back to “if you play with Hot Wheels, you’re a secret boy.” It’s the hashtags, isn’t it?

On a post about lying to doctors about your real sex:
View attachment 7169137
I’ve been seeing a lot of MTFs say “WE’RE LITERALLY BIOLOGICALLY FEMALE, CHECKMATE,” not so much from the FTMs. Good to see they’re getting in on the action.
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:story:

Reproductive ability is literally the only definition of sex. :lit: Sometimes I wonder if the people making these absurd claims are even sentient in the bare minimum way, or if this was concocted by an AI that is great at mimicking human patterns of communication, but incapable of parsing anything on a level that would constitute self-awareness. They're like the Scramblers in the sci-fi novel Blindsight.
 
Gendery envy? Hmm. I'll bite. What's got Lil dood so covetous?

>tall
Fair enough
>deep voice
Checks out
>skinny
[CONFUSED]

I thought pooners either tried to lift or just got super fat? How fat is this chick that she gets "gender envy" from a beanpole?
She's probably into thin guys. Fapcop is probably right, this pooner is just too spergy to understand her own feelings. "Why am I so nervous around this guy even though he's so nice? My heart starts beating faster, my palms get all sweaty...it must be DYSPHORIA!"
 
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