Megathread The Pooner Zoo - A thread for collecting wild Pooners and posting OC Pooners, and anything Pooner related

[Hepativore]

What's wrong with just being a woman that wants to wear boxers? They sell female versions now, with tacky patterns and everything. They're comfy during winter.
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I thought that they always did sell boxers for women, but it seems like an exercise in futility to try and wear boxer shorts cut for men because of the different shape of women's hips. But pooners have to try and prove that they are "men" by wearing ill-fitting men's clothing, I guess.

 

[Iron Jaguar]

Most werent hot to begin but then I'm no chalamet either

Naming a very Twinky actor whom most Pooners would fantasise about. Very good.

 

[Cool Dog Returns]

Isn't it wonderful that there is still innovation in body horror? Can you imagine, let's say in 2004, saying 'I predict in two decades women will want big clits the same way men right now want big dicks. And they'll take exogenous testosterone to get it'.

I'd have told you 'yeah right have another one' if I wasn't concerned you were too crazy drunk already.

Dont worry about the horrors of today

Worry about the horrors to come......

 

[The Jewel of the Nile]

They don't want to be associated with icky heterosexual sex, while writing the most stereotypical tradwife fantasy where the pooner gets dicked down by a male with a huge dick, gets pregnant, and then plays house and "seahorse dad" while they're a SAHM. It's the most feminine shit I've ever read.

They want to play house but at the same time they desperately want to avoid being the default, "boring" parent, eg being a mom. They associate dads with fun outings, creative playtime, boy outings in the forest or on a boat, you know, "the fun parent". They don't realize that
1) a kid needs both
2) nobody is stopping them from being a fun parent too and participating in those activities

 

[Hongourable Madisha]

I suspect a lot of them don't have dads or have bad dads too, so they fantasise about being a better dad than theirs was. You sometimes find in single parent families, one of the kids will try to take on the role of the missing parent to try to support the remaining one. "If only I were a boy I could support and protect my mum"; "if I were a girl I could give my dad more emotional support and cheer him up". It's unhealthy and child mental health workers should be able to spot it, but it happens. They don't want to be a mum because they see how much their own mums struggled, they want to be the role that supports them but also it's seen as optional or easy. Which, yeah, if you're a deadbeat and don't put any time and work into it, it's optional and easy, but then they'd be no better.

 

[EllenDrawsRapeOfHerHaters]

What's wrong with just being a woman that wants to wear boxers? They sell female versions now, with tacky patterns and everything. They're comfy during winter.
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If the brand made another set with the word "BOTTOM" I think it would sell tbh.

 

[Magic Pickle]

As someone who is in fandom and regularly reviews their "gay sex fantasies" in the fanfiction horrors thread, they usually latch onto characters they wish they could be or who they think resembles them.

Spoiler: Going into more pooner fandom detail.

Everything in your post is spot on, though I would say it's less a matter of "who they want to be"/"who they think resembles them" and moreso "who they find the most attractive" - and pooner tastes get fascinating. If it didn't seem too derailing to the thread, I'd love to do a roundup of original creations by pooners (not sure if it'd fit in the SJW Art Thread) as this is a scourge that spreads beyond just fandom spaces and enters any art space.

(Those unfamiliar with these types may be unaware of the abundance of patchy-bearded, pot-bellied, half-bald sleazeballs right out of Grand Theft Auto with top surgery scars; for some visual assistance, VCR_WOLFE is a prime example of this phenomenon.)

For another amusing piece of trivia to those unaware, fandom pooners also have a stronger tendency for infighting than you might expect even out of feisty fandom lasses: you have the fujoshi-pooners who want to read two actual dicks touching on account of "muh dysphorias" railing against the lack of tagging committed by the fujoshi-pooners who insist on FTM x Man because to tag it would be "delegitimizing" pooner yaoi. The former like to wield the accusation of straight girl fetishism against the latter, while the latter like to weaponize self-hatred as being specifically discriminatory towards "gay trans men."

They recognize each other as their own reflections: self-hating fetishists whose misogyny and erotic tastes blended into a sense of self in the absence of a more meaningful existence. And because they are the ultimate NLOGs, they hate this and will attack each other with vicious bloodthirst if pushed far enough, for they have a social movement on their side. Nothing as pithy and pointless as fighting over Sasuke x Naruto versus Naruto x Gaara - these are fights with true teeth. If I find more examples, I'll post them, because I find them funny. Go for the eyes!

There's really a whole discussion to be had about the manifestation of self-image, fanworks/fandom culture and how it intersects with female sexuality and social dynamics, but that'd probably bore the lads in the thread who just wanna laugh at goofy chicks, so apologies for the derail. Another time, perhaps.

Anyway, thread tax: a schizophrenic pooner dreams of finding love - or, well, not icky love, but maybe, like, a situationship?
Link | Archive

is femme4femme impossible?​

i was with my family over the holidays and we went to a leather bar together (my family is supportive, sometimes uninformed but they mean well) and when we went to the back patio with our drinks my mom was telling me how she wants me to stay safe and defend myself if cis men act weird around me (i also have a bad history with cis men, something she's aware of). i told her that despite being aro (and romance repulsed, so no serious relationships/romantic gestures Whatsoever) i would someday possibly like to be in some kind of situationship with another man BUT- i am strictly and exclusively femme4femme. and she began to tell me that queer men are usually only masc (not true) and even if they're femme, ONLY into other mascs (not to mention i'm also trans, which she said "makes things more complicated" - despite being 6.5 years on t, post top and a full beard i pass maybe 60% of the time because of how i present + body type. it doesn't bother me that much for the most part, i really don't care what strangers think of me except i guess it does bother me when i go to places such as gay bars and people there look at me and just stare, Not in a checking me out way because i can tell the difference). she wants me to try and keep my mind open to the possibility of being involved with a masc guy, which mascs are fine they're just not my type at ALL.
i want a man whos androgynous and gender nonconforming, neurodivergent, very femme, very outgoing and sassy/flamboyant (like me) and understanding that i'm aro/romance repulsed, or better yet also gay and aro (the only attention i attract from men at All are from straight chasers, who were mostly 3x my age LOL). besides gay bars which i plan to go to more this upcoming year (i live in one of the biggest us cities, there's lots to choose from), i'm kind of feeling like there's not many options for me.

For some reason, I think the schizophrenia LARPing may do her in worse than just being a tranny. Notably, she labeled herself as early-onset/childhood schizophrenic.
Link | Archive

trying social media again...​

hi everyone! this is the third time i've made a reddit account in the past few years, i get really paranoid and deactivate often so hopefully this won't be the case. i'm 25, i'm a gay + aromantic trans man and i've been diagnosed with schizophrenia since i was 12, i also have autism + adhd and bpd. right now i'm mostly stable (except at night things get hard for me) but i don't really know many people in my life who are schizophrenic so i would like to meet more people around my age who are and hopefully provide support to others who are struggling. i love animation (right now really into the precure series), video games (though because of work + symptom flareups its hard to play, i mostly play nintendo games and other cartoony/anime games), making art, music, fashion, animals (guinea pigs, hamsters and bunnies are my favorite) and a lot of other creative things. sometimes its hard for me to hold and maintain conversations but i'll try my best.

 

[Larry David's Opera Cape]

Anyway, thread tax: a schizophrenic pooner dreams of finding love - or, well, not icky love, but maybe, like, a situationship?

Her family went with her to a leather bar? Seriously I don't care how liberal or pro gay you are, what the FUCK?

i was with my family over the holidays and we went to a leather bar together (my family is supportive, sometimes uninformed but they mean well)

And this:

i've been diagnosed with schizophrenia since i was 12, i also have autism + adhd and bpd.

Assuming it isn't straight up fabrication, the only way this is possible at all is by seeing multiple different (bad) clinicians and never getting the diagnostic picture properly straightened out.

Childhood onset schizophrenia is a dubious entity to start with. It really only "exists" in the context of the USA's broken relationship with pharma. Other countries don't humor the concept at all, and the USA didn't until about 15 years ago. Odds are very good that it is not a real thing at all.

Borderline pd is itself mutually exclusive with schizophrenia except under the most extraordinary of circumstances. You should not be racking those up as comorbids on the same patient, especially so young. And that's not even getting started on the supposed "AuDHD" stuff.

 

[steelz]

I was fearing this for while. I don't follow her per say but I liked her DIY hamster builds so I occasionally watch her when those pop up in my recommendations. I noticed her voice changing and at first thought she had recorded while having a flu or something but after few videos I realized it had to be something more. Either she was really sick or using testosterone. I figured it was probably transitioning because while she looked rough, it mostly came across to me as depression rather than anything physical. Regardless if I was wrong it all just sounded sad so I didn't bother to confirm my suspicions. Sad.

yeah it is sad. i stopped watching her five years ago and only checked back periodically and i was taken a bit by surprise, she never showed signs of anything like that before. idk who's giving her the testosterone but they should be shot, look at what that shit did to her
edit: remembered that she used to have she/he pronouns in bio before the pooning in about 2021. before that, nothing at all

 

[scathefire]

Childhood onset schizophrenia is a dubious entity to start with. It really only "exists" in the context of the USA's broken relationship with pharma. Other countries don't humor the concept at all, and the USA didn't until about 15 years ago. Odds are very good that it is not a real thing at all.

I think it does exist but it's so rare and so serious that a dose of skepticism is definitely necessary, onset outside of teenage/young adulthood doesn't happen very much. Also always be skeptical of people who are super into using their alleged illnesses/disabilities as a method of gaining sympathy and/or as a cudgel toward other people online, as it's a sign that it's probably just a LARP.

 

[Audit]

There's really a whole discussion to be had about the manifestation of self-image, fanworks/fandom culture and how it intersects with female sexuality and social dynamics, but that'd probably bore the lads in the thread who just wanna laugh at goofy chicks, so apologies for the derail. Another time, perhaps.

Perhaps this isn't the thread for that, but I find female drama/bullshit hilarious. We are posting in the salon after all. Truly awful people/lolcows bore the fuck out of me. It's these weird communities devoted to monumentally insane things that are fascinating. Go ahead and find/make a thread for fandom fujo nonsense.

 

[Larry David's Opera Cape]

I think it does exist but it's so rare and so serious that a dose of skepticism is definitely necessary, onset outside of teenage/young adulthood doesn't happen very much. Also always be skeptical of people who are super into using their alleged illnesses/disabilities as a method of gaining sympathy and/or as a cudgel toward other people online, as it's a sign that it's probably just a LARP.

I could buy it starting at about late middle school age bare minimum. Same with bipolar disorder. I don't think the concept of "psychosis" makes sense before the prefrontal lobe development that occurs after the initiation of puberty. There are very good, hard science reasons why little kids think the way they do. The limits on the functioning of their brain are not just due to lack of experience or training, but actual lack of hardware to perform certain functions. It's just not there yet.

(Insert troubling questions about the obvious cognitive impact of troondrugs here.)

 

[Cool Dog Returns]

"if I were a girl I could give my dad more emotional support and cheer him up".

That sounds like he wishes he was a girl so he could bang his dad, which is fucked up, but most troons I seen want to be a girl so they can fuck around with random men to make daddy mad like chicks do in the pornos they fap to every hour

early-onset/childhood schizophrenic.

So you got a schizo shithead for a daughter who is halfway to 30 and instead of having her on every pill available you let her stupid ass go full pooner and even take her yourself to a fucking gay ass leather bar, what the fuck? how are people like these fucking retards allowed to breed? shit like this makes me wish for mandatory post-birth abortions

And look at the masc pooner playing kiddie games and watching chinky cartoons for little girls, so macho! the gayest twink out there would beat the shit out of this pooner and call her a flaming faggot

 

[⋖ cørdion ⋗]

What's wrong with just being a woman that wants to wear boxers? They sell female versions now, with tacky patterns and everything. They're comfy during winter.
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Boxers and those triangular sports bras with thick straps that look more like spartan clothing than lingerie. But no, "MEN force us to wear frills!" etc

 

[Turquoise]

I'm dyslexic and often read 'pooner zoo' as 'zoomer poo'. Imagine my disappointment when I come here expecting to be grossed out... oh wait...

 

[Swede]

I feel bad for people named Aiden/Brayden or some other typical TIF name that are actually men.

 

[scathefire]

I feel bad for people named Aiden/Brayden or some other typical TIF name that are actually men.

My brother has somewhat of a pooner name, it doesn’t seem to bother him though. That’s the right attitude to have.

 

[Hepativore]

I feel bad for people named Aiden/Brayden or some other typical TIF name that are actually men.

My brother has somewhat of a pooner name, it doesn’t seem to bother him though. That’s the right attitude to have.

To be fair, I do not think a lot of "normies" are aware of all of the cultural stereotypes surrounding pooners or what "pooner" even means yet.. I mean, the most common cultural face of a "trans" person is usually a troon in his 20s and 30s, even if FTMs probably outnumber MTFs at this point because of all of the girls that are pooning-out in their high school and college years.

Because of this, I doubt most non-Kiwi Farmers hear "Aiden" or "Shaye" and think "pooner", as they probably think it is more along the lines of some pretentious teen or unlucky kid with hipster parents, much like how Gwyneth Paltrow named her child, "Apple".

 

[Sinner's Sandwich]

Pooner monster with rotdog stiffy greets her kids. Absolutely fucking disgusting!

https://x.com/TTExulansic/status/1861340710840213757

 

[Cheesy Beavy]

To be fair, I do not think a lot of "normies" are aware of all of the cultural stereotypes surrounding pooners or what "pooner" even means yet

As someone new to the farms I want to put my input here. I agree. At least where I’m at, most trans are seen as MtF (either mentally unwell in college or 40 yr old AGP creep). Any stereotypes of trans are associated with MtF not pooners. But our thoughts basically boil down to mentally unwell (for both MtF and FtM). I’d never heard of “pooners” before now, NOR had I seen any of the hysterical stereotype caricatures.

I mean, the most common cultural face of a "trans" person is usually a troon in his 20s and 30s

At least where I’m at, again MtF. Maybe I’m different for people around my age, but I’ve always viewed them as most likely unpassable and definitely weird. Every one of them I meant in college was 100% off mentally (don’t see/meet too many here). Overall weird. I never really dealt with a lot of pooners. I (THINK) met one that later declared themselves a pooner after they dropped out but was so mentally unwell anyway I knew being trans wasn’t the solution.

(Kind of side note, I’ve HEARD of research showing that if a pooner comes out, her high school buddies are more likely to do the same. Been too lazy and comes up fairly infrequently until here but if someone has the study off hand would love to see)

Because of this, I doubt most non-Kiwi Farmers hear "Aiden" or "Shaye" and think "pooner", as they probably think it is more along the lines of some pretentious teen or unlucky kid with hipster parents,

Exactly. I don’t personally associate any names with pooners yet. Would love to hear some more though simply for the sake of making fun of people and shit posting.