Megathread Trannies posting their L's Online - Heckin valid people posting their funny misfortunes on the internet

[ThicClaw]

Dear Reddit, my clitoris has fallen off. Should I be worried?

Sir, this is a Wendy's.

 

[cerulean hydra]

What do TIFs do when it comes to Cope, Seethe, Dilate since they don't dilate?
Scream (into the void)?

Most pooners probably need to be told "cope, seethe, and man up," when they start having a freakout. They seem to get more offended by "man up" than insecure men do.

 

[Sinner's Sandwich]

sometimes I get uncomfortable with my breasts and hourglass figure

hourglass figure

Only in your fucking dreams, you deluded sick tranny fuck

 

[Got Milk!]

This is that troon 9 months ago: -

View attachment 5297519

Kind of a white Prince look. Certainly not a terrible looking fella.

After 9 months on troon juice: -

View attachment 5297521

lol. Basically no difference, apart from lipstick, shaved brows, and an attempt at a female haircut.

It looks like the tranny from 90 day fiance. The questionable individual on the right is a guy from Minnesota who flew to England to be with the tranny. He questioned, and was clearly uncomfortable with the idea of being with a guy, but soldiered on and apparently had sex with it. (The morning after he made it sound like he did some grabass. The tranny corrected the record that they "had sex") You can tell he regrets everything but won't be transphobic on TV so he sucks dick instead.

 

[Sinner's Sandwich]

He questioned, and was clearly uncomfortable with the idea of being with a guy, but soldiered on and apparently had sex with it. (The morning after he made it sound like he did some grabass. The tranny corrected the record that they "had sex")

And by that the tranny means that he raped the other guy.

 

[TroonFiringSquad]

I dunno what it is, but sometimes I get uncomfortable with my breasts and hourglass figure

I bet this guy has "moobs" at best and nothing resembling an hourglass figure.

It used to be a joke to say someone has manboobs now you have these people thinking they're actually titties.

 

[batteredpancakes]

This one's hilarious.
Link | Archive

NSFW: Surely I'm not the only one thinking this while watching porn

There are times when I'm watching porn that I get just flat out LIVID that I'm transgendered. The biggest reason?

Some of these cismen don't know how to fuck properly!!!

These bastards have dicks sewn onto their bodies for FREE and they don't know how to use the damn things! Some of them have no rhythm, no technique, no speed, no thrust, NOTHING. God really wasted dicks on some of these men while I've been laying it down with 3 inches, a plastic dong, & some fabric for my entire life & making my partners walk funny the next day! Yet these cismen, with their added inches (sometimes way more than they deserve ) are out here plugging and pumping like seizing rabbits.

It just makes me sick! I firmly believe that God didn't give us transmen dicks because we'd be too powerful. If I had a fully functional crotch rocket locked and loaded for love... I'd make Ron Jeremy look like a two-pump chump I'd be pumping cock like a rooster in a henhouse. I'd be hiding the ham like I owned a deli. I'd be pounding so much penis I would run out of similes!!

Other transdudes feel my pain right? Why can't these cismen use the one organ they say makes us so different from them properly?? It's embarrassing couldn't be me. I was born with the instructions for a part I wasn't fitted for & could still use it better than they could ever dream of

Edit: Wow, I didn't expect this to get as much engagement as it has! I'm glad that my impassioned rant on the efficacy of the worlds' shaft supply has touched the hearts of my fellow shaft-shorted brethren.

I also saw a few people mention that this is a copypasta it isn't, but that is certainly a huge compliment to me as a writer! I'm glad it made so many people laugh. And tbh I'm glad that it got under some cismens' skin as well. I'm so tired of hearing about how we're inferior to them due to our lack of anatomy when I've been on the receiving end of that anatomy more times than I can count, and the majority were unimpressive. (I've been dicked down from Poundtown to Slutsville more often by fellow transmen) If it made you, a cisman fitted with all we ever dreamt of, mad... then you may want to pause the next time you're in the bedroom to see if you're in there retrofitting a pipe or actually putting it down.

And then I want you to ask yourself... could a transmen be giving it to my partner even better? Just know that every time a cisman fails to satisfy his partner in the bedroom, a transman gets his wings. [/satire]

comments are interesting also

Omfz. DUDE.
I'm in the ER right now and didn't put in a packer, so the dysphoria is biting hard. Your post just cleared that up!!! Thank you, OP, from the bottom of my noncorpeal balls.

Tbh the amount of times I have thought to myself “I bet God made me trans bc if I had a dick I would be too powerful.” I always feel a little silly thinking that but I can’t say I don’t agree with you here. I actually sometimes yell at the guy in porn like “you idiot! She was finally enjoying that why did you stop!??”

Around the age of ten, before I knew I was trans, the thought occurred to me that if I had a dick I’d have pissed everywhere and on everything like some kind of dog marking it’s territory. We travelled and moved a lot when I was a kid so if I was cis I’d have probably pissed on landmarks in most major cities in California and a few places in New York and Las Vegas by the age of ten. Don’t think into it too much, I was a weird kid

LMFAO

Bro I was having this episode a couple of days ago.

I firmly believe that God didn't give us transmen dicks because we'd be too powerful.

I have this thought constantly. I feel kinda bad for having the thought, but I am glad to see others feelin it too.

Whoooa! Dude that's impressive! I haven't visited a pornsite in a while as that has started to become psychologically more painful as more of my dysphoria has unwrapped itself. But I feel a bit more confident now that if I get bottom growth on T and will be able to use it how I would want to, I could fuck. Like actually fuck and not just kinda... pretend to be able to do that. Thank you brother, thinking about T feels a bit more optimistic now than before (I have usually been pretty pessimistic about how I could use my potential t-dick).

I told this to a friend once, my words were nearly the same, something like: „ God knew, if he gave me a dick, i would have banged the whole world, wouldn‘t have had time to go to school or do other things.“ Such a waste xD

God nerfed me cause I would of killed ur dad if I had my dick.

 

[Druveer]

View attachment 5297283

Out of the mouth of babes...

 

[ThicClaw]

@batteredpancakes This comes off as a troll or cope. If it's real, holy shit lmao

 

[ThePissWitch]

This is that troon 9 months ago: -

View attachment 5297519

Kind of a white Prince look. Certainly not a terrible looking fella.

After 9 months on troon juice: -

View attachment 5297521

lol. Basically no difference, apart from lipstick, shaved brows, and an attempt at a female haircut.

From prettyboy to ugly girl, every time.

What's worse is when they have strong masculine jawlines and waste them on their humiliation fetish.

 

[Rick The Stick]

From prettyboy to ugly girl, every time.

What's worse is when they have strong masculine jawlines and waste them on their humiliation fetish.

Got some low standards if that's a "pretty boy". Fucking swear, everytime I see people say any of these dudes are handsome or pretty they're always some retarded lookin goober who just has a decent jawline. A good jawline doesn't do shit if you look like a goober the way these troons always do.

 

[ThicClaw]

Got some low standards if that's a "pretty boy". Fucking swear, everytime I see people say any of these dudes are handsome or pretty they're always some retarded lookin goober who just has a decent jawline. A good jawline doesn't do shit if you look like a goober the way these troons always do.

I'll say he's not that bad looking. With a good education, landing himself a good career I'd say he'd be made in the shade.
Unfortunately trooning out because of a kink or mental illness just made his life 100x harder. No amount of camera filters will keep away the intrusive thoughts.

 

[batteredpancakes]

@batteredpancakes This comes off as a troll or cope. If it's real, holy shit lmao

I thought of that but neverless it has 2.2k upvotes and 150 comments of pooners agreeing so

 

[NOT Sword Fighter Super]

This one's hilarious.

No straight man uses emojis like that, so they're either channeling a very gay man or they're just a confused woman who wishes she wasn't.

 

[Next Task]

No straight man uses emojis like that, so they're either channeling a very gay man or they're just a confused woman who wishes she wasn't.

They're totally DOODS who are all up in that BRO TALK. Don't you know all men talk like this about their bitches? It's just locker-room talk, BRAH!

All these manly men having a very manly conversation about their stroke game - and they're not talking about golf, know what I'm saying? They are extremely convincing at being masculine, maybe today they won't have to sob in the bathroom for 45 minutes to get over being looked at.

 

[Howslans]

They're totally DOODS who are all up in that BRO TALK. Don't you know all men talk like this about their bitches? It's just locker-room talk, BRAH!

That's what gets me every time, they're trying so hard to sound like how they think men sound.

It's the pooner equivalent of the repulsive male troons' trying to do 'girl talk'; 'Squee!!!! I was so excited my boobs jumped out of my blouse!!!'

How do our male kiwis feel about this manly male bro-talk? Is it more imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, or does it make your skin crawl and bile rise in your throat like the troons' cum-soaked girl-talk does for women kiwis?

 

[Mad_Dog]

How do our male kiwis feel about this manly male bro-talk?

It's like observing a child pretend to be a grown up, but sadder.

 

[Positron]

How do our male kiwis feel about this manly male bro-talk?

Even a gynecologist can't tell.

 

[Procrastinhater]

I thought of that but neverless it has 2.2k upvotes and 150 comments of pooners agreeing so

>also saw a few people mention that this is a copypasta it isn't,

It is now Li'l Pooner.

That's what gets me every time, they're trying so hard to sound like how they think men sound.

It's the pooner equivalent of the repulsive male troons' trying to do 'girl talk'; 'Squee!!!! I was so excited my boobs jumped out of my blouse!!!'

How do our male kiwis feel about this manly male bro-talk? Is it more imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, or does it make your skin crawl and bile rise in your throat like the troons' cum-soaked girl-talk does for women kiwis?

I mean personally I think it hillarious, but I've got a pretty dark sense of humor, it's like when I'm walking my Rotties and one of those little rat dogs start snarling and straining at the leash to get at them, it's almost endearing, they try so hard
They'll get there. (I mean they won't but its still funny.)

 

[Next Task]

It's like observing a child pretend to be a grown up, but sadder.

So much sadder. Kids playing at being grown up is them learning about the world, usually by imitating what they see. It's often very cute.

This is never cute, and really illustrates how men and women are perceived in general. MtFs doing 'girl talk' comes off as predatory and sex-obsessed. FtMs doing 'boy talk' comes off as pathetic and delusional. It's all four of those things for both groups, but the group of women seem less dangerous doing the same thing as men for very obvious reasons, even if they are possibly more insane.

Easy check, though - men pretending to be women and vice versa has been a comedy staple for all of human history until Current Year. Compare films where an actor has to cross-dress and then try to fit in as their new gender, see what vibes they give nowadays.