- Joined
- Mar 10, 2013
Well,
(Oh fuck am I really going to do this? It seems that I am. Apologies in advance, I'm going to make myself look like a total tool. I have a lot of stuff. By "a lot," I mean "a metric shit-ton. A bunch of it is just, well, stuff, but there are a few real treasures mixed in. Anyone else know how to drive big analog synths, the kind with patchcords and jacks? Didn't think so. Anyone else ever jammed with Jimmy Page, mixed Guns N' Roses, or had an appointment for an audition with Zappa? Buncha punks. I hate all of you.)
(OK, starting over
Well,
there's the Steinway grand,
the Sequential Circuits Prophet T-8 (look it up),
the Steiner EVI (look it up),
the three-cabinet Moog synth,
the Arp 2600,
the Korg T3,
the $3200 pair of Genelec nearfield monitors,
the two surround sound systems,
the yamaha mixer, the TAC mixer,
the rackmount compressor-limiter,
the four Shure SM-58s,
the three SM-57s,
the two Sennheiser 421s,
the Gemeinhardt silver open-hole flute,
the Selmer Mk VI (look it up in wikipedia) alto sax I bought new in Paris when I was 13 years old (now worth abt. 30x what I paid),
the Selmer Mk VII tenor,
the Selmer Super Action 80 soprano, bought in the same store in Paris 14 years after the alto,
the Roland SC-55 Mk 2,
the little Kurzweil synth-thing (I don't remember the number),
the Yamaha WX-7 MIDI breath controller (played like a sax),
the matching Yamaha something or other synth it wants to plug into,
the Yamaha WX-5 MIDI thing -- it was the next version after the WX-7,
the matching Yamaha VL-70m synth,
the Alesis Fusion 8HD keyboard (my main rig at the moment) - 88 keys, a nicely weighted action, a hard drive, and something like twelve audio ins and eight outs,
the banana-yellow Stratocaster (I suck at guitar, but the price was too good to pass up),
the elctro-acoustic Ovation guitar -- one of the kinds with all the little bitty sound holes -- see note above re: Strat,
the lute (yes, an honest-to-god lute -- I may stick in a picture of it just to annoy you),
and a few more old groovy analog synths, outboard rackmount effects/eq/preamps, racks to put them in, more amplifiers than you can count on your fingers,
speakers for days, sufficient headphones to plug every bodily orifice, mike stands, assorted percussion thingies, a few more guitars and things in odd corners, hundreds of pounds (I am not kidding -- you come here and move this shit next time) of cables, and probably a bunch of crap I'm forgetting. Stupid little MIDI boxes and things like that. Mike stands.Cocaine spoons.
The point being, you accumulate stuff, you don't just have stuff. Give it a few years, and many of you will be in the same wretched condition.
I moonlighted as a session player in Los Angeles in the late '80s / early '90s and had a couple of bands that made people blink. I made it into print once; sadly they don't have an online archive that goes back far enough and I don't have a copy, but the L.A. Weekly reviewed of one of our shows way back when and described me as "the most dangerous doubler in Los Angeles."
I will now go away, partly in shame, and partly because I feel an urge to either play Rachmaninoff, or L4D2.
Oh yeah, in case I haven't made enough of an ass of myself yet, I have one of these and you don't. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
(Oh fuck am I really going to do this? It seems that I am. Apologies in advance, I'm going to make myself look like a total tool. I have a lot of stuff. By "a lot," I mean "a metric shit-ton. A bunch of it is just, well, stuff, but there are a few real treasures mixed in. Anyone else know how to drive big analog synths, the kind with patchcords and jacks? Didn't think so. Anyone else ever jammed with Jimmy Page, mixed Guns N' Roses, or had an appointment for an audition with Zappa? Buncha punks. I hate all of you.)
(OK, starting over
Well,
there's the Steinway grand,
the Sequential Circuits Prophet T-8 (look it up),
the Steiner EVI (look it up),
the three-cabinet Moog synth,
the Arp 2600,
the Korg T3,
the $3200 pair of Genelec nearfield monitors,
the two surround sound systems,
the yamaha mixer, the TAC mixer,
the rackmount compressor-limiter,
the four Shure SM-58s,
the three SM-57s,
the two Sennheiser 421s,
the Gemeinhardt silver open-hole flute,
the Selmer Mk VI (look it up in wikipedia) alto sax I bought new in Paris when I was 13 years old (now worth abt. 30x what I paid),
the Selmer Mk VII tenor,
the Selmer Super Action 80 soprano, bought in the same store in Paris 14 years after the alto,
the Roland SC-55 Mk 2,
the little Kurzweil synth-thing (I don't remember the number),
the Yamaha WX-7 MIDI breath controller (played like a sax),
the matching Yamaha something or other synth it wants to plug into,
the Yamaha WX-5 MIDI thing -- it was the next version after the WX-7,
the matching Yamaha VL-70m synth,
the Alesis Fusion 8HD keyboard (my main rig at the moment) - 88 keys, a nicely weighted action, a hard drive, and something like twelve audio ins and eight outs,
the banana-yellow Stratocaster (I suck at guitar, but the price was too good to pass up),
the elctro-acoustic Ovation guitar -- one of the kinds with all the little bitty sound holes -- see note above re: Strat,
the lute (yes, an honest-to-god lute -- I may stick in a picture of it just to annoy you),
and a few more old groovy analog synths, outboard rackmount effects/eq/preamps, racks to put them in, more amplifiers than you can count on your fingers,
speakers for days, sufficient headphones to plug every bodily orifice, mike stands, assorted percussion thingies, a few more guitars and things in odd corners, hundreds of pounds (I am not kidding -- you come here and move this shit next time) of cables, and probably a bunch of crap I'm forgetting. Stupid little MIDI boxes and things like that. Mike stands.
The point being, you accumulate stuff, you don't just have stuff. Give it a few years, and many of you will be in the same wretched condition.
I moonlighted as a session player in Los Angeles in the late '80s / early '90s and had a couple of bands that made people blink. I made it into print once; sadly they don't have an online archive that goes back far enough and I don't have a copy, but the L.A. Weekly reviewed of one of our shows way back when and described me as "the most dangerous doubler in Los Angeles."
I will now go away, partly in shame, and partly because I feel an urge to either play Rachmaninoff, or L4D2.
Oh yeah, in case I haven't made enough of an ass of myself yet, I have one of these and you don't. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.