Disney General - The saddest fandom on Earth

[Betonhaus]

Are there no parks? Are there no playgrounds?

you mean the crackhead hangouts and the homeless campsites?

 

[Vyse Inglebard]

 

[Lobster Cult High Priest]

Getting their child out of the house.

Really, what is there left to take your children to these days. Most of the child-centric places are now either gone, been aged up (McDonalds), ghetto-fied (Six Flags), or are way too expensive (Disney). The movies will at least get them out, even if it for another screen.

True to an extent but trampoline parks and rock climbing have been popping up everywhere.

There’s mini golf. Not sure about laser tag these days (if kids still do that)

 

[Scarlett Johansson]

Is Rapunzel going to have that hideous lesbian haircut? (Seriously he could have easily cut it shoulder length) I guess if she turns black she'll have a weave and Willow Smith will play her.

Bob Iger needs to disappear permanently.

 

[BigBadBastich]

Are there no parks? Are there no playgrounds?

Falling into disrepair due to the utter indifference of local governments and populated by homeless, druggies, niggers or pedophiles (sometimes a combination of all 4). You have to live in a semi-decent neighborhood to see a nice park area for families to do fun recreational activities. Golf courses though? Protected to hell and back.

 

[Scientifically Inaccurate]

And of course, this means that the live-action remake slop will continue unabated. Disney will take the wrong lesson from Snow White's failure; since Lilo and Stitch did gangbusters, it's not that nobody wants remakes, it's that they need to keep a tighter lid on their actors so they don't make an utter embarrassment of themselves and hurt the box office. I mean, they do, but that's beside the point.

I'm going to regret saying this because it's inevitably going to be too but I'm still hopeful Snow White might have killed at least some of these.

As wonderful as it would have been, there was pretty much no chance Stitch was going to lose money. Humanity has an insatiable appetite for Stitch. The amount of merchandise Disney constantly pumps out for him is insane. I'm surprised I haven't seen any Stitch hoarders show up on the Consoomer thread yet.

But Snow White still could have rattled them enough to not go for anything that's not an absolute 100% guarantee. Two princess remakes have lost money at this point, so maybe Tangled will be spared.

Bambi's not a giant merchandising powerhouse and is definitely the kind of movie that hacks will watch and deride as boring and not modern enough to draw people (they already said they plan to tone down the mother's death, which just screams "we don't understand this movie and feel we must make it something else entirely"). So maybe that'll die.

Frozen will get one, but Frozen already sucked, so whatever.

 

[Stratorroz]

Disney filmed Mulan in a concentration camp. If they were ever held accountable for their flagrant discard of human ethics they would be jailed ten times over.

But oh no, we have to get rid of Splash Mountain because a small vocal minority deemed it "racist" for being based off a film hardly anyone's seen.

 

[Vyse Inglebard]

One of the few times a Redditor grows a few braincells - and it's over a Disney live-action remake. Go figure.

 

[Judge Holden]

I wonder how it's going to top the massive bitchslap the original movie gave Janet's VA by ditching her for some literal who pop star.

I will give you an image, and then I will give you a word.

Z E N D A Y A

 

[Scientifically Inaccurate]

One of the few times a Redditor grows a few braincells - and it's over a Disney live-action remake. Go figure.
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"Indigenous families where kids are taken from their communities and put with strangers..."

Is this still happening anywhere in the developed world?

 

[crowabunga]

Oh it's doing well, what a terrible shame. Will Disney's reputation ever become terminally tarnished? I can get consuming slop when it's a novelty, but between mediocrity and the existence of originals which at this point should always be presumed better, I don't understand the root of consumer motivation to spend time and money going to a theater.

Then again, I don't get why normies don't pirate and I visit a verboten racist / "racist" gossip website for fun so I guess my theory of mind is failing again.

you mean the crackhead hangouts and the homeless campsites?

Hey, you can find playgrounds without those things... In backwater places no one wants to live, with the worst schools and fattest people in the country.

 

[Betonhaus]

As wonderful as it would have been, there was pretty much no chance Stitch was going to lose money. Humanity has an insatiable appetite for Stitch. The amount of merchandise Disney constantly pumps out for him is insane. I'm surprised I haven't seen any Stitch hoarders show up on the Consoomer thread yet

I would put money on the "Ohana means foster care" bit crossing a line which actually causes people to stop buying as much Stitch merchandise

 

[Honka Honka Burning Love]

Are there no parks? Are there no playgrounds?

Not allowed anymore, Gotta protect the childrens from strangers! The 6 O'clock news said that everything is dangerous now can't have little Bimmy play outside..he is autistic and might get lost!

 

[Amber the Hedgehog]

"Indigenous families where kids are taken from their communities and put with strangers..."

Is this still happening anywhere in the developed world?

Yes but only in the same way it happens to whities and others. When the parents are unable to take of the kids properly the children go to foster care. If nobody from the family volunteers to take care of them, they are sented to strangers because what other options are there? It's not like indigenous people are prevented from becoming foster parents and even if they did they are still strangers.

 

[Judge Holden]

Yes but only in the same way it happens to whities and others. When the parents are unable to take of the kids properly the children go to foster care. If nobody from the family volunteers to take care of them, they are sented to strangers because what other options are there? It's not like indigenous people are prevented from becoming foster parents and even if they did they are still strangers.

Get the children out of an abusive situation and the professional activist circus shrieks about how its anuddah lost generation and trail of tears and that fucking white people are stealing injun babies

Let "the community" take care of it and the professional activist circus shrieks about how them continuing to be abused and neglected is an ongoing genocide waged by fucking white people

Its unwinnable by intent, as the problem being addressed removes the pretext for the professional activist circus to exist and receive infinity government gibdats and academic/corporate sinecures

 

[Kari Kamiya]

Then again, I don't get why normies don't pirate

That's why they're "normies". Mainstream media for a long time has said piracy is bad that it's rooted itself into pop culture, and they listen to what the TV tells them.

 

[Trilby]

That's why they're "normies". Mainstream media for a long time has said piracy is bad that it's rooted itself into pop culture, and they listen to what the TV tells them.

It's how we learned to move up from it.

 

[That Chris Guy]

Baby: Secret Of The Lost Legend

Greetings, Only-other-person-who-has-talked-about-that-movie! I was very entertained by it back in the day.

(they already said they plan to tone down the mother's death, which just screams "we don't understand this movie and feel we must make it something else entirely").

How do you "tone down" an off-screen death? Is Bambi going to start singing Buckle Your Pants after being told she's dead?

 

[Judge Holden]

they already said they plan to tone down the mother's death, which just screams "we don't understand this movie and feel we must make it something else entirely

Did somebody prank them by switching Bambi with one of the Death Wish movies before they gave it the single contractually mandated viewing and they never noticed, and have thus assumed that Bambi's mother was raped to death aboard an NYC subway car?

Like seriously are they gonna replace the gunshot with the Taco Bell sound? I mean how in the fuck are they talking about toning down an offscreen 1940s disney movie animal death?!

 

[Kari Kamiya]

I mean how in the fuck are they talking about toning down an offscreen 1940s disney movie animal death?!

Watch it be wasting disease thinking "Well at least she doesn't get MURDERED by a HUNTER!"