Grace Lavery / Joseph Lavery & Daniel M. Lavery / Mallory Ortberg - "Straight with extra steps" couple trooning out to avoid "dwindling into mere heterosexuality"

[Trianon]

I really want Mallory to get the franken dick. Then I want her to force both Joe and home wrecker (why can't I remember that bitch's name?) to suck it. That would be hilarious. Bonus points if she pegs Joe with it.

It would be ironic if this is the thing that finally makes her man up.

 

[mrae]

Lily gave Mallory a haircut.

Spoiler

It has a pinhead inducing effect and Mallory's weird, simpering expression in the 3rd photo is sending me. Look at Lily's face in the 2nd photo, bitch knows what she did.

 

[Mealy Mouth Spittle]

Lily gave Mallory a haircut.

Spoiler

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It has a pinhead inducing effect and Mallory's weird, simpering expression in the 3rd photo is sending me. Look at Lily's face in the 2nd photo, bitch knows what she did.

That is one of the worst diy hair cuts I've seen. It makes Mallory look like a weirdly hairy kewpie doll.

Homewrecker is not looking so hot either. She's giving off MtF troon vibes in that photo. Looks like an older Chelsea Manning wearing pedo glasses but less attractive somehow. Also those roots need a touch up.

I know people get less attractive as they age, but troons seem to hit the wall at warp speed. And, apparently, just being in their orbit has the same effect. Home wrecker should get out while she can.

 

[Diana Moon Glampers]

Incredible move to ice out the competition. I'm sure she's also encouraging Mallory to get the phallo, anything that makes it obvious which part of the V the hinge should go off alone with.

 

[FATTESTCUNT]

That haircut is shit, but I would never guess that it was a woman unless you told me, at least, not from that last pic. Joe, on the other hand, will always look like a man unless God appears in the sky and grants everyone a miracle each.

 

[Carnavoyeur]

The cut is terrible but Mallory looks leaps and bounds better. Short hair suits her face. Now she just needs to stop dressing like a grungy teenage burnout and she'd pass decently enough.

 

[squirreltail]

I'm still waiting to see if Mallory becomes a prominent detransitioner. It seems like FTMs detrans more than MtF (but that could be an age thing, they seem to transition younger and who doesn't regret choices they made at 16?)

It couldn't be more humiliating than being with Joe.

 

[Julie Newmar]

That haircut is shit, but I would never guess that it was a woman unless you told me, at least, not from that last pic. Joe, on the other hand, will always look like a man unless God appears in the sky and grants everyone a miracle each.

Nah because I’m asking god that my wish be Joe will never pass no matter what.

 

[OttoWest]

Homewrecker is not looking so hot either. She's giving off MtF troon vibes in that photo. Looks like an older Chelsea Manning wearing pedo glasses but less attractive somehow. Also those roots need a touch up.

There’s a Bond marathon on, and that lady could stunt double for Christopher Walken:

 

[NopeNoJustNo]

There’s a Bond marathon on, and that lady could stunt double for Christopher Walken:
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Don't insult Christopher Walken like that!

I never got the "Lily is hot" stuff. For one thing, she's always looked so, so old. When I first saw pictures of her and Joe, I wondered if she was his mom or aunt. She looks 50s if not 60s sometimes to me.

She's thin, and her face is symmetrical, but aside from that, she's not very good-looking. Her academic page has an old photo of her when she had a more conservative look, and it's not great. https://art.msu.edu/people/lily-woodruff/

It seems like the funky hairstyle is doing a lot of the work in making her "hot".

In addition to the underwhelming physical presentation, the aspects of her personality that are conveyed are very "off". The dead serial killer eyes are particularly unsettling. People usually try to present themselves in the best possible light online, and with her it's.... something is not right. Maybe it's just Asperger's.

 

[Mealy Mouth Spittle]

Don't insult Christopher Walken like that!

I never got the "Lily is hot" stuff. For one thing, she's always looked so, so old. When I first saw pictures of her and Joe, I wondered if she was his mom or aunt. She looks 50s if not 60s sometimes to me.

She's thin, and her face is symmetrical, but aside from that, she's not very good-looking. Her academic page has an old photo of her when she had a more conservative look, and it's not great. https://art.msu.edu/people/lily-woodruff/

It seems like the funky hairstyle is doing a lot of the work in making her "hot".

In addition to the underwhelming physical presentation, the aspects of her personality that are conveyed are very "off". The dead serial killer eyes are particularly unsettling. People usually try to present themselves in the best possible light online, and with her it's.... something is not right. Maybe it's just Asperger's.

If she were actually hot, she wouldn't let Joe touch her with a 10 foot pole. Joe obviously thinks that she is the hottest female he has ever been allowed to touch, but that's a pretty low bar. And he prefers her because she is more feminine than Mallory. He's not into dudes -- not even pretend ones like Mallory.

I actually think Mallory -- pre troon -- is much more attractive than home wrecker. Joe just destroys everything he touches. Lily will end up looking like Quasimodo once Joe gets through with her.

 

[Trianon]

Don't insult Christopher Walken like that!

I never got the "Lily is hot" stuff. For one thing, she's always looked so, so old. When I first saw pictures of her and Joe, I wondered if she was his mom or aunt. She looks 50s if not 60s sometimes to me.

She's thin, and her face is symmetrical, but aside from that, she's not very good-looking. Her academic page has an old photo of her when she had a more conservative look, and it's not great. https://art.msu.edu/people/lily-woodruff/

It seems like the funky hairstyle is doing a lot of the work in making her "hot".

In addition to the underwhelming physical presentation, the aspects of her personality that are conveyed are very "off". The dead serial killer eyes are particularly unsettling. People usually try to present themselves in the best possible light online, and with her it's.... something is not right. Maybe it's just Asperger's.

Yeah, she's just thin. The lines around her mouth are unfortunate and make her look 20 years older than she is.

Here's another picture of the hair cutting, courtesy of Joe.

Link | Archive

 

[Diana Moon Glampers]

Very dignified. I'm sure this is more of their sex play making it onto the public internet in full view. Everyone's clothed so it's fine that they're getting off.

 

[Julie Newmar]

Yeah, she's just thin. The lines around her mouth are unfortunate and make her look 20 years older than she is.

Here's another picture of the hair cutting, courtesy of Joe.

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Link | Archive

It looks like a serial killer grooming Private Pyle

 

[kaien]

No wonder Joe typically photographs Lily from the neck down. She's well on her way to the full Janet Reno face.

 

[Karen™]

Do we know Lily's actual age? I just highlight-hopped looking for it, but struck out.

Sucks to have a 50 year-old face and a 20 year-old prefrontal cortex either way, but now I'm curious.

 

[squirreltail]

Do we know Lily's actual age? I just highlight-hopped looking for it, but struck out.

Sucks to have a 50 year-old face and a 20 year-old prefrontal cortex either way, but now I'm curious.

She's 40 (born 1981 per online library catalog).

So I mean props to Joe for dating someone age appropriate?

 

[Carnavoyeur]

After seeing that picture @NopeNoJustNo linked to I can say without hesitation that Lily screams "midlife crisis" louder than Fay Wray in Kong Kong's grip.

 

[Dromedary]

Lol, Joe Cunt is dying to divorce Mallory and hit the singles' scene in his yenta mummuu.

Joe thinks he's "new money". What money? Where did it come from? His UC salary is generous, but. He's horribly gauche in all things.

This burns my ass the most. Joe is a failed male, a heterosexual cross-dressing autogynephile and tap-dancing freak. Someone with a penis married to someone with a vagina. The way he appropriates gay and lesbian lived experience as his own, then simultaneously sound like the most homophobic right-winger is just appalling and incredible. He constantly does this. Joe Lavery is a total enemy of gay and lesbian people.

"Our". Fuck you, Joe. Homosexuality, being gay, IS actually a protected class against discrimination in the UK, and in the US, recent broad judgments in law by the Supreme Court have given broad civil protections to gay people, in the workplace and elsewhere. It's REALLY bizarre how Joe harps on this. That women have NO especial rights (in the UK they do, at the UN they do), and gay people deserve NO rights "based on sexual orientation"- but freedom from discrimination is based on sex,including homosexuality, there actually ARE such things. Jesus, he sounds like the worst homophobe on Earth-" Homosexuality isn't a legal entitlement, thank God". No one said it was an entitlement.

Why is he so invested in constantly saying, "women and gays technically have no rights in law"? Because he's constantly saying it.

Joe Lavery is just a vicious straight heterosexual male homophobe. Like a lot of "liberals" secretly are.

(Ps. I hate myself and apologize for using that dreary formulation "appropriates..lived experience", like some undergrad with more than a deep tan researching how they can best exploit their made-up victimhood in Scarsdale, but it fit there.)

 

[Potatis Salad]

The Guardian publishes an interview with a butch feminist sociologist named Finn Mackay. Here is an excerpt showing Mackay's RAMPANT TRANSMISOGYNY thoughtful and reasonable opinions:

Does that mean single-sex services should be allowed to exclude trans people in some circumstances? In a world where the bigger issue is that there aren’t enough refuge places full stop, Mackay says, “if some women have got together and are running a refuge or outreach and they say they’re exclusive of trans women, I would not make it my life’s work to close that place down. I would think there should be options.”

Mallory responds with a few mini-meltdowns on Twitter:


...and follows up with a barely-coherent Substack entry attempting to take down Mackay. This is Mallory speaking sarcastically in the voice of Mackay:

I do. I really do. I understand everything. I understand transition because I thought about doing it and decided against it. I heard about all the bad complications, and I didn’t do it, so I know what someone who doesn’t do it knows, and I also know what someone who does do it knows, so I know twice as much as trans people about transition. And the very sad, very gentle, very soft truth is that if you imagine a trans woman who’s very very tall, say fifty feet tall, who’s shutting down all the domestic violence shelters in the country, then that’s just not very right indeed, I’m afraid.

A troon heads over to Twitter to correctly tell Mallory that she (Mallory) was unfair to Mackay:


Mallory responds with a massive overreaction that is dripping with condescension. An almost Joe-caliber performance:


Mallory, a true and honest man bravely battling transmisogyny wherever she finds it!


A strong, manly paterfamilias bent on protecting "his'" "women" (lol):