11/06/2021 Ethan Ralph Totaled His Car - Hard to drive with hooves.

  • 🔧 At about Midnight EST I am going to completely fuck up the site trying to fix something.

Cause of the wreck?

  • The other driver.

    Votes: 18 1.9%
  • Ralph was under the influence.

    Votes: 100 10.7%
  • Ralph was reading KF on his phone.

    Votes: 270 28.9%
  • Ralph was under the influence AND reading KF on his phone.

    Votes: 524 56.1%
  • Driving with hooves is hard.

    Votes: 169 18.1%
  • Ralph was letting the gunt drive.

    Votes: 204 21.8%
  • Lost control while sharting.

    Votes: 287 30.7%

  • Total voters
    934
  • Poll closed .
Holy shit that's a bad hit.

The only reason he's fine is because he already almost looks like that weird statue of the Car Crash Man.

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I actually do hope everyone is okay from the accident. Car wrecks are really something I don't find very funny, regardless of who.
That said, Ethan I hope they malpractice your ass at the hospital.
I agree. I'm especially thankful that May wasn't in the car, as Gunt said. Not only would she certainly have died or become permanently injured, but she also would have lost the baby. No matter what you think about Gunt or the Peedoe, the child is innocent in all this.
 
dude that child won’t stand a chance. a spontaneous abortion would be divine intervention
Lol, honestly that is probably true. It's starting life fifty feet behind the starting line. I am seriously concerned for the child. I'm sure this isn't a new speculation but May offering to watch Faiths' child while she worked was a huge red flag to me. There's no way I can rationalize that except for her wanting unrestricted access to a child. I don't think that the babies death is the correct/fair remedy for the situation, however.
 
Nissans also have a ticking time bomb installed on them, their CVT transmissions. Those have had a history of failing way before 100k miles, and some of the worst ones they had, i.e. on the 2013 Altima, can only go 60k before grenading themselves. Nissan's CVTs stand out because other car's CVTs usually don't suffer the same catastrophic failures that Nissan's ones do.

And if you thought Nissan giving out Subprime loans was bad, Mitsubishi pretty much gives out car loans, if you have a pulse. Granted, their 0-0-0 promotion that they did in the early 2000s ($0 down, 0% interest, and 0 payments for 1 full year, I think) almost tanked the entire company, due to the sheer number of people defaulting on those said car loans.
Nissan transmissions are so bad they just doubled the warranty on them instead of trying to make them better or switching to something else.

Christ is Kang!
 
Ralph really just does not know when to shut the fuck up and stop digging his grave deeper.

Baked going full "uwu i was so afwaid" is understandable because even a dumbass like him doesn't want to end up in jail for doing something fucking stupid. Yet here Ralph is, poking the damn bear even after being granted the mercy of a continuance.

He is on such a level of wigger machismo that he thinks that he needs to be in full Jerry Springer mode 100% of the time, even when the law is guaranteed to give him an asskicking five ways from Sunday and he has a newborn daughter coming soon that he won't get to see grow up because he'll be in fucking jail.

Wiggers gonna fucking wig.
 
I don't think that the babies death is the correct/fair remedy for the situation, however.
it’s not being suffocated to death with a pillow, better it gets aborted before it’s even alive than get shaken to death or even worse look like whatever horrorific amalgamation of white trash genes it would inherit
 
Nissan transmissions are so bad they just doubled the warranty on them instead of trying to make them better or switching to something else.

Christ is Kang!

Nissan actually did change the transmissions on the new 2022 Pathfinder and Infiniti QX60, from the CVT on the previous generation ones, to the ZF 9HP transmission. So basically going from a junk transmission, to a slightly less junk one. (Although there have been reports that ZF ironed out most of the glitchy behavior that the older ZF 9HPs had.) It's going to be a while for them to change it on their passenger cars though, given that money is tight at Nissan.
 
How is this man still alive?

That is a genuine question, not me A logging. It's sort of fascinating. Ralph should of been long dead from the shit he put his body through; the drugs, the alcohol, the fast food, the fact he impregnated a 18 year old girl and the father owns a gun. He nearly had a heart attack this week by the sheer size of the man. Ralph should of slipped into a diabetic coma by now. It kind of impressive.

Ralph is either a cat or a stand user.
My schizo theory is that since Ralph has been fat almost his whole life his body is just used to the way it is. This applies to most fat niggas who are like this also. Since he had a minor heart attack at his young age he will most likely have another one down the line in the next few years. This is IF he stops being a gunted piggy bitch and turns his life around (impossible i know).

My Grandfather on my Dad's side ligit had fucking FOUR heart attacks in 12 years cause like Ralph, he had a big 'ol gunt and never did anything to improve (also smoked a fuckton). As funny as it is to see Ralph getting fucked by his own gunt, it's always sad to me seeing a big fellow like him just give up on improving themeselves physically.

Shitting (or in this case sharting) on Ralph is fun but deep down in my heart I just wanna see the guy get his shit together, cause there is going to be a point where the shenanigans will just stop being funny and just be sad, even though he brought it all on himself.
 
it’s not being suffocated to death with a pillow, better it gets aborted before it’s even alive than get shaken to death or even worse look like whatever horrorific amalgamation of white trash genes it would inherit
I'm probably being too serious considering the circumstances of the situation, but every life deserves a chance. No matter what farm animal their mother resembles, or the shart-status of their fathers' underwear.
 
Lol, honestly that is probably true. It's starting life fifty feet behind the starting line. I am seriously concerned for the child. I'm sure this isn't a new speculation but May offering to watch Faiths' child while she worked was a huge red flag to me. There's no way I can rationalize that except for her wanting unrestricted access to a child. I don't think that the babies death is the correct/fair remedy for the situation, however.
It's some sick cosmic joke that May got a female child, knowing her preferences in japanese pornography.
 
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