Inactive Richard "Lowtax" Kyanka - Deadbeat (emphasis on "Dead") founder of Something Awful, forced out of his own community, on his second divorce, stuck his dick in crazy, "Birth Giver"

He'd get a few years in a camp for that and the tax shit, and they'd modify his support order to reflect his new circumstances and work out a payment plan, but that wouldn't discharge the debt he already has. He'd come out of jail at the end of it with ~$100,000 owed in non-dischargeable child support and back taxes.

The support order he'd leave jail with would be something appropriate for a minimum wage employee or welfare recipient, and he'd be incapable of paying that. The courts would expect him to get a job or appear before a judge on a regular basis showing evidence that he's genuinely applying for jobs and not deliberately refusing to work, even though it should be obvious that lowtax was completely and utterly unemployable at this point in his life.

I think you're being a little optimistic with the speed and fairness of the justice system for pennyante things like this, especially for zero criminal record and non-public defender legal representation. Even a criminal deadbeat dad misdemeanor makes it hard to get a job and would be a last resort option only after he'd shown he was completely worthless and pulled a judge having a bad day.

Everything else is completely accurate. For a normal person, climbing out of the hole you dug yourself would be a huge set back and infuriating, but surmountable. For Lowtax, the realization he'd never return to the goldbelly-and-tranny-hooker lifestyle was too much to live with.

I want to specifically highlight this for its correctness
He was physically, mentally and emotionally incapable of living within the means of a millionaire, let alone a poor-people welfare payment, let alone a garnished fraction of a poor-people welfare payment.

It doesn't matter that he could get a computer toucher job, or some sort of management, maybe even use that addict charisma for sales, and pull in a comfortable income even after updated childsupport & judgements. Just comfortable wouldn't be enough for Lowtax, he needs to the means and freedom to drop all his responsibilities and fly to Utah for a month to sniff BPD mormon feet. Having some 9-5 wouldn't permit that.
 
I mean how do you spend 20 years running such a huge website and never get beyond square one with sysadmin skills? He should've been a seasoned expert by now, and just that alone could get you 120-150k if you're willing to take a (nice, stable) corporate monkey job. Add in the alleged "management" skills (hahaha) and the industry contacts (oops he alienated all of them), this mf should've been able to land somewhere as "Director of Digital Strategy" or similar title years ago, making 200-300k+.
If you leverage owning a 13 million dollar asset into being a corporate wageslave your financial decision-making is just as bad as Richard's.

I think you're being a little optimistic with the speed and fairness of the justice system for pennyante things like this, especially for zero criminal record and non-public defender legal representation.
Normally yes, but when the child is in another country it makes all of America look like a deadbeat dad, and federal courts actually care about shit like that. It'd still be years down the line, but it'd be pretty inevitable he'd catch a federal felony charge once his arrears tipped over the limit.
 
He honestly thought being a zany dipshit could paper over glaring faults about himself and that he could coast through life with that same zany dipshit persona
Lots of that going around with genX and genY, and zoomies look like they are gonna break the record
It is very sad that whoever tries to sell that house will have to deal with the property values declining after a violent suicide. And in this flush market!
I would buy a house where some wacko chainsawed a bunch of babies if the price its low enough............and its been cleaned
 
How much can the state actually garnish for child support if you have no assets and aren't pulling in much cash? Does it actually fuck you in the sense that you can go to jail for not being able to pay what you don't have?
Do you mean on paper or in reality? In the strict theoretical sense, how it is supposed to work is if your circumstances change, your child support obligation is also supposed to change. In the real world, and let's just say, the particular real world where you're an absolute piece of shit who deliberately squandered six figures that should have gone to your kids on drugs and tranny hookers, and blew that shit all over the planet in your social media, and just deliberately didn't get a job in order to fuck over your kids, a judge could spend years deliberating over whether your circumstances were actually changed.

Also just because I like this.
lowtax-sucking-sausage.jpg

I wonder if he sucked on the gun like this.
 
If you leverage owning a 13 million dollar asset into being a corporate wageslave your financial decision-making is just as bad as Richard's.
Ha! Touché. No I meant more like, after the writing was on the wall and things started to go south, even after the divorce, that could've been a way out IF he actually had the marketable skills that he thought he did. Kind of a moot point though, if he was really that good and that smart, he would've taken that $13 mil and moved on to other ventures, maybe co-found some startup or something. Just imagine, today instead of FaceBook, it could've been GoonBook. :story:


Also just because I like this.
View attachment 2747761
I wonder if he sucked on the gun like this.
You mean like this? lol
Lowtax - Meatstick Gun.png
 
Ha! Touché. No I meant more like, after the writing was on the wall and things started to go south, even after the divorce, that could've been a way out IF he actually had the marketable skills that he thought he did. Kind of a moot point though, if he was really that good and that smart, he would've taken that $13 mil and moved on to other ventures, maybe co-found some startup or something. Just imagine, today instead of FaceBook, it could've been GoonBook. :story:
Hell, just investing some of that $13 mil into some Facebook shares would have had him financially set for life.

Oh, hell, he should have gone full mukbang. He was hinting at that with his sausage eating and hotdog eating. He should've kept trying to start a beef with the incredible nicocado avocado guy, and got fat enough to eat for free at that las vegas heart attack restaurant. Stream eating there as a big fat fuck every day.
Get fat or go trans. Either way, we would have had laughs for years to come. Could you imagine Troontax? :story:
 
What was the "spine" stuff he went through exactly? I've had a couple herniated discs, one requiring surgery, and know firsthand that nerve damage is no joke. I could see how that would contribute to his hopeless despair in the end.
 
What was the "spine" stuff he went through exactly?

It was never a consistent story. "Crumbling discs", with periphereal neuropathy, was the most common bit of spiel. Realistically, he was a sedentary middle aged dude with a pill habit and there was nothing wrong a bit of exercise, detox and yoga couldn't fix.

Coincidentally, this nebulous spine issue materialised the exact instance his Xenforo fundraiser put five figures up for grabs.
 
What was the "spine" stuff he went through exactly? I've had a couple herniated discs, one requiring surgery, and know firsthand that nerve damage is no joke. I could see how that would contribute to his hopeless despair in the end.
I don't believe he had spine problems other than just not having one.

It was just shit he said to get prescription drugs.
 
What was the "spine" stuff he went through exactly? I've had a couple herniated discs, one requiring surgery, and know firsthand that nerve damage is no joke. I could see how that would contribute to his hopeless despair in the end.
The spine stuff was whatever he needed it to be in order to get pity money, drugs, or to be left alone to sleep all day. They say he incurred the injury when he got trashed by Uwe Boll, it just took 10 years for the damage to manifest.
 
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