UK Bomb squad called to Gloucester Royal Hospital after man gets WW2 mortar stuck up his arse - ‘Tripped and fell on it’ apparently….

https://www.bristolpost.co.uk/news/bristol-news/bomb-squad-called-gloucestershire-royal-6298076

‘The bomb squad was called to Gloucestershire Royal Hospital on Thursday (December 2), after a patient was admitted with a mortar shell stuck in his rectum.

Troops from 11 Explosive Ordnance Disposal Regiment rushed to the Gloucester hospital after being notified by police "that a patient had presented with a munition in his rectum."

The man was a military enthusiast who found the shell while clearing out, but somehow "tripped" and fell onto the 57mm piece of army ordnance that landed him in hospital, according to The Sun.

The 57mm mortar round was used by the Royal Artillery in the Second World War as anti-tank rounds, though it would later also be used by British tanks in North Africa.

These rounds measure at 57mm in diameter and an eye-watering 170mm in length.

A source told The Sun: "The guy said he found the shell when he was having a clear out of his stuff.

"He said he put it on the floor then he slipped and fell on it — and it went up his a***."

The MoD said: “We can confirm an Army Explosive Ordnance Disposal team was called out to Gloucestershire at the request of local police.”

A spokesperson for Gloucestershire Hospitals NHS Foundation Trust said: "We can confirm that the police and Explosive Ordnance Disposal team (EOD) attended Gloucestershire Royal Hospital yesterday.

"As with any incident involving munitions, the relevant safety protocols were followed to ensure that there was no risk to patients, staff or visitors at any time."

The unsteady patient was released from hospital and is expected to make a full recovery, so long as he does not trip and fall onto any more artillery shells.’

Well, I think we can consider this an all time classic of the ‘I fell on it and it went up my arse’ genre.
 
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Lol yea an mortar shell just slipped into his arse in a perfect angle with no lubricant, fit in perfectly.

What was the research results saying about how too many Brits stick things up their arse and get it stuck? Truly can't be linked lol
 
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Ly Erg said:
Lol yea an mortar shell just slipped into his arse in a perfect angle with no lubricant, fit in perfectly.

What was the research results saying about how too many Brits stick things up their arse and get it stuck? Truly can't be linked lol
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I read in the paper it costs the NHS £350,000 a year to remove stuff from peoples arses. Brighton has much to answer for.
 
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Easterling said:
I read in the paper it costs the NHS £350,000 a year to remove stuff from peoples arses. Brighton has much to answer for.
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It was over a decade that amount but yeah, plenty of them. Men leading the way in terms of who is responsible.
www.dailymail.co.uk

Horny Brits cost the UK £350k a year by shoving items in their rectums

About 400 'foreign' objects are retrieved from British rectums per year a new analysis of NHS data has found. An embarrassing trip to A&E is not the only price with the issue costing the taxpayer £3million.
www.dailymail.co.uk www.dailymail.co.uk

NHS doctors have spent more than £3million extracting items out of rectums over the past decade, experts say.

Scientists analysed NHS records to determine how many 'manual removal of foreign body from rectum' procedures were conducted in NHS hospitals between 2010 and 2019.

They found doctors have had to remove 3,500 objects.

And the team claimed the trend — costing the NHS roughly £340,000 a year — is becoming more of a problem.

Critics today argued taxpayers would be 'uncomfortable' with the soaring number, and cost, of the accidents.

The study found the incidence of objects having to be removed from rectums is on the rise with cases particularly growing in men



The study found the incidence of objects having to be removed from rectums is on the rise with cases particularly growing in men
Nearly twice as many foreign objects (518) were removed in the final year of the study compared to 2010/11.

People most commonly shove objects into their rectum for sexual pleasure.

This is partly to do with the number of nerves in the anus making it highly sensitive, and for men can simulate the prostate, an erogenous part of the male reproductive system.

For women it can also indirectly stimulate parts of the vagina.


The report, by doctors from the Royal Wolverhampton Hospitals NHS Trust, did not name what objects Brits had used.

But over the years MailOnline has reported on people using toothbrushes, aerosol cans, toy figurines, and eggs in their pursuit of sexual pleasure.

The researchers speculated the rise of internet porn and, access to sex toys, may be behind the rise in cases by inspiring people to try the practise.

The researchers, led by Swati Bhasin, worked out the average anal extraction costs almost £850 per object.

People in their 20s were the most likely to get an object stuck in their rectum followed by people in their early 50s


People in their 20s were the most likely to get an object stuck in their rectum followed by people in their early 50s
This price tag incorporates the costs of performing the procedure, including such factors as anaesthetic drugs, the time of health staff and the hospital stay.

Men made up the vast majority of incidents, accounting for 85 per cent of the cases.

And the over 60s accounted for about one-in-six of the total cases according to the report published in the Royal College of Surgeons of England Annals.

Most of the foreign objects were able to be removed with the use of anaesthesia in about 24 hours, with only a small number of patients requiring hospital stays longer than a day.

But the procedures still consumed valuable NHS resources, the researchers argued .

They also note their figures may be an underestimation as they do not include data from private hospitals.

John O'Connell, chief executive of the thinktank TaxPayers' Alliance told MailOnline: 'Of course accidents happen.

'But taxpayers will be more than uncomfortable with the rising cost for these surgeries.'

A RCS spokesperson said: 'The intended audience of the Annals is surgeons, and the purpose of this article is to inform surgeons about one of the rarer operations that they may have to undertake in the course of their work.'

The insertion of objects into a rectum, also known as anal play, carries a number of risks.

As well as getting stuck objects, they can also potentially perforate the bowel which can be deadly as material from the digestive tract can spill into other parts of the body, causing an infection.

The NHS advises that anyone exploring anal play do so safely, and use an object with a flared base to prevent it from getting lost inside.
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Hot Cup of Joe said:
Homo : "I slipped and fell and it landed up my arse!"

Dr: "This story would be somewhat more believable if the British Army made their 57mm rounds with condoms attached.
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Honestly this seems to happen a lot. Seriously what's with people shoving random objects up their asses? They do make buttplugs and dildos for that you know.
 
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Duke Nukem said:
Honestly this seems to happen a lot. Seriously what's with people shoving random objects up their asses? They do make buttplugs and dildos for that you know.
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People who feel too shameful or worried about buying sex toys but will instead try random objects because they still want to try it essentially.

And also degenerates
 
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Ly Erg said:
Lol yea an mortar shell just slipped into his arse in a perfect angle with no lubricant, fit in perfectly.
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I guess it happens.
It's like when there's a lightbulb on the floor, you walk naked past it and slip on an invisible banana peel and as you fall on your ass, your butthole happens to be aiming for that lightbulb and hop, to the ER!
Strange things can happen if you have one of those old railing made of wood with a sphere at the end. Sometimes, people walk on that invisible banana peel...
 
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