Tabletop Community Watch

I have to admit, I still prefer the Warhammer orc gods.



And the 40K ork attitude to race:
I'm waiting for the supplement where a Salamanders Dreadnaught becomes the leader of an Ork mob.
 
Ironically, they'd actually have some point in kvetching about Orc = Black people if they actually cracked open Shadowrun, since that was an allegory in that game. But that's way too not-hip and cool mainstream.
in shadowrun it goes even further than that, it's not just orcs but pretty much every metahuman (sans elves ofc because they're pretty). turns out skin color suddenly isn't an issue anymore when it's humans vs metahumans. not that they'd get that point, but still.

For the record, I consider this to be the most cyberpunk thing out there right now..
akshually


 
I could never get down with 40K orcs. They can never decide if they are wacky soccer hooligans or psychopathic gore sadists and the tonal shifts are really jarring.
That's emblematic of 40K as a whole. They can't decide if they want a parody of fascism or a dark science fantasy where an authoritarian, military government is the only correct answer to the problems facing humanity.

Take this trailer for the new edition of the Tabletop game, for instance:


And then compare it to their statement about how the Imperium is evil:


"There are no goodies in the Warhammer 40,000 universe.

None.

Especially not the Imperium of Man.

Its numberless legions of soldiers and zealots bludgeon their way across the galaxy, delivering death to anyone and anything that doesn’t adhere to their blinkered view of purity. Almost every man and woman toils in misery either on the battlefield – where survival is measured in hours – or in the countless manufactorums and hive slums that fuel the Imperial war machine. All of this in slavish servitude to the living corpse of a God-Emperor whose commandments are at best only half-remembered, twisted by time and the fallibility of Humanity.

Warhammer 40,000 isn’t just grimdark. It’s the grimmest, darkest.

The Imperium of Man stands as a cautionary tale of what could happen should the very worst of Humanity’s lust for power and extreme, unyielding xenophobia set in. Like so many aspects of Warhammer 40,000, the Imperium of Man is satirical."

You get mixed messages between the two. On the one hand, the Imperium is the only thing keeping mankind alive, on the other, it's the typical "fascist man bad" spiel, with the Imperium as fascists. But the question stands: if they're keeping mankind alive in a hostile, unforgiving universe, how can they be the bad guys? Surely anything is better than total annihilation at the hands of the aliens, heretics, and daemons?

In the same vein, with the Orks, they can't decide if these guys are brutal, sadistic monsters akin to Space Huns, or just goofball soccer hooligans that are the comic relief of the series. It's hard to laugh when your version of comic relief ends up being just as sadistic, if not more sadistic, than the yahoos who sacrifice human lives to heathen gods on both the Imperium and Chaos sides.
 
But the question stands: if they're keeping mankind alive in a hostile, unforgiving universe, how can they be the bad guys?
Because aside from maybe the Drukhari (and that's only in cruelty, not numbers), the Necrons perhaps too, the Imperium abuses and kills off it's own people worse than it's purported enemies, and not all of it's enemies are genocidal. The Nids are, but that's on account of them being animals needing to eat and survive, not malice. Hate, cruelty, ect aren't even concepts to them. The Greenskins are just in it for the fighting and that's all, and ironically one of the best ways to thwart them is not give them what they want. Chaos could be said to, but it's more in service to unspeakable beings who want to warp more than annihilate. The Eldar are more aloof than murderous. Yea, if you're in the way of a planet with soulstones, sucks to be you, but they aren't roaming about torching human worlds just for being there.

Gamesworkshop's ass has been confused for a LONG time. Maybe it's just the symptom of having so many authors, I dunno.
 
That's emblematic of 40K as a whole. They can't decide if they want a parody of fascism or a dark science fantasy where an authoritarian, military government is the only correct answer to the problems facing humanity.

[ ... ]

In the same vein, with the Orks, they can't decide if these guys are brutal, sadistic monsters akin to Space Huns, or just goofball soccer hooligans that are the comic relief of the series. It's hard to laugh when your version of comic relief ends up being just as sadistic, if not more sadistic, than the yahoos who sacrifice human lives to heathen gods on both the Imperium and Chaos sides.

I don't have much issue with the other races in 40K because most of the others are straight satire. The Imperium can be a horrible meatgrinder that due to bureaucratic mismanagment and petty power struggles needlessly sacrifices trillions of human lives every day, and also better than the alternative. There's no tonal shifts - plot holes and logical inconsistencies, yes. But no "Millions of psykers are sacrificed to keep the emperor in his state of non-quite death. But every thursday, the Praetorian Guard break out the calliope, Emperor puts on whiteface and a rubber nose and does a clown act, and every psyker is permitted to hit him in the face with a pie or squirt him with an over pressurized seltzer bottle before their lifeforce is drained to power the golden throne".

Satire can be dark because its internally 'serious' - Satire is a thing taken to extremes.

But the Orcs are not always satire, and often falls into parody, where its not supposed to be able Space Huns, its funny soccer hooligans trading teeth looking for a fight. Its supposed to be funny and not internally consistent with any inconsistencies addressed quickly in the most Hooligan-logic manner - which is fine until they suddenly tonally shift back to Grim Dark Satire.

It'd be like if Airplane! suddenly had one of the wacky skits result in two planes crashing and we're shown people being torn apart in the explosion and anyone who doesn't die immediately burning as they plummet 10,000 feet to the ground.

Because aside from maybe the Drukhari (and that's only in cruelty, not numbers), the Necrons perhaps too, the Imperium abuses and kills off it's own people worse than it's purported enemies, and not all of it's enemies are genocidal. The Nids are, but that's on account of them being animals needing to eat and survive, not malice. Hate, cruelty, ect aren't even concepts to them. The Greenskins are just in it for the fighting and that's all, and ironically one of the best ways to thwart them is not give them what they want. Chaos could be said to, but it's more in service to unspeakable beings who want to warp more than annihilate. The Eldar are more aloof than murderous. Yea, if you're in the way of a planet with soulstones, sucks to be you, but they aren't roaming about torching human worlds just for being there.

I'm not disagreeing with you on the setting is clearly supposed to have the forces running the Imperium make it nearly as bad as the things they are fighting.

GWS addresses this in their own lore where its heavily implied that if someone would let the Emperor die, he'd be reborn and in about two decades when he comes of age you'd have a full blown Emps going around, subjugating xeno ass and completely annihilating - not merely banishing - chaos demons. But they also state that if that happened, between civil war and external threats, Humankind would be extinct in less than 10.

- Nids have a hive mind and Genestealers. They used to have diplomatic corps until GWS decided to drop the models because they weren't selling well they rebelled. Its not dumb animals. But they are 100% consistent in their goal of getting food to the swarm & everything that isn't 'Nid being food (and a lot of the things that are 'nid also being food).
- Orcs are sometimes just for fighting. Sometimes they are just destroying and murdering people in horrible ways just because. I don't have a problem with Hooligans following their team and looking for the best fight with things they built in a cave out of scraps, and I don't have a problem with murderous space huns grimdarkly slaughtering and enslaving their way across the galaxy. But pick one.
- Chaos is definitely about lots of murder and genocide. Skulls for the Skull throne my dude. But again, they are consistent.
- Eldar are all about protecting themselves and long-term good of themselves and fuck everyone else because they don't live long enough to matter. So I guess they've got a consistent narrative excuse when they switch modes (IT WAS ALL A PART OF KEIKAKU!) even if sometimes its pretty fucking flimsy, an attempt was made.

Gamesworkshop's ass has been confused for a LONG time.
QFT.
 
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It gets worse. These same faggots who say they don't want "fantasy" in their science fiction still jack it raw to sci-fi settings with psionics. You know, the store-brand Great Value version of magic for sci-fi settings. A few years ago I witnessed a Mass Effect fanboy having a complete meltdown when confronted with the fact the eponymous "mass effect" is, pure and simply, just Space Magic by any other name.
A lot of this is techbro mindset - you know, the type to write "Ring of darkness" andf other "muh sufficent technolofy" rewrites and "rational" fic. Male version of chick making down-to-earth coffeeshop AUs of everything.
Aka "boring faggots with no imagination to begin with".
 
Because aside from maybe the Drukhari (and that's only in cruelty, not numbers), the Necrons perhaps too, the Imperium abuses and kills off it's own people worse than it's purported enemies, and not all of it's enemies are genocidal.
I know, but you wouldn't know that if you looked at most of 40K's media outside of the older books. Even the newer books portray the Space Marines are heroes, because the newer crop of authors write them that way, to the consternation of old lore dudes like Rick Priestley who intentionally wrote in the Imperium as being worse than the enemies of mankind. Now, the Space Marines, Sisters of Battle, and every special force outfit in the Imperium is just 50 different shades of Iron Man, the Punisher, and Black Widow, running around with medieval symbols on their armor.

The Nids are, but that's on account of them being animals needing to eat and survive, not malice. Hate, cruelty, ect aren't even concepts to them. The Greenskins are just in it for the fighting and that's all, and ironically one of the best ways to thwart them is not give them what they want. Chaos could be said to, but it's more in service to unspeakable beings who want to warp more than annihilate. The Eldar are more aloof than murderous. Yea, if you're in the way of a planet with soulstones, sucks to be you, but they aren't roaming about torching human worlds just for being there.
They don't tackle the fact that the Imperium does not fight its enemies in a rational, innovative manner, because of their superstitions about advancing technology and adapting things to the circumstances. They go with battle doctrines and codexes that are thousands of years old. Any space empire worth its salt would have genocided most of the xenos and Chaos forces by now. The Imperium COULD, if they advanced their technologies, but they didn't, because of dogma, and so, they're stuck in a perpetual Dark Ages where most of their people live below sustenance levels and are being worked to the bone producing war goods or getting drafted to become common cannon fodder.

Gamesworkshop's ass has been confused for a LONG time. Maybe it's just the symptom of having so many authors, I dunno.
They want the Imperium to be a satire of fascism, but they make the Imperium look badass, give them all the cool toys, and make them the protagonists of the franchise. So of course, people will excuse away their flaws and go rooting for the empire, especially when the guys they root for look like a mix of Iron Man, Kratos, and Medieval Crusaders, accompanied by nuns with guns.

I don't have much issue with the other races in 40K because most of the others are straight satire. The Imperium can be a horrible meatgrinder that due to bureaucratic mismanagment and petty power struggles needlessly sacrifices trillions of human lives every day, and also better than the alternative. There's no tonal shifts - plot holes and logical inconsistencies, yes. But no "Millions of psykers are sacrificed to keep the emperor in his state of non-quite death. But every thursday, the Praetorian Guard break out the calliope, Emperor puts on whiteface and a rubber nose and does a clown act, and every psyker is permitted to hit him in the face with a pie or squirt him with an over pressurized seltzer bottle before their lifeforce is drained to power the golden throne".

Satire can be dark because its internally 'serious' - Satire is a thing taken to extremes.

But the Orcs are not always satire, and often falls into parody, where its not supposed to be able Space Huns, its funny soccer hooligans trading teeth looking for a fight. Its supposed to be funny and not internally consistent with any inconsistencies addressed quickly in the most Hooligan-logic manner - which is fine until they suddenly tonally shift back to Grim Dark Satire.

It'd be like if Airplane! suddenly had one of the wacky skits result in two planes crashing and we're shown people being torn apart in the explosion and anyone who doesn't die immediately burning as they plummet 10,000 feet to the ground.
Again, it's because GW's authors are not all in concert. Some want the Orks to be a realistic component of this Grimdark universe, that they're just another unforgiving facet of this dark and grim storyline, while other authors want them to be goofball soccer fans who go nuts when the wrong team wins or loses. They can't find a balance between the two; it's not like, say, Star Wars, where the comic relief is stuck to several joke characters like Jar-Jar and Threepio, while someone like Darth Vader or Count Dooku are dead serious when they're talking, let alone when they're fighting.

I mean, heck, I encountered this inconsistency when I played the Space Marine game, 3/5ths of which was just Ork Shooter 9000. It's jarring to have these goofball soccer hooligans as the bad guys, then hearing through the audio logs and looking around the ruins of manufactorums and seeing how brutal and cruel they can be. I don't know if the game just wants to be "BOLTER GO BRRRR" the videogame, or a dark story where you see common humans stretched to their limits while the gods arrive too late to save them.

I'm not disagreeing with you on the setting is clearly supposed to have the forces running the Imperium make it nearly as bad as the things they are fighting.
The original setting wanted the Imperium to be WORSE than the guys you're fighting. I mean, at least the Chaos and Xenos forces are honest about wanting to kill you, and they often do it quick unless you're dealing with the Dark Eldar, but the Imperium will lie to your face and promise you salvation, while slowly working you to death or sending you to die as cannon fodder for their armies.

GWS addresses this in their own lore where its heavily implied that if someone would let the Emperor die, he'd be reborn and in about two decades when he comes of age you'd have a full blown Emps going around, subjugating xeno ass and completely annihilating - not merely banishing - chaos demons. But they also state that if that happened, between civil war and external threats, Humankind would be extinct in less than 10.
Wouldn't the Emperor dying lead to his soul being released into the warp and becoming a fifth Chaos god that protects the humans?

A lot of this is techbro mindset - you know, the type to write "Ring of darkness" andf other "muh sufficent technolofy" rewrites and "rational" fic. Male version of chick making down-to-earth coffeeshop AUs of everything.
Aka "boring faggots with no imagination to begin with".
Basically, this is the result of the "rational" skeptic crowd wanting to have what fantasy stories have, without having to kowtow and surrender their "scientific" or "rational" ideologies by acknowledging the existence of supernatural beings. It's the same arrogance that Star Trek TNG had, to have a character like Picard who looks at the supernatural as if it's nothing but superstition, while having characters like Q run around doing magic shit that isn't "technically" magic. At least other series like Transformers, Star Wars, and Warhammer 40K are honest with the fact that magic exists in their universes, while other sci-fi like Mass Effect and Starcraft have more nuanced approaches to faith.
 
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@LORD IMPERATOR

I don't see too much inconsistency in the Spehce Mahrehns being heroic while the Imperium, specifically the Administratium (and Inquisitorium), being incompetent to the point of evil.
The Space Marines are trying to hold back the tide of evil, its just their bosses suck and often caused the evil they are fighting to exist.

It fits nicely into the Grim Dark setting, where if only the Imperial Bureaucracy got its shit together for about 20 minutes, most of the horror of the universe would be dealt with. But the petty power squabbling keeps that from happening. I mean, look at the tales of any historical empire in decay and you see the same thing, the nobles ensure the collapse rather than give up a fraction of their power and privileges.
The fact the nobles are authoring their own demise doesn't negate the heroism of the garrison commanders trying to keep the Barbarians from ripping open the gates for another day. It just makes it sort of tragic, but again, Grim Dark. They told you what you were signing up for.

I guess if you've ever cared enough to do a good job in a bureaucratically fucked company, you read about how the 40K imperium operates and are just "Oh yeah, I recognize this".
But its also a plot device to ensure that no matter how glorius your victory (or crushing your defeat) in your table-top games, nothing ever really changes. If the Orcs win, eventually a battle fleet arrives with enough guys with flashlights to force most of them off world, and a bunch of serfs to reoccupy the hives. If you defeat the orcs, you can be certain that some local governor will call you back so that there are still orcs feed the more troublesome hivescum to.


And no one knows what happens if you unplug Emp's life support. Alpha Legion definitely believes that if they do it, Emps will become the God their primarch always knew he could be.
I guess if we're going to take the most beneficial view, which is Emps reincarnates into the chaos whomping scion of order, it doesn't matter because the universe won't live long enough for him to grow up to use his powers.
 
@LORD IMPERATOR

I don't see too much inconsistency in the Spehce Mahrehns being heroic while the Imperium, specifically the Administratium (and Inquisitorium), being incompetent to the point of evil.
The Space Marines are trying to hold back the tide of evil, its just their bosses suck and often caused the evil they are fighting to exist.

It fits nicely into the Grim Dark setting, where if only the Imperial Bureaucracy got its shit together for about 20 minutes, most of the horror of the universe would be dealt with. But the petty power squabbling keeps that from happening. I mean, look at the tales of any historical empire in decay and you see the same thing, the nobles ensure the collapse rather than give up a fraction of their power and privileges.
The fact the nobles are authoring their own demise doesn't negate the heroism of the garrison commanders trying to keep the Barbarians from ripping open the gates for another day. It just makes it sort of tragic, but again, Grim Dark. They told you what you were signing up for.

I guess if you've ever cared enough to do a good job in a bureaucratically fucked company, you read about how the 40K imperium operates and are just "Oh yeah, I recognize this".
So basically, it's like the idea of the Clean Wehrmacht that's been going around in historical debating circles, where the Wehrmacht was just an army defending Germany from its enemies, while it was the SS and the political apparatus that was gassing and liquidating undesirables and doing all the nasty shit the Third Reich did. The idea also implies that if you replaced Hitler and his inner cabal with Prussian generals and aristocrats who are more practical and tolerant when it comes to war and ruling, they'd have won WW2.

The problem with that theory is that the Space Marines themselves are akin to the Waffen SS of the Imperium-a military within the military that enforces the Fuhrer's rule-or in this case, the Emperor's regime. They don't just eradicate hostile house pests like the Orks or the Tyranids, they would even go after the Tau and eradicate humans rebelling against the corrupt Administratum and Inquisitorium. Some Space Marines even work alongside the Inqusition, like the Grey Knights and the Black Templars. So they not only fight for this corrupt establishment, they even enforce it against their own kind DESPITE its corruption.

If they were truly noble, the Space Marines would have overthrown or at least cleaned up both the Administratum and the Inquisitorium, and some of the High Lords of Terra would be Space Marines from chapters relating to their work, or someone appointed by the Space Marine chapter masters after severe quality testing. For example, the Master of the Adeptus Administratum would be an Ultramarine. The Representative of the Inquisition would be a Grey Knight. The Ecclesiarch of the Adeptus Ministorum would be a Black Templar. All the while, the Adeptus Custodes would be the ones interpreting the will of the Emperor and bringing his commands to the lords.

But its also a plot device to ensure that no matter how glorius your victory (or crushing your defeat) in your table-top games, nothing ever really changes. If the Orcs win, eventually a battle fleet arrives with enough guys with flashlights to force most of them off world, and a bunch of serfs to reoccupy the hives. If you defeat the orcs, you can be certain that some local governor will call you back so that there are still orcs feed the more troublesome hivescum to.
That's what turned me off from 40K's story. All these stories of struggles, battles, and wars, and it's all pointless in the end, because the status quo is God to them. The same disease afflicted comics before the SJWs moved in, which was why they were steadily decreasing in popularity when compared to manga and anime even before the SJWs took over Marvel and DC.

And no one knows what happens if you unplug Emp's life support. Alpha Legion definitely believes that if they do it, Emps will become the God their primarch always knew he could be.
I guess if we're going to take the most beneficial view, which is Emps reincarnates into the chaos whomping scion of order, it doesn't matter because the universe won't live long enough for him to grow up to use his powers.
I suppose they could always make a second Emperor. Like say, have thosuands of psykers rounded up and sacrificed to make another one while the original sits on the Golden Throne. You can even have Guilliman be his foster-father and teach him the tricks of the trade of protecting the galaxy and running the Imperium, then when he comes of age, Guilliman will give him the original Emperor's flaming sword, and tell him to face his destiny.
 
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So basically, it's like the idea of the Clean Wehrmacht that's been going around in historical debating circles, where the Wehrmacht was just an army defending Germany from its enemies, while it was the SS and the political apparatus that was gassing and liquidating undesirables and doing all the nasty shit the Third Reich did. The idea also implies that if you replaced Hitler and his inner cabal with Prussian generals and aristocrats who are more practical and tolerant when it comes to war and ruling, they'd have won WW2.

It think its closer to a declining Rome, specifically the Persian frontier where Rome has to compete with the Persians, but also cooperate to keep out the barbarians. Its not just a head transplant, the entire bureaucracy is rotten and corrupt.

40K doesn't work with historical analogues because even if you remove all the more fantastic parts, the individual components are clearly based in history but they've never existed in that combination where you had so many players all at odds with each other, and no central authority. The closest you maybe come is the Warring States in china, but that was all interal chinese + the odd barbarian team up.
And as you said, everything is so status-quo focused... you don't see that in history except in very localized Euro skimmishes, and even then there's an authority keeping everyone somewhat in line.

The problem with that theory is that the Space Marines themselves are akin to the Waffen SS of the Imperium-a military within the military that enforces the Fuhrer's rule-or in this case, the Emperor's regime. They don't just eradicate hostile house pests like the Orks or the Tyranids, they would even go after the Tau and eradicate humans rebelling against the corrupt Administratum and Inquisitorium. Some Space Marines even work alongside the Inqusition, like the Grey Knights and the Black Templars. So they not only fight for this corrupt establishment, they even enforce it against their own kind DESPITE its corruption.

If they were truly noble, the Space Marines would have overthrown or at least cleaned up both the Administratum and the Inquisitorium, and some of the High Lords of Terra would be Space Marines from chapters relating to their work, or someone appointed by the Space Marine chapter masters after severe quality testing. For example, the Master of the Adeptus Administratum would be an Ultramarine. The Representative of the Inquisition would be a Grey Knight. The Ecclesiarch of the Adeptus Ministorum would be a Black Templar. All the while, the Adeptus Custodes would be the ones interpreting the will of the Emperor and bringing his commands to the lords.

I sort of view the Space Marines as the Holy Orders they are clearly aping. They don't get involved in politics. They hammer the mess and move on. Though they have their own skeletons in closet, though almost universally its just the skulls, arranged in a vaguely chair-like configuration...

And that's been addressed (sort of ) by the double factors that 1) there's something like only 16 million space marines, total. and 2) The space marines are no longer exactly human. They are too mission-focused to be good at state building. Only the Primarchs were meant to lead normal humanity through sheer charisma, and we were fresh out of Primarchs until recently.

That's what turned me off from 40K's story. All these stories of struggles, battles, and wars, and it's all pointless in the end, because the status quo is God to them. The same disease afflicted comics before the SJWs moved in, which was why they were steadily decreasing in popularity when compared to manga and anime even before the SJWs took over Marvel and DC.

Agreed. As a SETTING for a wargame, I generally like 40K. There are reasons for any army to fight any army, reasons for any army to team up with any other army, there are reasons for any army combination to fight any other army combination. I even like a fair bit of the lore, and how they address the technological stagnation. Its all retcon & justification for business decisions, but I feel they good job. As a game setting, its good.

But I can never get into the novels because as you said, everything is completely pointless and grim dark.

I suppose they could always make a second Emperor. Like say, have thosuands of psykers rounded up and sacrificed to make another one while the original sits on the Golden Throne. You can even have Guilliman be his foster-father and teach him the tricks of the trade of protecting the galaxy and running the Imperium, then when he comes of age, Guilliman will give him the original Emperor's flaming sword, and tell him to face his destiny.

I believe the problem with the second Emperor, because IIRC there is an imperial sub-faction trying to gather enough psyker souls to do just that, was you still end up splitting the Imperium in half in civil war. And now instead of dealing with whatever spare manpower the ruinious forces have after clobbering each other, the chaos gods would recognize the imminent threat, uniting and taking over the half the imperium.
I don't follow 40K very closely, but the last update I saw was they're already hinting that Guilliman not being a 24/7 raging cockbag is causing issues with the Administratum and straining the Imperium to the breaking point.
 
It think its closer to a declining Rome, specifically the Persian frontier where Rome has to compete with the Persians, but also cooperate to keep out the barbarians. Its not just a head transplant, the entire bureaucracy is rotten and corrupt.
So yes, they have a lot in common with the Jedi, who fight to protect the people from enemies and the Dark Side, but they cannot fix the weakness within the Republic government and all the corruption because they've sworn to uphold the Republic, even if it was corrupt.

40K doesn't work with historical analogues because even if you remove all the more fantastic parts, the individual components are clearly based in history but they've never existed in that combination where you had so many players all at odds with each other, and no central authority. The closest you maybe come is the Warring States in china, but that was all interal chinese + the odd barbarian team up.
The thing is, 40K invites historical analogues, with things like the Inquisition hearkening back to Renaissance Spain, as well as Commissars and Space Nazis which hearken back to Nazi Germany and the Soviet Union. I suppose the Imperium is just a more dysfunctional, pagan version of the Holy Roman Empire, complete with internal warring states and knightly orders like the Teutonic Knights.

And as you said, everything is so status-quo focused... you don't see that in history except in very localized Euro skimmishes, and even then there's an authority keeping everyone somewhat in line.
That's why I didn't really get that invested in 40K's story. What's the point of all these conflicts and getting invested in them, when it barely changes a damn thing? It's also why I grew bored of comics even before the SJWs come in, because eventually, something stupid happens like Superboy Prime punching reality and turning things back to normal.

I sort of view the Space Marines as the Holy Orders they are clearly aping. They don't get involved in politics. They hammer the mess and move on. Though they have their own skeletons in closet, though almost universally its just the skulls, arranged in a vaguely chair-like configuration...
As for me, I said it before, I view them more like a mix of Iron Man, the Punisher, and medieval knights. Essentially, they're like superheroes; they come to fix things, but they don't get involved in governing outside of governing micro-nations.

And that's been addressed (sort of ) by the double factors that 1) there's something like only 16 million space marines, total. and 2) The space marines are no longer exactly human. They are too mission-focused to be good at state building. Only the Primarchs were meant to lead normal humanity through sheer charisma, and we were fresh out of Primarchs until recently.
There's only 1 million Space Marines, but I'm sure they have billions of Guardsmen and navy soldiers underneath their control within their own private feudal states. That, and I'm sure they have lots of supporters from within the regular army and navy who would support a coup. Heck, at this point, they can just tell the revived Guilliman that they'll back any reforms he'll pass, with a subtle indication that they're ready to help him wax the corrupt idiots within the Administratum and the Inquisition if those guys are dumb enough to rally against him.

Agreed. As a SETTING for a wargame, I generally like 40K. There are reasons for any army to fight any army, reasons for any army to team up with any other army, there are reasons for any army combination to fight any other army combination. I even like a fair bit of the lore, and how they address the technological stagnation. Its all retcon & justification for business decisions, but I feel they good job. As a game setting, its good.

But I can never get into the novels because as you said, everything is completely pointless and grim dark.
Yes, that pretty much sums it up. Warhammer 40K is excellent as a backdrop to justify having a setting in a wargame where any army can fight any army, although another setting can easily handwaive that by having allied factions engage in a civil war or in a training exercise. (Like how 343 Industries justified Spartans fighting Spartans in multiplayer as simulated wargames that were just military exercises)

The novels, not so much, because like with the comics, you know how it will end. It's just endlessly pointless and grimdark, and you're better off writing your own stories with it.

I believe the problem with the second Emperor, because IIRC there is an imperial sub-faction trying to gather enough psyker souls to do just that, was you still end up splitting the Imperium in half in civil war. And now instead of dealing with whatever spare manpower the ruinious forces have after clobbering each other, the chaos gods would recognize the imminent threat, uniting and taking over the half the imperium.
Well, they can just rally behind the new Emperor anyways, although yes, if the guy does decide to wipe out the old Emperor and all his supporters, that would end with a very terrible civil war. One that the new Emperor will eventually win anyways, before he goes off to go "VENI, VIDI, VICI!" against the aliens and Chaos daemons. Sure, the Chaos forces might gain some ground during the civil war, but they will eventually lose it and get pushed out in the end before the new Emperor starts eradicating or castrating their top generals.

I don't follow 40K very closely, but the last update I saw was they're already hinting that Guilliman not being a 24/7 raging cockbag is causing issues with the Administratum and straining the Imperium to the breaking point.
That probably will end with a more "progressive" Imperium under Guilliman that goes with rational thinking and pragmatism defeating the more "dogmatic" Imperium that goes with racial and religious purity. I mean, that's probably the most likely route GW would take, considering they're trying to appease both the leftists who hate the Imperium because of "FASCIST MAN BAD", and the people who like the Space Marines for their aesthetics.

I originally thought that WAS the plan behind the Primaris Marines; I thought they were akin to the Nazi SS where the top guys insert them into the army to keep an eye on them and keep them loyal, that Guilliman is forcing the chapters to accept Primaris Marines so he can keep an eye on them and whack anyone within the Space Marine chapters that might have naughty ideas; and he placed them in just to purposefully provoke the traditionalists to revolt. And that maybe, Guilliman has a second army of Primaris Marines still under wraps, numbering in the billions, ready to force the more retrograde aspects of the Imperium's government to follow his reforms or face the wall, until the situation in Brotherly Terra has been "normalized".
 
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You two have gone further into this than I could, or would want to. All I have to say is that I see the contradictions more as compartmentalizations. The trailer video is for the consoomers, the 20-40yo manchildren who still think these OTT grimdark hardasses are the pinnacle of 'grown up' sci fi. The antifa spiel is for the opposite: the SJWs who don't buy anything, but who'll kick up an unholy stink on twitter. It's the 'please don't cancel us' grovelling to let them know that GW itself doesn't buy into the fetishism that they peddle to the space marine fanboys.

Orks, something similar. It's a matter of perspective. The happy go lucky soccer hooligans having a laugh is how the orks see themselves. The horror of the unending swarm of murderous, sadistic monsters is from the point of view of everyone else.

The Orks are the pinnacle of creation. For them, the great struggle is won. They have evolved a society which knows no stress or angst. Who are we to judge them? We Eldar who have failed, or the Humans, on the road to ruin in their turn? And why? Because we sought answers to questions that an Ork wouldn't even bother to ask! We see a culture that is strong and despise it as crude.

For some of us in the real world, the DGAF attitude of the orks is also a little bit of an antidote to just how seriously all the other factions take themselves, and how seriously some of the fanboys take it. Not so much laughing at torching half a hive city to death, as in some way acknowledging it's all just a silly game. The last vestige of the tongue in cheek aspect of it.

Also something something Tolkien orcs talking like Norf FC, reminiscing about the days of being petty bandits, even as they prepare to wipe Gondor off the map with fire and blood.
 
You two have gone further into this than I could, or would want to. All I have to say is that I see the contradictions more as compartmentalizations. The trailer video is for the consoomers, the 20-40yo manchildren who still think these OTT grimdark hardasses are the pinnacle of 'grown up' sci fi. The antifa spiel is for the opposite: the SJWs who don't buy anything, but who'll kick up an unholy stink on twitter. It's the 'please don't cancel us' grovelling to let them know that GW itself doesn't buy into the fetishism that they peddle to the space marine fanboys.
That's a great way to put it. The marketing department wants to reel in the superhero capeshit fans and the grimderp fans with trailers to make 40K look edgy and badass, while the IMPERIUM BAD message was to assuage the SJWs that GW doesn't buy into the very same Imperium fanboyism that they've profited off from.

Orks, something similar. It's a matter of perspective. The happy go lucky soccer hooligans having a laugh is how the orks see themselves. The horror of the unending swarm of murderous, sadistic monsters is from the point of view of everyone else.
So basically, the Orks are just yahoos 'avin a laugh, while everyone else sees the doom of their world, or at least, a sadistic, endless horde of shotgun-fodder.

For some of us in the real world, the DGAF attitude of the orks is also a little bit of an antidote to just how seriously all the other factions take themselves, and how seriously some of the fanboys take it. Not so much laughing at torching half a hive city to death, as in some way acknowledging it's all just a silly game. The last vestige of the tongue in cheek aspect of it.
Hell, it's mostly the Imperium fans that tend to be really serious. Especially the lore-nuts. Whereas the xenos and Chaos fans are mostly chill, but still waiting for an update from GW.
 
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Orks, something similar. It's a matter of perspective. The happy go lucky soccer hooligans having a laugh is how the orks see themselves. The horror of the unending swarm of murderous, sadistic monsters is from the point of view of everyone else.
I've also looked at it somewhat as who they're facing, since they're a heavily psionic race.

Against the Imperial Guard or local planetary militias? Murderous puckish rogue soccer hooligans.

Against the Astartes? Murderous sadistic monsters.
 
Orks, something similar. It's a matter of perspective. The happy go lucky soccer hooligans having a laugh is how the orks see themselves. The horror of the unending swarm of murderous, sadistic monsters is from the point of view of everyone else.

"The Orks are the pinnacle of creation. For them, the great struggle is won. They have evolved a society which knows no stress or angst. Who are we to judge them? We Eldar who have failed, or the Humans, on the road to ruin in their turn? And why? Because we sought answers to questions that an Ork wouldn't even bother to ask! We see a culture that is strong and despise it as crude."


For some of us in the real world, the DGAF attitude of the orks is also a little bit of an antidote to just how seriously all the other factions take themselves, and how seriously some of the fanboys take it. Not so much laughing at torching half a hive city to death, as in some way acknowledging it's all just a silly game. The last vestige of the tongue in cheek aspect of it.

Eh, fair. Again, for me its the weird tonal shift. Nothing wrong with a hooligan faction with hooligan dumb ass logic reasoning driving everything they do. Its just when they have the wacky hooligans suddenly talk about the horrible things they get up to, its a little jarring.

Also, no stress or angst? That knife ear is talking out his ass. You best be stressin' less you get krumped by another orc. Also, never talked to the gretchin.
 
Hell, it's mostly the Imperium fans that tend to be really serious. Especially the lore-nuts. Whereas the xenos and Chaos fans are mostly chill, but still waiting for an update from GW.
I was mainly a Squats fan. Last WH40k army proper I had was an artillery heavy Squat with IG allies for Epic scale.

How do you think I feel?
 
The thing is, 40K invites historical analogues, with things like the Inquisition hearkening back to Renaissance Spain, as well as Commissars and Space Nazis which hearken back to Nazi Germany and the Soviet Union. I suppose the Imperium is just a more dysfunctional, pagan version of the Holy Roman Empire, complete with internal warring states and knightly orders like the Teutonic Knights.
I originally thought that WAS the plan behind the Primaris Marines; I thought they were akin to the Nazi SS where the top guys insert them into the army to keep an eye on them and keep them loyal, that Guilliman is forcing the chapters to accept Primaris Marines so he can keep an eye on them and whack anyone within the Space Marine chapters that might have naughty ideas; and he placed them in just to purposefully provoke the traditionalists to revolt. And that maybe, Guilliman has a second army of Primaris Marines still under wraps, numbering in the billions, ready to force the more retrograde aspects of the Imperium's government to follow his reforms or face the wall, until the situation in Brotherly Terra has been "normalized".
you need to get either your projection or wehraboo in check, empire might be fascist but fascism isn't just MUH NAZEEHS.

primaris exist for two reasons: a) trademarked name no one else can copy b) new plastic shit to sell to suckers with a better statline. that's it. any lore or logic was just tacked on for the nerds that care about stuff like that.

as for the imperium, it's just your average dystopia in a grimdark setting, trying to shove it into an historical context is overthinking it to put it mildly. life in the empire sucks (depending which planet you're on), but it still beats ending up as nid fodder or a chaos sacrifice. it never progresses because progression is change, and change isn't always good. so all they do is try to stem the stagnation. the heroes are the ones who are successful but in the end don't change much, compared to noblebright where that success changes everything for the better.
some writers can weave a good story around it, most don't.

the bigger issue is the clash where fans come for the grimdark and edge and then ask for noblebright, and worse GW trying to cater to both instead of either committing to one or go back to conveniently ignoring most of it to sell more plastic like they did in the past.
 
you need to get either your projection or wehraboo in check, empire might be fascist but fascism isn't just MUH NAZEEHS.
No shit. Fascism was invented in Italy, the Nazis were just the German knockoff version of it.

Also, I spoke of the Clean Wehrmact as an idea, not a reality. Tons of war crimes were on their hands, especially in the early days before the SS stepped in to use gulags as a method of extermination.

primaris exist for two reasons: a) trademarked name no one else can copy b) new plastic shit to sell to suckers with a better statline. that's it. any lore or logic was just tacked on for the nerds that care about stuff like that.
All the new lore they added to it makes no sense, especially considering what they did with it. It could have just been true scale Space Marines or a taller version of power armor, which wouldn't be that revolutionary. Instead, they're all-new marines trained on Mars with all-new geneseeds that break the lore when added to other chapters. The only way it would have made sense is if Guilliman was placing watchdogs into the chapters to ensure their loyalty to the central government under his regime.

as for the imperium, it's just your average dystopia in a grimdark setting, trying to shove it into an historical context is overthinking it to put it mildly. life in the empire sucks (depending which planet you're on), but it still beats ending up as nid fodder or a chaos sacrifice. it never progresses because progression is change, and change isn't always good. so all they do is try to stem the stagnation. the heroes are the ones who are successful but in the end don't change much, compared to noblebright where that success changes everything for the better.
Games Workshop purposefully used the imagery of fascist nations and dictatorships to evoke a Nazi/Soviet feel for the Imperium. It's not just your average dystopia, it's a dystopia that, according to the makers themselves, has aspects of fascism and religious superstition, and it was a parody of both. They're basically a government run by self-deluded morons, if the OG 40K authors were to be trusted on the matter:

"To me the background to 40K was always intended to be ironic. The fact that the Space Marines were lauded as heroes within Games Workshop always amused me, because they're brutal, but they're also completely self-deceiving. The whole idea of the Emperor is that you don't know whether he's alive or dead. The whole Imperium might be running on superstition. There's no guarantee that the Emperor is anything other than a corpse with a residual mental ability to direct spacecraft. It's got some parallels with religious beliefs and principles, and I think a lot of that got missed and overwritten."

Rick Priestley, Warhammer 40K lore author and creator, December 2015 interview with Unplugged Games

some writers can weave a good story around it, most don't.
That's because most authors are trained to write stories where there are clear good and evil sides, with a beginning, middle, and end. 40K is a story where every faction involved are assholes, and there's no end in sight.

the bigger issue is the clash where fans come for the grimdark and edge and then ask for noblebright, and worse GW trying to cater to both instead of either committing to one or go back to conveniently ignoring most of it to sell more plastic like they did in the past.
GW originally just created a satire of fascism bordering on goofy just to sell plastic toys. I mean, look at this poster and tell me that the Space Marines weren't originally portrayed as fruit loops:

HomoMarines.jpg


They later decided to make it a serious, dystopian, dark science fantasy to reel in edgelords who were tired of the safe, sterile culture of the 90s. But now, they're trying to appeal to the noble-bright cape-shit fans who binge-watch Marvel flicks, so instead of a weakening Imperium wallowing in the dark, they now have a recovering Imperium, with innovations like the Primaris Marines and a possible alliance with aliens via Yvraine and the Ynnead Eldar, and of course, that pissed off the fans of the 90s 40K who want things to remain grimderp the whole way through.

GW has no real focus on audiences. It's just them turning 40K into something that will sell for the current generation, and if they can make a money changing the franchise to appeal to someone new down the road, they will do it. They abandoned the satire of the 80s 40K for the grimdark edginess which they sold in the 90s, and they abandoned that to make a superhero empire in space with the current iteration of 40K.
 
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