US Joe Biden News Megathread - The Other Biden Derangement Syndrome Thread (with a side order of Fauci Derangement Syndrome)

Let's pretend for one moment that he does die before the election, just for the funsies. What happens then? Will the nomination revert to option number 2, aka Bernie Sanders? Or will his running mate automatically replace him just the way Vice-President is supposted to step in after the Big Man in the White House chokes on a piece of matzo? Does he even have a running mate yet?

 

[Salubrious]

You know they say all men are created equal, but you look at me and you look at Donald Trump and you can see that statement is NOT TRUE! See, normally if you go one-on-one with another politician you got a fifty/fifty chance of winning. But I'm a genetic freak, and I'm not normal! So you got a 25 percent at best at beat me! And then you add Bernie Sanders to the mix? You-the chances of winning drasticy go down. See, the 3-Way in 2024, you got a 33 and a third chance of winning. But I! I got a 66 and two thirds chance of winning, cuz Bernie Sanders KNOOOWS he can't beat me, and he's not even gonna try. So, Donald Trump, you take your thirty three and a third chance minus my twenty five percent chance (if we was to go one on one) and you got an eight and a third chance of winning in 2024. But then you take my 75 perchance-chance of winnin' (if we was to go one on one), and then add 66 and two thirds…percents, I got a 141 2/3 chance of winning at Sacrifice! Señor Don? The numbers don't lie, and they spell disaster for you in 2024!

Scott Steiner is more coherent than Biden at this point.

 

[Celebrate Nite]

These reporters have to stop these idiotic "two part questions," because all Biden will ever do is pseudo-answer the easier question and pretend he never heard the one that was actually hard.

>Pretend he never heard the one that was actually hard
>Pretend
Real Talk: Only thing in that skull of his is Strawberry Jell-O. Even if he wanted to "pretend" he doesn't have the ability to.

 

[Gehenna]

What possible motivation would Jill have to throw her husband in a meat grinder like this? To make the nightmare end sooner and they can go back to retirement?

Fuck if I know, I am still processing the absolute shitshow that was. There was no period of ten minutes in there that wouldn't cripple a strong presidency, let alone what it would do to this one.

 

[ForTheHoard]

He says when you have all these employees, someone will always be screwing up, and the country is now moving in the right direction. "I don't know how we can say it's not."

Journo: do you plan to do anything differently, or are you satisfied with your team at the WH?

Biden: 3 things will do differently.

1) Get out of this place more often, go out and talk to the public, do public fora, interface with people to make the case for what we've already done and what will happen if they support what I want to do.
2) I want to bring in more advice from experts outside, from academia to editorial writers to think tanks to get their perspectives, seeking more input, more information, more constructive criticism about what I should be doing
3) Being in a situation where I will be deeply involved in these off-year elections. Raising a lot of money, helping candidates and go out and make the case in plain, simple language as to what we've done, what we want to do, and why we think it's important.


"How many more hours am I doing this? I'm happy to stick around..."

"You always ask me the nicest questions. Not all of them make a lot of sense to me, but..."

Journo: "Why are you trying so hard in your first year to pull the country so far to the left?"

"Well, I'm not, I don't know what you consider to be too far from the left...making sure we had money for covid, making sure we could provide for those things that would significantly reduce the burden on working class people...you guys are trying to convince me that I'm Bernie Sanders. I'm not a socialist, I'm a mainstream Democrat...48 of the 50 Democrats supported me in the Senate in virtually everything I have asked." That was it, that was his whole answer.

More advice from experts outside...

...academia... editorial writers... think tanks...

Where are they getting their expert advice now?

 

[The Last Stand]

What possible motivation would Jill have to throw her husband in a meat grinder like this? To make the nightmare end sooner and they can go back to retirement?

They hate each other.

 

[Gehenna]

More advice from experts outside...

...academia... editorial writers... think tanks...

Where are they getting their expert advice now?

CNN, no seriously. It is who they are using as their political analysis firm.

 

[The Last Stand]

Where are they getting their expert advice now?

I'm an expert on the side.

 

[Some Badger]

Can't wait to watch Pete Buttigieg suddenly become the face of this administration as Biden's handlers realize replacing Diamond Joe with Kamala resonates even worse than this presser.

Bye bye black vote!

Muslims too, probably.

 

[Jet Fuel Johnny]

What. The fuck. Did I. Just. Watch?

If I was a foreign leader I would be abso-lutely fucking panicking.

You don't know what this senile motherfucker is going to say or do, you don't know if he even understands the words he's saying, you don't know what the fuck is going on with his administration or in his head.

Putin's gotta be saying "Find out just what the FUCK America is doing? Are we at war? Are we at peace? Do I have the go-ahead to absorb the Ukraine? Is Biden sending me flowers? Find the fuck out!"

 

[FaramirG]

I don't feel bad for this administration at all. We can clearly see the incompetence and corruption in play at the expense of their countrymen. One year in and things have been objectively worse under Biden than Trump. Was it worth it? I really want to know.

The amazing part is how nobody is getting what they want from this guy. Biden is charting this incredible, almost unprecedented path in American presidential politics where he's pissing off absolutely everyone for 0 political gain.

 

[The Last Stand]

What. The fuck. Did I. Just. Watch?

The slow, but steady decline of the country you know and love.

 

[Honka Honka Burning Love]

If I was a foreign leader I would be abso-lutely fucking panicking.

Putin is Jerking off and Xi is having sex with his Demented Mother as we speak after getting 8 foot erections after the show Joe Biden put on today.

 

[Gehenna]

What. The fuck. Did I. Just. Watch?

If I was a foreign leader I would be abso-lutely fucking panicking.

You don't know what this senile motherfucker is going to say or do, you don't know if he even understands the words he's saying, you don't know what the fuck is going on with his administration or in his head.

Putin's gotta be saying "Find out just what the FUCK America is doing? Are we at war? Are we at peace? Do I have the go-ahead to absorb the Ukraine? Is Biden sending me flowers? Find the fuck out!"

I am -trying- to come up with a single coherent explanation for what I just watched.

Rarely in my career have I ever been left at a loss for words. My entire -office- is at a loss for words.

 

[ForgedBlades]

MSNBC is talking about how Texas is racist because they ran out of paper ballots.

 

[thx1138]

You know I'd like to think that they were all smug thinking "Ha, we've got him doped up/pointed in the right direction/the reporters are with us, this is going to go GREAT!"

...and there's this.

That, or as others have said they're setting him up for a 25th amendment.

 

[spiritofamermaid]

Damn now he's laughing and smiling?

Did this press conference happen suddenly? I don't remember anyone talking about it before now.

It had been known for at least a few days beforehand. It was just mentioned (hey Biden says he's going to do a conference to address poll numbers [aka people are noticing it has been a while since the last one] soon) somewhat briefly.

But don't worry, even when I knew one was happening soon I'd still get surprised by it.

 

[Oxous]

Now that that travesty of a press conference is over... POLLS! All of them came in today I believe.

Politico/Morning Consult, taken 1/15-1/16. Sample size of 2,005 registered voters. 40% Approve, 56% Disapprove.
Gallup, taken 1/3-1/16. Sample size of 811 adults. 40% Approve, 56% Disapprove.
YouGov America/The Economist, taken 1/15-1/18. Sample size of 1,500 adults. 39% Approve, 51% Disapprove.
YouGov America/The Economist, taken 1/15-1/18. Sample size of 1,163 registered voters. 42% Approve, 53% Disapprove.

Real Clear Politics has Biden's average at 40.9% approval, his worst ever rating there thus far.

 

[Gehenna]

MSNBC is talking about how Texas is racist because they ran out of paper ballots.

Every single Democrat outlet wants to -never cover this-. it hurts -everyone-. There is no cabal faction this helps, there is no handler this helps, there is no individual that I can think of who gains a benefit from this.

 

[The Last Stand]

I am -trying- to come up with a single coherent explanation for what I just watched.

Rarely in my career have I ever been left at a loss for words. My entire -office- is at a loss for words.

Is this politics? I really want to know.

 

[Diana Moon Glampers]

CNN, no seriously. It is who they are using as their political analysis firm.

This is also why Biden thinks the poles of American political opinion are MSNBC and Fox, even as he notes that they're on the way out. He has no idea what websites and social media sites now form the backbone of party propaganda and voter pushes.

This was one of the most bizarre things I've ever watched. And don't think progressives and indebted middle-classers will forget the fact that after nearly 2 hours and going over his stated time limit, the thing that sent him scurrying out of the room was the student loan forgiveness question about a promise he made before taking office, which he now won't even comment on.