Trashfire PPP: Pig's Passage to Portugal - Update 1/26 - Ralph got his ass kicked and murse stolen. Turns out, the citizens of Portugal are NOT big fans of the Killstream

What actually led to Ralph's beating?

  • Official narrative, chased robber to defend his property (Manpurse, €150) and 1 VS 4 epic fight.

    Votes: 80 3.4%

  • Beaten by the pimp of an underaged prostitute.

    Votes: 755 32.0%

  • Tumbled down the steep streets like a loose boulder.

    Votes: 153 6.5%

  • Beaten by a gang of drug dealers.

    Votes: 476 20.2%

  • Uttered something stupid in front of locals.

    Votes: 850 36.0%

  • Tried to put his trotters on Warski's sister.

    Votes: 47 2.0%
  • Total voters
    2,361
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Capt. Jean Luc Ritard said:
Ralph buys something that costs a large amount of money: "wow he got ripped off!"

Ralph buys something that does not cost very much money: "wow he's so broke!"
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I don't think Ralph is broke, I just think he is terrible with money. He wastes it on stupid shit, instead of saving it and spending it on things that will benefit him for years to come.
 
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Retink said:
Just out of curiosity, if it's a nice place why does the shrimp appetizer look so shit? It's rather pricey for something that looks like the person plating it couldn't be assed with the presentation in the slightest.
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Plating is not their strength, agreed, but the food is very good.

Love_Machine011 said:
Smh no spirit, its to give us the iconic "The Kiwi Critic" review of the Ralphamale vacation package.
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I'll do a review once he finishes the trip.
 
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TakeSoma said:
Plating is not their strength, agreed, but the food is very good.
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Maybe it's just what the Gunt ordered that made it look bad, but compare what's essentially 12$ from them to a 5$ Red Lobster (not a particularly great franchise) and it just seems weird.
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Capt. Jean Luc Ritard said:
Ralph buys something that costs a large amount of money: "wow he got ripped off!"

Ralph buys something that does not cost very much money: "wow he's so broke!"
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Yep. That's the nature of the farms. I got shit on once for agreeing with Russell Greer about something being funny.
To be fair though, Ralph does the exact same shit. He was trying to use Warski's little revenge porn thing against him in the same month he just got convicted for the same crime. He routinely is a hypocrite on things he condemns on his show.
 
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Retink said:
Maybe it's just what the Gunt ordered that made it look bad, but compare what's essentially 12$ from them to a 5$ Red Lobster (not a particularly great franchise) and it just seems weird.
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Again, I agree. Whoever plated that didn't do a good job. It looks clumsy and unprofessional. I've had that same appetizer in that restaurant and it was presented in a different way. Maybe they looked at Ralph and thought "lol, whatever"??? Still, unprofessional.
 
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Tommy's Mom said:
SPOILER ALERT: There's no way he's raising that kid. He will find a way out of it.

Just imagine the kind of damage a Female Guntling with daddy issues is going to do to this planet.
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Burn a bunch of coal and pay the toll in record time? No matter what happens, that kid is not long for this world.
 
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Ralph, since you're probably monitoring this thread and seem to be having a hard time eating anything other than shrimp, please check a restaurant called TheGreatAmericanDisaster, it's not far from where you're staying and you'll feel right at home. There are also a lot of sixteen old e-thots usually hanging around.

But if you really wanna flash your money, go to Belcanto and have codfish with a bottle of Barca Velha. Finish it of with a Taylor 1863 Single Harvest Port, and now we're talking.
 
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ralphyjimby-real said:
Some of you kiwi bros are alright.

But the kiwis translating english to (((BRAZILIAN))) portuguese make me lose faith in my kiwi bros. :(
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Nevermind, it is what it is. No one barely knows that Portuguese is even a language if it wasn't for the Brazilians. Still, I bet the average Kiwi tries harder than Ralph. Ralph probably tries to speak Spanish thinking it's the same thing.
 
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Tommy's Mom said:
SPOILER ALERT: There's no way he's raising that kid. He will find a way out of it.

Just imagine the kind of damage a Female Guntling with daddy issues is going to do to this planet.
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In a sick irony, the child will be lucky if she gets most of her genes from Meigh. At least with a nose job and 45 minutes of make up each morning she could lead a fairly normal life as like a receptionist or something. The daddy issues could simply manifest into having like five cats. There's a low percentile chance that Guntling 2.0 could be ... "normal".
 
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LaurenLauren said:
Dude, pls go tell your familly how much efort you are putting into guntanalysis. I'm sure they will be so proud of you.
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It took less than 10 minutes and it was during work, when I am the most active on the board. You're telling someone who made a long sperg post analysing Ralph's height with geometry to stop being autistic with Photoshop?
"Familly"? Konichiwa a-log-san.

Retink said:
Maybe it's just what the Gunt ordered that made it look bad, but compare what's essentially 12$ from them to a 5$ Red Lobster (not a particularly great franchise) and it just seems weird.
View attachment 2916829View attachment 2916830
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It honestly looks gross regardless of cost. Hope the mayonnaise was at least made in-house. It looks like someone blew their load and threw prawns on. That's a $3 cup of crap he paid over $10 for.

I won't fault him for having expensive yet nicely presented and obviously good tasting food. His previous steak was just fine. This prawn cocktail looks gross. The rice looks good until you envision a 5'1" 400lbs blob gobbling it down like Amanda behind the subway she works at during a lunch break.
 
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