Trashfire PPP: Pig's Passage to Portugal - Update 1/26 - Ralph got his ass kicked and murse stolen. Turns out, the citizens of Portugal are NOT big fans of the Killstream

[Sir Joahim Browinson III]

Ralph is ready to waste as much money as possible to get away from Meigh as far as possible and hang arround with luxury places.

Gunt really tries to pretend he lives luxury big shot lifestyle while still remaining the deffinition of failing white trash with two kids and a fiance hanging on him.

 

[mindlessobserver]

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this nigga paid $62 for shrimp and mayonnaise

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The Pincho de gambas com arroz was the second cheapest item in the the Peixes section of the menu (19,50 €) and the Toucinho do céu is 7,50 €. Truly Ralph is eating the meal of kings.

Total of €82 ($92.86) for some good ol' scrimpf and mayo (4 ct.) with a side of rice and a light dessert.

This pretty much confirms Ralph is reading this thread and is mad about us making fun of his trip to Burger King.

Ralph you moron, shrimp are not native to Portugal! They got that shit from China or South Africa and you pay premium for the delivery service. Order the squid or the octopus, or any one of the Atlantic fish. Like the Cod! You know what Cod is, right? The Portuguese almost made it to America chasing Cod. Not ordering it is like visiting Mexico and not getting a street taco, or going to France and not trying cheese. What's the point?

 

[MoeChotto]

This pretty much confirms Ralph is reading this thread and is mad about us making fun of his trip to Burger King.

Ralph you moron, shrimp are not native to Portugal! They got that shit from China or South Africa and you pay premium for the delivery service. Order the squid or the octopus, or any one of the Atlantic fish. Like the Cod! You know what Cod is, right? The Portuguese almost made it to America chasing Cod. Not ordering it is like visiting Mexico and not getting a street taco, or going to France and not trying cheese. What's the point?

I mean he's been reading the thread since before he left for Portugal and probably every waking minute on the plane ride over.

Someone here mentioned "I hope he's not so dumb he doesn't know he needs a SIM card to use his phone" and then one the first thing he tweeted after he landed was "Hmm should I get a SIM card or use the T-Mobile international pass?" I guess to own the aylawwwgs who don't think he's smart enough to get a SIM card. In any other circumstance that detail would be way too banal to tweet about, even for Ralph.

Hi Ralph

 

[MeltyTW]

I mean he's been reading the thread since before he left for Portugal and probably every waking minute on the plane ride over.

Someone here mentioned "I hope he's not so dumb he doesn't know he needs a SIM card to use his phone" and then one the first thing he tweeted after he landed was "Hmm should I get a SIM card or use the T-Mobile international pass?" I guess to own the aylawwwgs who don't think he's smart enough to get a SIM card. In any other circumstance that detail would be way too banal to tweet about, even for Ralph.

Hi Ralph

It'd been proven multiple times that ralph reads this site from the flashing lights to being caught on cam at bakeds temp house browsing to warski and ade talking about times he's read to ralph responding to chat live or later and name dropping to ralph ordering gaytor to garrison chat and constantly read it manually

He reads it far more obsessively than any woman or psychopath ever though he's really fucked in the head

 

[Ralph Barnhardt]

So far Ethan has spent his week long trip eating Whoppers, eating shrimp and mayo, eating rice, and meeting a fan who went on someone else's show with him. How can one man produce so much KAWNTINT? Get rekt kiwifags here at the Karen farms.

 

[YumeNoHero]

"Waiter! I said waiter! This fish you served me is raw, how dare you offend the Ralphamale clan in such a grave way! Had my horse been here she would have been outraged with how much she loves you anime eyed people, but unfortunately, or fortunately seeing with how poor your cooking of the fish is, she could not come being a woman and all she must stay locked inside the house, tending to my there spawn. Japan has made a mighty powerful enemy this day with me and I shall see it sunk to the pits of the ocean."

What if he goes to an automated restaurant instead of the usual restaurant? I can't really imagine his fat gunt stuffing 50+ sushi dishes inside an automated sushi shop.

I hope he does, the japanese would relentlessly bully him until he decides to become a "human accident" at the Shin-Koiwa Station, inconveniencing many a salaryman as his final act of spite.

Just remember, if you catch a glimpse of him, get clear of the splash zone.

Unfortunately, most Japanese usually keep it to themselves but if he caused enough trouble, talks behind his back is guaranteed, especially in online circles. People will warn others to not directly confront him and steer clear when seen. Though I do hope that with enough look of disgust from everyone around him, he will eventually kiss the front of a shinkansen.

 

[WhimsicalTrolli]

Good job, Santiago. Now he's got blackmail on you. You are now Ethan Ralph's Portuguese slave.

He was probably doxxed during the secure server leaks. What else does he have to lose?

 

[Sir Joahim Browinson III]

It's not even good season to go to Portugal, When you to places in South europe you at least want do it while summer, when it's a good weather and hot season is going.
Ralph of course never cared about anything like that, because the only thing he cares about is bragging about how much cash he can waste and expanding the Gunt.

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

It's not even good season to go to Portugal, When you to places in South europe you at least want do it while summer, when it's a good weather and hot season is going.
Ralph of course never cared about anything like that, because the only thing he cares about is bragging about how much cash he can waste and expanding the Gunt.

Oh, the best part of his whole adventure is he traveled “unvaxxed” for ten hours to go to Lisbon in fucking January. It could only be better if he went for a dip in the ocean or gets Covid.

Also, can we get a poll going on if Gunt will get quarantined in Portugal for two weeks? He says he doesn’t have a vax card so he will have to take a PCR test before he will be allowed to board a plane home. He might get his wish and get a three week vacation from Meigh.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

I’d be more impressed if he’d just lit a few thousand dollars on fire instead of spending it to go to a frigid port city during the off-season. But Ralph isn’t it he baller he wants everyone to think he is.

 

[RU486]

I hope this fatso never come to Japan.

Oh he will, Pantsu will want to do some degenerate weeb shit that can only be done there.

 

[oramge cat]

What pisses me off is if he waited like 4 months and had a vaccine passport his vacation could have been really good, lockdowns would most likely end and the hot weather would bring people out to party. Instead he chose to go during lockdowns without a vaccine pass during the off-season so he is further restricted in an already restricted place by himself.

Even if he just waited, he could totally find places that are too busy to check.
Imagine the poor portuguese bouncer that had this fat cunt waddle up to him and had to turn him down.
"passporte de vacina?"
"YEAH I HAVE MY PASSPORT I'M ON VACATION"
"no sir, you have vaccine card?"
"I AINT INJECTING MYSELF WITH NONE OF THAT SCIENCE BULLSHIT I'M A TRUE *wheezes, catches his breath* A TRUE RALPHA MALE AND MY..."
"OK sir the law says you must have vaccine card, you have to leave"
*angry gunt noises*

 

[There Is Light At The End]

Going to foreign country to own someone only to be ridiculed by everyone except his fans (word used very loosely) what a story

 

[Tommy's Mom]

Can someone add a poll to this thread?

How many of you think he's going to spend the whole trip in his hotel room? He done literally nothing so far, except go out for a meal.

 

[ThatsMyDog]

By any chance did Ralph bring his louis vuitton man purse for the trip?

 

[Zaryiu2]

Ralph, imagine all the starving children out there. Like..... your own. I'm sure Xander could have used some of the money you've wasted on this trip. I'm sure Cavalinha will need some essentials when she finally makes her way out the horse vag. Most likely it will be a real set of parents. What I'm saying Ethan is give the kid up for adoption. No reason both your lives should be ruined.

I can not wait for the child protection services intervention arc, no kid deserve the gunt and/or horseface

 

[donjulio]

Oh he will, Pantsu will want to do some degenerate weeb shit that can only be done there.

He’s not gonna get very far. Eventually some old Japanese man is gonna think he’s a mutated land whale demon sent to avenge his kin and promptly spear him in the gunt with a hastily sharpened broom stick. The last thing he’s gonna hear is “ fuck a you wharrel!”

 

[SaidNoOneEver]

He’s not gonna get very far. Eventually some old Japanese man is gonna think he’s a mutated land whale demon sent to avenge his kin and promptly spear him in the gunt with a hastily sharpened broom stick. The last thing he’s gonna hear is “ fuck a you wharrel!”

"YOU WOULDN'T BELIEVE IT GAYTOR! SUDDENLY THIS GREENPEACE BOAT CAME OUT OF NOWHERE AND SAVED ME FROM THE JAP WHALERS! THE FUCKIN COMMIES SAVED ME GAYTOR! FUCKIN COMMIES!"

 

[Realistic Elephant]

I like what people were doing and boiling down his meals to the component to make it even sillier that he did all this
"FLEW TO COUNTRY TO SPITE SOMEONE ONLY TO EAT MAYO AND RICE!!!"

"FLEW TO COUNTRY TO SPITE SOMEONE ONLY TO EAT BURGER KING AND SHRIMP!!!"

 

[3-2-1836]

I mean he's been reading the thread since before he left for Portugal and probably every waking minute on the plane ride over.

Someone here mentioned "I hope he's not so dumb he doesn't know he needs a SIM card to use his phone" and then one the first thing he tweeted after he landed was "Hmm should I get a SIM card or use the T-Mobile international pass?" I guess to own the aylawwwgs who don't think he's smart enough to get a SIM card. In any other circumstance that detail would be way too banal to tweet about, even for Ralph.

Hi Ralph

That was me, I mentioned it became traveling through West Texas there's a section of I-10 close enough to the Rio Grande in the desert where your phone will randomly jump to the Mexican cell towers and effectively brick it until you get 20 miles from the border back in the days before you had the option to manually change networks again.