Back home in Florida, I enrolled in arts magnet programs for both middle and high school where most of my friends were queer. I lived in a rainbow bubble full of performers and creators who understood all of my Nicki Minaj and Jennifer Coolidge references. Everyone watched “Glee,” and all of my friends could easily list the Jonas Brothers in order of hotness.
College has been a vastly different experience. I have somehow found myself with more straight, cisgender friends than LGBTQIA ones — despite living in Los Angeles, one of the most progressive and creative cities in the world. There is only one thing that can turn my new cardinal and gold bubble rainbow: yassification.
NBC News defines yassifying as “beautifying something, typically something that is unappealing or heteronormative.” Urban Dictionary user “certified twink” more eloquently states that yassification is the “act of making someone or something gayer or more girlboss.” Regardless of which definition you find more appropriate, one thing is for sure — to yassify something is to improve it.
According to a recent Gallup poll, a “record 7.1% of U.S. adults self-identify as lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender or something other than heterosexual.” This statistic may seem small, but it is a stark increase from the 5.6% found in the same survey the prior year. Plus, the 7.1% only accounts for those who admitted to being LGBTQIA in the survey — and, speaking from experience, discovering and labeling your identity can be a long and confusing process.
Simply put, the world is changing, and I fear that those who remain un-yassified may be left behind. It’ll be like the Rapture but set to the soundtrack of Charli XCX’s “Vroom Vroom” EP. Luckily, I have compiled some tips for how to yassify your friends — and save them from doom — based on my own experiences at USC thus far.
1. Take your straight friends to a midnight screening of “The Rocky Horror Picture Show” (1975).
One of my favorite theaters in Los Angeles, The Nuart, hosts a screening of the iconic movie-musical with a shadow cast every other week. “Rocky Horror” is an interactive, raunchy film and live theater experience. It’s nearly impossible to leave a screening without having been fully yassified.
2. Bring your hetero homies out for a night on the town in WeHo.
West Hollywood, known by the gays lovingly as “WeHo,” is home to countless LGBTQIA establishments, including shops, restaurants and nightclubs. I do not condone underage drinking, but for those of age, I have heard through the grapevine that The Bayou serves jello shots in syringes that are sure to yassify your friends’ bloodstreams.
3. Offer unsolicited fashion advice.
It’s okay to critique your friend’s khaki shorts and Vineyard Vines T-shirt! They are in their early 20s — they should know better. In all seriousness, L.A. can be a difficult place to keep up with the ever-changing fashion trends. Take your friends shopping for some cheap rings and bling at the Melrose Trading Post or teach them how to french tuck. With style comes yassification.
4. Over time, recommend your friends new songs that become increasingly chaotic and queer.
Start out with something gentle that can appeal to everyone, like Phoebe Bridgers or Lorde. After easing them in, go full throttle by recommending the likes of late hyperkinetic pop legend SOPHIE or Artpop era Lady Gaga. Next thing you know, they’ll be clubbing with you at TigerHeat!
Yassification, albeit appearing light-hearted and mindless at its surface, is a powerful tool the LGBTQIA community can use to normalize queerness. The trend brings queer trends to the table in a digestible way — straight, cisgender people will likely react more openmindedly to jokingly being told they are being “yassified” than they would to adopting queer cultural attributes.
USC, like most historic institutions, has a predominantly straight, cisgender and white population. It can be difficult to drift away from heteronormative ideals without a tool like yassification. Hopefully, the above simple tips will help you effectively yassify your friends and loved ones. So far, they have helped me curate a much gayer and more girlboss social circle — and I have felt all the more fulfilled.
