A Kiwi Farms game of FATAL: Abandon all hope, ye who enter here

Ass-Smasher just idly inspects everything, still kind of confused about what just happened. It was all so sudden.

"So, just to make sure, I'm not having some insane dream, am I?"
"Heh heh, well if you, like, are, I'm having it too, and it's pretty fucking cool. Look, I got a free barrel of mead. I basically scored."
Beavis wanders out of the burning inn, oblivious to his burnt hair. He offers everyone a drink of mead.
 
"Heh heh, well if you, like, are, I'm having it too, and it's pretty fucking cool. Look, I got a free barrel of mead. I basically scored."
Beavis wanders out of the burning inn, oblivious to his burnt hair. He offers everyone a drink of mead.
Obsert the Human takes a pint and chugs it on his way to the bath.

"Aye, thanksh for the drink. Much appreciated, bugbear..."

YES I SPELLED THAT CORRECTLY

EDIT: ALSO YES I'M STILL GOING TO THE BATHHOUSE
 
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"Heh heh, well if you, like, are, I'm having it too, and it's pretty fucking cool. Look, I got a free barrel of mead. I basically scored."
Beavis wanders out of the burning inn, oblivious to his burnt hair. He offers everyone a drink of mead.
Sybil gladly partakes in her first mead.
 
"Heh heh, well if you, like, are, I'm having it too, and it's pretty fucking cool. Look, I got a free barrel of mead. I basically scored."
Beavis wanders out of the burning inn, oblivious to his burnt hair. He offers everyone a drink of mead.

"Wonderful. Was gonna get one meself but the place was on fire." He fills his tankard with mead, chugging it down in a single gulp. "Your name's Beavis, right?"
 
Amsia chimps out in kobold moonspeak because she literally shares no common language with anybody else in the party.
[[Is there even a "common" style tongue in Fatal? I couldn't find it..hence why Glaukon isn't speaking.]]
 
Well, given Glaukon speaks...Troll? And that's about it..he's just going along with what he can pick up from people's gestures and actions. His jokes about corpses and well-done steak probably fly over everyone's head unless they also speak troll.
>He looks over at the chimping kobold and turns back to his manhandling of the broken corpses of the lolcows given she might be either praying or singing for all he knows.
 
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[Gregek Kuruhuluret disregards the fallen chambermaid and strolls up to Beavis since he's the only other person here who can speak the same language as him]

I wish there weren't so many people standing about gawking at this fire so I could start taking some slaves. Anyway I'll have a bit of that mead, I suppose. Also what the fuck is up with that Kobold screeching at everyone?

[Gregek Kuruhuluret also looks through ADFs corpse for any usable items, hoping some of ADFs fat fuck armor will fit him]
 
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Well, given Glaukon speaks...Troll? And that's about it..he's just going along with what he can pick up from people's gestures and actions. His jokes about corpses and well-done steak probably fly over everyone's head unless they also speak troll.
>He looks over at the chimping kobold and turns back to his manhandling of the broken corpse of the lolcows given she might be either praying or singing for all he knows.
Sybil gives Glaukon a thumbs up as a gesture of thanks for manhandling the corpses. She decides he seems useful for a troll. She then glaces at the Kobold chimping out and attempts to spit at her. "Fucking Kobold scum."
 
I whip Sybil, default fulcrum point of 5.

Roll(3d10)+0:
10,5,4,+0
Total:19

19 + 5 (weapon skill whip) = 24

(edit ; I was wrong about fulcrum's affecting chance to hit, they only affect your queue in the initiative roll which we're not doing anyway, thank god.)

(edit ; best I can figure Sybil's CA is 10 (base human) + 0 (no armor) + 0 (no agility bonus)

But... if I hit her in the foot she gets +5 subdual CAS for her shoes... jesus fuck this is a mess of a game.

Okay unless I'm wrong 10 was the roll to beat unless I hit her in the feet when it's 15 so no matter what I hit her.)
 
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I whip Sybil, default fulcrum point of 5.

Roll(3d10)+0:
10,5,4,+0
Total:19

19 + 5 (weapon skill whip) = 24

(edit ; I was wrong about fulcrum's affecting chance to hit, they only affect your queue in the initiative roll which we're not doing anyway, thank god.)
Hold up a minute I'm trying to figure out spitting. So I roll 3d10 get 23. Ok that's substantial saliva at 6 feet not quite a lugee but I'll take it.
But wait I need to use enunciation as a modifier and I have -34. It would seem I am physically incapable of spitting.
 
Hold up a minute I'm trying to figure out spitting. So I roll 3d10 get 23. Ok that's substantial saliva at 6 feet not quite a lugee but I'll take it.
But wait I need to use enunciation as a modifier and I have -34. It would seem I am physically incapable of spitting.

lol ya, made sure to properly solve the quadratic equation to get the spit trajectory arc.

I'm going to whip you regardless of whether it hits or not btw.
 
On a side note I just found out my character is retarded and she may or may not have exceptional individual strength.
Put all your skillpoints in Autism, eh?
EDIT: Ok so apparently subterannean trolls have a huge range (0-80 int) for being Exceptional Individuals, and therefore Glaukon is retarded, and may also have tardroid strength
 
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