Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[Whatthefuck]

He looks dead inside. Literally there is zero life in those eyes.

Did the Wendigo step out for a moment or is he having another stroke?


Is Jr actually Jim Traynor's son? Hmmmmmm.....


Yeah but you have to remember we're seeing the result of being bound to her loser of a husband for however long they've been married. She can't hide her contempt for him any more. I like to think that she was maybe not a prize when they got together but she was the best that Mushbrain could have asked for and he was just so pathetic and needy that she felt he'd never leave her and it was either marry him or spend the rest of her life alone.

I still think she might not have made the best choice.


You sure about that?

Gluttony - Just look at him and the amount of food he shovels down his maw.
Pride - He's very proud of his youtube "success" and markets himself as some social media influencer.
Wrath - Taking down PC&TLM streams plus getting angy at his puppy for biting.
Sloth - The most exercise he gets is walking to the fridge and back to his easy chair.
Lust - Guy is totally eyefucking the Meat Marine, Keto baker and every other man he sees.
Greed - All the smokers he can possibly fit on his back porch.
Envy - He's envious of everybody else's success.

Yeah he totally doesn't sin.

I think we can safely add trying to choke out his own son under the Wrath category. He's pretty much run the gamut, but luckily, at Murder Church, LLC he's free to never mind this peace and love cuckery and stick with the Old Testament. Protestants don't go with the Devil's church, the Roman Catholic Church. They stick with the fundies and go straight to the Big 10. Even so, he's committed many of those sins as well, see: coveting.

 

[ZipDisk]

The turkeys eating Jack would be too poetic.

I'll give you him decomposing on the wrong side of the weather door while they jable.

 

[Fatty2988]

 

[ZipDisk]

Is the king of nice losing patience?

 

[Altera]

View attachment 3239630

I am absolutely positive the reason is because he is too zonked out to remember which is which and the fat fuck isn't going to stand up to write labels so he needs to be able to see it to compare.

 

[captkrisma]

I am absolutely positive the reason is because he is too zonked out to remember which is which and the fat fuck isn't going to stand up to write labels so he needs to be able to see it to compare.

The labels keep burning up in the oven

 

[Bumwine]

Surprised he didn’t say “LoOK gUiyZ tHe jEhOVah’S wiTnESs tUrKEyS aRE bAck.”

ETA:
Here’s the video, @ZipDisk.
View attachment 3238967
“The Jehovah’s Witness turkeys…Look, I’m a Christian…”

This really is Jack at some of his dumbest- trying to make a funny, but coming off as detestable. Towards the end, he waddles up to the door, making dog (pig?) noises to scare them away, before admitting that he’s afraid to go outside because of a possible turkey attack.

"Open up Jack. You know you can't escape retribution for all have you done to our brethren, make things easy"

Turkeys are nasty fuckers when in bad mood, have Jack opened the door those two birds would have kicked his shit easily
Also him trying to be funny is pure cringe

 

[Tiresome]

View attachment 3239630

Flying just a little too close to the sun there Rob...

 

[stets]

View attachment 3226197

Uh oh! Angy Jack has encountered a most heinous plot to thwart his right to the democratic process! Could it be those devilish democrats, as suggested by James Scheirer, or is Jack just an idiot?

Given that this is what you get from the Sumner County Election Commission when you Google "Sumner County TN Sample Ballot," I'm going with the latter.

View attachment 3226201

Spoiler: Large Image

View attachment 3226201

It’s a primary, Jack, you fucking moron. Everyone on the ballot is a republican. Unless your brain is so broken that you asked for a democrat ballot.

Off the wall theory, but is it possible Hammy is embezzling funds from her employer? If she’s really a financial controller, then she would have the know-how to cover her tracks and take advantage of an employer that isn’t paying attention to the books.

She’s working for a tiny, shithole company that manufactures the rocking chairs that are sold in front of Cracker Barrel. They don’t pull in enough revenue where you could siphon anything off without it being noticed.

 

[FatJacksFatAssTongue]

She’s working for a tiny, shithole company

Solid work weeks for Tranny + plus HER parents’ ca$h + added government disability ca$h for Jagoff.

This loser is livin’ the good life, sucking up Tranny’s handed-over resources and stupidly bleeding ca$h waaaay faster than his government chee$e is coming in.

But … at least he’ll always be the nicest guy on YouTube

 

[AnOminous]

Plus + plus Tranny’s parents’ ca$h + government disability ca$h for Jagoff. Livin’ the good life.

Jack doesn't have the job history that would qualify him for SSD. It would have to be needs-based and nobody could live in the house he lives in with Tammy and actually need SSI. I think he also fucked up his opportunity to get coof bux just out of sheer laziness, even though it should have been a grift easy enough for even Jackhole.

 

[She Brings The Rain]

Surprised he didn’t say “LoOK gUiyZ tHe jEhOVah’S wiTnESs tUrKEyS aRE bAck.”

ETA:
Here’s the video, @ZipDisk.
View attachment 3238967
“The Jehovah’s Witness turkeys…Look, I’m a Christian…”

This really is Jack at some of his dumbest- trying to make a funny, but coming off as detestable. Towards the end, he waddles up to the door, making dog (pig?) noises to scare them away, before admitting that he’s afraid to go outside because of a possible turkey attack.

Something about him sounding so earnest while repeatedly saying "what do they want?" is really setting of my schizo alarms. Like he truly thinks these damn birds are coming for him specifically. His brain must be like slurry.

 

[RainwaterDrop]

Is the king of nice losing patience?

Not really, still far away from being aggressive, just a little confrontational. Jack is too much of a fucking idiot to realize he is even being mocked, so it's still safe lol!

A nice question would be whether Jack bought the seasonings because they have a Q in the logo. Brand started way back in 2009 according to their website, so it's not a politically motivated thing, but Jagoff is the kind of retard to believe it is, so who the fuck knows lol!

Solid work weeks for Tranny + plus HER parents’ ca$h + added government disability ca$h for Jagoff.

This loser is livin’ the good life, sucking up Tranny’s handed-over resources and stupidly bleeding ca$h waaaay faster than his government chee$e is coming in.

But … at least he’ll always be the nicest guy on YouTube

As others pointed out, he probably isn't on Government benefits, but he is still being financed by others. If this guy had the most basic sense of self-awareness he would at least be grateful enough to try and not act like a complete asshole to others, specially the ones that finance his retarded shit, but he is too much of a narcissist to take these steps. Fuck, his strokes might be the one thing helping him subsist, I doubt most people would put up with his shit if he was able to work and provide for himself!

Flying just a little too close to the sun there Rob...

Jack won't notice unless you make a point of making a clown out of him. Rob is usually subtle so he can get some leeway if the Jagoff finally uses his brain for once and realizes he is being mocked. Still safe!

 

[rubytintedchix]

Monday has come and gone and no new JOTG video. So much for the new title card edit on the new MACKbook.

 

[Whatthefuck]

Fuck, his strokes might be the one thing helping him subsist, I doubt most people would put up with his shit if he was able to work and provide for himself!

Yet, he'd be the first to look at someone in his position and rail about how they should be helping themselves. Bootstraps and all, you know. I don't know if it's exceptionalism or ego, but he does not see himself as "disabled" or needing any care when we ALL know he most likely has trouble wiping his ass after he destroys the toilet after a JOTG foray. If he was alone, sans Tammy and Murder Church, he'd be well and truly fucked. If he is getting SSI (and please yeet me into the sun if I'm inadvertently paying for him to exist) then he'd have to depend on Tam Tam to fill out the fucking paperwork. He literally can do nothing on his own.

 

[Gothic King Cumstain]

Hat look guud

View attachment 3234600

Man, it may just be me, but he looks rough in this pic. Might be nearing the Last Raw Supper fellow foodjacks.

 

[Pig Cups]

Thought:

With Jack’s constant referencing of Hope in CWJ/JOTG, FaceBook, and especially including an image of her in his pathetic excuse for merch, I wonder to what degree (if any) Jack excitedly sprang for getting a dog because he thought it would add a “new character” to the “show,” and maybe draw in some interest/mix things up a bit.

 

[Dave Meltzer]

Thought:

With Jack’s constant referencing of Hope in CWJ/JOTG, FaceBook, and especially including an image of her in his pathetic excuse for merch, I wonder to what degree (if any) Jack excitedly sprang for getting a dog because he thought it would add a “new character” to the “show,” and maybe draw in some interest/mix things up a bit.

It's a shame he didn't try his own version of the animal vlogs like Cole and Marmalade. Jack thinking up, filming, and editing adventures for Hope would be so good. Although it would likely just turn into Playing with Your Dog Food and Dog Food Wars. Maybe not.

 

[Hungry Homeless Handjob]

Jack thinking up, filming, and editing adventures for Hope would be so good.

This wouldn't work because he can't do any of those three things.

 

[Aunt Myrna]

Thought:

With Jack’s constant referencing of Hope in CWJ/JOTG, FaceBook, and especially including an image of her in his pathetic excuse for merch, I wonder to what degree (if any) Jack excitedly sprang for getting a dog because he thought it would add a “new character” to the “show,” and maybe draw in some interest/mix things up a bit.

100%. It's why he includes her barking all the time. He thinks it's cute and relatable to have a pet that interrupts you. So he forces it into every video. It's a shtick and one that is only funny about the first time or two.