Incels are groomed to share the misery, true.
But part of the problem is that normies, wanting to virtue signal about their "empathy" (not really, empathetic people don't usually like to talk about it or think they're not doing enough) provide stuff like this tidbit: "Ugly dudes fuck, ugly dudes get married, ugly dudes live normal lives." without any qualifier.
Instead of directing people to therapy or just listening to their sorrow (you're not required to but then don't pretend you care enough) or actually trying to help with advice tailored to a specific person, you just push those still undecided into the arms of terminally online "true" incels.
If you don't want to help those guys - don't fucking run your mouth with your truism. It's best if you just ignore them than give a meaningless platitude that not only that dude isn't ready to receive - he will perceive it as a mockery, which it is kinda, even if you didn't intend it as such.