Disclaimer: I am a male, so I do not mean to intrude, but I have a question for you guys. I had a "lipstick lesbian" friend of mine go nuts and trooned out, the whole nine yards.
Anyway, I know that troons are frequently barging in to lesbian circles, but because of the high rate at which lesbians are trooning out, is it also becoming increasingly more difficult for lesbians to form stable relationships? Do you have to constantly worry that your partner is going to jump on the troon train and start taking HRT? What are lesbians doing in response to try and screen partners who might do this in the future?
Looking at what happened to my friend from college, I imagine it must be even more devastating for people you are romantically involved with.
I'm still trying to get better myself, but I don't mind getting rather emotionally intimate with FTMs/NBs, I'm pretty sociable and I've opened up to them about my experiences that lead me to develop GD and my subsequent healing as a woman, and they've related a lot to what I've said, sayng that their transition was because of [le gay woman in conservative catholic culture that somehow manages to hate trannies less] as well. This is going to sound a little trite, but I feel like we could all do some healing together as people and end up as proud, stable women that would make our forebears proud. That said.. it's hard to date people like that, when someone is that much of a neurotic mess it can be hard to watch, and harder to help. I don't date for obvious reasons of trying to stop being a basket case, but unfortunately, even if I were dating, not many options are to be had, most women my age with my interests seem to have some kind of unhealed trauma from misogyny that leads them to identify as nonbinary.
I have first-hand experience with this: Emotional, physical, and psychological abuse at the hands of family and friends for the crime of being not only a woman and a gay human, but a
gay woman, is the single best indicator of whether someone will transition. Not all traumatised lesbians/bi girls transition, but if they've had it shoved down their throats that they have to perform extreme femininity and heterosexuality in order to stay safe, they'll seek an out pretty quick. Of course, I don't mean to diminish the real struggles that men have with a lack of empathy towards their emotions and humanity by society, restrictive ideas of masculinity, feeling stuck in the role of being the breadwinner when one might rather be a home maker and the primary rock for the children, the expectation for men to stifle their emotions when this only causes psychological hurt for them and their loved ones, and other things, I have good male friends who open my eyes and I've come to see that life can be just as brutal and crushing for the other side. I am only trying to explain the thought process of a loony troon.
It's kind of like you're asking "would I worry about my hypothetical partner self-harming?", when you ask if I worry if they'd go on HRT. Mentally ill women with unresolved childhood issues go on HRT, if your partner isn't super fucked in the head, she won't. Like another said, you can usually sniff out mental illness pretty easily.
If you love and support her and tell her that she doesn't have to shave, have long hair, wear a bra, wear a soul-crushing costume, in order to be safe and a woman, she won't transition. Unless it's for a fetish, transitioning is a coping mechanism that is a very extreme form of dissociation. I was more accepted as a tranny than as a gay woman, which makes me sad. I wish more women weren't being forced to transition due to childhood abuse, homophobia, and restrictive gender roles, and this transsexuality business just enforces more old-fashioned gender stereotypes. Gender dysphoria is a real mental illness, arguably some subsect of BDD (a "child" illness itself of OCD, which comes from anxiety and trauma) but the treatment isn't eccentric body mods, it's self-love and gentleness.
I really hope your friend gets better, it's a terrible thing to be so traumatised, self-hating, and disconnected from one's own body that one can't even recognise their sex as their own.
My girlfriend and I at one point were some sort of agender/demigirl or whatever dumb shit. We grew out of it eventually. The three female/female couples our age that I know of - two of them have a "partner" or "boifriend" instead of a normal gf. The third one only started seeing each other so idk much yet. Possibly normies.
>two gay women
>boyfriend
This isn't homophobic 1950s NYC anymore, butches don't need to pretend to be men to avoid getting raped and beaten. ffs, all this gender shit is killing the butch populations like crack and black neighbourhoods.
Apologies for the blogpost, I ramble when I care about the subject
