Times you accidentally went shitposter in real life - When that smart mouth of yours outruns the part of your brain telling you to shut up

[Russian Bot]

I'm sure there must be a few of you with stories about this. Where you thought up something you thought was funny so you said it before you realised that you aren't online. I'll start.

Was at the pub with a friend and his friend who I'd not met before. This friend kept banging on about mental disabilities (honestly, it was mainly those bollocks ones that are for attention, not the serious ones) and that whole crowd, and he said "I noticed there's an awful lot of gay disabled people."

So I replied "Well, it is a very common disability".

Managed to play it off as Jimmy Carr style edgelord humour, but had to watch myself to not say anything else like that...

 

[Blasterisk]

I've called something "exceptional" more than once.

 

[cornycat]

In middle school I used to quote filthy frank.

 

[Russian Bot]

In middle school I used to quote filthy frank.

I imagine that was fine though. Could probably get away with some FF quotes around normies if they've seen any of his stuff.

I'm talking about more contemporary situations where you are trying to hide your political opninions but you think of something funny so you have to say it before you realise it's a bad move.

 

[Iron Jaguar]

I know a guy whose first wife died of cancer. When his latest girlfriend was also diagnosed with cancer, I said, "Fuck, you must be hard to live with."

Or the girlfriend who asked me what I would change about about our relationship, and I replied, "I'd get you to go to the gym a couple of times a week."

 

[Just A Butt]

i called my dad a nigger

 

[Usb2200a]

I told a room full of opera singers that they were living proof that society had jobs for the morbidly obese.

 

[cornycat]

I imagine that was fine though. Could probably get away with some FF quotes around normies if they've seen any of his stuff.

I'm talking about more contemporary situations where you are trying to hide your political opninions but you think of something funny so you have to say it before you realise it's a bad move.

No, I literally would screech it. Imagine a chubby 11-13 year old kid with thick framed glasses who also spouted 4chan shit. I accidentally still blurt out "cope" or "based" sometimes with my older sister.

 

[Iron Jaguar]

i called my dad a nigger

Which is funny because if he actually was one, you wouldn't know who he was.

 

[SpergPatrol]

I have made jokes without a filter more than once that have gotten me into trouble before.

Example of this was I had a friend back years ago around 2018 who mentioned thier parents drank when they were pregnant with them.
Before they could even finish thier sentence I then said "that explains a lot."

He then began to scream at me for that and then I slipped up more and went "kind of proving my point here."

I wasn't even trying to sass the guy.
It just happened out of instinct from years of trolling users online.

The internet was a mistake.

 

[Russian Bot]

I know a guy whose first wife died of cancer. When his latest girlfriend was also diagnosed with cancer, I said, "Fuck, you must be hard to live with."

Or the girlfriend who asked me what I would change about about our relationship, and I replied, "I'd get you to go to the gym a couple of times a week."

S Tier bants m8.

 

[Chocolate Wombat]

I called my mom a nigger.

 

[Honka Honka Burning Love]

I was shopping in my non-work clothing a couple of months ago and some fat ass poked me on the shoulder because I wasn't responding to her cause I had my very nice Noise Canceling ear buds in and was very much ignoring her because I WAS OFF THE CLOCK IN MY WORK CLOTHING and asked me to check to see if we had something in stock I told her

"I am off the Clock, get your fat Gunt away from me."

and then walked away as she seethed.

 

[Poppavalyim Andropoff]

my brain has the good sense not to even bother telling me to shut up

 

[ToroidalBoat]

Once I called a "face mask" a "muzzle" by accident in a public setting IRL.

No visible reaction though.

 

[Russian Bot]

my brain has the good sense not to even bother telling me to shut up

May as well embrace it eh.

Another one this week, fat bloke walks into the pub at about 11 o clock pointing at his T shirt that had some band on and says "Guess where I've just been!"

I looked at his belly and said "McDonalds?"

 

[Poppavalyim Andropoff]

May as well embrace it eh.

Another one this week, fat bloke walks into the pub at about 11 o clock pointing at his T shirt that had some band on and says "Guess where I've just been!"

I looked at his belly and said "McDonalds?"

yeah ya mum was working the fry basket
yeah ya mum was in drive through offering gobbies for nuggets
yeah ya mum was hungry after last night
yeah ya mum was ...

I call that banter not shit posting

 

[Iron Jaguar]

I called my mom a nigger.

I called your mom a nigger.

 

[Chocolate Wombat]

I called your mom a nigger.

What did she do to piss you off? For me it's a weekly occurrence so I can't remember the full context.

 

[Russian Bot]

yeah ya mum was working the fry basket
yeah ya mum was in drive through offering gobbies for nuggets
yeah ya mum was hungry after last night
yeah ya mum was ...

I call that banter not shit posting

I guess you had to know the guy and the situation. It was definitely inappropriate.