Patrick Sean Tomlinson / @stealthygeek / "Torque Wheeler" / @RealAutomanic / Kempesh / Padawan v2.5 - "Conservative" sci-fi author with TDS, armed "drunk with anger management issues" and terminated parental rights, actual tough guy, obese, paid Quasi, paid thousands to be repeatedly unbanned from Twitter

Meriasek said:
Hol' up, Fatpig drunk-replied to a rascal with a tweet by accident, and that outed his alter ego as a fake car blogger?
And immediately some other rascal faked that alter ego to shitpost, and Fatpig is now probably seething at thermonuclear levels because he can't go ahead and make it all about how his stalkers are trying to ruin his life because, well, it's a fake alter ego?
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The shitposting is still ongoing:

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Piggy is having a very quiet night. Given there was a mass shooting today he's usually in the thick of it, but a few tweets about July Forth and that's it.

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Mr Moonface said:
Piggy is having a very quiet night. Given there was a mass shooting today he's usually in the thick of it, but a few tweets about July Forth and that's it.

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Weird he's usually very negative about people violating the law or at least what he imagines the law to be. Then he gets quite enthusiastic about the police state becoming a real threat.

Also, I doubt many people shooting off fireworks are intending it as a "parody ... A pantomime. A mockery" of official fireworks displays, wouldn't those be the parody/pantomime/mockery of freedom instead of the way you wrote it mister professional writer, car blogger and melanin pepperoni enthusiast?
 
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AnOminous said:
Do they know he has a Mustang that is powered by a two-stroke lawnmower engine?
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Falsehoods and lies, child.

Pat's Mustang just has a rusty hole in the driver's footwell so he can propel the car with his feet like Fred Flintstone. Or he would if he wasn't so fat and lazy, he probably forces his next batch of abducted black children to pedal his car for him instead. Look out for this and other automotive tips on Pat's car blog!
 
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The "Pros" in the description for the Blog implies that he plans to have more than one fat Midwestern mechanic larper on staff.

Inb4 Fatrick plays the roles of multiple personas at once, in addition to Torque Wheeler. I thought of a few off the top of my head:

"Cap'n Rotor": The lovable curmudgeon that is fat and has bitch-tits, that writes barely literate blog posts about things that any adult should know.

"Cat Converter": The token female grease monkey that is secretly a man that is fat and has bitch-tits that writes barely literate blog posts about things that any adult should know.
 
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Plastic Love said:
I really cannot understand what Fatrick is trying to accomplish with his auto blog thing. It's clear he knows nothing about cars yet he sells it like he is some master mechanic.
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Patso is very into “fake it til you make it.” He believes it will somehow come true if he digs himself in and continues insisting his lies are reality. He might think most successful people are doing the same thing.

Spud Stacker said:
Probably busy in the basement again.

Niglets wont grind themselves after all...
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The history of the world, my sweet,
Is who gets eaten, and who gets to eat.
But fortunately, it's also clear
That ev'rybody goes down well with beer
 
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I am living for this plot line of him launching a gay anonymous blog, pasting a tweet about it while in a text argument about whether or not he’s obsessed with Twitter, and being completely impotent to complain about being outed and ruthlessly clowned.

No wonder Pat is an atheist. The good Lord stands aside to let Patty fuck himself over and over and over. God loves the pests.
 
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Maude Snew said:
A reminder that this is brought to us by the same genius who named characters Firstname Lastname and Fonald Plumpf. Torque Wheeler is almost believable and would not be out of place for the main character in an 80s action movie so either this is his best work ever or he stole it somewhere.
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I'm pretty sure Pat actually stole his new stage name from a bunch of hot wheels movies from the 2000s named Acceleracers and not an 80s action movie.

Meet Torque (actually spelled Tork in Canon) Maddox, leader of one of the internal factions of the Acceleracers universe, the Metal Maniacs. (I'm sure any simulalarity to automaniac is purely a coincidence).

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And this is Vert Wheeler, the protagonist and chosen one main character of the whole series, despite being unable to actually drive half the time
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Y'know, you'd think someone advertising himself as the "chief grease monkey" and Automanic as some sort of reputable garage of sorts they'd go ahead and use their own pictures of their own garage or at least their own cars, or maybe take specific pictures to underline some points for their blog.
But no, it's all just stock photos or otherwise uncredited random pictures from all over the Internet. Sure hope nobody complains about any licensing issue there.

Actually, maybe this Torque Wheeler guy is just a rando stealing pictures from everywhere, and Piggy's ladymustache, I'm sorry, totally manly Mustang and other car pics are some of them.
 
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It's hilarious to see Fatrick claim to be automotive enthusiast when his entire "passion" is drooling at Ford Mustang which arguably is the most basic bitch sports car there is, probably one with poorfag engine to go with it. Can't wait for him to try to challenge more estabilished channels (i.e. RegularCars) that have sponsorships & renown while he has more detractors than genuine fans, lol
 
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It's amazing he didn't bother changing any of those numbers either but managed to fuck up the coffee icon. Actually, all of this is amazing. The idiots ready to drag him outside and lynch him over some stupid contact forms. His mental state can't be very far from totally cracking this porque thing is just not what anybody who isn't very mentally unwell would do. I hope he starts an investing expert alter-ego soon, in case people don't get angry enough at him for his car destroying (or garden eradicating) advice, they'd probably get pretty angry with him pretty quick when he ruins their life savings instead. Nobody will take his advice though, greater fool theory doesn't apply in Obesetricks case.
 
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Plastic Love said:
I really cannot understand what Fatrick is trying to accomplish with his auto blog thing.
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The blog has WooCommerce installed (an e-commerce plug-in), but not yet in use. Pat and Nikki are the quintessential delusional Dunning–Kruger bums looking for any way to make money that doesn't entail adding economic value, and dropshipping is quite in vogue amongst LARPing "entrepreneurs". He could also make s a few cents a year via referral links potentially.

That's my theory and I suspect they may have other similar sites running for the same purpose, but their Wordpress setup is so unsophisticated that it makes me think they have no experience with this and are just trying it out.

He admitted to owing Quasi on his Twitter meltdown on January 24th, launched this site on February. He's desperate for cash and willing to do anything... except get a job.
 
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Johnny Salami said:
I legit don't understand how he affords his lifestyle. I knew military guys that had a steady paycheck and a room but because of their car purchases they rarely ate out. Did he get disability, using his 1.7 GPA to prove he's retarded?
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So interesting thing about that generation of Mustang, it was a major seller with rental car companies. This means 2-3 years after release they absolutely flooded the market with "low-mileage" mustangs with a mix of about 90% bottom-of-the-barrel V6s and about 10% GTs. This had the knock-on effect of sending the prices for used cars of this model through the floor.

As-pictured it is difficult to fully suss out what happened here. There's stuff removed that someone with a GT would leave on. It harms the value to make it unclear it's a GT. But at the same time there's things like the trunk emblem present. That's one of the easiest to remedy and first to go if you're aiming for a "badgeless" look. Of course anyone that knows, will know it's a dead giveaway it's a V6 with a "dual exhaust" catback meant to look like a GT if that trunk lid badge isn't there. Curious the spoiler from the factory is absent. Almost like a salvage yard was breaking a car down into as many saleable parts as possible.

It's just so weird that all the standard GT tells that are difficult to acquire or cost real money to implement cannot be witnessed. What we can see are the very common parts you could probably order off of LKQ right now. It's probably a thought that goes through many idiot's minds when they start with a catback. They have to browse these places for a bumper with cutouts for the exhaust and their impulse to spend overrides the part of them that would realize how impractical it is.

I'm not going to say with certainty FatPat bought a clapped out ex-rental V6 he desperately wishes had a V8 (why lol? Like Pat the Mustang is bloated, awkward, and clumsy even with the V6. Suspension, brakes, and tires are the first fixes). But damn, if he didn't, he's certainly put a lot of effort into making it look like he did. I would pay so much money to see him try to drive an autocross course in that land yacht.
 
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Plaintiff is fat said:
The blog has WooCommerce installed (an e-commerce plug-in), but not yet in use. Pat and Nikki are the quintessential delusional Dunning–Kruger bums looking for any way to make money that doesn't entail adding economic value, and dropshipping is quite in vogue amongst LARPing "entrepreneurs". He could also make s a few cents a year via referral links potentially.

That's my theory and I suspect they may have other similar sites running for the same purpose, but their Wordpress setup is so unsophisticated that it makes me think they have no experience with this and are just trying it out.

He admitted to owing Quasi on his Twitter meltdown on January 24th, launched this site on February. He's desperate for cash and willing to do anything... except get a job.
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Yeah the site looks like something straight of the template can. Most of them are just AI generated and maybe proofread. Get a bot to churn out an article a week by scraping search engine results, spend a few minutes cleaning up the most egregious grammatical errors and stuff it full of affiliate links. You'll get a few rubes to buy some shit through links per week and generate some passive income. Hosting costs should be negligible so you will usually turn a modest profit on these sites in exchange for near zero work if they're actually SEO'd well. It's basically the lowest common denominator of internet "make money without doing work" schemes.

But knowing Patrick he's not using an AI to write because he's a creative genius who's talent will set his shitty blog apart from the rest. I'd say he's losing out due to opportunity costs but his time is effectively worthless. He considers himself too good for service industry jobs and his creative output is basically zero at this point, Chris's prison letters are higher quality fantasy content than anything I've seen of his written on spec christmas book. He is doing literally nothing with his life.
 
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