Containment What If?

  • 🐕 I am attempting to get the site runnning as fast as possible. If you are experiencing slow page load times, please report it.
He'd try and fight the dictator, but would end up stress sighing, captured by the secret police, who would deem him a complete nonthreat and let him go. After all, even in a world like this, people wouldn't listen to a 30 year old autistic manchild who is a tomgirl. ;)

I think Morgan Freeman should narrate it and Bill Murray should play Chris, for some reason.

Also Patrick Stewart and Samuel L. Jackson both play trolls.
 
Re: What if Chris had a movie about his life? Who would star

Aiko Heiwa said:
Also Patrick Stewart and Samuel L. Jackson both play trolls.
Click to expand...
Totally agree there :D , especially Samuel L. Jackson as he did an awesome job trolling Star Wars so he has experience with that kind of character.


I've always thought Rainn Wilson could likely play a pretty respectable Chris(and/or a very good Mark David Chapman...seriously they look quite similar),
with maybe Peter Woodward to narrate(and have a small role as Snyder the evil Jewish technomage),
Brent Spiner could play a younger Bob and some fat comedian in drag to play Barbara.
 
  • Like
  • Thunk-Provoking
Reactions: Suikafag, AnOminous, Robophobic and 3 others
Re: What if Chris had a movie about his life? Who would star

Chris would star as himself and Sonichu. That way, y'all st-- y'all can save lots of money by only needing one actor.
 
  • Agree
Reactions: Hex Cat and Dr. Silvestrechu
Re: What if Chris had a movie about his life? Who would star

Chris could be the cinematographer too. He's already got (had?) a camera.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Maya
Hmm... assuming that this was a serious biopic, here's who I'd choose:

Chris: Phillip Seymour Hoffman. Granted, PSH is probably too good to play Chris, but he does a great job in portraying very pathetic men. He'd also be willing to do quite a bit to physically resemble Chris.
hoffman.jpg

http://thehungergamesmovies.net/wp-...12/article-0-16A37AB7000005DC-316_634x824.jpg
http://www.iwatchstuff.com/2012/06/12/philip-seymour-hoffman.jpg
http://www.hotflick.net/flicks/2010_Jack_Goes_Boating/010JGB_Philip_Seymour_Hoffman_009.jpg

Bob: John Lithgow. Lithgow could do it, if anyone could. He'd do a good job of the Internet cutting line, anyway.
images

https://encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com/...SYlwYAOhFLtkm_4ydxMhYUSliFjibNa8e6du8GwwfCBhg

Barb: Rosie O'Donnell. O'Donnell is unpleasant enough in general that she'd get Barb's personality across regardless of how she looked. The big problem is that she'd require old person makeup to really get the whole "Barb" look.
2183848792_03cb011152_m.jpg




Snyder: Brian Posehn.
brian-posehn_3.jpg
 
Last edited by a moderator:
  • Winner
Reactions: DatBepisTho, Juan's Sombrero, Hummingbird and 3 others
What if CWC wasn't a 30-something white American Southerner?

If he was born in ancient Rome, he would live with his parents on the farm his dad got in return for serving in the legion. He would pretend to know Attic Greek but mangle it when he spoke it. He'd also combine two Roman gods and write stories about them, thinking they were the greatest myths ever, but everyone else would laugh at him.
 
  • Winner
  • Like
Reactions: Bill Nyehilism, DatBepisTho, Juan's Sombrero and 7 others
He'd pretty much be disowned or just shoved in the back of a closet and his family would pretend he didn't exist.
 
  • Like
Reactions: DatBepisTho
Chris is a dystopian universe? He'd end up dead since there is either a lack of laws or from a loose set of "laws" that frown upon handicapped people. If said dystopian universe was similar to the one from the movie Idiocracy, Chris would just be another citizen, a dumb, ignorant moron who is part of the masses.
 
Chris's isolated welfare lifestyle requires a society that is collectively wealthy enough to provide it, and stable enough that no one would decide to rob him of all his stuff. That's relatively rare in history. Any other time, he'd probably just be a low-normal-functioning individual who nobody really liked.
 
Assuming neither he nor his parents were killed for being mentally deficient or too old to work respectively, he might actually fit in. Assuming something like Stalin or Hitler's cult of personality, he might wind up being the stereotypical dumb jackbooted thug of the state with no thoughts save for party dogma. I don't think he's smart enough to really be a freedom fighter type, to examine a situation, see why it's wrong, and take on the effort and risks to change it.
 
Any hot blonde actresses anyone'd think of to play trollified MLW?
Also any muscly sexy guy actors to play CWCville Universe Chris?

Going through some lists and thought of Scarlett Johannson and Channing Tatum respectively, but I'm not super set on either.
In any case, I think Ellen Page could make a decent Megan if she'd grow in her eyebrows and bangs for the part.
 
DrChristianTroy said:
For whatever reason my mind went to "post apocalyptic" as opposed to dystopian. Chris in a Mad Max scenario would be pretty amazing.
Click to expand...
Imagine him calling Wez or Lord Humongous homos. Man, that would not end well.

Re: What if Chris had a movie about his life? Who would star

Meeko said:
Hmm... assuming that this was a serious biopic, here's who I'd choose:

Chris: Phillip Seymour Hoffman. Granted, PSH is probably too good to play Chris, but he does a great job in portraying very pathetic men. He'd also be willing to do quite a bit to physically resemble Chris.
hoffman.jpg

http://thehungergamesmovies.net/wp-...12/article-0-16A37AB7000005DC-316_634x824.jpg
http://www.iwatchstuff.com/2012/06/12/philip-seymour-hoffman.jpg
http://www.hotflick.net/flicks/2010_Jack_Goes_Boating/010JGB_Philip_Seymour_Hoffman_009.jpg
Click to expand...
He looks perfect to play Chris.

Chris would probably end up a lot worse off. No way he'd have it as easy as he does now.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back