Keffals / Clara Sorrenti / Lucas John Roberts / Queen Clara the Fart Dominatrix / SorrentiThott - Twitter / Twitch slacktivist. Obsessed with being famous. Operator of the Catboy Ranch. Canadian T-Girl porn star and independent Fart Fetish / Findom Dominatrix. Personally sponsored sending Chinese HRT from Brazil to children without parental consent.

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In 1995 I murdered a hooker on the banks of the Talkeetna river in Anchorage Alaska. Her name was Katherine Doter; a petite Native American woman with two kids and dreams of becoming a doctor. I had planned to feed her to the bears, as I had all the others, but to my horror she was a two spirit, and the bears did not recognize the nonbinary bones. Or maybe they just didn't want to eat Inuit. The walls were closing in, but a hand reached out from the darkness. Joshua Conner Moon, 6 foot 5 with rippling muscles and a full beard offered me a devils bargain. My murders would be indirect from then on out, and murder I did. Using the powers of seed and feed, I fed and sed on the souls of infants through IRC channels. Within a decade, sudden infant death syndrome spread from an old wives tale to a all too common occurrence.

However, with these DDOS attacks taking down the site for about 30 minutes every few hours, I fear my ontological evil powers are waning. I've been forced to result to slurping sloppy seconds from the adrenochrome bins in Trumps Piss palace. At this rate, me and the rest of the sinister six won't be able to reinforce Thanos at the seige of hog warts. Damn you Keffels. Damn you to heck.
 
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tfw you don’t have a kiwiggler yet.


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If the site goes down again, I will bravely and stunningly 41% myself because Keffals took away my ability to be a degenerate and fap to Momokun, the only true joy I have left in my miserable life. My blood and cum will be on your hands, Clara.
 
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Keffals has possibly the worst video making skills of any eceleb (z-list or otherwise) I have ever seen. Staring directly into the camera, not moving his head or eyes in any way, completely monotone voice obviously reading off of a script. This is literally middle school history presentation tier videomaking we're dealing with. No wonder his audience is composed of people so easily entertained they can watch him sit and stare at a screen for fucking hours or watch the exact same fish video over and over and over.
 
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Lucas should learn that attempting to remove or cover up this site does not suddenly invalidate every bit of history and documentation recorded on them. What has happened has already happened and it doesn't just go away regardless of where it's hosted. If Kiwifarms goes down forever (which it won't), what's documented and recorded here isn't the only place it's located. He should also learns this is just how the internet works, it's just usually nice to have it organized in a central place.

YumeNoHero said:
There was another DDoS attempt? Looks like 100% site uptime for me.
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They keep forgetting to put another coin of their grifter money into the machine. Too busy dilating.
 
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Skookum Jim said:
Keffals has possibly the worst video making skills of any eceleb (z-list or otherwise) I have ever seen. Staring directly into the camera, not moving his head or eyes in any way, completely monotone voice obviously reading off of a script. This is literally middle school history presentation tier videomaking we're dealing with. No wonder his audience is composed of people so easily entertained they can watch him sit and stare at a screen for fucking hours or watch the exact same fish video over and over and over.
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They are a "streamer", all they usually know how to do is open recording software and turn a webcam on.
 
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I feel like I'm in hurricane season with alternating rolling blackouts and sporadic power, but no one giving a fuck because it happens about 3 times a year or so.

Dr. Matthew C. Harris said:
It's only a trophy if you're not actually MATI.

If you seethe, Keffals gets content. If you stay calm and post normally, Keffals has to reach really hard. And we get funnier content when Keffals isn't just like "see, this dude is TOTALLY mad at me, what an own!". Plus it just makes you look like a guy who gets mad at a bathtub HRT Catboy Ranch groomer, which is not that great a look. Just point and laugh instead!
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It's just like how if he stopped chimping out or embarrassing himself his own thread will dry up. Be like water, go with the flow, take the piss.
 
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