Artcow WogglebugLoveProductions / Cynthia Hanson / Cherie Anne Hapney - One Womanchild's Fruitless Quest to Make Her Cockroach Husbando a Household Name

[Illuminati Order Official]

The problem with Wogglebug is that he is not a fun character. He doesn't really have a kid appeal and is quite boring for adults.

Kids are weird. Friend's kid used to love this cartoon about trains (not Thomas, some rip-off) when he was like 4. And his favorite character was this old steam engine who served as a mentor to younger \ newer trains.

 

[Phil Ken Sebben]

Kids are weird. Friend's kid used to love this cartoon about trains (not Thomas, some rip-off) when he was like 4. And his favorite character was this old steam engine who served as a mentor to younger \ newer trains.

Of course they're weird. They're kids. That's part of their job.

The difference is some of them grow up and while they have a sense of nostalgia for the stuff they watched when younger, it's not a full blown obsession about a giant cockroach. Especially not one that was portrayed in the novels as being a jerk with his head up his own ass.

 

[Ultrapenguin]

Examining The Wogglebug as a non-ironic, genuine IP: I just don't think Wogglebug would ever work as a main character.

Something like Winnie The Pooh is a good character, because he seems a bit childlike, he means well but is naive so that gives a lot of opportunity for growth/learning/adventure. His design is simple, which allows it to be easily drawn but is immediately identifiable. He has very few boldly contrasting colors.
That would be why the most lucrative IPs in the world are Winnie the Pooh, Hello Kitty, Pokemon, and classic Disney cartoons (Mickey Mouse et al). Each of those properties individually beats out Star Wars in franchise value. You're dealing with characters that appeal to children, and which have a lot of memetic potential for adults across cultures.

The Wogglebug is some stuffy asshole who wears a suit and a tophat, and his design is too complex.
He could be a wise character who appears periodically, or at very best a grumpy squidward type. Out of him and Frogman, Frogman would probably be more popular.

Wogglebug as a character is not great for much besides being a tool to fulfill the emotional needs of one specific lonely, spoiled, developmentally stunted woman.

 

[MentorAnnex]

There are quite a few, but not that many...

Spoiler: Spot the troll

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However my personal favorite unironically is this truly beautiful piece that depicts Wogglebug and co going to Genoma's equivalent of the DMV to apply for his licence.

Spoiler: I feel that it perfectly captures the essence of what it's like to watch one of Cherie's many many movies

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Spoiler: subsequently receiving said licence

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Edit: I do not claim to have created any of these masterpieces.
I would credit the artists but, well, you know who you are...

Because of course there's bog standard photoshop anime "art".

 

[White-Kettle Shufflepunk]

Kids are weird. Friend's kid used to love this cartoon about trains (not Thomas, some rip-off) when he was like 4. And his favorite character was this old steam engine who served as a mentor to younger \ newer trains.

Eh, I can understand that from a kid’s perspective. Older mentor figures might remind them of say, their grandparent, or a favourite teacher. That’s probably part of why the original Doctor Who had its appeal. The First Doctor was like your grandpa, but louder, angrier, and with access to a time machine. Cynthia’s Wogglebug couldn’t hope those to match that energy for a number of reasons. One, she sucks and cannot write. Two, he’s ugly, but not in a fun way. Three, he has a voice like a Warhammer grot. Four, rather than paternal warmth, he radiates smugness, but the author agrees with him so it’s not funny. Five, he’s clearly the product of a confused, ignorant sexuality.

 

[Spastic Cologne]

Happy 500 Pages!
Threw this together on my laptop during 11pm to 5am night shift, enjoy?

Spoiler: Lyrics

What Made The Wogglebug Gay?
What Did The Woggle-Bug Say?
A song from the early Oz musical “The Woggle Bug”, 1905.
Words by L. Frank Baum. Music by Paul Tietjens.

Now ev’rybody’s guessing
About the Woggle Bug
What he may be expressing
With smile so sly and smug
They say he’s most discerning
An oracle who “knows”
So all the world is yearning
For the secrets he bestows

What did the Woggle Bug say?
Just put me next to his lay
Can it be Greek? oh, tell me, do
“Sprechen Sie Deutsch” or “Parlez vous?”
I want to know right away
Can’t wait another day
The question makes me furious
Because I’m mighty curious
What did the Woggle Bug say?

If you wonder why an actress
Isn’t happy till divorced
Or why a hobo never works
Unless he’s gently forced
If you’d know why Lipton teases
Us so hard to win our mug
Perhaps you’ll get an answer
If you ask the Woggle Bug

What did the Woggle Bug say?
Just put me next to his lay
Can it be Greek? oh, tell me, do
“Sprechen Sie Deutsch” or “Parlez vous?”
I want to know right away
Can’t wait another day
The question makes me furious
Because I’m mighty curious
What did the Woggle Bug say?

When Dowie made a convert of
A guileless millionaire
When the Czar of all the Russias found
He had a son and heir
When you get a tip on Change that leaves
You stranded on the rocks
Or save a thousand trading-stamps
To get a rattle box

What did the Woggle Bug say?
Just put me next to his lay
Can it be Greek? oh, tell me, do
“Sprechen Sie Deutsch” or “Parlez vous?”
I want to know right away
Can’t wait another day
The question makes me furious
Because I’m mighty curious
What did the Woggle Bug say?

The Woggle Bug forever
Is making some remark
Which may be mighty clever
But leaves us in the dark
It’s most exasperating
And rouses all our ire
Though bugs abominating
We all eagerly enquire

What did the Woggle Bug say?
Just put me next to his lay
Can it be Greek? oh, tell me, do
“Sprechen Sie Deutsch” or “Parlez vous?”
I want to know right away
Can’t wait another day
The question makes me furious
Because I’m mighty curious
What did the Woggle Bug say?

 

[Unexpected Genitals]

Welp, I guess we won't be hearing from Cherie until the site comes back up on the clearnet.

So now we can talk about how massively gay Woggy and Froggy are without interruption!

 

[Coelacanth]

Great. Seeing Cindy repeat the same arguments over and over again was getting really boring anyway.

 

[Loona]

• A few of film festivals that she submitted Sylvie and the Wogglebug have "selected" it as a finalist, quarterfinalist, and honorable mention. What it was exactly selected for is a mystery, as she immediately abandons that train of thought and lists the countries that the festivals are from (Italy, Germany, Serbia)
• She's talked to the plushie "manufacshwer" and will pay half of the fees up front and the other half right before it'll be sent to her.
• The plushies will take about 25 days to ship to her. People will receive their plushies, their copy of the fourth movie, and the updated versions of the first three before Christmas December.

 

[XYZpdq]

Serbia

Ah, well known for their film

 

[Bubble Ba'ath]

The site running like jank[e] and migrating constantly from country to country could never be enough to stop me from celebrating our 500th page milestone!

 

[Cr1ms0n_&_C10v3r]

What it was exactly selected for is a mystery, as she immediately abandons that train of thought and lists the countries that the festivals are from (Italy, Germany, Serbia)

Anyone else find this sus?

 

[Phil Ken Sebben]

Anyone else find this sus?

I find everything about her sus.

 

[lolcow yoghurt]

What it was exactly selected for is a mystery, as she immediately abandons that train of thought and lists the countries that the festivals are from (Italy, Germany, Serbia)

Thank Null for selecting her film

 

[XYZpdq]

Anyone else find this sus?

ehh, if you see the crazy shit that comes out of ex soviet places it's not that crazy they'd dig it

 

[Spastic Cologne]

Anyone else find this sus?

A few of film festivals that she submitted Sylvie and the Wogglebug have "selected" it as a finalist, quarterfinalist, and honorable mention. What it was exactly selected for is a mystery, as she immediately abandons that train of thought and lists the countries that the festivals are from (Italy, Germany, Serbia)

I just wonder how much she had to fork over for the "honor"...

ehh, if you see the crazy shit that comes out of ex soviet places it's not that crazy they'd dig it

Many have about the same overall quality as one of her Wogglebuff movies, if not slightly higher, not to mention being leagues more watchable by sheer virtue of them being actually entertaining...

 

[Woggie's child bride]

Many have about the same overall quality as one of her Wogglebuff movies, if not slightly higher, not to mention being leagues more watchable by sheer virtue of them being actually entertaining...

Nah if Cynthia made it she would just have wogglebug do a premade dance animation while singing lyrics with no backing track while a stock image of the sky scrolls down before awkwardly repeating.

She'd also probably find a way to accidentally add in some pedophilic undertones between woggie and sylvie.

 

[Spastic Cologne]

Nah if Cynthia made it she would just have wogglebug do a premade dance animation while singing lyrics with no backing track while a stock image of the sky scrolls down before awkwardly repeating.

She'd also probably find a way to accidentally add in some pedophilic undertones between woggie and sylvie.

I formally retract my previous statement.

On further investigation I discovered Soviet era animation is in fact the shit, whereas Cherie's movies are just barely animated shit...

Fucking wild!

 

[White-Kettle Shufflepunk]

Cynthia does have a habit of putting in way too much effort for poor results, so watch as she downloads Tor just to correct our Woggle-lore.

 

[Phil Ken Sebben]

I formally retract my previous statement.

On further investigation I discovered Soviet era animation is in fact the shit, whereas Cherie's movies are just barely animated shit...

Fucking wild!

Some Russian animation was amazing. And some of it was utter shit. You know, just like animation from whatever country you're from.

I mean Genndy Tartakovsky is one of the best animators out there today. He was born in Russia to a Russian father and American mother. Meanwhile in this country we have animators that have taken the Cal Arts style and just saturated the market with it.