Inactive Richard "Lowtax" Kyanka - Deadbeat (emphasis on "Dead") founder of Something Awful, forced out of his own community, on his second divorce, stuck his dick in crazy, "Birth Giver"

[Clem Fandango]

It’s funny because that is the one suicide we’re probably actually somewhat, if very indirectly, responsible for. However, everyone fucking hates him, so they can’t use that against us.

Nah, fuck that. No one on here made him beat his missus and waste all his money. That's not how culpability works.

However I will agree that it's funny that no one gives a fuck about Lowtax's actual, for real, stuck-a-gun-in-his-mouth suicide, when they kick up such a fuss about Byuu's fake, never happened, are-you-kidding-me, non-suicide.

 

[Maude Snew]

Nah, fuck that. No one on here made him beat his missus and waste all his money. That's not how culpability works.

However I will agree that it's funny that no one gives a fuck about Lowtax's actual, for real, stuck-a-gun-in-his-mouth suicide, when they kick up such a fuss about Byuu's fake, never happened, are-you-kidding-me, non-suicide.

That's why you always shoot your dick off first for that sweet VINDICATION, gooftroop.

 

[Blewberry Nausea]

We had as much to do with Lowtax’s downfall as we do with him raising his daughters. This fucker was a decadent spoiled brat who never wanted to put effort into anything and lucked out on catching a fad that he could never capitalize on. Because again, effort. He was a complete hedonist with no empathy or compassion beyond some basic shit in that he wasn’t a complete serial killer.

 

[retard strength]

Almost a year later and it still blows my mind how he killed himself instead of paying child support, which he wouldn't have had to do if he'd just been a decent dad and husband the first time instead of crapping out then having another kid with the hostage leafwife, and then developing an unavoidable case of the ol' slippery sweaty toes with his business partner.

Blew his mind too, apparently.

 

[Mega Black]

Every once and a while I come back to read this thread. I realized this time that, while I usually feel bad about these sorts of terrible falls from grace, especially if they end in suicide, I feel almost nothing for Lowtax. A lot of the time it is easy to feel some level of pity or remorse for someone completely fucking their life up at every turn, but he was such a reprehensible fuck that it leaves me, and I'm sure a few others, with a sense almost worse than hate. Apathy.

 

[BScCollateral]

His life was like one of those memes where you can turn left into a bright future or right into a hellscape and he kept choosing the hellscape over and over.

Rake's Progress. No, Internet Funnyman's Progress.

 

[Ghostse]

Every once and a while I come back to read this thread. I realized this time that, while I usually feel bad about these sorts of terrible falls from grace, especially if they end in suicide, I feel almost nothing for Lowtax. A lot of the time it is easy to feel some level of pity or remorse for someone completely fucking their life up at every turn, but he was such a reprehensible fuck that it leaves me, and I'm sure a few others, with a sense almost worse than hate. Apathy.

Lowtax did it all to himself, no one else.

Additionally, there's this nugget to chew on.
Lowtax had been cucked off his forum by FYAD in like 2008. After that point he was an absentee father. This was enough to with occasional posts, get him $20,000 forum upgrades (never happened) another $20,000 for his spine, $25,000 for "mom's chemo", and a $100,000+ a year patreon IN ADDITION to the ~$48,000 the forum was making just on the store.

To get these, Lowtax just needed to make a post pleading poverty, a few follow ups, and then vanish again. Jeffo complained about Lowtax being just completely unreachable most of the time.

All Lowtax would have needed to do to keep $150,000 flowing into his coffers every year was nothing. The admins and mods ran the site for him. ZDR maintained the back end and his only pay was license to fleece gullible goons. He just had to do literally nothing, and instead managed to completely destroy it all.

Like many addicts, His existence was more harmful than nothing.
Nothing would be an improvement.

 

[Hot Dog]

I'm sick of the idea of people blaming other people for their own actions. Lowtax did what he did and committed suicide over his actions and refusal to take responsibility for the choices that he made. No one that he hurt or screwed over or words on the internet forced him to put a gun in his mouth and pull the trigger. That was all Richard.

 

[George Floyd Sneed]

"At least I didn't suck a gigantic sausage on livestream immediately before sucking a handgun in reality after blowing all my child support money on tranny hookers and pies."
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There’s so many layers of hilarity here. My new favorite layer is him being such a lazy fuck that he has a painting* that was hung crooked and then decided that was too much effort and decided not to hang up the other picture. This wasn’t the day he moved in, this was weeks after. Five minutes of effort at most and he couldn’t be assed to get it done.

* - The painting is The Last Supper with him replacing Jesus. Nobody thought this was funny except him. If you reminded him of this, he would get instantly butthurt.

I have the unfounded suspicion covered by zero proof that shmorky is, in fact, dead.

I wish but as we saw, he tried again under a new name, which we promptly found. It’s likely he changed his art style and kept going. It’d be hilarious if he still lived in his parent’s creepy trailer in the middle of the woods. Nigga only made money doing commission work for perverts and whatever few shekels Lowtax tossed his way.

 

[Blewberry Nausea]

Remember between paying child support and buying mobile game bullshit Richard Kyanka died over the latter.

 

[LordofCringe7206 Vol. 2]

We had as much to do with Lowtax’s downfall as we do with him raising his daughters. This fucker was a decadent spoiled brat who never wanted to put effort into anything and lucked out on catching a fad that he could never capitalize on. Because again, effort. He was a complete hedonist with no empathy or compassion beyond some basic shit in that he wasn’t a complete serial killer.

I never understood why some users think we had any role to play in his demise. With Lowtax we did the same exact thing we did with every other retard that has a thread here: watch their drama unfold and chronicle it as it happens.

If anything, I would argue his own forum was more complicit in his death. Them turning on him over the Logan drama and forcing him off the website was likely the straw that broke the camel's back for him mentally. After that, he really felt that he had nothing left to fall back on as things steadily got worse for him.

 

[The Ugly One]

It's not even really fair to say "he got run out of his own forum." This makes him sound passive, when in fact the whole thing happened because he sided with psychotic trannies over relatively normal people, and oops, it turned out the trannies are psychotic, and the normals didn't want him back after he screwed them. All he would have had to do to be somewhat welcome on his own forum is not empower a gang cross-dressers who jerk off to furry porn, and that was too high a bar for him to clear. To be fair, the entire Democratic Party is similarly incapable of this.

 

[AnOminous]

I never understood why some users think we had any role to play in his demise. With Lowtax we did the same exact thing we did with every other retard that has a thread here: watch their drama unfold and chronicle it as it happens.

I'm not saying we actually caused his suicide, just that it would be less unfair to say that we did than any of the other people whose suicides we literally had absolutely nothing to do with (or didn't even happen at all).

 

[Spunt]

Lowtax, Logan and Mandy all had accounts here, and some of the drama played out in this thread while we laughed and jeered at rhem, which is more than you can say of any of the deaths usually linked to the forum. Ultimately Lowtax was entirely the author of his own demise, from the way he alienated his own customers to his decision to eat lead rather than support his children.

 

[Mola Ram]

There’s so many layers of hilarity here. My new favorite layer is him being such a lazy fuck that he has a painting* that was hung crooked and then decided that was too much effort and decided not to hang up the other picture.

I mean, yes, Lowtax was lazy, abominably lazy, but this level of lack of effort says less lazy than "severe clinical depression." I think Lowtax's suicide was a slow-motion affair, and deliberately pissing away his money in such a way to get the divorce court to drop a hammer on him wasn't the cause of it, but just one in a long series of steps that ended with him adding a new modern art piece called A Lolcow's Last Thought next to his Last Supper joke in an intriguing splatter pattern.

 

[Spunt]

I mean, yes, Lowtax was lazy, abominably lazy, but this level of lack of effort says less lazy than "severe clinical depression." I think Lowtax's suicide was a slow-motion affair, and deliberately pissing away his money in such a way to get the divorce court to drop a hammer on him wasn't the cause of it, but just one in a long series of steps that ended with him adding a new modern art piece called A Lolcow's Last Thought next to his Last Supper joke in an intriguing splatter pattern.

He wasn't depressed. He wasn't even really lazy, he just had a very simple and extreme way of prioritising things. If it didn't get him money, sex, food, drugs or booze, it wasn't a priority. If it did though, he'd move heaven and Earth to get it. He flew out from Missouri to Utah to bang Logan. He would even regularly drive from Kansas City to St. Louis just to visit a certain pie shop that he liked. That's a 6-hour round trip. Depressed people don't do 6 hour drives to get pie. Lazy people don't do that either.

He was a total hedonist. His entire life revolved around feeding his basest animal instincts. He was less sophisticated than a caveman - at least cavemen bothered to make sure their cave paintings were straight. Lowtax fuck! Lowtax eat! Lowtax get wasted! That was literally all he thought about. And when it looked like he was going to have to be an adult and rein his lifestyle in for the sake of his children, he chose to check out like a coward. He never grew up, and would literally rather not exist at all than exist in moderation like everyone else.

He genuinely saw himself as a victim despite his destruction being 100% his own fault. Don't mistake self-pity for depression.

 

[AmpleApricots]

Lowtax was the kind of guy you could either offer $10 now or $50 in two hours and he'd always take the $10. As far as Lowtax was concerned everything he fucked up would be a problem for future Lowtax and he didn't like that jerk anyways.

Also reminder that he never once admitted he had any kind of substance abuse problem. Even though on the surface he seemed like a lazy, sniveling fuck he really wasn't at all. I'd even say there was a strange and unsettling intensity about him the few moments the mask came off.

Sadly besides some exceptions he knew better than to puke everything onto the internet. I lowkey still hope one of the older Kyanka daughters will one day come forward and tell us what dealing with him was like. I can't imagine it was easy or pleasant.

 

[blablabla]

momtax died? when the fuck that happened

 

[Pissmaster]

momtax died? when the fuck that happened

IIRC like a month or two after Dick Kyanker repainted his room

 

[AnOminous]

momtax died? when the fuck that happened

She'd had cancer for a while.

So yeah she was a cunt too, but that selfish faggot may have taken away her only reason to keep fighting.