James Rolfe / James D. Rolfe / Angry Video Game Nerd (AVGN) / Rex Viper and Cinemassacre / Screenwave - Now with not much grieving about a 41-year old man still making videos on YouTube. We're the balls on the dick.

[RollerGator]

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Newt (the guy behind the plagiarism scandal for last year's Monster Madness) dishes more details. Of course he has no proof and this isn't the most reliable person but it is interesting.

Then they drag the carcass out and a team of people puppeteer it

That part is spot on

 

[Thumb Butler]

Did a quick search, and the word "balding" is not mentioned once in the book.

 

[BrunoMattei]

I was browsing the Reddit and I honest to god thought this was a parody post. What an arrogant prick. Yeah, whooptedo, you made 90 shitty home movies, you're an expert all right.



OH FUCKING GOD HE PLAYED LENNY IN OF MICE OF MEN! OHMYFUCKINGGOD YOU CAN"T MAKE THIS SHIT UP!

 

[Lupin The Turd]

Duhhh I wanna pet the dragons Mike.

 

[RollerGator]

Duhhh I wanna pet the dragons Mike.

I wanna pet Mike's 10 inch dragon

 

[LordofCringe7206 Vol. 2]

View attachment 4009533

I was browsing the Reddit and I honest to god thought this was a parody post. What an arrogant prick. Yeah, whooptedo, you made 90 shitty home movies, you're an expert all right.

Man, I thought the whole "90 films" thing was just a meme by his detractors. He really is fucking serious isn't he? He is now crossing into complete delusion with some of the things he says. No normal human being who has some sort of passion for film would seriously say that the home movies they made as a kid were a serious part of their resume.

 

[Pissmaster]

Man, I thought the whole "90 films" thing was just a meme by his detractors. He really is fucking serious isn't he? He is now crossing into complete delusion with some of the things he says. No normal human being who has some sort of passion for film would seriously say that the home movies they made as a kid were a serious part of their resume.

Yeah, I remember him doing some celebration years and years ago for some milestone number, and found his official list of "films" he made. I can't find at the moment, but I remember being surprised that he counted even just completely pointless bullshit he filmed as a child on a lark. That's like, less deserving of being called a film than random shitpost clips I've made, like this duology I made to mock Hogan:

There used to be a lot of odds and ends on cinemassacre.com, like this FAQ page where you can see some of his sperginess: https://web.archive.org/web/20100411053524/http://www.cinemassacre.com/faq/

WHAT ARE YOUR FAVORITE ANIMALS?​

I like squirrel monkeys, pygmy marmosets, owls, domestic & wild cats, dogs, and frogs. And yeah, they’re actually used to be a page about this here. But it’s not exactly a frequently asked question.

Anyone wanna hunt around and find that page?

He also had complete lists of his game collections: https://web.archive.org/web/20100411044204/http://www.cinemassacre.com/2007/03/22/game-collection That hub is down, but the lists themselves are still live, like http://www.cinemassacre.com/AVGN/collection/NES.html. I put NES, SNES, and N64 through both archive.today and ghostarchive.org, but there are a lot, so if anyone wants to run through the rest and archive them, please do. They're probably dreadfully out of date, but whatever, archive everything.

--------------------

edit: found his official movie list
https://web.archive.org/web/20080225160758/http://www.cinemassacre.com/Home_page/frameset.html

A few examples:

5. Batman Returns Again (puppets)
Approx. 25 minutes
Inspired by Tim Burton's two Batman movies, I decided to make the next sequel on my own using Batman figures. This movie is just as much fun as watching a little kid playing with toys, whichever way you want to look at that.

Because that is literally what it is. Also, it's listed as a 1993 film, so he would have been 12-13 at the time.

91. Devil's Child
5 minutes
I have a little evil black cat named Moody who hates people. If you try to pet her, she'll claw and bite without mercy. I videotaped her whenever I had the chance and eventually I compiled the best footage into a music video of the Judas Priest song "Devil's Child." When she stares at you in the dark with those glowing eyes, you will believe that she is from hell.

He put a song to clips of his ornery cat.

93. Poltergeist in an Alleyway
3 minutes
This is a compilation of some of the 16mm film experiments I did in my first semester Sophomore film class.

It's literally just his homework from that day

71. More Human Than Human: music video
5 minutes
I wanted to get a fake band together for a White Zombie music video, but we didn't have any instruments available, so the guitarist had to rock out on an acoustic guitar and the drummer just sat on a bed and slapped two dummy monster heads. It was real funny. The song on the CD played into my vcr which was connected to my camera, so the videotape recorded us on the video signal and the music simultaneously on the audio signal. The TV was turned on, blasting the music from its speaker, so we could perform to it and I could lip sync the vocals in my black top hat and long hair wig. After copying the best take onto another videotape, I inserted stock footage of old horror movies of mine to complete it.

72. Foreign Spies Online
2 minutes
My mom got me a video title maker for Christmas, so I could add credits and titles in my movies. My first movie to use this device was this experimental video with my sister and her friend speaking a foreign language and I translated it with subtitles.

Just dig into that list for yourself. Try to find a lower effort film than just footage of his sister & her friends speaking a foreign language, and then he subtitles it. That's film #72, ladies and gentlemen, from the world's luckiest autistic filmmaker, James Duncan Rolfe.

 

[Pissmaster]

I wonder if you can get James to say the N word if you confidently say to him "THE SHERIFF IS A-" and then point to him and make direct eye contact, prompting him to finish the line

 

[mlanguishi]

There doesn't seem to be a Chris Stuckman thread anywhere I can find, but he's another autist trying to make a 'real movie' now too. He egrifted a real big amount for it.

$1,390,845​

pledged of $250,000 goal​

 

[I Love Beef]

View attachment 4009533

I was browsing the Reddit and I honest to god thought this was a parody post. What an arrogant prick. Yeah, whooptedo, you made 90 shitty home movies, you're an expert all right.

View attachment 4009539

OH FUCKING GOD HE PLAYED LENNY IN OF MICE OF MEN! OHMYFUCKINGGOD YOU CAN"T MAKE THIS SHIT UP!

I'd yell something about how James is acting like a manchild, but he really is. This is like, Chris Chan levels of achievement. At the same time, I have a feeling that ScreenWave is also behind this sort of push for James to pull off for some desperate PR attempt (or some sick idea of turning James into a laughing stock for their own shit, but that's my tin foil hat theory). I'm no expert on the affairs of Cinemassacre, but I highly doubt Mike would have told James that this autobiography was a great idea.

James may be a halfassing self absorbed somewhat narcissistic fathead, but he's also autistic and somewhat of a tard, which kind of excuses him. ScreenWave though, they stink worse than an open sewage treatment plant. I got this from the Cinemassacre Monster Madness of the Assholish Variety, but I wouldn't doubt that shit like money laundering and some transparent power politics are going around in that shithole.

 

[LordofCringe7206 Vol. 2]

Yeah, I remember him doing some celebration years and years ago for some milestone number, and found his official list of "films" he made. I can't find at the moment, but I remember being surprised that he counted even just completely pointless bullshit he filmed as a child on a lark. That's like, less deserving of being called a film than random shitpost clips I've made, like this duology I made to mock Hogan:
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View attachment 4010625

There used to be a lot of odds and ends on cinemassacre.com, like this FAQ page where you can see some of his sperginess: https://web.archive.org/web/20100411053524/http://www.cinemassacre.com/faq/


Anyone wanna hunt around and find that page?

He also had complete lists of his game collections: https://web.archive.org/web/20100411044204/http://www.cinemassacre.com/2007/03/22/game-collection That hub is down, but the lists themselves are still live, like http://www.cinemassacre.com/AVGN/collection/NES.html. I put NES, SNES, and N64 through both archive.md and ghostarchive.org, but there are a lot, so if anyone wants to run through the rest and archive them, please do. They're probably dreadfully out of date, but whatever, archive everything.

--------------------

edit: found his official movie list
https://web.archive.org/web/20080225160758/http://www.cinemassacre.com/Home_page/frameset.html

A few examples:

Because that is literally what it is. Also, it's listed as a 1993 film, so he would have been 12-13 at the time.


He put a song to clips of his ornery cat.


It's literally just his homework from that day





Just dig into that list for yourself. Try to find a lower effort film than just footage of his sister & her friends speaking a foreign language, and then he subtitles it. That's film #72, ladies and gentlemen, from the world's luckiest autistic filmmaker, James Duncan Rolfe.

This wouldn't be so bad if he wasn't treating this so seriously. I was into filmmaking as a kid and wanted to be a director at one point. I could see somebody who went down that path talking about how the got into video making when they were young and showing off some of their projects from when they were a kid.

But James is really treating this stuff like it is portfolio items for his career. It is autistic on a whole other level. This is the kind of stuff that make me question how James can even function as a human being in everyday life.

 

[Product Placement]

He put a song to clips of his ornery cat.

What the hell, maybe just don't pet the cat. Not all cats like to be petted, some have petting induced aggression. My cat is much the same, so I let him be and he likes to just chill near me because he knows he is safe from that bullshit.

People who treat pets as toys are the worse. Much like humans they have personal boundaries which should be respected.

 

[Jason Wynn]

Lmao how he hasn’t overdosed on copium is astounding

If he’s a filmmaker than I guess I’m an author for all the D&D adventures I wrote in high school, or I’m a sous chef because I made fried eggs and toast for breakfast, maybe I’m a world renowned card shark because I won a few poker hands last game.

James, this is pathetic

 

[Thumb Butler]

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OH FUCKING GOD HE PLAYED LENNY IN OF MICE OF MEN! OHMYFUCKINGGOD YOU CAN"T MAKE THIS SHIT UP!

Not only that, his brilliant performance had people cheer so much "they stood on their chairs".

I'm not surprised. He did invent Shit Pickle after all.

 

[BrunoMattei]

Not only that, his brilliant performance had people cheer so much "they stood on their chairs".

I'm not surprised. He did invent Shit Pickle after all.

Shit Pickle was created by Mike.

 

[Thumb Butler]

Shit Pickle was created by Mike.

I stand corrected. Frankly, I should have guessed as much.

 

[I.B. Niggin]

Yeah, the book was a total mistake.

There's no doubt James is an embarrassing retard anymore.

No normal fucking person would be talking about this kind of stuff in the adulthood with a glimmer in their eye.

 

[BrunoMattei]

Yeah, the book was a total mistake.

There's no doubt James is an embarrassing retard anymore.

No normal fucking person would be talking about this kind of stuff in the adulthood with a glimmer in their eye.

I wonder if the whole thing was just a joke to Screenwave or they didn't care and just wanted their cut? Because a friend would tell you not to put this out or at least get a real editor to help you. It's either that or James didn't want to listen to anyone else.

 

[demicolon]

I'd yell something about how James is acting like a manchild, but he really is. This is like, Chris Chan levels of achievement. At the same time, I have a feeling that ScreenWave is also behind this sort of push for James to pull off for some desperate PR attempt (or some sick idea of turning James into a laughing stock for their own shit, but that's my tin foil hat theory). I'm no expert on the affairs of Cinemassacre, but I highly doubt Mike would have told James that this autobiography was a great idea.

James may be a halfassing self absorbed somewhat narcissistic fathead, but he's also autistic and somewhat of a tard, which kind of excuses him. ScreenWave though, they stink worse than an open sewage treatment plant. I got this from the Cinemassacre Monster Madness of the Assholish Variety, but I wouldn't doubt that shit like money laundering and some transparent power politics are going around in that shithole.

There was a suspected Mike sockpuppet who stated that telling James the truth about the movie would be the end of their friendship. If there's any truth to this (and knowing Mike's expressions when James was saying stupid shit during J&M Mondays) then I doubt anyone near James would bother to stop him publishing this.

Chris was also autistic and a tard, but nobody denied that he would be rotten to the core even if he was normotypical.

Stinkwave certainly had their hands in multiple shitpiles, but I doubt more and more that they did any intentional harm to James's business. They're doing everything and handing out cue cards for James to read before a camera, all for a 20% profit cut or something, all the while James fucks around with ceiling spotlights or copying 400 TB of his childhood movies over a month, then complaining about being overworked.

Big Ryan fan btw.

 

[BrunoMattei]

There was a suspected Mike sockpuppet who stated that telling James the truth about the movie would be the end of their friendship. If there's any truth to this (and knowing Mike's expressions when James was saying stupid shit during J&M Mondays) then I doubt anyone near James would bother to stop him publishing this.

Chris was also autistic and a tard, but nobody denied that he would be rotten to the core even if he was normotypical.

Stinkwave certainly had their hands in multiple shitpiles, but I doubt more and more that they did any intentional harm to James's business. They're doing everything and handing out cue cards for James to read before a camera, all for a 20% profit cut or something, all the while James fucks around with ceiling spotlights or copying 400 TB of his childhood movies over a month, then complaining about being overworked.

Big Ryan fan btw.

The funny thing to me is that he self-published it on Amazon. It's a print on demand thing. So, he didn't need to give Screenwave anything. But he either signed a contract or "paid" for their services to assist him in their meticulous attention to editing the fucking thing. So he is an absolute god damn retard. Here, let me give someone 20% from the profits of MY book for doing absolutely fucking nothing except maybe transferring an Apple word processor file to MSWord and calling it a day.