Kind of freaking out after stage 2 education appointment.
Hi, so I just had a virtual education appointment regarding my stage 2 surgery, which is supposed to be on March 1st. A little background info: I just had stage 1 RFF with Dr. Rachel Bluebond-Langner on November 16th. It was phallus creation only - no urethral lengthening yet and my natal genitalia was left relatively untouched. I was under the impression that the second stage would include vaginectomy, scrotoplasty, glansplasty, UL, and burial.
Well, when I had my education appointment today, I had some questions about burial because I honestly didn't get much info from them about it yet. I assumed that burial would be in the phallus shaft and that it would include nerve hookup so I would have erotic sensation and the nerves would "branch out" as they grew into my phallus. To my surprise, she told me that burial would be in the scrotum,
and that it wouldn't be included in stage 2?? I asked when it would be done, then, and she said "somewhere between stage 2 and stage 3." At this point, I was kind of freaked out because firstly, I wanted the burial to be at the base of my dick so my dick would feel like an extension of my natal genitalia. Secondly, nobody told me that burial wouldn't be in the second stage. If it was supposed to happen between stage 2 and stage 3, then wouldn't that make it stage 3? It makes no sense to me, and I'm bewildered that it wasn't brought up to me until now. Maybe it's my fault for assuming, but I feel like this is not normally the way things are staged with RFF.
On top of that, I asked how nerve hookup would work/what erotic sensation would entail, and she said that there wasn't any hookup to my natal genitalia. This was also a surprise to me, and it made me start freaking out even more because how the hell am I supposed to have erotic sensation in my dick if there's no hookup to my natal genitalia? Am I missing something here? I feel like after I told them in my consultation that sensation is my biggest priority, they should have told me this. The lady I was having my appointment with said that she would set up an appointment with the surgeon and urologist so that I can clear things up more with them, but I do
not feel confident right now. If I can't get burial in the second stage, and if there is no nerve hookup, then I made a huge mistake here.
Has anyone else had similar staging who can give some insight as to how everything will end up? I'm seriously upset because now that I've started this with RBL, I'm basically stuck with her as my surgeon for the next two stages (or more, since apparently she doesn't do burial in stage 2). Has anyone gone to a different surgeon for their second stage? I feel like even if I could find a surgeon who would agree to work with me and give me what I actually want, I would have to wait a ridiculously long time for it. I just don't know what to do.
