Plagued Consoomers / Consoomer Culture - Because if it has a recogniseable brand on it, I’d buy it!

[Lady Bizness]

The

The man was a raw food vegan, which makes normal vegans look like paragons of reason and sanity in comparison.

Here's a pretty good video on the juciero.

Back in the day when I said, "eat the rich", this is who I was talking about, but these days the skilless underemployed gender studies people are looking at my family and our property like we're assholes. Gweneth Paltrow and the methhead turning tricks in her tent by the drainage ditch are the same person as far as human value goes.

Fucking raw water. So basically steal water from good sources and slap a high price tag on it because stupid people of a certain class and a fear of mortality will buy it.

 

[std::string]

Fucking raw water. So basically steal water from good sources and slap a high price tag on it because stupid people of a certain class and a fear of mortality will buy it.

He has some kind of biohacking/life extension/self-improvement podcast with his wife now and that seems like a pretty good grift if you can get it.

Silicon Valley tech workers with absurd amounts of disposable income who are terrified of the fact that they'll die some day while wondering what their life was all about? Juicero guy is gonna get their ducats.

 

[Jonah Hill poster]

I forgot you could win Guinness World Records with consooming



At least he’s happy with his collection.

 

[Zbk3VmLfujjzjxBd43tL]

Happy New Years, let's start it off with a vintage Apple consoomer.

 

[WelperHelper99]

Happy New Years, let's start it off with a vintage Apple consoomer.
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Listen I'm into old tech, but I pods? My guy, get off the Apple train and focus the autism elsewhere

 

[PipTheAlchemist]

My guy, get off the Apple train and focus the autism elsewhere

Autists can't exactly choose where they focus their autism

 

[Elysian]

Listen I'm into old tech, but I pods? My guy, get off the Apple train and focus the autism elsewhere

Old iPods are pretty repairable and moddable so you can give them loads of storage and replace the batteries and stuff. I’ve got a 256gb modded iPod mini for my music hoard and it’s pretty cool. There’s no need to have 9 of them at once, although I have a feeling most of these are modding projects due to the lack of iPod nanos in this guy’s collection (all of the nano models are a nightmare to work on so there’s no mods for any of them).

 

[WelperHelper99]

Old iPods are pretty repairable and moddable so you can give them loads of storage and replace the batteries and stuff. I’ve got a 256gb modded iPod mini for my music hoard and it’s pretty cool. There’s no need to have 9 of them at once, although I have a feeling most of these are modding projects due to the lack of iPod nanos in this guy’s collection (all of the nano models are a nightmare to work on so there’s no mods for any of them).

Now at least that I understand. Heck in this guy's case, if he'd had a little cottage modding buisness, at that point I'd clap. But as you said, 9 at once. The most my autism goes is having at least one Xbox for each generation, even then, I'm not collecting every variant, I'd go poor.

 

[Kalsarikännit]

Apple consoomers are absolute garbage and help make sure Apple can churn out a new phone every year and rip you off with their planned obsolescence bullshit. No reason you can't just use an old-ass smartphone for years on end (except for Apple slowing your phone down with updates to make sure that you too become a consoomer).

Apple has a consoomer following to be sure, but their products are also very reliable. I finally upgraded both my phone and laptop recently, and I was using the first gen iPhone SE and an 8 year old MacBook Pro. I only upgraded the MacBook Pro because the hard drive was starting to fail, but I’ve replaced that and it’s still a good backup computer.
People who chase Apple’s dragon are very cultish indeed, but unlike worthless figurines their hardware is usually relevant and usable for a good long while.

I just felt like this bore saying, since the product they make is legitimately useful to people past the satisfaction of consooming.

 

[gamer2014]

I get using a meal replacement products to replace a meal. Hell, I know I should with Breakfast because I'm often far too lazy to make anything before work.

But the main reason why Soylent became the defacto Bug-person drink meme is because there are literal autist too fucking lazy to stop what they're doing for 10-16 hours a day to take a fucking break and get some actual food. I use that time I have making food or God forbid, actually driving to pick up my Goddamn take-out, to reflect on the day so far and maybe work out some problems that come up. Bug-people can't do that, thinking and reflecting gives them the bad feel-feels and they can't have that. Got to consoome product and get excited for the next product and adulting is hard.

so kinda like Huel then. Drank it once a few years back and got chest pains.

https://huel.com

 

[Merton J. Dingle]

I forgot you could win Guinness World Records with consooming

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At least he’s happy with his collection.

That is the face of a man that does not and will not ever have a modicum of wisdom.

 

[Jonah Hill poster]

I’m almost a year older this month, and it hasn’t been proven wrong yet.

 

[Jonah Hill poster]

Only 30 days?

I’m surprised he didn’t do it for over 30 years.

 

[Nikes_JustDoIt]

Only 30 days?

I’m surprised he didn’t do it for over 30 years.

Is this the black version of super size me?

 

[Danone]

I still don't get why would anyone spend this much on stuff like this.





These things are getting near their expiration date. They're going to rot. The software is available online and you can easily play them there.

 

[Nuclear Poisoning]

Calvin did Soylent before it was cool (1991).

Is it because he's a hallucinating schizo who is unable to appreciate his mom's wholesome home-cooking, or is his mom's wholesome home-cooking actually legitimately revolting, making him completely ignorant of good food? Who knows. But people IRL who end up wanting such a product probably are either autists with a poor grip on reality, or unfortunate enough to have grown up in a household where nobody has cooking skills, which makes this strip even more accurate.

 

[NoReturn]

his mom's wholesome home-cooking actually legitimately revolting, making him completely ignorant of good food?

I mean, have you SEEN her cooking?

And before you say "That's just how Calvin sees it" here's a comic where Dad can't even figure out what it is:

 

[Ultrapenguin]

Calvin did Soylent before it was cool (1991).

View attachment 4200984

Is it because he's a hallucinating schizo who is unable to appreciate his mom's wholesome home-cooking, or is his mom's wholesome home-cooking actually legitimately revolting, making him completely ignorant of good food? Who knows. But people IRL who end up wanting such a product probably are either autists with a poor grip on reality, or unfortunate enough to have grown up in a household where nobody has cooking skills, which makes this strip even more accurate.

Eh, idk, I think in that comic he's doing it for the same reason the efficiency-worshipping bugmen do.

The joke there is that yes, he is technically correct, your stomach won't know the difference and you don't have to chew. It would also save space in your lunch just stuffing everything into one thermos.
However despite what he's saying being correct, it completely neglects the actual experience of eating; just because an idea is new and "efficient" doesn't make it worthwhile.

The difference is that current day bugmen would look at that girl acting disgusted and declare her an unenlightened, regressive idiot, then go on Reddit to discuss how anyone who believes traditional activities like enjoying home-cooked meals are worthwhile are probably horrible people who vote republican and should be forced to submit to their objectively correct new-age thinking. Eat the bugs, bigot.

I mean, have you SEEN her cooking?
View attachment 4201168
And before you say "That's just how Calvin sees it" here's a comic where Dad can't even figure out what it is:
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Well that's just because Calvin inherited his psychotic tendencies from his father, who is also completely detached from reality.

#calvinsmomdidnothingwrong

 

[Zbk3VmLfujjzjxBd43tL]

I still don't get why would anyone spend this much on stuff like this.

View attachment 4199562

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These things are getting near their expiration date. They're going to rot. The software is available online and you can easily play them there.

Isn't Panzer Dragoon Saga still difficult to play on an emulator because Saturn emulation sucks, or am I a few years out of date on that?

 

[Nuclear Poisoning]

I mean, have you SEEN her cooking?

And before you say "That's just how Calvin sees it" here's a comic where Dad can't even figure out what it is:

I'm more for the "That's just how he sees it" paradigm. There are indeed a couple instances where the dad seems put off by her cooking as well (another iteration of that strip is with spider pie instead of monkey heads), but in those cases I think it's more him being easily swayed by her graphic descriptions. More likely though, it's just a character inconsistency in the service of a punchline, since as brilliant as C&H is, it's still a comic strip, not a novel. But he does worship bland oatmeal after-all, and is, as Uberpenguin mentions, a psychotic, proto-Thoreau/TedK, as is Watterson himself. He strikes me more as someone who would immediately dismiss any dish that is slightly out of the ordinary and brand it disgusting rather than appreciate the novelty, all in the name of keeping it simple. Why mix so many spices together to make some "gross" curry when there's already salt and pepper?
To keep it on topic, the mentality is like the other face of the foodie consoomer coin, where there is a superficial appreciation of diverse and fancy food, but it's only skin deep, since the motivation for experiencing all that food is just to fill a bunch of checkmarks, rather than it being part of some larger cultural exchange or something. I dunno, I'm kind of rambling and strawmanning now. It seems inevitable that the offspring of both kinds of people (Calvin's dad who hates fancy food on principle, and the foodies who have no idea how to cook themselves and have never been outside a large city) will end up completely confused and see no value in food beyond the pure nourishment.