*GRAPHIC* 6 Week Post-op Update!
Friends: tomorrow I am six weeks post-op my third operation! It feels like it's been a lifetime. I remember
u/d00leys telling me to keep an eye on that six week mark and that around then, I would start to feel more like a human being. Truer words have never been spoken. I feel like a different guy, even from like one or two weeks ago!
I had my last in person post-op appointment for a while on Tuesday. Everyone was really thrilled with how things were looking. I was finally cleared to drive and start experimenting with wearing more tight fitting clothing (ie. Not sweatpants, lmao). I don't have to do anything to my arm anymore as far as wound care, I'm just massaging it often and doing ice and compression for swelling. The swelling can be annoying, but it doesn't happen all the time and usually rest, ice, and compression really helps. I'm still doing lots of hand/wrist exercises, and my mobility gets better every day. I also got a date for stage two! I'm going in for scrotoplasty, glansplasty, UL, and v-nectomy 9/15/23. I could have gone sooner, but stage one really took me out and I needed the break.
I drove for the first time today, it was about a half hour drive one way and it went really well. It's still somewhat uncomfortable to sit up but it's not unbearable by any means. I get less scared every day that sitting at a 90° angle will make my dick fall off. I've just been carefully bending to get things off the floor, putting socks and shoes on, and gently reaching for my feet to get practice with how that feels. I'm still incredibly swollen in my stomach, groin, and upper thighs, so it's still pretty uncomfortable/tight to move anything in that area.
Pain is minimal these days. I have two main types of pain: the general muscle soreness/swelling pain of surgery and nerve pain. The soreness is controlled well with ibuprofen and rest and the nerve pain is controlled with gabapentin. Right now, I'm trying to wean off of the gabapentin, so I'm getting more nerve pain than usual. It's random electric shock or itchy type pain anywhere I had surgery. I get it in my hand, my legs, and in my natal genitalia where I had the hematoma. It's uncomfortable but not unbearable and I know once my nerves settle down it will get better.
Y'all, I cannot tell you how amazing it feels to have a bulge! Long ago, I tried a packer, and I remember being so thrilled about the bulge but often wearing a packer would make my dysphoria much worse. To look down and see that bulge again is honestly incredible. I also just love the way I look standing up. I feel like my dick fits my body so well and I'm finally feeling some sort of joy at having done the surgery.
The underside and tip of my penis are healing really well. RBL says that she can smooth everything out aesthetically on the underside during stage two and that the only issue I may run into is that my urethra may not run all the way to the tip. It's a small bummer because I really wanted the look of the urethral opening, but honestly with everything that's happened it's a bump in the road. I am a little tired of having to dress the wounds every day. I can't wait till I'm all closed up and I really feel like myself.
My energy has been the biggest issue I have had. I am exhausted a lot of the time, and doing minor chores and stuff like that can be pretty difficult. I'm doing a lot of quiet activities at home to keep busy. I picked up watercolor painting and drawing again, and I have been talking to a few people who are in the process of scheduling with RBL so that really keeps me feeling fulfilled. I think it's going to be a while before I'm back to my more physical activities, but I'm trying to be as patient as possible. I go back to work in about a week and I'm a little nervous, but I sit down all day for my job and they're very accommodating.
All in all I am getting back to feeling like myself. I am no where near 100%, but I feel like I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. I really want to take a moment to stress how difficult this surgery can be. I know some people heal really well and very quickly but that just wasn't my experience. With every other surgery I've had (top, revision, hysto, and knee surgery) I've healed super fast and been back up and about before I was supposed to be. Phallo is a whole different ballgame. It hit me like a truck emotionally and physically, and I really thought I was prepared. Now, I'm really happy with how things are going but I felt really dark for a long time. The only things that kept me as positive as I was were my wife and you all. Please feel free to ask any questions, and thank you all for your support as always!