حلال Connor Bible - Everyone's Favorite Molly Ringwald loving, adoption hating, aspiring writer and bellybutton fucker

[ToroidalBoat]

I miss Connor, so I wrote him some fan fiction.

I think Connor may not be coming back this time.

Spoiler

Good read, but what happened to the paragraph breaks?

 

[Ambivalenz]

@Jaimas The reference links on the lolcow wiki for Connor don´t work (anymore). All four of them lead to error messages here on the Farms. Did he delete those comments you linked to?

(not sure where else to post this, sorry for that, just in case you´re not aware of it.)

 

[Jaimas]

@Jaimas The reference links on the lolcow wiki for Connor don´t work (anymore). All four of them lead to error messages here on the Farms. Did he delete those comments you linked to?

(not sure where else to post this, sorry for that, just in case you´re not aware of it.)

Connor's article wasn't done by me, so I haven't the foggiest. Most likely scenario is that those comments were fucking old and got pushed off the board given sufficient age. It happens. @Randall Fragg, @Smutley, and @hood LOLCOW are the ones primarily responsible for that one, so they might be able to give you a bit more information.

 

[Ambivalenz]

Connor's article wasn't done by me, so I haven't the foggiest. Most likely scenario is that those comments were fucking old and got pushed off the board given sufficient age. It happens. @Randall Fragg, @Smutley, and @hood LOLCOW are the ones primarily responsible for that one, so they might be able to give you a bit more information.

My bad. Somehow I got the idea you write all the articles. I just leave them here for those in the know to look over.

It boasts an impressive 29 single spaced pages.[1] Connor's writing is marked by attempts to be dark, nihilistic, and edgy, in accordance with his angsty writer persona. However, his ineptitude as a writer results in his work containing things too absurd to take seriously, such as a teacher masturbating to death in class, [2] a talking gorilla with racist implications, [3] and a school nurse openly dealing heroin. [4]

https://kiwifarms.net/threads/connor-bible.7044/page-156#post-548205
https://kiwifarms.net/threads/connor-bible.7044/page-115#post-533187
https://kiwifarms.net/threads/connor-bible.7044/page-91#post-517756
https://kiwifarms.net/threads/connor-bible.7044/page-38#post-494325

Edit: Huh? Now I´ve no clue anymore. When I follow the links from lolcow wiki to the Farms I get error messages, but the links work just fine on the Farms itself? *confused look*

 

[BILLY MAYS]

Connor's article wasn't done by me, so I haven't the foggiest. Most likely scenario is that those comments were fucking old and got pushed off the board given sufficient age. It happens. @Randall Fragg, @Smutley, and @hood LOLCOW are the ones primarily responsible for that one, so they might be able to give you a bit more information.

Nah actually I just added Connor's dox to the infobox after the whole selling out to Vordrak saga, probably will look it up later.

Huh? Now I´ve no clue anymore. When I follow the links from lolcow wiki to the Farms I get error messages, but the links work just fine on the Farms itself? *confused look*

Interesting.. maybe the reference links should be changed to archive links, maybe it will help.

EDIT: fixed the references for now

Spoiler: wtf happened

The references are messed up, it uses {{kiwi|<kiwi thread url}} reference, which returns to kiwifarms.net/<kiwi thread url> instead of the right url.

 

[Handsome Pete]

@Jaimas The reference links on the lolcow wiki for Connor don´t work (anymore). All four of them lead to error messages here on the Farms. Did he delete those comments you linked to?

(not sure where else to post this, sorry for that, just in case you´re not aware of it.)

Connor's article wasn't done by me, so I haven't the foggiest. Most likely scenario is that those comments were fucking old and got pushed off the board given sufficient age. It happens. @Randall Fragg, @Smutley, and @hood LOLCOW are the ones primarily responsible for that one, so they might be able to give you a bit more information.

Nah actually I just added Connor's dox to the infobox after the whole selling out to Vordrak saga, probably will look it up later.

Interesting.. maybe the reference links should be changed to archive links, maybe it will help.

A quick look at the page suggests that the reference links all use some kind of fancy formatting that I couldn't find on any other pages (although my search was hardly exhaustive). I'm guessing it either no longer works, or was never implemented in the first place.

Spoiler: Weird link

I was about to fix it myself, but I have zero wiki editing experience, and this is weird enough to be someone's pet project that I'm probably better off not fucking with.

 

[GV 998]

Please, someone tell me what the hell Connor does with his day. Like, why hasn't he written like, 40 novels by now? He has no job, very little school, and no friends.

What causes his laziness? Does he play video games? Is that what's dragging him down? Because I don't believe I've ever heard him mention playing video games (although it's highly possible I've missed it) He does mention watching movies a lot. Is that what it is? Or does he, in fact, sit alone in silence, in his room, pondering oblivion while playing with himself?

 

[Ruin]

Please, someone tell me what the hell Connor does with his day. Like, why hasn't he written like, 40 novels by now? He has no job, very little school, and no friends.

What causes his laziness? Does he play video games? Is that what's dragging him down? Because I don't believe I've ever heard him mention playing video games (although it's highly possible I've missed it) He does mention watching movies a lot. Is that what it is? Or does he, in fact, sit alone in silence, in his room, pondering oblivion while playing with himself?

He watches tons of movies and is a member of about fifty different forums. I don't believe I've ever heard him mention playing videogames.

 

[Ryker]

sit alone in silence, in his room, pondering oblivion while playing with himself?

I think that you have encapsulated Connor's raison d'être very well indeed.

 

[GV 998]

He watches tons of movies and is a member of about fifty different forums. I don't believe I've ever heard him mention playing videogames.

so he is literally watching movies and whining to people on the internet...all day...every day...Good use of your time there, Connor. I'm sure that work attitude will take him far on his path to being a best-selling author

 

[Ntwadumela]

He watches tons of movies and is a member of about fifty different forums. I don't believe I've ever heard him mention playing videogames.

His biggest problem is that he fails to be the master of his life that one achieves by having many varied interests. It is this lack of mastery that results in him being a flawed human being.

 

[Jaimas]

Please, someone tell me what the hell Connor does with his day. Like, why hasn't he written like, 40 novels by now? He has no job, very little school, and no friends.

What causes his laziness? Does he play video games? Is that what's dragging him down? Because I don't believe I've ever heard him mention playing video games (although it's highly possible I've missed it) He does mention watching movies a lot. Is that what it is? Or does he, in fact, sit alone in silence, in his room, pondering oblivion while playing with himself?

He cries into his pillow about being adopted.

 

[HG 400]

I miss Connor

I don't.

 

[Smutley]

He used to play the hell out of Mortal Kombat on Ps2 until he lost his memory card. Now he watches old 80's action movies while pretending they are high art and tries to play GTA5 (but the 3 characters are too complicated!!)

 

[Count groudon]

so he is literally watching movies and whining to people on the internet...all day...every day...Good use of your time there, Connor. I'm sure that work attitude will take him far on his path to being a best-selling author

He also has several violent, seemingly random fits of masturbation throughout his day as well.

 

[MrsFrizzle]

He cries into his pillow about being adopted.

About other people being adopted, you mean. That's the weirdest part about Connor's obsession with adoption, that he's not adopted himself.

 

[Meowthkip]

About other people being adopted, you mean. That's the weirdest part about Connor's obsession with adoption, that he's not adopted himself.

I almost forgot about his hateboner for adoption.

It still doesn't make any goddamn sense to me.

 

[ToroidalBoat]

Please, someone tell me what the hell Connor does with his day.

so he is literally watching movies and whining to people on the internet...all day...every day...

Outings with Grandma Bible take a lot out of the day too.

 

[*Asterisk*]

I have an idea for the great literary minds here at Kiwi Farms. (@Meowthkip, @BOLDYSPICY!, @Smutley, etc.) Since Connor Bible sold us out, I was thinking you guys should take Redesigning Eva away from him and make it your own. Fix all the plot holes, inconsistencies, grammatical and spelling errors, and remove any filler. (which would be basically everything) This is your chance to not only outdo Connor Bible at what he claims he's good at, but to get sweet revenge on him for betraying all of you.

I'm offended.

Nobody's a better writer on the Kiwi Farms than me!

 

[Coster]

I'm offended.

Nobody's a better writer on the Kiwi Farms than me!

@Mauvman Shuffleboard