Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[An automatic clown]

That cookbook is the one of the funniest things I've seen in a minute. I really only know of Jack because the broke dick YouTube algorithm kept recommending me that duck faggots videos about him and his kitchen abominations

 

[beautiful person]

I keep watching the modern Jack videos on 1.25 speed and then forgetting that I have them on 1.25 speed, so I haven't been noticing just how fucked up Jack sounds these days.

Also, as an aside, if you can find legitimate Szechuanese food, it's definitely worth trying. One of my favorite cuisines. Not the hyper-Americanized crap that Jack finds in Tennessee or wherever tf he is, though.

 

[AnOminous]

Ole Jack ain't got long left, might as well let him enjoy himself sort of thing.

Or even "why won't this fat bastard stroke out already so I can let Jim Trainor move in? Four's the charm!"

 

[Harambe]

I've been wondering about this, at this point is Jacking Off Ten Guys being driven more by Jack or Hammy? On one hand, I can see Jack being a petulant bitch and whining until mommy wife caves and takes him to another strip mall joint. On the other hand (which Jack doesn't have), I can see Hammy doing these trips as a sort of send off treatment. Ole Jack ain't got long left, might as well let him enjoy himself sort of thing.

Not that it really matters, but these are the kind of thoughts occupying my brain when I'm laying in bed but not tired enough to sleep yet.

Also, consider that Jack is often in the habit of preparing food specifically so that Tammy can't eat it. This may just be a defense mechanism, you have a much lower chance of contracting a deadly food borne illness if you eat literally anywhere Jack isn't cooking.

 

[Zirnwyb]

That blueberry muffin recipe with 32 cups of flour reminds me of a cookbook I have called American Cookery because of some of the cakes having crazy measurements. They're obviously meant to make many cakes to feed many people, though, unlike Jack's "recipe" thats meant to feed just him.

 

[TestTubePuppy]

I can tell from a million miles away that that food comes out of a huge pot on a steam table. Looks like Panda Express.

 

[p1138]

So the two people got...

Orange Chicken, Beef Shejewan, some pork meatball thing dipped in sweet and sour sauce, fried rice because they couldn't just get some plain rice(can see the egg in it), egg rolls, a massive plate of some deep fried turds... Seriously, that was enough food for four, and we still didn't see the entire table. And you know damn well Fatty had to get his fortune cookie or he'd get angy.

"I had a huge coughing attack, how embarassing" Yeah fatty, I'm sure that's due to the beef shejewan having some spice in it and not the fact that it sounds like your lungs are full of fluid that you're too fat to be able to cough up.

 

[Jibbers Cribbers]

What a fat ugly lazy xpress.

 

[Rabid Weasels]

I've been wondering about this, at this point is Jacking Off Ten Guys being driven more by Jack or Hammy? On one hand, I can see Jack being a petulant bitch and whining until mommy wife caves and takes him to another strip mall joint. On the other hand (which Jack doesn't have), I can see Hammy doing these trips as a sort of send off treatment. Ole Jack ain't got long left, might as well let him enjoy himself sort of thing.

Not that it really matters, but these are the kind of thoughts occupying my brain when I'm laying in bed but not tired enough to sleep yet.

i think its being driven almost entirely by jack. My theory is the cookbook was done mainly to prove to Tammy that he does in fact have an actual career in The Food Industry and therefore it is necessary to continue cooking slop and eating mountains of garbage at every iteration of panda express.

 

[RVNX]

My favorite part about CWJ's cookbook are the instructions on how to make money on YouTube conveniently being provided as well. A two-in-one deal if you will!

 

[DontEatThat_2.0]

I've been wondering about this, at this point is Jacking Off Ten Guys being driven more by Jack or Hammy?

Its 100% Jack all the time.

Even from the beginning Jack has made this more of his child than his actual children and its his pride and joy. In reality its his vanity project being funded by his wife so he can larp as a chef and continue to eat like shit in the name of content. He may tell everyone he is going to eat at every strip mall joint to let you in on the secrets of what to order and look out for, but really its him just trying to get some cheap and fast grease, meat, HFSC into his mouth.

Its kind of comical and unexpected at this point most of us thought Jack was going to kick the bucket and then we found out he lived through another fucking stroke. His time in the hospital and therapy did show people attempting to control his diet, and even Tammy chiming in on how he shouldnt eat some things. However as we all know, has the temperance and rational of a fucking child so when the doctors and staff say diabetic diet, Jack gets angy. Being around Jack like that has to be excrucating.

Its been widely shown how terrible Jack is and is very well apparent that almost anyone who has been around him in some capacity (friends, family and church members) have abandoned any relationship with him. The only person who really seems to be around him is Tammy and with that much time constantly around Jack would certainly turn you into an apathetic enabler. Thats why im sure at this point when Jack gargles and hacks his way through a sentence mumbling around "Gud owange chikn." Tammy just shrugs, grabs the keys and wheels his half dead ass to the closest restaurant so he can plow down 4 plates of food. She sits and just let Jack do his thing probably while thinking, any time now.

 

[lindsayfan]

That blueberry muffin recipe with 32 cups of flour reminds me of a cookbook I have called American Cookery because of some of the cakes having crazy measurements. They're obviously meant to make many cakes to feed many people, though, unlike Jack's "recipe" thats meant to feed just him.
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if you go to yard sales and junk stores in rural areas you can find a lot of cheap local cookbooks published as group projects or fundraisers (by some parish church's Ladies Club, by the long-dead homemaking columnist of a defunct newspaper, etc), and a lot of those are very entertaining reads. not only do you get vintage super-unhealthy recipes, sometimes with racist names, but they're also just interesting documents of time, place and culture.

jack is a different kind of entertaining... he's a culture-less clown, a rotting appendix hanging off the intestines of culinary youtube. he is exactly what every non-american who hates americans imagines when you say "american" -- dumb, loud, generically jesus-y, tacky, obese, dying of preventable health issues, devoid of curiosity and proud of it.

 

[Falcon Sebben]

Again, Orange chicken with sauce from Sysco means everything is "Gud".

But the funniest thing is he literally had to show us how to eat sweet and sour pork with sauce on the side. You have to "dip" it into the fuorescent sugar and vinegar sauce that also comes from Sysco. Like we couldn't figure that out ourselves.

He's just mushbraining it up recently.

 

[ZipDisk]

I do wonder at the sudden Asian tilt to JOTG, shortly before the stroke he went to an indian place, and that's damn near taking the mask off his secret ay-rab heritage.
As to garage sale cookbooks, what is the most racist recipe you've seen?

 

[Tiresome]

I do wonder at the sudden Asian tilt to JOTG, shortly before the stroke he went to an indian place, and that's damn near taking the mask off his secret ay-rab heritage.
As to garage sale cookbooks, what is the most racist recipe you've seen?

I don't know if it's the most, but the late 50s Betty Crocker For Kids cookbook in my mom's extensive library had some prizes.

 

[Hungry Homeless Handjob]

This absolute fucking Chad continues to reach new heights of comedy.

 

[Kermit Jizz]

Rob is such a fucking treat.

 

[ZipDisk]

Rob wars. He forgot to make it spicy so Tammy won't eat it!

 

[AnOminous]

This absolute fucking Chad continues to reach new heights of comedy.

I love that he used the gayest soyface he could find not once but twice. Jack won't even catch on because the stupid gay bastard for some reason thinks that expression looks good and doesn't make him look like he has "STICK COCK HERE" and a down arrow to his mouth tattooed on his forehead.

 

[Freya]

Has nobody ever shooped a cock into his mouth in this thread?