Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[Super Hans v2]

New JOTG: "Best Eats - Restaurant Roulette"

Jack once again tries and fails to explain what Restaurant Roulette is, while blaming us for not understanding. They end up at a restaurant next door to one of the Chinese places he reviewed a little while back. Their food looks straight out of a freezer. The waffles look like Eggos. Jack forgets what day it is, and also can't remember what city he's in even though it's the same city he lives in. A+ because it's cheap and gud.

Damn, Jr's been married three years already? I'm starting to wonder why Jack and Tam aren't grandparents yet.

 

[ZipDisk]

I think it's funny that once again, Jack is the fuckup, and Rob does it right.

Rob clearly explains what he is doing, what source he is using, and has clearly defined rules in addition to the roulette wheel.

Jack gets angry and shits his pants.


Those are straight up eggo waffles, and they're upside down!

Jack's babble became unintelligible when describing the fried baloney sandwich, is he mad? He seems giddy as a schoolgirl!

The video cuts off abruptly.

 

[Hollywood Hulk Hogan]

New JOTG: "Best Eats - Restaurant Roulette"

Jack once again tries and fails to explain what Restaurant Roulette is, while blaming us for not understanding. They end up at a restaurant next door to one of the Chinese places he reviewed a little while back. Their food looks straight out of a freezer. The waffles look like Eggos. Jack forgets what day it is, and also can't remember what city he's in even though it's the same city he lives in. A+ because it's cheap and gud.

Bun looks like a cheap bun you'd get from a supermarket and the patty is tiny.

 

[Agamemnon Busmalis]

Against any female nudity that is. If it was a huge cock he'd be making this face.
View attachment 5235182

"Word around the office is you've got a fat cock"

 

[Gentlebastard]

I think it's funny that once again, Jack is the fuckup, and Rob does it right.

At this point, it's like that old comic, Goofus and Gallant:
"Goofus takes the last apple, Gallant shares his pear"
"Jack orders Tammy to lob a third handful of shreddy cheese at the congealing Alfredo sauce, Rob whisks some parmigiano reggiano into his sauce base just before serving"

 

[ZipDisk]

That was the vibe I was trying to imply. Good catch, bastard.

Fuckup and Do-right.
The difference is, Rob is someone you'd like to hang out with. Gallant is a fuckin NARC.

 

[Doctor of Autism]

With the recent Jack on the Go, Restaurant roulette is just Jack sees a random restaurant and just enters it. It's not really much of a roulette when there aren't really any pre-established options. The same for recipe roulette where Jack just opens a random page on his cookbook to make.

There's not really any difference between this and his normal videos.

 

[AnOminous]

With the recent Jack on the Go, Restaurant roulette is just Jack sees a random restaurant and just enters it.

Except whenever Jack spins the chamber and pulls the trigger, there's a chance this is the lard bullet with his final stroke.

 

[ZipDisk]

It is amusing that Rob honors the "roulette" portion of things, and Jack is like "I will select a recipe in a book and pretend it is random".

 

[AltisticRight]

Lab-grown meat would be cool if you got to make it at home. You'd have a little terrarium with a central feeding tube with a meat-unit growing around it, and you'd slice off some of the outer layer when you needed meat to cook.

Lab-grown meat is just another stupid scheme to goad idiotic investors into some "greenwashing trend". These hyped up videos never breaks the process down. I'll just dumb it down to the maximum. For the meat to be grown properly, you need these large devices that are heated at a constant 37 degrees Celsius (bioreactor). You need to monitor every step of the procedure because even a tiny bit of contamination will screw up an entire batch. What's worse, you then need to shut down the entire factory to handle the contamination, resulting in weeks if not months of downtime.

Environmentally, it's probably way worse than soulless mass farms. Imagine its scalability. So you made maybe one small batch with these constantly heated devices and strict monitoring. How much emissions will occur once it's scaled up and what's the chance of contamination? Methane dissipates over time, about a decade. Cows are notorious for burping these out. The carbon emissions produced by these large factories will be in the atmosphere for centuries. All the commonly talked about studies fail to account for different types of emissions, they're comparing apples to oranges.

Farmers also live on their farmland. Will these lab workers in sterile environments live in the labs? How are they going to get to the workplace? Oh right, they will be driving.

The only promising aspect is substituting the unhealthy contents of real meat with healthier alternatives while making them taste the same. It's possible but it will never be cheap.

Man who stuffs his gullet with the periodic table of elements on the daily is whinging about some stupid vax.

 

[Doctor of Autism]

It is amusing that Rob honors the "roulette" portion of things, and Jack is like "I will select a recipe in a book and pretend it is random".

Yeah and we all know Jack will never enter a vegan place or make a vegan dish. So he'll pick whatever place has meat and cheese in it.

 

[Tiresome]

I still cannot get over the fact that that restaurant serves Eggo waffles to customers.


That is the most white trash shit from a hospitality business I have ever seen.

 

[Agent Abe Caprine]

Against any female nudity that is. If it was a huge cock he'd be making this face.
View attachment 5235182

Jack of the Gay

 

[Doctor of Autism]

 

[Kosher Salt]

Damn, Jr's been married three years already? I'm starting to wonder why Jack and Tam aren't grandparents yet.

Prolly can't get it up unless he sticks it in her butt and pretends she's an 11 year old boy.

 

[Falcon Sebben]

So somehow Jack can admit that he knew nothing beforehand about the history of Oppenheimer, but 30 seconds later can with great confidence say that the film was really how it happened

You expect a guy like him to know history? The fact he called him "OPEN-heimer" is enough to show he knows nothing about the man or his work.

New JOTG: "Best Eats - Restaurant Roulette"

Jack once again tries and fails to explain what Restaurant Roulette is, while blaming us for not understanding. They end up at a restaurant next door to one of the Chinese places he reviewed a little while back. Their food looks straight out of a freezer. The waffles look like Eggos. Jack forgets what day it is, and also can't remember what city he's in even though it's the same city he lives in. A+ because it's cheap and gud.

Of all the things to order in a restaurant he orders a "fried bologna sandwich". Something that even the most retarded person can make at home. It's like ordering a grilled cheese in a restaurant. That should only be a thing if you're drunk or a child. The whole point of a restaurant is to make things you can't make at home or make in the same way. Fucking a couple slices of Oscar Meyer in a hot pan with some oil or butter and there's your fried bologna.

And of course he needs to heat his borgor like a taco. No bread and veggies for the Wendigo. No. Just meat.

Beyond that, there was nothing special about that place and I'd wager half the stuff on the menu is just straight from Sysco.

Prolly can't get it up unless he sticks it in her butt and pretends she's an 11 year old boy.

An exceptionally chubby 11 year old boy considering how ample she is.

 

[Midnight Cooking]

More of recipe roulette with Rob. He had something to say about bone-in meat.

 

[Tiresome]

Rob, as ever masterful with his vicious subtlety, slams people whining about cloned meat, directs everyone to check out Jack's flesh-ripping underdone ribs video, and namedrops our man Pig Cups once again.

 

[ZipDisk]

Common misconception. Rob calls frozen shredded pork pig cups. He lost his ruby tinted muffin tin.

Oh, he is just going for the throat this time. From the jump he's fucking with Jack. "Eat more healthy vegetables" Display healthy family life. Exercise. Any reference to Jack's crockbook is an insult by default. Kicking the fact that Jack's sauce sunsetted like a fart.

Jack inadvertently helped make this video!

I wonder if Rob will buy the bluetooth crockpot. One might say that would be overkill for comedy, but Rob actually drove out to meet Scalfatty himself, and managed to do so in a way that was neither autistic or antagonistic, preserving the lol.

Rob points out that Jack uses too much liquid in the crockpot, without directly calling him out.

And once again, in the spirit of Fuckup and Do-right, Fuckup has to tilt his sandwich for instant meaaaaaaat. Do-right eats his sandwich like a regular person.

 

[EatBeforeYouEat]

For a guy who bitches about millennials and zoomers all the time he sure did admit that he knew nothing about OPEN-heimer or the Manhattan Project without any shame. For someone born in the US in the 1960s that is fucking embarrassing IMO.