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Patrick Sean Tomlinson / @stealthygeek / "Torque Wheeler" / @RealAutomanic / Kempesh / Padawan v2.5 - "Conservative" sci-fi author with TDS, armed "drunk with anger management issues" and terminated parental rights, actual tough guy, obese, paid Quasi, paid thousands to be repeatedly unbanned from Twitter
Epic. The dressdown his incompetent lawyer gets is so funny.
Imagine that Megan, the Irish girl operating out of a pawn store, manages to perform so much more competent than this guy.
Pat should have gone with the budget-law-r-us girl from day one instead of this guy with flags and fancy diplomas in the background. His life would suck a lot less right now if he had done so. And he would owe 23000$ less.
He does not need a fancy lawyer, he just needs a tard-wrangler to stop him from doing pig-brained stuff.
- she's attracted to retarded fat man-baby faggots with bitch tits
- a black man (men?) has farted in her vagina
- she's a vulnerable adult in desperate need of conservatorship
- her fetish is pig on human beastiality
- she pegs Patrick
Anyone else also suspect that she was a FAS baby? Her face gives me that impression. It'd go a long way toward explaining why she needs to be more pilled up than Nick Rekeita's wife in order to stay married to Piggy.
So, unless pat makes the monumentally retarded decision of not paying and was only stalling for a single week instead of the month he could have gotten from his pawn shop lawyers, I think things are gonna cool down with him for a bit, until they're all but guaranteed to heat up again with either the second, better debt being domesticated, or the infinitely more entertaining arc of pat actually going against Gibney.
Thank you for the inspiration. You made me consider the question - what if one had to sum up the entirety of Pat's existence in just one sentence?
From miraculous conception on the rat-rod bench seat to middle-aged drunk-driver of the rustang?
From Mama Raven's special boy to Niki Robinson's worst nightmare?
From 2.1 freshman to 1.2 senior?
From humble beginnings in Marquette County to globe-trotting published author?
From meek nerd getting swirlies to political firebrand who will liquidate you?
From lowly renter in a 4-family crack house to esteemed part-owner of a half-hovel?
From skinnyfat to extremely fat?
The answer was right here in front of us all along. Patrick S. Tomlinson is just a clown in search of a rodeo.
So, unless pat makes the monumentally retarded decision of not paying and was only stalling for a single week instead of the month he could have gotten from his pawn shop lawyers, I think things are gonna cool down with him for a bit, until they're all but guaranteed to heat up again with either the second, better debt being domesticated, or the infinitely more entertaining arc of pat actually going against Gibney.
They probably will in the end, but pat was clearly incensed at someone STEALING his precious martyrdom. He'll probably start up his antics again once the process begins in earnest.
It’s called being Irish. She looks exactly like millions of other Irish and Irish-American women on the planet. There are a few standard facial compositions they have and this is one of them.
It’s called being Irish. She looks exactly like millions of other Irish and Irish-American women on the planet. There are a few standard facial compositions they have and this is one of them.
I don't think she has Fetal Alcohol Syndrome, and her maiden name being Robinson points to English ancestry.
However, that still leaves a litany of other mental defects and deficiencies that she objectively has in order to be married to the fat grease factory known as Patrick Tomlinson.
Two enormously obese man-children complaining about how much their feet hurt while they LARP in a foreign warzone would be hilarious. You just know the whole thing would end in gay sex and mutual animosity.
So, unless pat makes the monumentally retarded decision of not paying and was only stalling for a single week instead of the month he could have gotten from his pawn shop lawyers, I think things are gonna cool down with him for a bit, until they're all but guaranteed to heat up again with either the second, better debt being domesticated, or the infinitely more entertaining arc of pat actually going against Gibney.
I just don't know where he will get the money from. I imagine that it's coming from Nikki's mom, but I can't imagine how embarrassing it would be to grovel to your mother-in-law as a 40 year old man.
I just don't know where he will get the money from. I imagine that it's coming from Nikki's mom, but I can't imagine how embarrassing it would be to grovel to your mother-in-law as a 40 year old man.
Oh, my bad. I thought @Dean Pentel was referring to Pat’s lawyer Megan McCabe looking as if she has FAS. That’s who I meant just looks super Irish, not Niki.
I just don't know where he will get the money from. I imagine that it's coming from Nikki's mom, but I can't imagine how embarrassing it would be to grovel to your mother-in-law as a 40 year old man.
I find it hard to imagine he'd get a loan from anyone other than family at this point. Pretty sure "Cash now" type companies wouldn't even help him out.
another update to Patrick's first ever published work The Ark. there's a lot of movement, more here than in any of the past chapters, with a couple of twists and reveals and moments where Patrick actually gets you immersed in his world.
however, i get the feeling some of you knew what chapter was coming up (Chapter 16, to be exact). it gave me pause during review, and that criteria is sufficient to advise anyone even reading the summaries that Patrick's poor grasp of writing and lack of dedicated editing resulted in a distressing case of statutory rape committed by the protagonist. there will be a spoiler within the Chapter 16 segment where it occurs. i don't mean for this to come off like some gay ass trigger warning, but Patrick's affiliations with and white knighting of pedos and the SFWA makes it impossible to ignore that he'd been planting extremely bright red flags about himself as far back as 2013 - his threats towards Adrienne notwithstanding.
i say 2013, but it may be further back. Patrick himself states that The Ark was being written over the course of several years, and it was published in 2015. there's a self-review he posted on Goodreads for his book Gate Crashers (published 2018|) suggesting he started writing seriously as far back as 2009. if there's some demented Pat Lore Specialist™ who wants to match timelines and determine when he really started going off the deep end, hope that helps.
once more, we dive in.
Chapter 1 | Tor Link | Page 2014
Chapter 2 & 3 | Tor Link | Page 2018
Chapter 4 | Tor Link | Page 2033
Chapter 5, 6, 7 | Tor Link | Page 2046
Chapter 8 | Tor Link | Page 2051
Chapter 9-13 | Tor Link | Page 2079
Chapter 14 | Tor Link | Page 2110
==Characters Introduced in Order of Appearance; Character Status==
Bryan Benson,
A police(?) detective and our leading man, a gigasaurus who loves sports and evading responsibility, possibly taxation too.
Chao Feng,
The First Officer (of what?), and a douchedrinker according to Benson. Inherited stolen artwork from his criminal dad.
Lau,
The captain of Patrick's favorite Chinese sports team.
Edmond Laraby,
The missing geneticist whom the plot revolved around, found dead and dumped in space.
Avelina Pereira da Silva,
Science Director; Head of Environmental Research & Development. Got her full name in Chapter 3. Is probably the mastermind of the conspiracy.
Vasquez,
Not to be confused with Vasquez from Aliens; a player in Patrick's favorite sports game.
Lindqvist,
A sports player not even worthy of description by Patrick. Must be a PCJ caricature.
Theresa Alexopolous,
A lieutenant, and a Duty Officer (of what?), sidekick to the Chad Bryan Benson.
Vikram Bahadur,
Chief Constable of the Chinatown District, on par with Bryan Benson. Definitely not a Sikh.
Nibiru,
Not a character, but a black hole on the edge of a solar system. Probably the best character, though, if it's anything like Black Hole Sun.
Devorah Feynman,
Curator of the Museum, wants to preserve humanity's culture by locating and securing authentic works of art. Possibly a facsimile of Patrick's mother.
Constable Pavel Korolev,
Theresa sent him to back-up Benson; a rookie that's greener than grass. A true comrade.
Chef Takahashi,
Probably Japanese. Probably a chef.
Magistrate Boswell,
Probably king of the douchedrinkers.
Salvador 'Sal' Kite
Old guy with "war stories"; criminal scum who paid the court a fine and/or served his sentence for participating in a massive art heist.
Old Benny
Criminal scum who has violated the law.
Director Hekekia,
Engineering genius or something. Big Samoan guy who speaks better than Benson.
Dr. Jeanine Russell,
Medbay staffer on the Ark. Dreams about touching Benson's athletic body.
Captain Mahama,
Maybe the Captain of the Ark's crew. Strong old African womanboss.
Sahni,
Another nondescript *Zero Finals* player lol. Still noting her just in case they become relevant.
Madison Atwood,
Bryan Benson's PE Teacher; works as a constable in Chinatown. Didn't make an appearance when Chao Feng was arrested for some reason.
Magistrate Jindal,
A judge that appears to have a perverse desire to do his job properly.
Duty Officer Hernandez,
Another constable belonging to Benson's cadre. Raised concerns about Benson being a nepotist.
Celine DiMaggio,
An art thief. Has Alzheimer's in the future where such diseases should have been wiped out.
Lefty, or Huang
A Japanese(?) man living underground and off the radar.
Mei,
One of the vagrant *Unbound*.
Agong, or David Kimura
Elder of the Japanese vagrants living off the radar on the Ark. Name means 'Grandfather' in Mandarin; was thought to have died of a heart attack after joining the Ark's council.
Mao,
Leader of a splinter group of *the Unbound*. The new lead suspect in the murder investigation.
--E1: Numbah 15 kicks off with Benson and Theresa yet again shagging in the late Laraby's apartment, which has somehow not been repossessed.
I'm not sure if it's supposed to be funny, maybe even gallows humor of a sort - this setting isn't nearly miserable enough for gallows humor either, but since we don't know a single personable thing about Laraby other than that he was a young and intelligent doctor given the opportunity of a lifetime, it's plain dirty, to me, that our otherwise innocent victim once full of potential continues to be damned and disrespected in his passing.
While I was rambling there, our protagonists mashed naughty bits in his bed for two rounds this time! Awesome.
The first two pages are a stream of dialogue in the form of pillow talk. I'm glazing over the sweet, romantic nothings to focus on the occasional plot drop: Theresa asks Benson what his next move and he agrees with Bahadur that he needs to figure out who attacked him, which is convenient as ever because we have no other prominent leads in the murder itself.
I'm capturing the full page for posterity and because I have a lot of little things to say about this.
In my readview of The Ark I have a tendency to ask questions that I immediately get some kind of an answer to reading a few sentences further. In this case, the reason the house wasn't reassigned is because it, too, is *off the grid*. I whinged before about the technical aspects of this setting being absolute until they aren't, and I stand by it: there's never a good fucking reason for the sudden fallibility of mechanisms which imitate or otherwise operate via divine providence.
The lovers go around in circles padded by pillow talk. None of this strikes me as relevant or critical. It's fine to have relationship moments in a book and for the plot to take an occasional rest, I'm all for that! But Benson and Theresa have not earned this, nor has Patrick.
Once your eyes survive the whimsical gauntlet of thises-and-thats, Benson muses about the blocking of *Plant* signals, and as usual, Theresa's purpose in this plot is to whisper her man a tidbit of sage insight that changes everything. This time, the lieutenant's penny-for-his-thoughts is that Benson shouldn't assume everyone has a signal to block, implying not everyone on the Ark has a *Plant* to begin with.
Sigh.
--E2: It was bound to happen but here we are. In a transient, migratory society where humanity is born and bred in tanks and everyone gets Neuralink implants, undoubtedly there'd be some who slip the net and have traditional births and live truly off the radar. I'm spoiling the reveal on the next half of the chapter, but this trope can be spotted a mile away.
Benson mind-phones up Dr. Jeanine Russell and queries her about people who wouldn't have *Plants* and why. She lays down some MAJOR worldbuilding details that would've been really nice to have earlier: **Plants are installed in a human before they're even 'born' technically: the second trimester, and they fuse with the tissue of the frontal cortex.** They CAN'T be removed. The only way to not have one is to be born naturally, which brings us too...
...Some more beans being spilled. Highlighted in red are major issues, but I've already built a heap of plot holes and contradictions in this story as it is. All the way back in Chapter 4, I think, I asked a lot of pointed questions about people having traditional births on the Ark. That specter rises again on this page.
I suppose the most obvious question is: why would you expect, or rather, *TRUST ANYONE* to take birth control when you can apply genetic modifications? Why not alter DNA in the birthing tanks? You could sterilize people and lift it later as needed. *Say you're in charge of maintaining humanity on its lonely voyage through the stars: why the fuck would you allow this to become a problem in the first place?* Traditional births could have been nipped in the bud from the moment you started growing new babies. Abortions should not even be relevant because you should not even need to to mandate birth control in the first place. We are in a setting where the science being applied can make game of everyone's bodies and instincts. If a narrative is a sail, then this is a hole in the plot so big that it reduces the entire cloth to tatters floating away on the seabreeze.
In my last update, someone pointed out I missed a detail about the paintings in Feng's suite, that they were somehow taken off the database which eluded Devorah's algorithms. If I've missed something here again, then I may be getting more affected by Patrick's quality wordsmithing than I thought, but holy shit you can't make this up. Nobody can just intentionally set out to create a book full of this many problems.
All of that tangent was focused on one line of dialogue from Jeanine. We haven't even gotten to the second half of the relevant pic, which is that the sheer number of complexities in a pregnancy will set off a myriad of Life Alerts™ that warn the Ark's doctors of an abnormal medical event. Jeanine simply leaves us off by saying it's "not impossible" to get pregnant *off the fucking grid* and bring a baby to term without being discovered.
This is madness.
Before hanging up, Benson reminds Jeanine that he wants her to check for signs of a struggle, defensive wounds, all over again: padding and the usual bullshit, and some tactless flirting. At least we'll be finding out something before the dead fucker thaws, I guess. Gotta love the random lesbian hinting in there, too. Patrick, why.
--E3: Following a break, Benson is looking up Salvador Kite.
Once again, a single paragraph inflames crippling autism, and in one of the worst ways. The functions of the Ark's *Plants* is dramatically inconsistent, as I have thoroughly established, and I can't FUCKING stand it on a fundamental level. I can't stop thinking about it, I can't stop bitching about it. I am much more offended by the mention of *Plants* than I am by *Zero Finals* now. That isn't all, though: Benson apparently has an "old supervisor", who does not get a name, who informs him that Mr. Sal Kite is now working for Devorah at the Museum by at her own request.
To be clear, it pisses me off that we learn about Benson having what sounds like an old mentor or leader, and the motherfucker doesn't even get a NAME when a bunch of *Zero Finals* players get names!?! Piss off, Patrick. That was a chance to introduce some more chemistry in our cast and you squandered it, as well as a prime opportunity to reflect Bryan Benson's career in the constabulary through a senior figure.
Jesus Christ. There's been meandering and then there's been this, but oh wait, it gets worse once you glance over the bizarre passage about kids looking at a statue's penis. I'm not a prude; it's one thing to have kids simply giggle at the depiction of genitalia on a statue, but did we really need Benson's assertion *that little boys were comparing themselves to it* ????? Why was this written?
There were right ways and wrong ways to write this and Patrick chose the most wrong.
Thankfully, Devorah muscles into the scene to confirm what Captain Mahama suggested in Chapter 14: that the rest of the missing artifacts from the Heist have been anonymously returned. I fucking hate this, I fucking hate that she was right about it, and I fucking hate that this is getting glossed over.
I fucking hate it, because Chao Feng wasn't necessarily being held in connection to the murder case. His culpability in a connected crime that is as equally severe warranted him being kept on ice. In my eyes, Benson's break in the case was senselessly thrown out. Now the Heist is neatly wrapped up and we're just going to stop caring about what was the second most interesting part of the plot so far and an important subplot/backbone to the cloudy murder mystery.
--E4: To Patrick's credit, I continue to appreciate Devorah, but I constantly ask why her name is Devorah and not simply Deborah. Either way, she is the best character (and most developed actual character) in the story with the most salient things to say. I fear that her relevance will diminish overall now that her connection to the plot through the Heist is gone, however.
Benson presses Salvador for information based on Theresa's insight: here is the reveal that there are indeed some folks living off the Ark's radar. A small community living in the guts of the Ark beneath the habitation modules called **Geisha**, or *the Unbound*. Oh here we go...
They call themselves the *Geisha* not because they're all women, but because the, and I quote, "young girls", often trade their bodies for amenities. I don't rightly care about the Ark's Conservation Codes or prostitution at this point because I'm braced for maximum cringe. Also, it's fitting for Patrick that the Chinese representation in this story is very positive and all-encompassing while the Japanese representation is limited to one restaurant and vagrant harlots living in the sci-fi equivalent to a fucking sewer system.
Benson asks Sal to set up a meeting but that's not gonna happen, so we get a little background to the Ark's Sublevels and the infrastructure contained therein. Long story short: it's a vast network of plumbing, electrical conduits, atmospherics, insulation and radiation shielding; nobody goes down there, and it's all running on duct tape and wishes after 200 years of interstellar transit. The cherry on top is that if anything down there fails, there's no fixing it.
The only advice Sal has for Benson is that he has to hope one of the *Geisha* take an interest in him: there are no introductions. Very spooky! If there's a single unflattering reference to the Bentusi from Homeworld in this story, I'll buy a physical copy of this book and light it on fire.
--E5: I like what I'm reading so far. It's ridiculously hard for anyone to screw up exploration into the unknown, and this feels much more natural than the inconceivably retarded EVA Pod disaster. Not only is Benson out of his league in the Sublevels, it feels proper because he has no choice but to brave them alone if he wants the truth. Tau Ceti G is less than a week away if I recall correctly, and if I give Patrick a chance, the stakes feel strong in the forebrain here - it's a VERY solid opener and despite everything up to this chapter, I can still engage with these occasional good moments.
That said I'm not sure why Benson needs a Goddamned medieval torch for this when a flashlight would suffice, and the comment about dried blood disrupts the tone. Patrick stumbled into writing a fantasy CYOA instead of focusing on the industrial erosion. To be fair to Patrick though, I'm nitpicking. This is trivial shit that a halfway decent editor would have helped iron out of the final work.
The second page keeps that strong lead going. I don't consider this to be padding. Quite the opposite. For me, it's enjoyable and immersive.
Since starting the readview (and before) I noticed a few posters remarking that this kind of story has potential and is worth writing. I agree completely with that sentiment. I haven't responded to it until now, but they're absolutely right. A murder mystery on a generation ship? Fuck yeah, man. Go wild. This right here is what we needed more of: suspense, intrigue, the main character stepping out of his comfort zone and doing SOMETHING that we can sympathize with.
And in this second capture, the last paragraph is worth a nod: Benson thinking sourly about the bullshit Mahama spouted? Fuck yeah, man. For once, I'm right there with the main character. There's even more that I could say about this but I'll leave it with another 'Good job, Pat.'
--E6: More decent, immersive writing follows: Benson realizes he's been found and decides to sit tight and wait for the *Geisha* to come to him, laying out his goodwill offerings in the meantime. Most of the page is devoted to his musings and thoughts comparing and contrasting life in the Ark's habitats to the lives that the *Unbound* must be living, and I'm into it. There's one bit of awkward grammar and some mostly harmless meandering, but I'm still enjoying it.
It's funny. There's actually not a whole lot happening but it's enjoyable so I don't really care. This is so refreshing after endless *Zero Finals* references and the fucking "literally nothing happens" chapters which were notable for being lame as Hell to read.
In due course, the Unbound approach and make themselves known.
||Entry 7 contains a scene of explicit, unquestionable statutory rape. In my opinion, this is all handled badly and leaves a foul taste in the mouth.
--E7: Or so it appeared. Rather than a group, Benson discovers one of the vagrant *Geisha* right behind him: a flexible girl described as "so young", and my eyebrow raises the further I read into the following paragraphs. From Benson's description I judge her to be a minor and dislike the flowery exposition on her appearance. Frankly, it's grossly out of place for the narrator to show this much interest - if you wanted to sleaze it up even harder, having a tertiary character here alongside Benson actually SAYING those things and establishing himself as a total scumbag would have been the smart choice.
This "so young" girl assumes Benson to be another John that's and puts the moves on him. *What follows is uncomfortable, no question about it.*
After mulling over Patrick's handling of this - and not forgetting that he's on notice for how he regards women in life and portrays them in fiction - I say he handled this badly, but not in the absolute worst possible way.
Whilst Benson sucks as a character and he has no personality, THIS IRRESPONSIBILITY IS UNCONSCIONABLE. No ordinary man gets spellbound by a minor, and Salvador made it crystal clear that the *Geisha* were bartering sex for goods. Bryan knew exactly what he needed and still failed to demonstrate integrity and maturity. The poor girl should never have made it past the crawling on her hands and knees before Benson vehemently stopped her: everything I highlighted in Red should have been cut at a minimum. We as the reader already have a dire understanding of *the Unbound*, that their instincts for self-preservation are so desperate and mindless that [sexual] child abuse is one of the many terrifying justifications for their survival -- we did not need the explicit scene of statutory rape to clarify that.
When I was younger, I watched a lot of Law & Order on TV. Special Victims Unit was the most common and I loved that one the most because Detective Olivia Benson and Detective Elliot Stabler were an incredibly effective duo amongst a star-studded cast. They were adhered by an awesome synergy, which was itself augmented by their many incompatibilites. Olivia was idealistic and optimistic, feminine and nurturing: she always sought justice for victims without violence or bending the law. Stabler was a devout Catholic who, many times, gave into anger and abused his position to lay the hurt on offenders to get his way, especially anyone who harmed minors. Patrick's self-insert in Bryan has none of these qualities: he allowed himself to be seduced and, as usual, glosses over his own absentmindedness with despicable, horrifying abandon.
If it were any other author I could probably let it go, and maybe a reprint would have amended this scene to be less disturbing. Another author might have learned a valuable lesson. Not Patrick, though. Knowing what I know of him (which is too much) and his palling around with the pedo-ridden SFWA much later after this book, this is a red flag I will not ignore and will not forget.
The discomfort continues with one too many out-of-touch and out-of-place gestures that are colored darkly by what I've read immediately beforehand. Suffice it to say that Benson is making contact with *the Unbound*, and that I really, REALLY don't like the caveman Engrish that this girl's speaking. That right there is the capstone to this entire shitshow.
--E8: Back on track, the lead man in the skinny, malnourished group comforts the girl with a hug - probably her father if not simply related, and you better believe I want this guy necked as soon as colonization gets underway. They tell Benson to fuck off if he's not buying and Benson protests, saying he's here to trade. Then they reveal that they know who Benson-san is.
Maybe it's just me, but I dislike the use of honorifics in English, at least in fiction. Anyone ever play Mass Effect? Remember Noveria and the faux-Japanese shit the head of Security and her guards were doing, adding -sama and -san to people's names? It's cringe, and I hate it. I'm not faulting Patrick too hard for it, it's just my own pet peeve.
Benson requests a meeting with the elders down here, and comes up with a name for this 'leader': *Lefty*. Alright, sure. Ahh, oh, and more CCP-humping comes into play with Benson randomly dropping another fact about himself: He speaks passable Mandarin! And the language that the *Geisha* are speaking must be Japanese! God, it's like we're back on Chapter 1 again.
Our new friend, Lefty, caves to Benson's threats of returning with backup and complies. The geisha girl approaches Benson and tells him to wait here as he hands over his barter. The waiting game commences, with Benson challenging the three guys sticking around with him to a game of cards.
--E9: In lieu of a deeply conflicted internal monologue about what he let happen in the previous chapter, Benson instead befriends the local mooks through a series of games. I'm disconnected from this because I can't stand the caveman Engrish. Also, having been to Japan myself and interacted extensively with quite a few Japanese online, I'm gonna say right now: none of them talk like this, not even those individuals the least fluent in English.
Thankfully, Dr. Jeanine Russell swings into the scene via *Plant* call with a much-needed update on the murder of Laraby. Right away, she confirms Benson's suspicions: signs of an attack are present, with bruising along the arm and other signs of a struggle. Even better, there are skin cells and traces of drid blood under Laraby's fingernails!
Jeanine then raises her death flag. That is to say, she tells us she ran a DNA match and knows who Laraby nicked in his final moments, but Benson urges her not to say it over open, monitored *Plant* comms. So, I'm guessing she's going to fucking die or something insanely contrived will happen to keep Laraby's attacker concealed. Benson orders her to go through a number of steps and that he'll meet her in person to get that name for himself.
Right at the end, Benson is told by the girl a certain *Agong* will meet him.
--E10: The girl, whose name is revealed to be *Mei*, leads Benson through the Sublevels to a meeting with Agong. He tries to chat her up but she smartly rebukes him.
What passes for *the Unbound*'s settlement is offensive to most of Benson's senses, but that's before he catches a whiff of the organic produce they are tending: real mushrooms, and quite the assortment. Bryan then exposits for our benefit - this place is what we already thought it to be: a refugee camp, no different from the kind back on Earth. That's not very helpful because we have never had any indication of what life was like on Earth leading up to the Ark's launch. I'm not aware they were suffering famine, poverty, and aggressive climate change.
Whatever. Mei guides him towards a chapel-like building, curiously decorated by human skulls.
Moving through the ramshackle interior, there's more world-building that, while I think it's ok, I still find myself skimming over. Something about it rubs me the wrong way, but I won't dwell on it. Lefty's here (real name *Huang*), and the man named Agong... who turns out to be none other than *David Kimura*.
Now I'm engaged again! I chose not to add David Kimura to the characters list before because he was instantly declared to be dead, but here he is, in the flesh, apparently having not suffered a heart attack to get him out of office. Benson is at a loss for words, but as they get formally introduced, we come to the matter of the murder investigation. Kimura dismisses the entourage and prompts Benson about bonsai, ruining the moment with a redux of the same crap Mahama pulled tens of thousands of words back. At least Benson is complaining about the tree metaphors too, so I don't feel crazy in a vacuum.
Meandering again, failing to get to the point... the usual. A few sentences before this, you'll note, Benson is glad that he won't have to report kissing a little girl, and now he has the gall to admonish Kimura for prostituting them. Even worse, Kimura deflects and says that they "volunteer" for it. I'm not touching that one, not even with a snake catcher's pole. I hate everyone in this scene and am now pissed off.
--E11: We're still four pages from the end of this Chapter, but it's fucking over already. Fuck *Zero Finals*. A team of *Zero Finals* hooligans killed my cat and I want them all to bleed out.
Here's the rundown: another girl who is not Mei fixed the tablet that Benson broke and bartered with, and also changed the password on it, and also doodled funny drawings on a picture of Benson. Everyone does a big shrug about this. More distraction, with Benson flabbergasted that Kimura's daughter, among other children, are all being forced to live down hear outside of society. But at least he's smart enough to notice they've been getting off-track for so long.
Benson tries to bring up Laraby's profile from the ship records, but it doesn't work. Wireless doesn't work in the sublevels as *the Geisha* have constructed themselves what amounts to a Faraday cage, preventing signals from getting in or out of their home. This incldues the signals sent by the *Plants*, and that also explains how Kimura's fake death became the defining story about him.
There's also a line here about a "sympathetic reclamation tech who recyled his *body*". Let's see how long it takes for that one to get fucking explained.
--E12: Some meandering, and finally we're back on the case. Benson grills Kimura about the key players in the investigation: David says he does not know and has never seen Edmond Laraby before, but he does know Chao Feng through Chao's father. Chao Feng also never visited *the Unbound*. Benson elaborates further that although Feng has an alibi for the murder, someone who couldn't be tracked put Laraby in that airlock and spaced him.
When Kimura asks why it couldn't be suicide, Benson reveals his wounds. The detective's implication is obvious: whoever murdered Laraby and tried for his own life must be one of *the Unbound*. Benson wants to interview the men, but Kimura says it won't happen. He speaks for his people and assures Benson that they had nothing to do with it.
Bryan then switches gears, asking about Kimura's people under Avalon.
Well, that's a problem. They're not his people. Kimura explains that a schism occurred two years ago, and a handful of Kimura's people broke off under the leadership of one *Mao* (oh God). It was initially peaceful, but Mao became more paranoid and aggressive, exacerbated by their difference in opinion.
--E13: Benson is again flabbergasted, this time by the revelation of a "revolutionary terrorist cell" growing in the Ark's underbelly. Seems a bit premature to jump to "terror cell" right now but he's the detective I guess. Kimura affirms it all the same, but cautions Benson that he does not know Mao's intentions, and should expect only hostility if he pursues them. Benson asks where he might find their camp, but Kimura has nothing to offer: Mao's cohorts number less than ten, perfect for stirring up trouble anywhere and everywhere before vanishing.
As the conversation wraps up, Benson asks Kimura what this information will cost him. Kimura, however, won't haggle, but instead bargains with the chief constable. Kimura and his people will continue supplying information to Benson in exchange for Clemency and Sanctuary. Kimura is essentially making a plea deal for the sake of his people, as once *the Flip* occurs their freedom and safety will be jeopardized. Bryan cottons on that these people won't survive the hard deceleration down here, but isn't swayed...
Fucking Hell, man. The whole prostitution angle wasn't bad enough, but Kimura tosses one last brick at us: Mei, the minor they are prostituting, is pregnant. First child abuse, then statutory rape, and NOW teen pregnancy. That's it. I need a break.
The chapter MERCIFULLY ends shortly after this reveal. Before Benson leaves, he asks about the skulls laid out in front of the domicile. Kimura replies that they are how his people count their fallen down here as *the Clock* on the surface counts the Ark's deceased.
This set of chapters started off bad and slow, with some lousy pillow talk between Benson and Theresa, who are still fucking Laraby's fucking bed, that culminates in Theresa dropping another useful hint when our protagonist needs it most: "focus on who attacked you." Now that he's been reminded of the attempt on his life, Benson calls up Dr. Jeanine Russell and asks about anyone on the Ark who doesn't have a *Plant*. Jeanine informs us that because all of the Ark's law-abiding populace are born in tanks, they are given a *Plant* by their second trimester, which fuses with the brain and literally cannot be removed. She opens more plot holes and contradictions in the setting by pointing out that birth control isn't as mandatory or effective as it ought to be, and that having children and being pregnant *off the grid* is not impossible.
On the second half of Chapter 15, Benson looks up Salvador Kite and learns about a group of people living in the Ark's sublevels (the sewers, basically) beneath the Habitation modules, called *the Geisha*, or *the Unbound*. They're vagrants who steal what they can and trade sex for goods and amenities when needed - so, they're prostitutes, and children also participate in the latter.
And no, Patrick. You fucking clown. Children can't consent to anything, so they can't volunteer for this. You lunatic.
Chapter 16 starts of the strongest of everything I've read in this book so far, with an exploration into the unknown. Benson's totally out of his league and for a while, I'm immersed. Unfortunately, Patrick ruins everything by allowing his (obviously self-insert) protagonist to be seduced by a minor who assumes he's down there to fornicate with children. Whether or not you read this scene in detail, I think the aftermath is far more distressing in that Benson suffers no conflict over it whatsoever other than that he was worried about the consequences. This isn't a joke. Nevertheless, he arranges a meeting with the under-dweller's leader and plays some games with their goons in the meantime.
Chapter 17 is another of the Ark's usual affairs: a rollercoaster of inconsistencies and uncontrolled pacing. We meet a man named Agong, who is actually David Kimura, a man thought to be dead after a supposed heart attack decades ago - a heart attack that was thought to have been foul play to prevent an idealist like him from upsetting the Ark's status quo. Kimura is more helpful than anyone Benson's interrogated so far: while he doesn't know Laraby or much about Chao Feng, he tells Benson of a splinter group run by a man named *Mao*, who were once his people, who separated after a critical difference of opinion.
In exchange for providing all possible intel to Benson during this investigation, Kimura bargains clemency and sanctuary for his people once *the Flip* occurs, which will certainly kill them if they aren't able to go to the surface. The child prostitute that Benson got way too close to turns out to also be two-months pregnant (rate this post Horrifying, thanks in advance), which ultimately sways his opinion on what is otherwise a very big ask.
With all said and done, we are no closer to discovering a motive for Laraby's murder or who dunnit, but we have yet another name to follow, and they're the kind of bastards who fit the bill: revolutionaries living off the grid, able to avoid detection by the Ark's systems. The perfect trigger pullers for whomever Patrick's criminal mastermind is.
