Community Munchausen's by Internet (Malingerers, Munchies, Spoonies, etc) - Feigning Illnesses for Attention

[Carnavoyeur]

The idea of an anxiety horse is killing me. I love the buggers but they're basically couches with anxiety!

Lol seriously. The horse is going to need its own anxiety support animal.

 

[Slippin Kimmy]

As someone who loves and owns horses, the service horse munchie pisses me off the most. Horses are not clean animals. They shit and piss in their own water buckets and hay when given the chance.

Miniatures require just as much care as a regular sized horse and the way she has everything bedded is making me mad on the internet.

Yes, minis can make good THERAPY animals but definitely not a working service animal. But munchies ARE the most delusional creatures on the planet.

 

[Ginger_beer]

As someone who loves and owns horses, the service horse munchie pisses me off the most. Horses are not clean animals. They shit and piss in their own water buckets and hay when given the chance.

Miniatures require just as much care as a regular sized horse and the way she has everything bedded is making me mad on the internet.

Yes, minis can make good THERAPY animals but definitely not a working service animal. But munchies ARE the most delusional creatures on the planet.

This is obviously such a nice little creature too -- others would have bitten and/or stomped the living daylights out of her for pushing them into so many awful situations. Just look at that sad, under-muscled neck as well. The poor thing obviously doesn't get nearly enough exercise/free running time. I deliberately avoid most of the animal (and child) related things on here because it just makes me MATI to no good purpose, and I see I have to add "horse as a fake service animal" to that list.

 

[Sparkling Yuzu]

it suddenly dawned on me they don’t really lay down like dogs do so it just stands there next to her while she eats. Even if this horse was professionally trained by a service horse program to be the best little service horsie the world had ever seen, it would stand next to the table at eye level with the food, awake, silent, and staring. I was not afraid of horses until I started writing this and now i feel vaguely threatened by them.

I wonder if they beg with big pleading eyes like dogs.

The horse pees in the shavings and then sleeps in the peepee shavings.

Is that what barn horses do?

So apparently going up and down stairs is really difficult for horses because of how their spines are constructed. Everything about this sounds like such a bad idea.

That's terrifying. I don't know how munchies like this live themselves when doing obviously harmful shit.

Why is this big bitch wearing a BDSM collar in public? I do not consent to be part of your fetish

Maybe she thinks it's the same as those spiky goff collars? She doesn't look like the brightest bulb.

The house is covered in hay, horse shit, and shavings all the time.

I'm amazed her room mate allows this.

Isn’t it a profoundly bad idea to give horses people food? Like that is the one thing I know about horses: their digestive systems are retarded and if they get a tummy ache they could die.

Good luck to the poor thing with that fat shewhale as it's neglectful owner.

She has to clean the manure out of her bedroom ("the stall") before she goes to bed to keep the shit odor to a minimum, then clean it again in the morning after the horse shits again overnight. I'm already moderately grossed out by litter boxes but somehow this is so much worse.

I can’t get over the potty situation. My brain will not allow me to rationalize this. How do you even sleep through the smell of horse shit wafting through the air directly next to your head like that? And why are we commanding the horse to shit in the kiddy pool next to the bed instead of taking it outside to shit? I guess just to make sure if she needs to shit in the night she knows that is where she goes but oh, I hate it so much.

my guess is she didn’t understand until the reality was present that a service horse means having a horse eating hay, rolling in shavings, and taking a dooky inside your house so your roommate can pretend she’s special. Did any of us really understand this was the reality?

I can’t get over the filth factor. There’s hay in the bathtub because of the horse and she’s just like, yep, gonna soak myself in this vat of cream of cryptosporidium soup, nbd. Baths were already gross before we added zoonoses into it.

Imagine having a relaxing bath and instead of a clean, warm floor for your bare feet, it's dirty hay for your freshly washed feet to touch.

The further adventures of "this is a bad idea": apparently horses do not have even the body awareness dogs have and their vision is meant more for watching for predators than what's in front of them, so hurt themselves jumping into things.

That horse is a literal saint to put up with this selfish mental case.

The horse has to see a chiropractor.

Horse chiropractors are surprisingly common.

She was finishing her masters in piano performance and preparing to audition for a doctoral program and there was an active shooter/suicide situation on campus while she was recovering from an eating disorder. This new school shooting makes her remember all that, and that is why she gets to bring the horse to walmart.

It reads like an AI put popular phrases together to make a bio but it's what she actually claims.

She’s bisexual and she’s in DANGER because people don’t support her rights. Lol no one cares about bisexuals get over it, go date someone of the opposite sex and have a happy life.

OMG YOU LITERAL BIPHOBE, STOP WISHING PEOPLE A HAPPY LIFE!

You’re not going to die from plantar fasciitis if your horse isn’t there to bear your weight.

What in the actual fattness of this woman.

Am I wrong in my assumption that young healthy horses need a shitload of exercise? and that Flirty is not getting nearly enough?

No way this fat cunt gives it the minimal acceptable daily exercise.

fun fact I just learned about horses, if they don't have something in their stomach at all times they can get ulcers which can quickly turn into a veterinary emergency.

So she's probably feeding it cheetos 24 hours a day.

So in Myranda's timeline on KF she was screeching about this dog named Thistle. Thistle was a teacup poodle and a "seizure alert dog" for Susan Grill's sister. Thistle's job was to be carried all day and stay awake unless she was sung "a proprietary Trained & Maintained lullaby" that let her know it was safe to sleep, otherwise she might miss a seizure alert. She died a pretty slow and shitty death. In Myranda's posts about it she implied that Thistle was taken to the groomer at Petsmart who put her in a grooming noose against the owner's wishes. The noose tightened due to negligence and crushed her trachea, a one-time traumatic event that caused irreparable damage, then petsmart refused to take responsibility or pay for the surgery Thistle needed and so she was euthanized. The real story, as Abrea tells us here, was actually that Thistle had been coughing and it was first noticed shortly after being groomed. She was treated for kennel cough but did not improve. They continued to take her to both the vet and the grooming salon at PetSmart because of course, the dog needed to be dyed hot pink and couldn't just get her hair trimmed at home with scissors or a clipper or something. It wasn’t until later that they discovered tracheal damage. So two things to note here: 1) tracheal collapse is common in toy poodles and other toy breeds. It’s suspected there’s a genetic component and there doesn’t need to be actual trauma to the trachea; sometimes the cartilage rings that hold the trachea open just go all floppy-floppy on them over their lifetime. 2) Susan used prongs to train all her dogs and while Myranda insists they are unable to cause tracheal damage they are, just like any other collar. It would only take one bad tug on a 4 lb poodle’s neck to fuck its shit up, like maybe from someone who is used to working with standard poodles? Anyway, petsmart wouldn’t take responsibility or pay for the surgery because it wasn’t their fault to begin with.

Oh hey you know what could have caused tracheal damage to Thistle? Being carried around in a Baby Bjorn 24/7. Can you imagine if she had a real seizure with this thing on and went down like a sack of hammers? She’d squash the little fucker.

Thistle is dead and they’re trying over with another toy poodle. FTR Thistle was not just euthanised when they found out it was fatal. They flew her to Florida so Susan and her sister could sing her the proprietary Trained & Maintained lullaby that put her to sleep one last time while the vet was sedating her for euthanasia. So this poor dog that couldn't breathe because her windpipe was collapsed got to be an attention seeker's accessory right to the last breath.

Selfish to the last dying breath. People really show their true colors when an animal needs to be put down. Silver lining: at least it wasn't lynched by PetSmart?

she’s embarrassed and now hiding in the shitter. Security waits outside the door for her and kicks her out anyway so she calls the police. Lmao. 'Police? Yes I'd like to report that the mean Paul Blart man at the mall said my pony isn't a real service animal!"

Paul Blart: Spoonie Cop

Flirty is supposed to wake Abrea up from night terrors? Jfc NO. People in a terror should only be woken up if they've hurt themselves, hurt someone else, or are about to do so. Trying to wake them can cause them to lash out violently, even at their most loved ones. Hell, I've only shared a bed with someone only once in the past two decades under extreme duress, because I have a legitimate fear that if I do, I'll wake up in the middle of the night to find myself in the process of strangling my bedmate to death. If Abrea genuinely does have terrors, and Flirty tries wake her at the wrong time, Abrea may do that poor little creature grievous harm.

She's already neglecting the fuck out of it and putting it in potentially dangerous situations like driving with it loose in a car and going up stairs. She wouldn't care if he accidentally killed it in a night terror and would never tell the truth that she caused it if it happened.

 

[JanuaryViolet]

OMG, @Kate Farms Shill -- this is gold. I'm only about 1/3 of the way through it and I'm screaming. serious powerlevel: I'm a lifelong rider. That's a cute little miniature she has there, but holy fuck, she keeps it in the apartment????? I love horses but they need their own houses. Sleeping anywhere near them means you are camping, and keeping one in a FUCKING APARTMENT means they are breaking all kinds of city codes somewhere, even in Bumfuck, Nebraska. This proves the belief I've held for years that Dressage Queens Be Batshit Insane.

There are such things as therapy horses but they are specially trained for people getting physical or mobility therapy to ride on. The minis like this are pretty much pets and curiousities, and are frequently owned by incredibly ignorant people who do not know how to care for them properly (see above, although she must have known, at some point how to care for her actual horse, and realize that this is retarded). I'm going to try to read the rest of it without having an aneurysm.

 

[Kate Farms Shill]

Abrea Hensley and Flirty the Service horse, part 2. In part 1 we learned that Abrea needs a service horse for her very severe disabilities including plantar fasciitis and PTSD she suddenly decided she had at age 30. We also learned that service horses are very, very different from service dogs no matter how many times Abrea claims they're basically the same. Flirty can't be housebroken so she shits and pisses in the house and drags shavings and manure everywhere. Abrea has converted her bedroom into a horse stall and sleeps with her head next to the horse's potty corner. The horse is biologically programmed to be wary of everything and to constantly seek food and every single one of her "tasks" can be chalked up to either being on guard or looking for a snack. We ended when Abrea has just gotten carpal tunnel surgery and is milking it for all it's worth.

Spoiler: when horses fly

Bitch who never shuts up about how many access issues she has and how she just wants to go about her normal life works the horse "naked" in public, admits the small leash wrap is “the only indication that she is a [sic] anything more than a pet.” She says this is because it’s too gosh darned hard to fasten her cape with one hand.


How does a horse keep you alive? No seriously, what does this horse do that can in any way be classified as life-saving?


It stands next to her and nudges her elbow periodically to keep her from dissociating. Yep, that’s its current main task. Another case where the horse hasn't been trained to do shit. It's just nudging her because there's always food around.


She can’t put a vest on the horse because of her surgery, but she can put a coat on her. Explain, Abrea.


Still milking this super easy surgery.


She’s going for fat people diseases now. Sleep study to prove she has apnea so she can get a CPAP. I mean, good that she’s taking it seriously because unlike her painful foot and her anxiety this could actually kill her.


Surgery 2, this one is on her dominant hand and will make it hard for her to drive her own car. Remember that she’s taken the passenger seat out of her vehicle to give Flirty somewhere to stand meaning she has nowhere to sit if the driver seat is occupied because she is too large to fit in the back of her tiny sport coupe. Now she has to figure out a way to get herself and her horse places in someone else’s car because god forbid she leave her anxiety pony at home.


Now that’s that one’s healed, she’s getting a tubal ligation. At least we don’t have to worry about this one spawning and going MBP on her kid.


She got the CPAP she wanted. Yay for eating ourselves to preventable medical conditions that can kill us in our sleep!


Her horse has been ASSAULTED!!!!! Read: kids approached her at the mall and asked if they can pet the pony. She claims she just said no and then had Flirty “brace” so she could stand up because apparently that’s too hard for our ana princess these days. As she waddled away, one of the kids runs up and smacks the horse on the ass. First of all, how much you wanna bet Abrea acted like a real cunt to these kids? But also just another item in the “a horse for anxiety is an incredibly dumb idea” list.


Obese woman who needs a machine to keep her neck-fat from strangling her in her sleep goes to grocery store without her horse and buys a bag of cookies. She has no memory of it! She must have dissociated and panicked and wandered down the cookie aisle on autopilot. If she had Flirty there the horse would have stopped her from dissociating and then she wouldn’t have ended up with these Keebler-brand Samoas.


She gets interviewed by local news about her horse. Nothing says “I have crippling anxiety and am not doing this for attention” like engaging with the journoscum to draw more attention to yourself. Remember that she tells people they're putting her life in danger if they post pictures they snapped of her on the street. She also says one of her psych team said she wouldn't be alive without the horse.


Service horse logistics I never considered: as grazers they are instinctually driven to take a nibble of plants as they walk by and therefore constantly try to browse in people’s lawns, gardens, city planters, and even the fake plants at the craft store and this is nearly impossible to train them not to do. I really can't tell you how much I'm learning about horses while writing this and how much funnier each new fact makes this whole charade.


She keeps and entire rolling cart of junk food next to her work station. She pretends this is all horse snacks and I recognize at least one (the orange bag on the bottom rack is pumpkin-flavored Blue Buffalo Health Bars) but I’m gonna guess the Dr. Pepper, chocolate cordial cherries, and Ghiradelli chocolate squares are not for the horse but the buffalo. This is just reinforcing my belief that every “task” or “alert” Flirty performs is just pestering Abrea for treats.


Service horse logistics I never considered: she has to train it and even coax it into new places with a whip just like any other horse. This is not the usual way the horse gets its “zoomies” out because normally this area is as hoarded out and cluttered as the rest of the house. She’s just taking advantage of the homeowner renovating the area.

Flirty is hurty and now one of her legs locks up and gets stuck. Abrea keeps working her anyway and insists this is not a big deal, it doesn’t hurt, it happens all the time and will heal on its own. Okay I know nothing about this, if it's painful or scary or dangerous for the animal. I just know as non horse people if I saw someone working a horse - any animal - in this state, I would be calling the relevant authorities to report you for abuse. What the fuck task could this animal conceivably perform when she can’t even fucking walk? I really don't care if exercise is the solution to fixing this. You can take her for a nice little horsie walk in a field.

Abrea didn’t like that people pushed back on that so she goes to the ER for bad tummy cramps. All tests normal. Couldn’t be the junk food diet we’ve watched her eat for five years now.


What is your legitimate medical need for bringing your horse to the grocery store? You might accidentally buy cookies? Your foot might hurt real bad because you decided not to lose weight and do the PT for your very treatable condition? Don’t say “anxiety alert” because every time you take it in public you give away that it draws way more attention to you than going alone ever could. Also lol @ the nurse being like “fuck it, the world needs to see this”


Abrea’s stomach is better and Flirty breaks a tooth. This is not a terrible thing for horses since their teeth erupt constantly over their lives and part of regular horse maintenance is “floating” them – having the dentist file down rough edges to prevent discomfort. Neat.


Flirty needs surgery on her leg now after Abrea told us over and over again that it’s fine and will heal on its own. It’s actually gotten much worse and now her lock-up spells are lasting for over half an hour, sometimes with only seconds of relief between them. She admits this is causing the horse a lot of distress. She says the procedure – which isn’t really surgery – is very simple. She’ll have a bunch of tiny incisions made in the loose tendon with a large bore needle which will encourage scar tissue to form and tighten it back up. It’s relatively painless and not risky.


People shit on her for working the injured animal as long as she did. Oh my god it doesn’t even hurt!! it won’t affect her in the long run!! Flirty’s wellbeing comes lightyears ahead of Abrea’s!


Next post: packing to bring Flirty to Comicon!!! She seemingly hasn’t even had this procedure yet so she’s still limping around in distress but fuck that, mommy needs you at the comic book convention or else they might think she’s just another fat, greasy nerd instead of a very special spoonie.


She goes to visit Myranda who has all of her loud-ass hounds outside. The addition of a horse to the mix makes the cacophony of hound sound go into overdrive as all three bay and hoot at Flirty. The landlord of the house next door tells Myranda to do something about the noise. Myranda reacts as she always does, which is to say pop off at people for criticising her. Hilarious since she also claims she needs her dog with her for PTSD and extreme anxiety and even eye contact can send her into a panic she can’t pull herself out of. The landlord retaliates by calling animal control to report that they have a horse grazing on the property, lmao. Abrea films to yell about muh ADA.

Ahh the event that made me decide I really did want to waste this much of my time documenting her: She takes her horse to comicon and they stay at a hotel. Myranda mentioned the litter box and my brain went, "but she's a service animal. Isn’t she housebroken?” So I popped over to her account for the first time in years and uh, here we are.


Amazing that these women both claim to suffer severe and constant episodes from PTSD even just going to the grocery with their pets but going to comicon is NBD. They even put the horse in a costume for max attention.


Aww, sad Abrea. She’s trying to show people that life with a service animal isn’t all fun and games and it totally isn’t for attention because omggggggg why would she do all this just for attention and internet points? But listen. What she’s complaining about is that the horse wakes her up in the middle of the night demanding more food. First of all she had to know this was what horses are like before she decided to sleep next to one every night, right? She’s been a weird horse girl since she was a kid. Also let's just pretend that the sleep deprivation from a horse waking you up constantly is somehow worth it for the services they provide. Even not really knowing horse behavior I’ve figured out that every “alert” this animal allegedly gives and every “task” she performs is just trying to get another snack out of Abrea and I refuse to believe someone who has been around horses her entire life isn’t fully aware that’s what’s happening. There's no way she genuinely believes any of this is a true n' honest task, she just knows the horse makes her very special because even in a world of endless service dog fakers, no one else has a pony.


People are now THREATENING!!! Flirty so she got cameras for the paddock which allow us to see the small space this animal has to stretch her legs in, and again she’s only out here in good weather when Abrea decides she doesn't need her life-saving tasks for a few minutes.


Oh hey this cutie is named Sam(pson) and we’ve seen him before but never talked about him. Well, we did. Kinda. It’s complicated!


Abrea wants to commit supercide-by-deer while driving home at night. There's a term for this, something like “passive suicidality,” when it’s not really considered suicidal intent usually because you are not actively trying to hit the deer. It’s the same as thinking “I wish I would not wake up” but not actually eating a handful of ativan and putting a plastic bag over your head to make sure it happens. Its not exactly a healthy thought but it’s not full on making plans to end your life. She’s also now self-injuring which in her world means scratching at her scalp with her fingernails (which is cured by wearing a pride bandana and a shirt that says “queer” lest you’ve momentarily forgotten she’s bisexual.) She also complains of something that’s gone on for six months – my headcannon is it’s the increasing scrutiny she’s been under including people posting photos they snapped and leaving comments about her being an attention-seeker on news articles. The only reason she hasn’t committed herself to the psych ward is her very supportive roommate.


Still claiming she needs a horse because of dog allergies. tagging Susan.


She’s now claiming she has PTSD-related agoraphobia and if she doesn’t constantly go out places with her horse it’ll just get worse. Of course she draws a crowd when she does because she’s bringing a horse in public and this makes her PTSD-related anxiety worse. She’s been put on short-term disability.


Silly horsie eats an ice cream cone.


And cupcakes although tbf i think these are some fancy horse treats shaped like cupcakes. Abrea’s medication has been changed after the suicidal thoughts started and she’s feeling better. It was really touch-and-go last week when she was playing with her horse at the zoo and eating ice cream.


Showing off another of Flirty’s tasks which is… exactly the same as all her other tasks. She holds out her hand and the horse nudges and mouths it to see if there’s food in it. This is great for making Abrea laugh when her depression is so bad she might kill herself.

Abrea’s roommates go out without her and that means she’s all alone with just her highly trained psychiatric service horse and her emotional support kitty cat. What will she do? Take the horse to a movie, of course. Everyone in the comments just wants to make sure the horse is okay. No one gives a shit about Abrea’s muh mentulzing. They just wanna make sure Flirty isn’t getting stressed out or having her little eardrums blown out.


That was not at all the response she wanted, so she voluntarily checks herself into the psych ward.


It’s the standard 72 hour affair. She claims that Sunday she “nearly attempted suicide” but then had a “moment of clarity” right before acting on whatever plan she had and checked herself into psych after sleeping on it. They determined the new medication is what was making her suicidal even though she started taking it because she was suicidal. Okay, whatever.


Haha. Ha. Ha. She’s been “misdiagnosed” and it’s “common for trauma patients to receive this misdiagnosis.”


It’s BPD. It’s always BPD.


Why did "white girls fuck dogs" just play in my head?


It’s Sampson again! We’ll be seeing a lot of him but for the sake of good storytelling, all we really need to say now is his owner is friends with Myranda and Abrea and quite a lot younger than both of them. She’s only in her late teens at this point.


funny horsie has a bow, do not acknowledge her or the clown she's tied to will REEEEEEEE


Here’s that dissociation task again, where Abrea’s playing on her computer and not feeding the horse so the horse comes over and demands food and attention.

Susan ded.


Abrea finally realizes that other restaurant patrons are creeped out by her horse silently staring at their dinners while they try to eat and now she sticks to hightops Flirty can stand completely under.


Attention is good.


Hanging out with Myranda and Sampson’s owner again.


Another of Flirty’s incredible tasks: standing still. Since she’s a prey animal she’s always looking out for uhhhhh whatever eats horses in the wild. Mountain lions? Wolves? I just realized I don’t know what part of the globe horses are native to so I can’t even conceptualize what naturally preys on them. So she stands and watches her periphery as prey animals are wont to do and this is actually a very highly trained PTSD task to help Abrea’s hypervigilance instead of a horse not wanting to be dinner for some large carnivore her equine instincts tell her is lurking around every bend.


This is a dog backpack that was available from PetSmart and advertised for carrying small items like poo bags and a water bottle so you can take your dog on outdoor adventures. You can even see the poo bag dispenser on the side.


She’s had a major setback in her scratchy scalp syndrome after the inpatient hospital says she can’t wear her bandanas because it’s a safety risk. She won’t be teaching Flirty to interrupt this behavior because idk. I mean we know why. Flirty doesn’t know anything except “food?” and therefore this task would look identical to every other one she performs: horsie nudges abrea until horsie gets fed.


She’s still riding Cadenza the dressage horse. She probably shouldn’t be. I don’t know what the loadbearing capacity of a dressage horse is but I feel like it’s less than one Abrea.


Oh boy it’s time for a deep munchie rabbithole entirely because I enjoy showing off that after half a decade of documenting this shit I am starting to piece a whole picture together from many fragments

Spoiler: down we go!

willow/fortheloveofbane has been mentioned upthread. She's a Florida Woman although like I said her account has been private forever and I don’t really know anything about her. Her dog Bane died suddenly. From what little I can find, it sounded like a situation where she was told it was something simple and treatable but it was actually cancer and by the time they found it he was terminal. Super common. Dogs rally until they can’t and by then it’s too late. Willow lives with Rose, who used to have a service dog named Oliver. That’s the pit bull in this pic. Rose is originally from Alabama and moved to Florida to live with Willow right around when Bane died.


Willow took in Gnar, one of Mel Lucas’s rejects, as her new SD. As far as we know there were no real behavior issues with Gnar. He was just too small for fatass Mel Lucas to use for mobility.


But we know Gnar was trained by Mel working with Expanding Intelligence, a dubious service dog program...


...who also “trained” Elisabeth Bise’s dog Kuzco, who was released from their program even though he had severe behavior problems and couldn't reliably do any of the tasks they charged her $25k to teach him. The told her he was from a great breeder with full health certs and she didn’t find out until much later that he was a backyard special via a puppy flipper. He also came to her with UTIs so bad he was going septic after being left in his crate for days.


They helped “train” Cassie Jones’ dog, Juniper, a basketcase of a dalmatian who never learned to do anything but panic but who got dragged to disney all the time anyway.


The second dog in the pic up there is EI owner Cat Gentile's own dog Saxon, who was allegedly reactive as hell and attacked Sydney Going’s dog. Normally I wouldn’t believe a word Sydney says because she’s a compulsive liar about literally everything, except that others have backed up that Saxon was a ticking time bomb.


So Gnar had been trained with EI in Disney World and was used to it, but Oliver was new in town and had never been in a situation like that. He’s already just been moved from nowhere Alabama where he was an only dog to Lakeland, Florida where he is in a whole new house with new dogs and now he’s dragged to one of the most overstimulating places on the planet for a long day of strange and scary new experiences. This was not the only time she took him.


A few weeks later Rose posts that Willow has gotten a new dog named R2D2 from New Horizons. Weird, since NHSD doesn't just call you up and say "okay come pick a dog out." You get approved and then have to go for weeks of matching with a dog and handler classes. She had to know she was getting R2 long before she took in Gnar. But to be fair we don't really know how long she had Gnar before Rose moved in. It could have been months and Gnar is just new to Rose. So Oliver was trained by a screeching asshat who knows nothing about dog behavior and can't take criticism, Gnar was trained by a dog sport enthusiast who i hate but whose dogs are generally considered well behaved, and R2D2 was trained by an actual program, and they’re all in an apartment together.


Just in case you're a new friend to the thread, we’ve seen NHSD a lot. They gave dogs to Shelby Lynn Logsdon/Julian Gavino


Phoebe Stone.


And of course the queen of my heart, Amanda “Skinwalker” Winig.


We even know who raised R2D2! It was Rachel Denton, in tandem with one of her friends when she was attending Liberty U. so NHSD does cater a lot to the Trevino set but they are a full program with 2+ years of socialization and training and they do have a lot of their dogs go to legitimately disabled people. I’m pretty sure the other dog in this pic went to someone with SMA1.


Rachel’s dog Mozart also came from NHSD because after years of training them she decided she wanted to fake sick so she could have a service dog of her very own. And we know how that ended up: she had a series of strokes from fucking around and now she has real disabilities and found out it’s not very fun.


A week after introducing R2D2, Rose posts that he’s been returned to NHSD after three attacks on the other dogs. Twice R2 attacked Oliver over a toy, once when Oliver was interested in the toy and the second time when he wasn’t even looking in that direction. The third incident happened when Willow tried to do “leave it” with a dropped chip and the NHSD went bananas and attacked Gnar. That was the final straw. They also claim NHSD sent them a dog covered in mats and hotspots. Look, I’ve followed a LOT of New Horizon dogs and I’ve never heard anything like this about any of their dogs. Also there’s that multi-week program you have to attend after being accepted where Willow would have seen the mats and hotspots in advance if they were really that bad.


Paradigm.canines is Mel, here gloating that her dog wasn’t the one that went crazy.


In July after days of hinting about some SD drama she doesn’t want to discuss, Mel announces that Gnar has been returned to her to work through some issues.


Rose never said what happened, Willow is private, and Mel doesn’t want to get into it. How do we solve this riddle? Well for starters, we can see how Gnar and Oliver interacted. Cat Gentile is a big fan of this “hug” trick and taught it to all the EI dogs, but never really explained what utility it had. You can see up yonder, Kuzco, Gnar, and Mel's other rejected dog Teemo are all doing it on Cat in one of the photos. Because Rose is a giant attention-seeking imbecile who doesn't understand dog behavior, she decided it was super cute to make Gnar do this trick over and over to Oliver.


Rose abruptly retired Oliver a few weeks later saying his allergies had gotten too bad. It takes a long time for her to really come clean about it. For the entire time she had him Rose complained of other dogs attacking hers out of nowhere all the time and it was never ever Oliver’s fault. After one particular fight at a dog park “some breed traits surfaced” which is a nice way of saying he became dog aggressive and got in fights all the time. This got so bad that he had to be sent to live with her parents which she explicitly says is because Willow will be getting a new service dog soon although she tries to frame it as “it’s unfair to Oliver that he gets shut up in my room while we work with our other dogs.” This is all to say that we can come to some conclusions about what happened with R2D2, Gnar, and Oliver, who the aggressor was, and that Willow has been living without a service dog this whole time because she couldn’t even consider getting one while Oliver was around.

That was fun, I just love incestuous munchie hives don’t you? Back to this asshole. She takes Flirty to another restaurant where she doesn’t behave. How would she even tell the difference between begging food and a lifesaving alert in this context?


Separated at birth???


She goes back to work after her suicide vacation but she’s struggling. She spends her days off at the psych offices. Remember that her job is WFH email-only customer service. I’m sure it sucks but it’s not like she’s dealing with customers face to face.


SO. Sampson was owned by Jadeynn who now also has Löfte the Greater Swiss Mountain Dog. We know Jadeynn because she and Myranda had beef but then again, who doesn’t Myranda have beef with?


According to Abrea, Jadeynn needs a larger dog for mobility and doesn’t have the spoons to handle both Sampson and Löfte. She’ll be keeping both for now but gradually phasing (not fazing) Sampson out as Löfte learns the tasks she needs. Abrea will take Sampson and continue to work him as her new service dog. You see, she wasn’t actually allergic to dogs after all! Yanno with her previous dog sitting, her holding puppies up to her face, living with a dog, letting Jessa and Saoirse roll on the bed, going to dog expos, hanging out with SDs constantly including putting them in her car and sharing hotels with them. . . I totally believed that she had this terrible allergy and was not just a weird horse girl who wanted to bring a horse with her everywhere for maximum attention!


Now I want to bring us back to when Abrea told us all about her eating disorder back in part 1. She said it started in her Junior year of undergrad which to non-burgers is third year of university, which in her case was 2007. She was practicing for her piano recital when she had some issues with her hands and became so anxious her piano playing days were over that she wasn’t able to eat. She found out it was nothing serious but after dropping ten pounds and remembering her teenage friend’s real eating disorder, Abrea caught the anorexia. I did a little facebook archaeology and here is the oldest picture I can find of her. July 2006, right before her junior year would have started. She’s just average sized. Still has the round face but she can still shop in normal people stores.


May 2007, we can see she’s lost a bit of weight so that tracks. Based on her timeline her ED started a few months before this point.


The rest of her story is that after a month of skipping meals she pulled a friend into a rehearsal room to tearfully confess that she had become anorexic. She then started therapy for the ED and spent three years struggling while losing weight until she had to shop in the kids’ section. But Abrea posted tons of pics back then to show off her horses. Just the fat distribution thing again. zero titties, zero ass, but she still has chubby arms, a round face, and a bit of a belly. It's almost impressive.


She also bought a baby grand piano in summer 2007 and posted pictures of it coming into the house. She thinner than she was in 2006 for sure, and that weird fat distribution is… something. But she’s short and her lower body is disproportionately thin. Maybe she managed to find some juniors riding pants that fit her chicken little legs or something but she really doesn't look "kids sizes" small to me.


These weren't dated. They're from a slideshow she posted of her college performances after the fact. But I'd venture they're from around this period. I'm not saying she's fat in any of them but I don't look at any and go "christ, someone get that woman a cheeseburger."


The rest of it about how she struggled for years? By 2008 she’d gained it all back.


And throughout her Masters program – the years she was allegedly struggling the hardest and hit rock bottom where she was in kids’ sizes – she just steadily gained. Here she is in 2009.


And 2010.


Now I don’t doubt she weaseled her way into long term ED treatment with a therapist by saying she struggled with meals and played this up for as many years as she could before it became apparent she had no problem eating. There’s a whole herd of girls on LCF’s pro-ana scumbags thread that claim terrible restrictive eating disorders despite morbid obesity and even get themselves placed in residential treatment and tubed for them. Maybe she even did struggle to eat for a while. My point is pre-Flirty, before PTSD, she made this her identity to the point of getting a NEDA logo tattoo. Recently she's been through the meat grinder of social media commentary when she was claiming Flirty was learning heavy mobility tasks. A lot of the discussion circled around whether Abrea picked the horse because she was simply too goddamned fat for any dog. I wonder if her sudden miracle recovery from her lifelong severe dog allergy and deciding Sampson is perfectly fine for her needs has to do with "I need a horse for mobility" clashing with her romanticization of EDs and pretending to be a skinny ana-chan.


Another factor is that people have been asking for more task and training videos and every single one Abrea posts just proves this horse is nothing like a dog. She has to be coaxed into everything because her instinct is always to eye things with suspicion and try to back up. Even familiar things sometimes throw her for a loop.

It’s finally time for Abrea’s attention-seeking to break out past her hometown of Omaha and hit the international stage. She announces she’s taking her horse on a flight to New York to film a TV segment about service mini horses. What could possibly go wrong?


She’s on her way! Here’s Flirty at the airport.


They landed safely. Flirty did great!


They actually only went to Chicago, a much shorter flight on a smaller plane than anticipated. Abrea touched down, visited a family member, then got right back on the plane and went home. The whole flight was staged for TV because the Department of Transportation decided that airlines must accept service mini horses. This TV program reached out to Abrea and arranged the whole thing so that they could do a story about it. Abrea's own photos and testimony of the trip show what a disaster it actually was. It's already a tight squeeze for service dogs trained to curl up and tuck under a seat but a mini horse is larger than even a giant breed dog and it doesn't lay down and can't curl up. Flirty takes up all of the neighboring seats’ legroom (don't worry, it was the journo) and spends the whole flight struggling to stay balanced and bumping the backs of the seats in front of her. Because of the layout of this plane, that's the business class passengers she spends the entire flight banging into. Imagine you paid more for a bigger, more comfortable seat and you spend the whole time with a horse slamming into your spine because she can't keep her balance.


A bunch of newspapers report on this and while most of them talk about how Flirty is a true n’ honest service horsie who saves her handler’s life every day, the general public is way less kind. People ask what happens if the animal who cannot physically hold its bowels can’t hold it on the plane. Abrea said she took her potty right before takeoff. So there is a photo in the slides of flirty in a service dog relief area inside the airport but like. What happens if the plane gets stuck on the tarmac for three hours? Or the changing air pressure does a number on her little horsie GI system like it does to some humans? Some people question why the horse helping Abrea with anxiety is more important than the horse’s own wellbeing, what differentiates an anxiety horse from an emotional support animal, what happens if there’s an emergency during the flight, or just in general laughed at her for the stunt and compared her to the emotional support peacock case.


I particularly like Gregg here. I know brother, I feel your pain.


how dare u this horse is not an ESA! She has many life-saving tasks including "begging for food" and "begging for food, but at the grocery store.'


Abrea is now learning that “pay attention to me” on a global scale is not what she wanted. She was already stressed by getting criticism from other spoonies and locals. Now people in Ghana can click on and laugh at her.



She’s posting photos other passengers took and acting like it’s NBD.


But blocking anyone who doesn’t agree with her god-given right to take her horse on a plane.


And even though she juuuust posted cute horsie pics from the flight suddenly we're back to "you are risking my life every time you take a photo of me and make fun of me being an attention-seeking idiot on your own social media!"


Suicide prevention event. Wears a pin to let people know she’s bisexual because why are bisexuals like this? I thought perhaps with the name "out of the darkness" it was some reference to 'coming out' and that this was specifically geared towards the rainbow but no, it's just regular suicide prevention and she decided to announce her sexual orientation for some reason.


The Inside Edition piece is released and now she’s at the mercy of youtube commenters.

And then locals start to chime in that Flirty is nowhere near as well-behaved as this makes her look and causes sanitation issues when she's around food.


While Abrea's still marinating in the idea that the news piece about her service horsie will make people see once and for all that she is very special and needs her horse at Hobby Lobby or she will die, her fans warn her of a new video out about her that is absolutely vicious.


His youtube name is Roland Martin Unfiltered and I will be honest, I did not watch it because oh my fuck these may be the most annoying people on the planet. I do know from comments he called Flirty a “pony horse” and an “emotional support donkey” and said she was proof this shit had gone way too far.

Abrea keeps digging the hole deeper. She admit that while she was on short term disability she couldn't afford Flirty's special, super-absorbent and odor-reducing indoor shavings and had to use regular shavings. The company that makes her usual shavings donates two bags but its too late. People who just clicked on to see what a service horse was all about have already learned that Abrea and Flirty were living in a stinky horse shit dungeon in the weeks leading up to the flight.


Still posting about this flight because her need to draw attention to herself trumps any self-preservation instinct.


To make matters even worse, Sampson is now transitioning to live with Abrea. The people who believed her that she needed a horse instead of a dog because of her allergies now see she not only isn’t allergic to dogs, she already has an allegedly trained service dog. She says Sam will just be a backup for Flirty but doesn't explain why she can't retire Flirty now that she has a dog. Don't worry, we'll discuss Sampson and why he looks like he wants to drink a tall glass of cyanide soon.

That'll do for tonight. I need a break because shit's about to get even more hilariously humiliating for Abrea Hensley and her bored horsie.

 

[Gengar]

Forget about the practicalities. Dude, a fucking  horse. If I awoke during the night to a dark, long face staring at me from the bedside I'd literally think I'm having sleep paralysis. What the actual fuck?

 

[The former Jack Donaghy]

@Kate Farms Shill , while all your write ups are award worthy, this one takes (and eats) the cake. I cannot believe how riveted I am by this fat, boorish, smelly idiot and her weird, filthy, miserable horse.

 

[Slippin Kimmy]

This is obviously such a nice little creature too -- others would have bitten and/or stomped the living daylights out of her for pushing them into so many awful situations. Just look at that sad, under-muscled neck as well. The poor thing obviously doesn't get nearly enough exercise/free running time. I deliberately avoid most of the animal (and child) related things on here because it just makes me MATI to no good purpose, and I see I have to add "horse as a fake service animal" to that list.

Minis can be either really sweet and smart or little demons in my experience. Flirty appears very well behaved because she used to be a show horse and if it was halter stuff they're literally trained to stand there and walk and that's all they do. She looks so under-muscled like the lack of activity has been wasting her. At the very least I'm assuming her feet look okay because those boots won't fit if they have overgrown toes so... There's... That I guess.

My horses are perceptive to my moods and can tell when I'm stressed out but I'd never think to say that they'd cut out as animals that can "alert" to medical situations. The only thing they alert to is when I have treats in my pocket.

 

[2525ABC]

The idea of an anxiety horse is killing me. I love the buggers but they're basically couches with anxiety!

Spoiler: Horse sperg

I can't imagine living like that, I've mucked a few stalls and the smell is just... ew. And those were thoroughbred racehorses who spent most of the day out in a field! Everything about this is just so wrong.

What else... yes, that mouthing your hand thing is indeed looking for food, and if you're not careful you might get chomped on. Yes horses need room to run, no it will not ever be comfortable with stairs. No they can't actually be potty trained, if, and it's a big if, you learn the horse's cues you may be able to get it outside in time. They don't handle loud noises well, and a spooked horse is a dangerous horse.

That's 2mg of prazosin, the starter dose for PTSD related nightmares.

Yeah. We are their emotional support humans not the other way around. I have seen anxious kids make HUGE progress at the yard because of the confidence boost that comes from modelling calmness and security to a neurotic quadruped tho.

 

[Chan the Wizard]

I missed these Kate Farm Shills write ups so much.

 

[Less Nasty Old Person]

Flirty is a really nicely built horse. Mini breeders aspire to create a tiny horse with the same proportions as a full sized one, and Flirty is a ssuccess in that regard. She's no Thelwell Shetland, that's for sure. Most minis are fugly little trolls with big heads and short stumpy legs. Some also suffer from crippling dwarfism as well.

So, Flirty was probably not cheap to buy. As a mare, she'd have pretty good value as breeding stock, especially if she passes on her tiny size and good proportions. Well, except for the locking stifles, but that's NBD if you're only breeding for looks anyway. Looks like Abrea did some halter showing in the past, and she had at least one pic of her showing a post-legged meatball quarter horse.

So, will the next Flirty saga be babies babies babies? A service-pony mill? Feom her squalid bedroom with its kiddy pool "stall"? I can hardly wait.

 

[Scoia'tael]

I'm curious about Abrea's familial financial situation.

Horses ain't cheap and from the look of things she rode competitively throughout her childhood which is a massive outlay of expense for entry fees, competition clothing, and transportation/boarding the horse. It's one thing to have a horse and ride redneck just for the love of the animals, completely another to show. From the looks of things too she competed in both English and Western styles so take all the show-related expenses listed above and double them.

A masters degree in piano performance ain't cheap either. Pissing away all that money for that degree and then... doing absolutely nothing with it just reeks of the kind of detatched-from-reality privilege of someone who grew up very wealthy. I hesitate to call it a "useless degree" because the world needs music but there's definitely a level of indulgent idiocy to just abandon it after in favor of blowing up like a beach ball and taking a pocket pony everywhere so you can cry oppression when people point and laugh I get the feeling she may not have been very good at piano and it was a pay-to-play kind of deal.

She doesn't seem to have much money now though and I'm curious about what happened. Daddy cut her off? Everything lost in the 2008 recession? Gambling? Nigerian prince scam? I'm riveted.

I know munching is an expensive hobby but I feel like she may be (or may have been at one point) one of our wealthier ones - if only because of her parents.

 

[Kate Farms Shill]

I get the feeling she may not have been very good at piano and it was a pay-to-play kind of deal.

I can't be the judge of that but here's some of her performances:

 

[Bibbity Bobbity]

Christ, KFS. Every one of these bitches is worse than the last. Not one gives a solitary shit about the animals' welfare. They're just props for attention getting, which they then deny wanting. PERFECT.

Also: exposing innocent people to an agricultural animal, where they never thought they would be exposed.

Again, I wonder about where the fuck the parents have been during their kids' college years and 20's. Do they just brag to the neighbors "Ah-brea is doing great! She has a mini service horse for anxieties! Flirty lives in her room! Marvelous!"

 

[Scoia'tael]

I can't be the judge of that but here's some of her performances:

To be fair neither can I. It sounds great to me but then again I am not a classical music sperg. I know the autism is off the charts in those circles though and especially at a semi-pro level the criticism is brutal and the expectations are impossible to meet

I can see how aquiring a tiny horse and retreating to the comfort of food and the smell of manure would be appealing after one too many too-harsh critiques from an authority figure about how your hands are like talentless sausages and you should go kill yourself because the flow of your otherwise impeccable playing was disagreeable to them.

 

[bliblblblbbllb]

With my credentials being "just trust me bro" as I don't want to PL about my relation to the music world....

Spoiler: Just trust me bro

She could be a music teacher, k-12 piano instructor, play at weddings or churches or restaurants. But she's not good enough for the world of actual performance art, she would never get a stage to herself unless it was pay-to-play. She would not be a famous pianist or able to get into the more elite groups. Based on these videos. My area isn't piano so I can't tell you anything about the actual pieces.

I'm guessing, based on the extreme attention seeking qualities, that is what she wanted: That she'd be playing to an audience that's only there for her, and afterwards everyone would have a standing ovation. Just like she maybe had as a 10 year old. She wouldn't be happy being background ambience at a fancy restaurant. Or playing music at a wedding rather than being the bride.

There's a really good scene in Of Human Bondage [bondage as in human dependencies] and in the movie they actually open with it. The main character Philip Carey has attempted to establish himself as an artist in Paris. He finally is able to have a much more established painter and critic visit him to see his art. Philip asks if he'll be able to make it in the art world. The art critic says he could make it work...... if he was willing to be poor the rest of his life.... He's a good artist but he's never going to be a famous or rich artist, he's not that special. Philip is crushed, but eventually recovers and after a few odd jobs, becomes a family doctor. This mimics the life of the author somewhat.

...In contrast, other people get mini horses that piss where they both sleep.

Tldr: is what you'd expect, she's not good enough to get famous but she could play at your wedding or something

 

[Thomas Eugene Paris]

I have been waiting for your "mini service horse" post for ages, @Kate Farms Shill, and it did not disappoint.

At first, I thought I had so many questions, but upon further reflection, all of them can be distilled into a single esoteric conundrum, which I'm screaming into the metaphorical void: what in the everloving fuck?! A FUCKING HORSE?

Also, Abrea is fat and I would not have sex with her, with or without the horse, and her name reminds me of that over the counter treatment for oral herpes (Abreva).

 

[SNU]

I'm convinced horses can smell fear. I am scared of horses (not like a panic attack kind of fear. Just like on edge fear because i dont trust them not to spaz out over something minor and kick me) and if I'm in a group of people and there's a horse near by it comes straight up to me to get attention even if there's other people closer to it.

So maybe a horse could recognize anxiety but I think a horse would get sick pleasure out of provoking the anxiety rather than helping. Maybe it is as well trained as she claims but it chooses to misbehave in public to provoke her anxiety because horses enjoy the suffering of others

 

[Sparkling Yuzu]

I'm convinced horses can smell fear.

This was proven in a study with dogs but they found it makes the dogs scared too and not more aggressive like people have assumed. I don't know if horses are smart enough to be manipulative like that, they're probably curious why you are not happy to see them like most people and want you to like them. Domesticated animals like horses, dogs etc. have a deep-seated need to please humans.