Dead air, he did a video from a gurney, there was not a single fucking moment of reflection. It was Muffin, floor, hospital, nursing home, house, second house, blocked by chavez, gas tweet.
Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental
- Thread starter Gentlebastard
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Hungry Homeless Handjob
kiwifarms.net
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Now he's arguing with family members in advance like they're correcting him in the comments...
Those aren't brownies, they aren't even blondies. At best they're some sort of lazy ass version of fudge squares. They aren't 3 ingredients, he's got enough "frosting" on there for a cake twice the size... and somehow it's the frosting that he won't eat as if the melted pile of chocolate chips and cashew butter aren't just packed with sugar? for fucks sake...
He even says "it's like lemon fudge!" at the end of the video, so this retard just doesn't know what a brownie is at all then? Since when the fuck do you even put frosting on brownies? or fudge? "and I don't like lemon, but this is amazing guys" of course you don't like lemon Fatty, it isn't part of your food groups of meat/cheese/grease/sugar, and of course it's actually "amazing guys" because you just crammed a pile of sugar into your face.
On the gas shot again, I just realized our four time stroke champ made a joke about having a stroke.
I wish the recipe police would kneel on Jack's neck.
Tammy was pissed when she dropped the cream cheese.
I wonder how much shit Jack added to this off camera, I saw the shurgur sack.
Remember, eat before you eat.
I wish the recipe police would kneel on Jack's neck.
Tammy was pissed when she dropped the cream cheese.
I wonder how much shit Jack added to this off camera, I saw the shurgur sack.
Remember, eat before you eat.
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- Dec 13, 2022
I think Jack Scalfani hit me with a flash bang in the video. there’s this constant high-pitched ringing sound in the beginning of the mimeo.
There is a mic hiss, but I think his stupid ass is also running the dishwasher behind himself while filming.
James done did it
kiwifarms.net
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- Dec 19, 2020
Looks like the results of a game of soggy biscuit. Jesus H.
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- Feb 24, 2019
That looks like sawmill gravy biscuits from a sad undercooked hell.
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- Jun 23, 2015
Tammy Jr. is fat and I nor Jack Jr. would have sex with her, though for two completely different reasons.
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- Apr 14, 2013
I thought you were talking about Tammy and Jack for a second, I really need to get some sleep. Speaking of which, I'm sure Jack can't even get it up with all his health problems.
What's funny is that despite fucking around with HRT, Chris Chan is still more virile that Jack at this point. Even if Jack could find his dick, there's no way he doesn't have such a bad case of ED that caverject wouldn't even work on him.
Goddamnit, I'm speculating on lolcow dick now, that's my cue to call it a night.
TheMovieGuy
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- Mar 1, 2021
The best Jack bit will always be that he has 0 clue what he's talking about. Great "brownies" Jack!
Ihatejackscalfani
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- Jun 2, 2021
His new "brownie" recipe reminds me of his old "cinnamon roll hack" video.
Out of all the years of cooking this mother fucker still can't create a simple frosting.
God damn you, Jack.
Out of all the years of cooking this mother fucker still can't create a simple frosting.
God damn you, Jack.
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Nah, he can make a simple frosting. The problem is usually he suffers from two issues related to his fatness. The first being putting frosting on shit that doesn't need it or using way too much. The second, is that he doesn't wait for shit to cool down before putting frosting on it(because he can't ever wait to consume calories, which is why he burns his mouth all the time like a retard, or burns his food because he thinks if he cooks everything on high it'll cook quicker but only results in a burnt exterior and raw interior) resulting in it melting, separating, and looking like he just jacked off a horse onto whatever happens to be on the plate or in the pan.
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- Sep 29, 2022
He sounds so incredibly BAD. Guy sounds like he's a week away from dying or something. But then all that food he's eating in California is going to be catching up to him.
And yes. It can't be called a brownie. There's no cocoa in it. That's literally the definition of "brownie" because of it's color. But then this is the same faggot that doesn't understand what "roulette" and "wars" actually means.
Of course he would know what fudge is.
And yes. It's practically a fudge.
Fuck me but that is revolting in every sense. But I'm sure Jagoff Scalfatty knows what semen tastes like. He'd be the guy to willingly be the last guy to jizz on it just to be able to eat it all.
In the case of cinnamon buns you need to frost them when they're still warm because the frosting needs to melt into them making them even more sticky and gooey.
But yeah he does so because he can't wait to take one bite so he can give the rest to the homeless.
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- Feb 23, 2021
Something teils me he hasn't had anything resembling a sex drive for women since he knocked Tammy up for the last time 20+ years ago. Why he is fine with Tammy's bulls as long as he can eat and buy smokers and go out with his male 'friends' into oblivion.
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- Jan 15, 2017
Once you hear that death rattle, it never escapes your brain.
Jack's voice definitely has a hint of that to it, like he's struggling to breathe at all. It's very hard to hear him speak, and it's hard to look at him with how fucked his face has become. I agree with @Marisa , if he doesn't at least end up in the hospital or hospice by Christmas, I'll be shocked. His condition is dire. If he starts sounding like he's sucking the bottom of a milkshake through a straw, might as well tell Null that he'll be featuring this thread within the next day.
Jack has always done term switching like this. It's only gotten worse with each stroke. He'll say he's doing or cooking one thing and then switching to another or what he really is doing later on in the video. I've watched videos of his to mock with friends of mine that don't speak English natively, and although their English is good/very good, they always inevitably ask me WTF Jack is talking about because they can't follow from all the term switching. I always answer in some form that even Jack doesn't know WTF he's talking about. He might as well be speaking gibberish. He's pretty much at that stage in mushbrain anyway.
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- Apr 8, 2020
That sort of verbal confusion is a sign of brain damage.
TheLazyMan
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- Sep 4, 2021
2pm today (Sat. 10/21), sh*tbirds!
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- Sep 3, 2014
Some really quick points:
1. This particular idea was stolen from this website for those wondering. Only difference is the fat retard wanted more frosting, because god forbid you just enjoy the lemon brownies as is.
2. He throws a baby tantrum at using more ingredients since he knows the haters will make fun of him for getting it wrong. The irony is his gluttony is his downfall here. He didn't have to make frosting.
3. Jack proves he has a cat based mentality; much like the house cat he looks at the big ass bread tin that only filled up by about a 3rd and immediately said you should double the recipe. Ignore that brownies are supposed to be thinner and denser than fucking bread.
Anyways, this is just a simple no-bake thing that exploits chilling for hardening. Same as magic ice cream. About the only think I think he cocked up was his insistence to use the bottled lemon juice for this since that stuff has extra things in it. He probably also fucked up and got a bit of pith in it. Literally a dump cake, since that's about all Jack can do.
Also again, more proof that the diabetes causes him to regularly get angy and crave sweets. He's obsessed with them probably because he can steal these from tiktoks, but a lot of it is also due to what I suspect is him lashing out at doctors for telling him he can't eat this really anymore. At most a small square to cheat with.