What she saw as popularity was just viewers watching her car crash life and hating her
True. Remember, Chantal not only lies, but she believes her lies. Back in the coke-head days, her livestreams made her fantasize she was the popular girl in middle school, dating the football quarterback with options galore if they broke up. She’d bubble into the camera stories about her love and sex life, believing that everybody was crowded around, awed at her stories. They were virgins: Marissa and Plain Cheeseburgers, and she was the experienced, popular one they all gathered around.
But all school quarterbacks and cheerleaders get married in her mind, and she does everything to get Nads to love her and finish her fantasy. She cried on stream like a girl finding a breakup note in her locker, basking in the pity of those who she felt understood her heartbreak, but the voices of the dissenters were getting louder and louder. He’ll never marry you, you aren’t the popular girl, hes a creep, people are laughing at you. She tried stalking, eating grey pussy, and claiming abuse for drama but none of this works on a man like Nader. And her friends were starting to realize she was cracking and some were disappearing.
Chantal understands that the pretty boss of the clique gets criticized but it was overwhelming her. If she can get married then her worth as a woman, as the one everybody listens to about her superior knowledge will continue.
Fortuitously, she finds Salad, somebody blander than Bibi (only Bibi was deliberately bland.) Chantal didn’t care, she’d suck Peetz’s dick again if she needed to get what she wanted. But Salad played along and because he’s not fat and bald, she could pass him off as good-looking, which he was until our eyes adjusted. All should be well now, she has the golden ring, the prize every middle school girl who writes Mrs. with her boyfriend's last name over and over dreams of.
But Chantal is mentally ill, had always been mentally ill, and couldn’t realize she was suited to stability or normality. The other high school cheerleaders who married quarterbacks are living life, raising kids, and are over the fact that nobody wants to be them anymore. They have family, work, children, chores, all of which moved them on from those years which they never think about until one of their kids hits that age.
Chantal can never move on. She got what she wanted so badly - for a brief moment she could lay on a filthy llama and pretend to be the center of the world and have sympathy and dollars-and she did it. She ended up with the crown. But for her, it’s now what?
Aside from food, the only thing that makes her feel alive is chaos. Salad might be a lazy grifter who can’t stop her from eating, but he’s a man of his culture and he had effectively silenced her. So she had nothing to say anymore. She can make people mad over cats and Israel, but it’d be pretty mild. She tried to start fights with humans around her but her husband stopped that quickly. Her fighting against reactors is now weak as she has something to lose too. No kids, no work, no volunteering, chores, going outside, or interests. And she sneers at those things anyway. But she’s realized, she’s fat, barren, and sick.
She needs to get back to Canada for another romance or to start fights and get people upset so she can be in the center of the world again.
But she can’t; its too late and unaffordable. All she can do is eat. Soon, she’ll be broke as Death by Jen and no more fast food, just packets of cheese. A bowl of melted cheese will likely be her last meal.
